tabloid round-up

Headlines from today's rags.

Tottenham are set to fire sporting director Damien Comolli, who has angered manager Juande Ramos with his transfer dealings. (The Sun)

Well, if you think back to the Ramos appointment Levy did say that Comolli wanted him at the club as he is the perfect 'coach' to work in a DoF structure thus allowing Levy a bullet-proof patsy if things don't go well. Sacking him would help appease all the disgruntlment, although people are stupid. Fact is, if Comolli is a failure who has been allowed to spend so much money, should the person who appointed him not be made accountable?

Probablity Factor: 8/10

But Ramos has been given a personal assurance by Spurs chairman Daniel Levy that he will be given time to turn the club around. (Daily Mirror)

Ramos was told not to worry about his future by Levy immediately after Spurs' defeat by Hull City on Sunday. (Daily Star)

Dear God, not the dreaded 'vote of confidence'? Wondering how much of this is just speculation. Nobody knows, unless Levy is directly quoted as confirming he said this. Can't imagine the chairman rushing down to the dressing rooms to tell the coach not to fret.

Probability Factor: 3/10

There is boardroom unrest at Tottenham about the role Levy has played in the club's worst start to the season since 1912 after he gave the green light to Dimitar Berbatov's £30m deadline-day move to Manchester United. (Daily Mail)

This is just shit journalism.

Tottenham's first-team coach Gus Poyet is the man most likely to replace Ramos if the Spaniard does leave White Hart Lane. (Daily Mirror)

Really? Anything to do with him being the current number 2 at Spurs? Honestly, the deduction skills of the Daily Mirror astonish me. I was half expecting Spurs to invite Mitchell Thomas to take over as care-taker. Gutted.

Probabilty Factor: 11/10

Spurs' £15m winger David Bentley is furious with Ramos because he feels his manager's rotation policy is the reason he has been left out of Fabio Capello's latest England squad. (Daily Express)

More lazy journalism. Bentley should be furious with himself and his own form, being the reason he is not in the England squad. Yeah, I know, Ramos has played him out of position - not ideal, but regardless he hasn't shown anything to warrant a first team place in his natural right-wing position.

It’s squeaky bum time

During the summer everyone – the tabloids, the broadsheets, the Gillette Soccer Saturday crew, football magazines and various wannabe pundits had Spurs down as their firm favs for 5th spot. The reason all of them are laughing at us now is because Only Spurs™ could fail so spectacularly.
Not only have we started badly, but we’ve timed it so well that the press can now make Titanic sinking jokes based on this being our worst start in 96 years. Is this the most diabolical team we’ve had? Or the worst management team? No. And it’s only 7 games in. Yes, Derby were in a better position this time last season, but nobody, not even those zany journalists are mentioning the ‘R’ word with true self-belief. Even rival fans are telling me that Spurs will drag their way out of the bottom three. This is simply only a little bit worse than last season start to the season.

But if they fail to win at Stoke, expect this to change. Because if confidence is bad now, it will be non-existent if we still have two points after our visit to the Victoria Ground (edit: By Victoria Ground, I obviously mean Britannia Stadium).

What makes things even more depressing is that this current group of players are the ones that have until January to turn things around, and if they don’t then that’s that. Nobody is going to want to come here in the new year if we are still languishing in the bottom three. The profile of the club will change completely with regards to transfers. We’ll have West Ham pinching our players. New ground? Why would we need 50,000 in the Championship? Hutton and Bale will be looking for a tap on their shoulders from Fergie and Jenas will still be telling everyone that we can make the Champions League.

Digging deep is what we’ve been expecting (based on what the coach and the players have been spouting) after every defeat, only to be presented with yet another defeat.

But sacking Ramos is not an option just yet. Not because it would cost the club a reported £15M, but because Levy cannot, in pure footballing terms, afford it. Martin Jol’s tenure was undermined and destroyed. We never did find out if he could take us to the next level or not (i.e. beating Arsenal). Ramos was the man that Comolli felt he could work with. Yet the shambolic transfer window activities have done nothing to improve the squad. Jol recently spoke about how there was a clear vision during his time there with regards to English players, and that team has been gutted and replaced with a mish-mash that has no true balance.

Pav is looking more and more like a panic buy, and you almost feel as sorry for him as you do for Modric who is clearly far too good a player for this current Spurs team as he spends most of his time laying off passes that his team-mates simply don’t have the virtue of accepting.

No leadership. Another painfully obvious problem.

So Levy, having gone out of his way, to get Ramos – has to allow Ramos that extra bit of time that is usually not given in such circumstances. If nothing happens in the next 3-4 games, then sadly the team is in such a state that the players are simply not responding to the manager and Ramos time may well be up. Though the blame will fall back into the lap of L&C.

Elsewhere, Defoe scored again. Robbie Keane played a part in a 3-2 comeback win for Liverpool. Dean Marney looked busy and purposeful (even hit the post) for Hull who, well, you know what they did. And Martin Jol's Hamburg won away, and remain top in Germany. And every player we deemed not good enough for us (Steed, Chimbonda) and the targets we scoffed at (Heskey, Crouch, Anton Ferdinand and a shedload of others) all continue to assist their teams while our ‘superstars’ struggle to raise their game to a respectful level.

Are we cursed? Has this been on the cards for years? With our generally poor away record over the past decade or so, when you suddenly stop winning home games, that ‘R’ word becomes a true threat.

Three points. At Stoke. It’s that simple, yet why does it look like it’s going to be so hard?

Dreamland?

From today's Guardian:

If Tottenham Hotspur's chairman, Daniel Levy, below, names an acceptable price before the week is out the club will be sold. A billionaire investor from the Far East, delivered by the super-agent Pini Zahavi, is in talks. But Spurs fans who want change at the top must hope Levy sets aside his instinct for haggling over a couple of extra million pounds which damagingly delayed the sale of Dimitar Berbatov this summer.

ENIC set to admit defeat? Joe Lewis to wipe his hands clean?

We live in hope. I won't get rid of the domain name though. Will continue to send letters to Levy. Keep him posted with the latest. I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

As for any potential new chairman. Buy us three world class defensive midfielders. Just for larks.

