Spurs 3 Wigan 1 Transfer Window 0

So we got what we wanted in the end.

I’m talking about the three points rather than the transfer market. More on that later. Firstly Wigan and it’s great to be able to look back at my preview of the game and bask in the fact that Spurs delivered with both professionalism and focus to brush the bottom club aside comfortable. Dominated possession, had a plenty of chances. Okay, so there were moments in the second half where we displayed questionable defending, going through the motions without much intent, but all things considered the result was never in doubt. Even if we switched off a little in the second forty five.

Wigan didn’t park the bus although they attempted to defend deep with emphasis on their back-line, waiting and building a sponge wall of protection to soak up the pressure. The opening goal the perfect illustration of them attempting to do so with every man behind the ball. But alas, Xavi found Messi with an absolute gem of a pass, so perfect it split an atom on its way through. Lio expected, wanted the pass and took it with confidence for the 1-0. A thing of beauty.

Second goal was also tasty. Fortunate how the ball came to be with Luka but his turn and shot was decisive and clinical. The third was majestic. Bale again into his favourite corner giving the keeper no chance. This was routine stuff, never really shifting out of third gear. Although I prefer not to concern myself with results elsewhere, results elsewhere proved to be kind to us. 13 points off 6th spot and 11 points away from 5th. Happy days. How to improve? Perhaps next time shift out of third gear and into first and torment and destroy.

A few highlights. Bale (the beast), could have, should have had a hat-trick. Loved some of his mazy runs. Modric was sexual. Harry getting love from the crowd. Lancaster on for his début. Kaboul enjoying the evening. Some downers include Rafa and Walker going off injured and Benny (very fortunate) not to be red-carded. Norty.

Now the supposedly tricky fixtures begin. Most of the games, IMO, are winnable. That’s if we line up with our strongest side. Which links this post-match musing into the transfer market review and the distortion the January window brings leaving many of us confused and bewildered when perhaps it’s not necessary to feel this way. But then maybe confusion is the only reaction to it.

The problem with Tottenham is that we are very finely tuned. We’re a top side when we field our very best line up. Such is the quality of the first team that if we lose a key player or two the entire shape of the side is affected, sometimes with ill-effect. Meaning we have to readjust our style and some fluidity is lost as a consequence. We don’t quite have like-for-like players when looking to replace. Lesser teams, they can chop and change and appear to be more comfortable in doing so without a massively detrimental knock-on to the way they approach every game. If we lose Bale and Lennon, we have no pace and no width. If Adebayor is out, then our movement up front and the way we attack has to change to work. We don’t have convincing depth in squad. It’s looked that way but only on paper and not when applied practically.

I’ve been an advocator for consolidation. Remember 2006? We didn’t make any major changes in the Jan window and that might have been costly. Okay, so losing points in the final minutes of games cost us, but still...we could have strengthened. Make an outlay, speculate to accumulate. Take a risk but one that shortens the odds substantially meaning the risk equates to ‘guaranteeing’ the target (say top four). Nothing is guaranteed, but if you make powerful changes to personnel then positives should shine through with very few negatives interfering. So, my thinking was that looking at the squad...at our team...and taking into account that an injury or two would seriously impede us then the logical thing would be to sign quality long term players rather than spend less on short term solutions. We did neither in this window. Why?

I guess we never learn. Take away the opportunistic signing (a van der Vaart) we are left with the mundane but required exercise of balancing the books. We have unhappy players, players that aren’t even fringe or backup as they are hardly called upon. Now this might be an irritant of lack of squad rotation or the fact that they are simply not required at all. The other factor is, the players in question want to play first team football on a regular basis. Hence the unhappiness. Hence the necessity to move them on (unless your name is dos Santos).

So we have:

Pav – He’s never quite fitted in. Supremely lazy and at times lacking any on-field intelligence, he stuttered too often and could never quite claim a first team place. Not his fault. We should never have signed him in the first place. If it was ever going to work he would have had to be first choice from the start. He wasn’t. At times he displayed technical brilliance. A scorer of great goals. In 2010 (when we finished 4^th) he scored important goals for us. But he’s always been distant, always a misfit. Always apologetic. Please don’t disagree and suggest we were not expecting him to move on. It’s taken how many windows for this to finally happen? £11M isn’t too bad either.

Bassong – Another player simply not fancied. A shame because he wasn’t that bad at all when he first arrived here. Confidence and lack of game time can knock you. He’s also too far down the pecking order so it makes sense to shift him on so he can get some game time in.

Pienaar – I did my best to give him the benefit of the doubt. He’s a fairly non-descript type of player. Can deputise in a couple of positions but isn’t truly a direct replacement for anyone we have. It’s now easy for me to question the ethics behind signing him in the first place when again he was not used often enough (injuries aside). If you’re going to play the squad game, then you have to look at resting/protecting players effectively and allowing the likes of Pienaar game time. Harry doesn’t tinker unless injuries force him too. This signing has proven to be a redundant one.

Corluka – Walker (from what I know at the time of writing) is fine. But if he gets injured – we have no genuine right-back cover as our ‘kids’ are out on loan. Now if it was me, I’d keep Charlie. Even if there was the potential of him playing only twice between now and the end of the season. The player though, he probably would not find that acceptable. Which is why he’s been loaned out.

Have we weakened the squad? Yes, but we’ve not weakened the first team and all the players that have left in this window are neither key or overly called upon to wear the shirt. These are players that had to move on.

The fundamental problem with January is that this is not the month where you traditionally sign super-star players (keep ignoring the opportunistic signings). End of season, the summer...that’s when players/agents/clubs begin to play ball because it’s easier to sell and buy and build your squad for the next season. This is where it gets distorted and contradictory. We don’t know and can only guess what Levy is planning for. Whether it has something to do with Harry and the court case/England job and waiting for the summer to finance big money deals, it’s tricky to work out without being a fly on the wall.

Now you could cite the fact we bid around £20M (or so) for Remy and had it rejected and that its proof that we:

a)     Have the money to spend and the inclination to do so

b)     We are thinking long term regardless of potential managerial upheaval

c)     We are aware of the type of quality we need and we are looking to bring it in

Now c) might require a caveat that outlines we have very specific targets we wish to splash the money on and will not sign lesser targets (for less money, say £6M-£10M) as a stop-gap/panic buys simply for the sake of consolidation. Money is tight, the NDP is on the horizon. It looks like we have it to spend but we’re not going to