Open letter sent to the chairman, via SSN

Not exactly a masterpiece this one, just a summary of recent blogs. It's also very tv-friendly. The chaps on SSN have been reading extracts from this all morning. I know. I feel dirty using SKY to get my message across, but Daniel never answers my correspondence so I was left with no choice but to use the pure unadulterated evil that is Murdoch's propaganda machine.

Dear Mr Levy,

We are football supporters, and not appreciators of accountancy. You might be good at keeping the clubs finances healthy, but in pure footballing matters you lack the edge that is required to help push the club forward. Too many times in your reign you have failed to step up when it mattered most. When we sat 4th in the table for four months, you failed to strengthen the side that surely would have helped cement Champions League football long before the final game of the season at Upton Park.

You and Comolli have never truly replaced Carrick or sought to finally end the left-wing draught with a genuine left-wing purchase. Look at all the top clubs that compete for honours. They have grafters, generals and grit. We have Jermaine Jenas and Didier Zokora. Why do you always feel the need to buy superfluous players like Bentley when what we need so desperately is a defensive midfielder? Your handling of the Berbatov saga was the final nail in the coffin.

You always knew he would be sold, it was a dead cert, but rather than setting a deadline and price at the start of the summer you preferred to wait until the final seconds. Resulting in us taking a Utd kid on loan. The irony must be lost on you.

As for Pavlyuchenko. £14M for a player who can't speak the language. Has already played several months of Russian league football and doesn't even look 75% fit. He's cup-tied for the UEFA Cup and....this is the bit that takes the biscuit.....he is a similar type of player to Darren Bent which is why we are playing with one up-front.

How exactly is this NOT a panic buy? The lad, on form, will score goals - but was he the signing we needed to replace either Keane or Berbatov? Much like there was no reason to buy Bent when we did. And no reason to sell Defoe. The decision making is criminal.

You've created a mess that Laurel and Hardy would be proud of.

Please have a word with Joe Lewis (who owns ENIC) and stick the club up for sale.

Yours Sincerely,

Spooky

Crisis? What Crisis? Oh, that one....

5 games in and already whispers of 'crisis talks' are doing the rounds. I don't tend to believe such things, simply because I'm sure the chairman meets his manager on regular occasions, and in this case what exactly can he complain about considering the mis-management of the summer transfer dealings?

Why are results so poor?
Why are our new players not settled?
Why isn't the team playing a cohesive brand of football?
Why aren't we scoring any goals?
Why aren't we in the Top 4?

Now, the anti-Ramos amongst you might suggest that our form in the Prem since he took over has been anything but spectacular - even with Berba and Keane in the side (towards the backend of last season).

Regardless, taking this season into account only - most of the above 5 questions can be linked to the fact that we simply did not prepare for the start of this season in the right manner. I'm talking about dithering with signings. It's been mentioned before, so I won't go back over the mistakes made. Not in great detail that is.

Ramos does however need to get the best out of what he has, unless of course, he can't be arsed. But other than media rumours (all denied) there isn't much to go on other than maybe Poyet's dejected face in post-match interviews.

The players need to step up with the effort, regardless of selection. But selecting the right balance would also be a welcoming addition to our climbing the table. 'An understand' is required for any set of 11 players out on the field, to function in the right manner. Football 101 people.

A crisis talk at this stage is unlikely. Re-visit this after the Carling Cup game against Newcastle and the UEFA Cup match, with Pompey sandwiched between.

Lose all three, then media pressure along with supporter outbursts, might get trigger-happy Levy all guns blazing or see Ramos leave yet another club behind due to lack of botheredness.

For once, I'd like to see the trend bucked. Just like Utd did with Fergie. Not that I'm suggesting for a minute we have the basis for future dominance. Two wins on the trot is the only kind of achievement I'm gagging for at the minute.

As for the those questions -

1. Why are results so poor?

Results are poor, but we haven't been thrashed or out-played off the park, we've just been mediocre to the extreme. Not creating enough chances to worry the opposition which means the opposition only need a couple of decent efforts to notch up a win. Confidence has played a part, or lack of. Fundamentally, results are poor because the team is not playing like a team. Probably the only side in the Prem that has no cohesive style of play or balance backbone.

That's actually both embrassing and worrying. Regardless of the cock-up seeing us sign no class DM, if the player we have bought have come in to do a job, then the job has been left undone.

Too many luxary Rolls-Royce textbook Spurs signings. No hard grafters, to plug the holes.

Levy/Comolli are to blame. But then it's difficult to say blame also doesn't sit with Ramos. How much say he has in the signings (he is meant to have a big say, as Levy stated that the DoF works with the coach to sign players). So either Ramos was happy with the dealings come end of transfer - or he was not. If he was not, then that's going to affect our on-field performances. It's not too diffcult to state this considering our results. Ramos is chopping and changing far too much.

Is this meant to be another transitional season? If so, then enough with the 'we can finish in the top 4' - when clearly getting out of the bottom 4 is proving more difficult than some would think.

Regarding the transfer policy - it's possible the players Ramos wants, which Comolli attempted to sign, are unavailable or still 'on the cards'. Regardless, there is such a thing as 'secondary' targets. I refuse to believe that there is a lack of quality - as Levy suggested. If these guys are working hard to bring in the players - they are not working hard enough.

2. Why are our new players not settled?

Bentley - Played out of position. Therefore, uncomfortable and trying way to hard to impress, resulting in woeful 'never beat the first man' corners and set-pieces.

Modric - The 'too lightweight' for the Prem is a fallacy. He can handle himself just fine. But obviously needs time to adjust, like many players do. Not everyone settles in their first game or two. Those that do, do so because the team they are in is brimming with confidence. Modric is playing in a midfield with no support. He is doing work he should not be doing. His task should be to create, run the show. But with such a disjointed middle four, he is lost amongst the confusion. This is where a true DM would have helped the lad settle into the team. It's not been a great start. But blaming him is pathetic. Remember the abuse Carrick got? Its deja vu.

Gio - A young lad, more an impact sub at the moment. Can't be critical of him at all at the moment. He isn't the finished article by a longshot, but once (if) the team start to play with style then he will flourish, much like Lennon did in the '06 Season.

Ramos has to be responsible with this side of things. The Bentley situation is not a good one. Gomes is fine, clanger or no clanger. Corluka looks a safe bet alongside Woodgate.

3. Why isn't the team playing a cohesive brand of football?

When the summer began, you had the feeling that when Chimbonda, Steed, TT and Kaboul all left - we would be replacing the lot of them with 'squad' players, to make sure we had a squad of depth (to allow for injuries and competition). But now you wonder why we let the likes of Steed especially (our hardest worker last season) go so easily. When all this has achieved is a negative impact.

But depth of squad aside, selection wise - thing's are simply not great. If the midfield doesn't work then there is simply no pattern of play that allows players to settle into a rhythm. The front one (or two if Bent starts with Pav) is lacking understanding - which is, well, understandable. Losing Berbatov and Keane (how many times has this been mentioned now?) has impacted us greatly. So, instead of drying those tearful eyes, we seem to be unprepared for each game. There is no spark to ignite or inspire. With those two former players (Keane coming deep, Berbatov creating) there was a style of play that allowed all the players to take their roles within the team and push forward with meaning.

Now, we have two players upfront who have no support. A midfield with a poor excuse for a DM and no consistent attacking/creative option (apart from Lennon, if he starts). So all the defence can do is defend, and they don't do that especially great.

Every club has the balance, even if they are shit, they have the players in the positions the team needs to allow them to function. Some function ok, others well and others on a different level altogether - mainly because of the players they have selected. We just have a group of players, who look like they have all turned up for the first time at Hackney Marshes for a kick-around.

The irony is, the players who have left, have been 'replaced' by better quality. At least, you would think that on paper.

Again, shame on Comolli and Levy for their transfer 'mare. But Ramos must know his squads strengths and play to them. I'm glad to see O'Hara in the team. Might not be great by any means, but he has bite and energy. Lennon has to start, ahead of Bentley. If Modric comes back into the team, then Ramos has to decide who will protect him and do the midfield donkey work - but even more important is that the midfield must chase all the balls, close down the oppposition and work for each other. Modric, Lennon, Gio etc can then work towards supporting the front two players.

But all this is obvious, no? Surely the manager can see this?

Most important, due to the predicament, is the three points, no matter how. Spirit and urgency, and a bit of luck - and then consistency with the team selection to allow for that fabled 'gel factor' as the team 'get to know each other better' and begin to take shape as a unit.

We can then hopefully look to next season for that push for '4th spot' (top end of table). Unless Hutton and Bale get sold to Man Utd and Jenas finally makes that move to Real Madrid.

4. Why aren't we scoring any goals?

Same as above really, re: Decimation of the front two. Still, if you spend practically £30M on two forward players, you'd think they would develop a decent understanding sooner rather than later. But, as above, the midfield have to chip in with creating openings. And thus far, there has been very little going on.

It's all linked. Team selection> team structure > midfield balance > working partnership upfront.

5. Why aren't we in the Top 4?

What, bottom 4 isn't good enough for you? It's still got the number '4' in it.

All this talk of 'top 4' is media hype, not helped by the players and management. It's not really an expectation from the fans. It was under Jol in the first of our two 5th placements. Because we sat in that position for 4 months. But this season, even with the positivity we all had, nobody felt it was going to happen. 5th spot, yes - of course, why not. Historically, the clubs who battle for this place changes every season. Like it will do this year. And again next year. Its a cert. Spurs though - on paper - are always made fav's. Although Man City will most definetley take that honour going forward. And Villa, for their steady progress.

Levy - like any other ambitious chairman - will have 'top 4' as the mission to be accomplished. But making it a reality is something else. And making the same errors each summer will do nothing to progress the team.

We should be 4th or thereabouts had we started well (based on a dream I had). We could have had 12 or so points had we swaggered from the start.

Boro away, winnable - but tradtionally a draw.
Sunderland home, - win.
Chelsea away, - draw.
Villa home, - draw or win (based on previous seasons).
Wigan home, - win.

11 points. But that's based on the expectations relating to money spent. The team has deserved NOTHING on performance. All this 'they gave everything' sounds more like 'we don't know what's wrong and we can't stop the rot'. It's scary if you spend some time thinking about it.

We haven't swaggered since the 5-1 against Arsenal, and the Cup Final. A cameo here and there since. But nothing else. Levy has to sit back, supporting Ramos and Poyet in private, and let the two of them do what they have to do to get us up and running. Comolli has to allow Ramos to make suggestions for the Jan window (how bad is that, season under way and we are having to think about bolstering our team already). And as for the fans, more of the 'We are Tottenham' than the dismay and groaning at mis-placed passes.

Tomorrow, the circus is in town. Visiting the local circus. Clowns taking centre stage. Yes, it's Newcastle away, defending the Cup we won so brightly last term. Its a must-win....(to follow on from the 'must win' games against Villa and Wigan).

Is this the turning point? I hope so. Because going to Poland to win is going to be hellmouth.

COYS, yeah? Anyone?

~Spooky

Deflected own goal

‘Dry them’ is probably what I would say if I believed Daniel Levy was sincere with his statement about Manchester United and Liverpool’s behaviour. Devious and calculated are words better associated with his actions. As he sits in his throne room with scantily clad women feeding him grapes and sucking his toes, having his PA dictating his latest rant, you and I both know that this is nothing more than a PR stunt to help deflect the fact that we are about to lose the only functioning part of the team. It is however understandable. He is protecting the interests of the club and the team. He knows as well as anyone we have lost these players already so why not deflect the disappointment and turn it into hate, vented towards Fergie and Rafa.

Regardless of whether Ferguson mentioned Berbatov’s name, either in the newspaper stories featured in most red tops and broadsheets or the alleged fans meeting and regardless of the fact that he has further evidence documented – we all know nothing much will happen other than two players leaving Spurs and probably two arriving as replacements.

So why the dramatics? Why the crusade to uphold the integrity of the game when we all know that everybody is involved in talking to players or other clubs managers outside of the correct process? It’s no secret that Utd want Berbatov. The players head was turned a long time ago. And rejecting a Liverpool bid for Keane doesn’t mean he won’t find out via his agent what the Anfield side have to offer.

Let’s run through the delightfully punchy statement.

There has been substantial speculation in respect of the futures of Dimitar Berbatov and Robbie Keane, including press comment from both Sir Alex Ferguson and Rafa Benitez. In response our Chairman, Daniel Levy has made the following statement: "Today's public comments by Manchester United's manager, announcing that he has made an offer for Dimitar and is confident that the deal will go through with time working in their favour, is a blatant example of sheer arrogance and interference with one of our players. It is also probably one of the worst offences by any manager in the Premier League to date and is unbelievably hypocritical given his recent comments in respect of Cristiano Ronaldo and Real Madrid.

Did he or didn’t he mention Berbatov’s name? The interview given at the airport has Ferguson state he has bid for a player but doesn’t state a name although it’s quite obvious to everyone there and watching on TV who it is. Others are suggesting Ferguson does mention Berbatov in another interview with United fans. Regardless, what’s the complaint about? It’s not tangible because all it amounts to is arrogance. So as far as disrespect is concerned, sure. Ferguson is being disrespectful by suggesting it’s a done deal more or less. He’s predicting a black eye of a future and it’s not nice when a bigger lad pushes you around the play ground, slapping your head with glee and unmovable confidence. There’s no detention for the bully. The headmaster is too busy chatting up the dinner ladies. But complaining and bitching about the inevitable won’t change the fact that nothing ever comes of this. The harsh truth is that football is full of liars and cheats and people in positions of power, managers included, will forever go outside the rules and guidelines, even when it’s not necessary. Ferguson is a master. And not too often are complaints made through the official channels.

"Hurry up lads, I'm late for my medical"

‘Confident a deal will be done’ is the usual high level hypocrisy we know he is capable of, acting the Billy Big Bollocks when he wants to be and throwing toys out the pram when he experiences it himself. It's double standards. The trait of the successful no less.

"This comes after a series of events, dating back to last summer, which have shown Manchester United to be in breach of Premier League (PL) rules. As a result, we have today made an official complaint to the PL about the conduct of Manchester United. Benitez made similar comments in respect of Robbie recently and we made an official complaint to the PL about the conduct of Liverpool earlier this week.

Why not complain about United last summer? Has Levy been compiling a dossier because he believes this will bring United down to their knees? I doubt very much they will unzip and gag. Tapping up players, making illegal approaches – whatever you want to call it is common practice. It’s not right, but how else can – for example – a manager of one club know and understand the interest of another? Levy surely isn’t naive to think that there is no contact prior to an official approach and permission granted. Daniel should have a chat with Paul Kemsley about his trip to Spain.

Same type of thing applies to players. If a player is at a club, and a club rejects a bid from another club – the player might be curious to know what offer is on the table, as far as personal terms are concerned. He can hand over a transfer request or he can ask the club to accept a bid so he can talk to the interested club. But in addition, he will have his agent talk to representatives of the interested club so he can sample a taster of what he will earn. Is it above board? Of course not. Does it break Premier League rules? Yes. Still happens though. And even when a club is punished for it, it’s not a devastating moment for all concerned. A few thousand pounds in fines and some moderately bad publicity. The way Levy ends the statement doesn’t suggest that either player will find themselves in the same position Ashley Cole did.

"The behaviour of both clubs has been disgraceful. We told both clubs very early on that we had no interest in selling Robbie or Dimitar, respectively, and that they should refrain from pursuing the player.

So let me get this straight. Levy told Utd and Liverpool we are not interested in selling either Berbatov of Keane and he expected them to walk away without even a whisper? Since when has that stopped anyone from chasing a player?

Both clubs arrogantly chose to ignore this request and we now have evidence that both clubs have systematically been working to prise the players away from us, outside of PL rules of conduct. Our subsequent position has been severely compromised by both clubs making their intentions widely known and indeed making contact with the players and their agents, without the Club's permission.

I’ll issue an apology if our Chairman proves to everyone that he does have evidence – and it would have to be damning for the Prem League to do something about it by going up against Sir Alex Ferguson. But an apology in such circumstances would be joyous.

Drag queen Dimitar

Shame on the likes of United and Liverpool for making public their interests in signing players and discussing potential transfers. No other clubs do that, that I can’t think of. At least not direct quotes from managers. I don’t think we ever do it. In fact I’m certain we don’t say a thing until the other club have accepted an offer and a medical has been booked. And regardless the ‘did he didn’t he’ conundrum of Ferguson’s alleged Berbatov comment and the fact that even Bryan Robson has been publicly airing his opinions on the subject, you would still need to have a Man Utd representative wearing a Utd scarf meeting Berbatov in a motorway McDonalds accepting a Utd shirt to stand even half a chance of seeing them punished.

If we do have the evidence, then I wonder why Levy had to latch onto an alleged newspaper quote – which is the only thing Ferguson has appeared to comment on and can quite easily be washed away with any other tabloid dirt. Is it really possible that Utd and Liverpool would risk the wrath of another Prem League chairman, especially one as excitable as Levy? Would be nice.

"I have absolutely no wish to sell either player and to date we have not accepted any offer for either. However, when a player's head is turned and their commitment is absent, particularly when they occupy key positions such as that of striker, they become a negative influence in a team dressing room in which they were once a positive addition and influence. This is the situation we now have on our hands, with both Dimitar and Robbie having made it clear that they wish to leave for Manchester Utd and Liverpool respectively.

"Irrespective of the outcome and futures of Robbie and Dimitar, we are continuing to seek to bring in quality, talented players for the future, who want to play in a Spurs shirt."

Ooh that word ‘however’. It decimates all that comes before it. The above perfectly illustrates the crux of the problem. Players, either directly via a club representative speaking to his agent or by the means of a manager telling the press how much he rates him or a friendly reporter making up a story to force the issue – it’s ludicrous to believe a player wont move clubs if official routes are initially blocked.

Levy knows this. Although he isn’t laying too heavy a blame on the individuals by suggesting heads have been turned but does criticise them for lacking commitment. Although some of the pics from Spain suggest otherwise. Although more than likely, Berbatov is acting up as per usual and Keane is probably throwing a strop in training (just not when he is being carried by mates on the beach). It’s almost apologetic. It’s very much inevitable.

I’ve actually gone through various opinions and emotions the past few days, and I can’t quite find myself caring too much about this now other than to say:

Sell both players
Buy replacements
Push on

You might think I’m being a tad harsh with all this. I’m not. I just don’t expect to be surprised. Ferguson, as great and successful as he has been is guilty of countless shameless moments, on (bullying refs) and off (transfers) the pitch. And yet he has the undying support and love of all the media hacks. It would be a fairytale if something was done about it and maybe then things might start to change a little. You’d get better odds on Spurs finishing 4th.

With the current monopoly in the Premier League, the Top Four will always pick and choose who they want and anyone from the likes of Robbie ‘I’ve found my spiritual home’ Keane and the apparently modest down to earth Bulgarian will rip up their contracts to move on if something bigger and better comes along. Can we blame them? Does beg the question why Berbatov even bothered to ignore Utd to sign for us in the first place. Probably a case of Utd making sure he can play in the Prem before they launch their bid and Dimitar proving the case. Keane, as good as he is, isn’t great. He is replaceable. So don’t fret too much. It's up to him if he wants to go from being a big fish in a little pond to....well, you know the rest. But it's subjective anyways. Keane could do great things at Liverpool or he could fall victim to Rafa's rotation revolution.

The reason Levy is frustrated is the same reason we all are. We buy quality players, they prove themselves at this level and then they’re picked up because two years on they realise that they have to move on to play in the Champs League. It's the stepping stone ethos. Players are about careers and are loyal to the club that suits their needs.

How will it change? One of the top 4 has to fuck up and we have to be lucky enough to take their place. Almost happened once. Until the next time....

~S

Done and Dusted

It’s a tradition for me to dress up on the final home game of the season to further highlight and bring exposure to my crusade against Levy’s incompetent reign as chairman - and this year was no different. In the past I have been naked (more of a dress down there), and chained to a turnstile. Last season I was kitted out as Harry Hotspur, in armour with plastic inflatable sword. But this season I went beyond the call of duty. I shaved my head, stuck on a pair of glasses, a suit and wore a mouth mask which allowed for the illusion of a permanent smug smile. Monopoly money stuffed in pockets and lettering on the back of my jacket stating: PLEASE BUY THE OPUS, NEED MONEY FOR CAVIAR ADDICTION. As I skipped down the High Road, I randomly jumped out in front of Spurs fans shouting:

“I’m ripping you off!”
“10% rise on your season ticket”
“Renewal by the deadline otherwise you’re banned for life”
“The bagels are never fresh”
“New stadium, are you ‘aving a laugh….is he ‘aving a laugh?”
“Let’s ground share with West Ham!”

Yes, tonight Matthew, I’m going to be…..Daniel Levy.

Within twenty minutes of arriving at the Park Lane end of the ground, I was jumped by a group of Spurs fans who were also in fancy dress. I got a taste of Levy’s abject existence if he was to relegate himself from the high life and interact with the common man as I lay on the floor like a hedgehog all curled up and motionless while Ali G, Indiana Jones, a Roman centurion and a fat bloke in sandals kicked the shit out of me. And I allowed it. I allowed it as a testament of my loyalty to my campaign to oust the chairman. Yes, they were kicking and punching me. But in essence that was Levy on the ground begging for mercy. I made myself into a living breathing visual statement of his mis-management and ordinary salt of the earth Spurs fans instinctively reacted by beating me up. As they walked away laughing, with other fans having witnessed the incident, I knew the impact made had far reaching implications. By the time you read this the video will up on Youtube and thousands will see what I created. Levy defeated by fans.

Once I dusted myself off and walked through the turnstiles, nobody took much notice of my costume. They just assumed I was a git. I burnt my season ticket in the men’s bog. Nobody noticed. And when I took my seat, people were far too busy reading the new kits catalogue because the club knows we all want to spend loads and loads of our hard earned money on a new kit and training jacket just before we spend over £600 on a new season ticket.

The game itself was a joke. But then every single match since the Cup final, bar the 4-4 draw with Chelsea (although our defending for all of their goals was poor) has been nigh shambolic. We haven’t had a decent full 90 minutes since we lifted that piece of silverware at Wembley. Now, it’s difficult to gauge whether the teams performance in the league is down to bad management on the part of Ramos and Poyet or laziness on the part of the players. You could even argue that Ramos hasn’t achieved anything in the league, with regards to progression and development and style of play. We have looked lethargic and soft for months now. Is it because more than half the players are on their way out of the club? If so, why not play more youngsters? Maybe our first-teamers don’t think they need to bother trying week in week out knowing they had UEFA Cup football next season all sorted. Why should they when they get paid no matter what?

It’s akin to you or me getting up for work in the morning, getting to our desk and then proceeding to do nothing all day other than browse the net on forums and day dream and then disappear for two hours at lunch, browsing cd’s at HMV - and still get paid your wages, and when someone questions your effort you say, “Well I turned up, didn’t I? What else do you want?”

£20,000 - £50,000 some of them pick up for doing fuck all. What a hard life. What a struggle. Lennon wasn’t anywhere near the squad on Sunday. Apparently out drinking in Loughton the previous night, he was spotted in his Ferrari leaving WHL just after 2pm. I’m guessing he had an eyebrow appointment he just couldn’t cancel. From the looks of Jenas in the first half I’m thinking he also spent Saturday night in Loughton boozing it up. No pace in midfield and no spark upfront. And Dawson in defence. It’s what nightmares are made of. Dawson and his England aspirations are always good for a laugh. Too many of our players open their mouths and talk far too often about what they want to be achieving when in reality it’s just not going to happen. Delusions of grandeur on and off the pitch. Liverpool were nothing special, bar Gerrard and Torres. But we had no equivalents to inspire something out of nothing like they so easily did.

Instead we got Berbatov doing his utmost to do nothing, making sure no last gasp injury would ruin a move away to Italy or Spain or Chelsea (there, I said it). He hardly tracked back or closed down (something that Fergie wouldn’t stand for). Everyone else was just as poor. Based on this season as a whole I’d keep Keane (fantastic goal scoring record), Woodgate, O’Hara (decent enough squad player), Hutton and Steed. King looks like he’s sticking around unless the doctors say otherwise during the summer months, but everyone else is dead weight.

Once Bale is back and Modric is settled, the escape from this bland abyss of shit will be truly complete if we can avoid any traditional Comolli signings (i.e. Zokora, Kaboul) and bring in players that are actually capable of giving something back. I say that every year, so history would suggest we are screwed. Again.

Talking of signings, maybe someone from the club can explain why Gunter wasn't involved more after the Cup final (is he injured?) and as for Gil- the best is yet come -berto, awful.......just awful awful awful.

Highlights of the game included a brawl in the East Stand between supporters. No idea if it was Liverpool fans in amongst our own, or the usual in-house fighting over much ado about nothing. Loads of punches thrown, kicking to the floor, pushing and goading. Must have been another Daniel Levy look-a-like at the centre of it. An other brother on a mission. Not a single police officer in sight during all this high drama. Just bewildered stewards watching on in fear. The police were all too busy at the various tube stations in London due to us, West Ham and Chelsea playing at home. The brawl was followed by coin/programme throwing at one of the executive boxes (just above where the trouble was) which had Liverpool fans in it. Classy stuff there lads. Especially as one of the Liverpool fans was about ten years old. The events at the JJB and Stamford Bridge were getting more cheers than anything happening on the pitch. Dire stuff all round. The sun was wasting its shine on our lot.

So that’s it. End of the season. The true test of Ramos managerial skills will run the gauntlet from the first game of the 2009 season. Apart from the Cup run we haven’t shown any evidence of improvement. There has been no swagger since last season’s exploits, nothing to match the UEFA Cup run. This years effort was abysmal, a continuous struggle from one game to the next.

From the moment that the club decided to get rid of Jol and decided that doing it publicly would be the best route to go down, we haven’t fully recovered. There have been moments. We have entertained. Scored a ton of goals and conceded us many. There’s been plenty of positives, but far too many depressing negatives. 30% of all goals conceded have come from outside the box is one of my personal favs, especially when Fulham are send in that table with just 14%. Getting rid of Robinson should save us about 18 points.

I can only hope that the reason we have been so poor is because so many players know their future is away from the club. Robinson has dyed his hair blond. Highlight of the season for him (ooh pun). He got a rousing ‘England’s number one’ during the lap of honour. It felt like the singing faithful knew this would be the last time we would see him as a Spurs player so they choose to remember better times. He waved. All very low key. Much like Berbatov’s wave as his name was sang out. All the best in the Champions League.

The 4-4 Villa draw, the 5-1, the Reading 6-4, the Cup final. It’s been a bit mad.

We’ve also gone from having a steady reliable defence (the two Jol years) to having one that just can’t defend at all. A return to the status quo then. Our home record has gone to shit. We still can’t take set pieces (apart from O’Hara corners) and still can’t kill teams off.

It’s unfair (repeating myself) to be critical of Ramos. He managed a win over Arsenal. Jol never did. We didn’t choke in either of those semi-finals and held our nerve to beat Chelsea in the final. Disappointingly, we failed in Europe – but too often this was down to the players rather than the tactics. At least that’s what I prefer to believe at the moment.

Ramos has done a damage limitation job. He has assessed the squad and from the looks of it has been winding down the season because there is nothing more for him to learn about the current batch. He has done a decent job considering that the season was practically lost when he joined (the league push for Europe was dead). Regardless of Kaboul’s rant about how we would have won the Cup with Jol in charge. We would not have won it under Jol. He had his chance the previous season.

Robinson, Lee, Kaboul, Chimbonda, Tainio, Stalteri, Cerny, Rocha (does he even exist?), Gardner, Boateng, Ghaly and Berbatov will all be gone. The other rumour is that Defoe’s transfer to Pompey included a deal that will allow Diarra to join Spurs. Arsenal wouldn’t sell him to Spurs but whether he was bought by Harry with the intention of allowing Spurs to ‘swap’ him for Defoe or that it’s just turned out that way is up to your own imagination. Defoe has apparently cost Pompey just £3M. Would explain Diarra’s ‘stepping stone’ comment 5 minutes after signing for them. Although with Pompey in a proper Cup final and above us in the Prem, it’s not so much a stepping stone but more of a trip into a muddy puddle.

Seville had a swagger about them under Ramos. I’ll be happy if we can have a bit of that about us again. And another 5th spot finish would make up for a truly unspectacular 11th.

As I left the ground, with a summer of Englandless football to look forward too, one thing sat in my mind as I contemplated next season…………will my hair grow back? That and……Here we go again.

Levy, you mug

Are you and the marketing department so desperate for money to make up for the £16M wasted on Darren Bent that are you resorting to small time kick-backs from the Spurs shop by commissioning small time crap like the above?

Yes, we beat the scum 5-1. The only mug I need to tell me the score is the mug of a miserable looking gooner.

Get fucking rid.

Time for a mass boycott of the club IMO.

NOBODY BUY CUP FINAL TICKETS IN PROTEST OF THIS QUITE DISGRACEFUL MONEY-GRABBING EVENT.

YOU'VE MADE A MUG OF YOURSELF LEVY AND YOU'VE MUGGED US OFF.

THE ARSENAL RESULT HAS BEEN OVER-SHADOWED BY YOUR GREED.

Downing

My question is, does Ramos know who Stewart Downing is? Does he know what type of player he is? Is he a Levy/Comolli signing or has our new manager had some input on this? I wonder how the conversation went....

Comolli: Hi. I got a player for you.

Ramos: A central defender?

Comolli: No.

Ramos: Another right-back? A central defender?

Comolli: No. No.

Ramos: Defensive midfielder?

Comolli: Nope.

Ramos: Keeper!!! Keeper!!!

Comolli: No.

Ramos: Please, not another...how do you say....sarding...

Comolli: ...sodding...

Ramos:.....sodding striker.

Comolli: No.

Ramos: What? What do you have?

Comolli: A left winger.

Ramos: Riiiiiight. That is exactly what we need this moment. Good thinking. Who?

Comolli: Downing.

Ramos: dos Downing? Mexican?

Comolli: Nope. From Middlesbrough.

Ramos: (laughs) Oh, you are serious. What are his abilities?

Comolli: He cant beat a man, will never be world-class, sometimes inconsistent but can cross the ball. Will frustrate fans.

Ramos: Ok. A squad player. For backup?

Comolli: No. First teamer. Big signing.

Ramos: How much for this Drowning?

Comolli: £12M. More if we can get Boro to take the money.

Ramos: You are fucking shit at your job, do you know that?

Comolli: Your English has improved.

Ramos: Call me a taxi.

Levy mythology?

Original post by Solaar from GG.net:

Levy and the myth of the signing youth for resale-value

I see that a lot of people have agreed upon Levy being a man who likes to buy young because of resale-value. I don't understand this and would like to say that it is probably just a myth, please prove me wrong. Show me a direct quote of him saying this, or else I just refuse to believe it.

If not, show me evidence of the case being him buying a youth player and then selling them for a lot more than what we bought them for. Oh, and please have in mind these conditions:

1. The player must not have expressed an obvious desire to leave.
2. The player must have been an integral part of our first-team (i.e played more than 15-20 games a season), otherwise you can't exactly say that selling the player is a big problem for us.

I actually believe that Levy does not do this. We have made progress on all levels since he came into the club. We have also had set-backs, but are they in the end his faults? The biggest set-backs imo have been Arnesen and Carrick leaving, together with signing Bent for £16 M. Bent probably is a good buy, but that amount was bad business - but whose fault is that? Levy or Comolli? The rest has brought us forward (maybe with the exception of signing Comolli, that is yet to be proved).

I believe Levy prefers buying youth because he wants to build a team for the future, not because he wants to increase our financial earnings. It is just a myth because making us a consistent top-6 team would bring a hell of a lot more money into the club than buying and reselling youth players, at least when we're talking about 18-21 year old players.

Spooky, I await your response.

Thread has (at the time of writing) hit 4 pages. I'm going to keep it simple as I think you and the other GG'ers have covered just about every angle imaginable on this subject.

Regardless of whether the policy exists or not, Spurs/Levy do not spend money on 'ready made super-stars'. The closest we have come to doing so is signing Berbatov, who was far from being world-famous when he signed for us. Its more than obvious he aims for players that potentially can turn into great players, therefore giving us a win-win situation. We keep them, the team improves. We sell them, we're in the money. The crux is, we don't sell players unless they want to leave (or at least that's the illusion). So far, it rings true. Carrick wanted out, we sold him. Berbs will probably follow because of the same reasons.

The thing is, this system isn't working as effectively as Levy would have himself believe it is. Sometimes, you have to bite the bullet. You have to invest in a ready-made finished article player, even if it means paying a little more into his wage packet. Surely if you are willing to spend £16.5M on a striker, you can allow for the wage structure to cater for world-class signings. Petrov, apparently, was too much of a risk. Not risky enough for City to gamble on. And on current form, I would have loved to see him in a Spurs shirt. How is he any less of a risk than someone like Bent or Zokora? Or even Jenas?

The young players we do bring in, who could potentially be sold for more money doesn't actually improve the team in the present, does it? You can't have a team of potentially good players and no backbone of experience. Seems the mixture isn't quite right. Yes, it takes time to mould and once more we are at the start of a new regime. But if you look back over the last few years, you can't say any one of our young players has turned into a potential superstar. Some of them have flirted with the possibility, but delusions turned back into reality from where I stand in the Park Lane.

We've bought the likes of Kaboul and KPB - and their current lack of quality is telling. Lennon has turned to shit. Huddlestone still has plenty of work to do in order to improve his game....and so on. Could we get £8M for Jenas? Actually, we probably could considering the way money is thrown about nowadays. But when you turn around and pay £8M for Zokora, or possibly £8M for Hutton - the whole ethos of buying players that adhere to a certain set of criteria loses its reasoning.

Its typical Tottenham. Over complicating matters, trying to be far too clever.

It's simple. Buy the players that will improve the team and create stability and balance and help progress us forwards, fixing the issues that currently blight us. Maybe that's what Levy is aiming to do, and this 'myth' is simple creating arguments over what his masterplan is all about.

If Hutton is the answer to the RB position, then fair enough. £8M or £9M, probably isn't relevant to whether we could sell him for more 3 years from now. The more pressing matter would be to hold onto him long enough for the team to achieve success - because at this rate we appear to be buying players that Man Utd will pluck from us in the coming seasons.

So Levy does have sell-on value in mind - but not as the priority. And he is picky with the 'older' more expensive and experienced players. We obviously have money, so if they rate a player and believe the player will become 'great' then whether they steal him for 500K or buy him for £8M probably isn't too relevant in their eyes. Obviously, in 5 years time, if we haven't moved forward then Levy and his DoF system isn't working because the players they are purchasing are simply not fulfilling the potential they were initially bought for. And like I said, if the mixture isn't right, then he isn't bringing in the right players at the right time.

I don't think the masterplan is to simply buy for the sake of being able to sell the players on for profit. But he has shown weaknesses for improving the squad when it was necessary to do so (i.e. the season we sat in 4th for 4 months comes to mind.....where were the Jan Window transfers to consolidate 4th place beyond any doubt?) We could have done with some real world-beaters at that point in time.

As noted in the Solaar post, "...making us a consistent top-6 team would bring a hell of a lot more money into the club than buying and reselling youth players".

And yet we buy Gunter and (looking like) Hutton. An 18 year old and 23 year old. Sure, both are meant to be top drawer. But if he doesn't follow up with an experienced 'class' centre-back, then you have to start questioning the logic.

I'm beginning to repeat myself now.

In the past, Spurs have gone out and bought what they believed to be top players, for key positions. And they turned out to be miserable signings. I think trusting Ramos will help us in abundance.

It just seems that all we buy are 'kids' and sometimes we strike lucky (Berbatov). It's not enough.

EDIT:

Hutton has apparently rejected a move to Spurs. So, was this Tottenham's 'number one target' for the right-back position (considering we have already bought Gunter)? Who will they now move for? Another younger, less promising target? Rather than a quality experienced 26 year old?

And if we go on to sign a few players in this window, and not bring in another RB, way make out we needed one in the first place?

It just doesn't seem to make sense.

Singing from the same hymn sheet...

...isn't something we do at Spurs.

Dec 30th 2007

"Once again for the record, we are not a selling club, rather we are building for the future. When we have players on long contracts we have no need to entertain offers" - Daniel Levy

Jan 3rd 2008

"He is here now and unless somebody comes along with an offer that is too good to refuse, he will stay here and we are happy to have him" - Juande Ramos

'Bored with the Berbatov' t-shirts, anyone?

Levy: The Trilogy - Part III

THE DAZZA INTERVIEW

Dazza, over at Glory Glory got to bag 5 minutes with Daniel Levy. I’m some what disappointed that he didn’t let me know of the whereabouts and the time of the interview in advance. Not that I would have turned up and superglued myself to the chairman. No. It’s just nice to know where the chairman is on a day to day basis considering I pay his wages via my season ticket purchase season after season.

Here’s the interview.

http://www.glory-glory.co.uk/blogs/dazzalondon

And below, with comments.

Evening Mr Levy, thank you for sparing me some time on what is obviously a busy day.

DL – Yes, very busy............

Playing golf? Football Manager 2008? You get paid a cool million a year, I’m sure you can spare more than 5 minutes for one of the common people. Just hold your breath so you don’t have to breathe in the fumes of a ‘football fan’.

I’ll try and be as brief as I can then. I’ve taken a few questions from people on the website. Having read your EGM address I won’t be asking anything about the stadium or selling the club rumours.

How’s Juande’s English lesson’s going and how long before you reckon he’ll feel comfortable enough to do his own TV comments?

DL - I can sit and have a conversation with Juande and understand exactly what he’s saying but with interviews you are expected to reply quickly and he doesn’t want to be put in a position where he says the wrong thing that gets twisted. He’s probably a couple of months away from conducting his interviews.

As long as he understands ‘YOU’RE FIRED!’, right? Though its more likely he’ll be telling you in broken English to stick Comolli ‘uppa your arseo’.

Some fans are curious as to why you weren’t on screen during his initial press conference.

DL – Because if I had been the majority of the questions would have been about Martin Jol’s leaving as opposed to looking forward with Juande signing. Besides that’s the Sporting Directors job. The same reason as I wasn’t present during the unveiling of Martin and Frank Arnesen was.

Let’s correct this one.

‘Because I would have struggled to answer any of the questions posed because I handled the whole Jol affair like Pepe Le Pew on the pull’.

I saw the interview with Juande pre-match on Sky before the West Ham game and he seemed very non-committal regarding Berba’s future. Subtitles were – “Ask him”. Has his introduction had a settling affect on the squad with regards to being any closer to contract negotiations with Berba and Defoe? How much of a worry is it for you that Sky Andrew is Defoe’s agent after what he persuaded Sol to do?

DL – There aren’t any tensions in the squad. Berba is already on a long contract and he’s signalled he’s happy. As for Jermaine, he’s publicly stated he wants to stay and I reiterated in today’s EGM our wish that he does stay. Now it’s pretty much down to him. Sky Andrews – Draw your own conclusions.

Yes. You should have sold Defoe to Pompey way back. Instead, you sat back and watched a new Judas scenario develop. Not to worry. The club is bound to get it right third time round.

Do you ever ask for or get offered feedback from the players regarding the coach?

DL – I never ask for feedback but any I do get comes back via players agents rather than the players themselves.

Care to share what Sky Andrews may have said to you recently? Go on. I bet it was fruity.

What is the criteria for signing new players if the manager suggests them? Any truth in the tabloid gossip that 3 of Juande’s targets were disregarded because they were “over 26”?

DL – I can categorically say there is no truth in that rumour what-so-ever.

Agreed. Because we just over-spend on under-23’s instead.

Has there been any progress on the goal keeping coach position? Has anyone thought of offering Paul a trip to a clinical hypnotist to ease any self doubts he experiences and try and get him back to full confidence?

DL – There is no progress as yet. And if you saw Paul’s display against West Ham yesterday I think he had a good game and his confidence is there for people to see.

No, what’s there to be seen is that he still needs to shed some weight. His ‘saves’ at West Ham were alright, if a little bit overly ‘dramatic’ for the cameras to enjoy. Seeing a hypnotist isn’t that bad of an idea. How about using one on Jenas to trick him into believing he is a footballer.

Fan’s really don’t want to share with West Ham. The travel connections are even worse than WHL. Are there any truth to these rumours &/or alternatives should we have to move away from WHL for any rebuilding work?

DL – If we should, and I’m not saying we will, have to ground share at all then theoretically how would people feel about sharing with Arsenal. Which would they prefer?

That’s like asking if I’d prefer to share a bed with Michael Barrymore or take a skinny dip in his pool.

(Dazza's response) – Well I actually did an article on this, asking people to think with their head rather than their heart and you’d be surprised to percentage of people that said sharing the Emirates would be the preferable short term option with regards to increased capacity meaning more revenue and an increase in season tickets.

Stop kissing arse, Dazza. Referring to ‘revenue’ probably made Levy all giddy. I bet he smirked didn’t he? He licked his lips too, didn't he? Yeah, of course he did.

Have there been any “culprits” identified for these continuing leaks that appear to be coming from the club?

DL – We’ve investigated and found nothing. If you look at the way things transpired with Martin then it’s possible there was no leak. Firstly it was rumoured he’d resigned before the game, then that he’d been sacked at half time but no final decision was made until after the game. With regards to the leak about the ground expansion. I’m sure that came from somewhere other than the club. The reason why I’m so sure was that only a handful of people knew anything about that and most of them were from outside the club.

What? You mean there are no ‘In The Knows’ or club insiders working their magic, cryptically informing fans on forums with exclusives that have yet to hit the newsstands? No espionage? Just coincidence and enough shit thrown at the wall, some of it will stick? Damn it! I WANT TO BELIEVE!

Finally, on a personal note, do you have any spare tickets for the Anderlecht game that I can buy off of you, I’ve already booked my travel????

DL – (laughs) I’m afraid not.

Dazza, I’m disappointed. This is pretty much a stereotypical ‘last question’ to end the interview with a smile. Christ, you been watching Parkinson as prep? How about asking him about the crate in his basement with the Arsenal memorabilia? Or whether he has kept any of the effigies I’ve mailed him? Or why only the West Stand gets bagels? You’ve sold out man. You’ve sold out.

Well thank you very much for sparing me this time to answer questions. Good luck.

DL – You’re welcome

Good luck? Miracle more like.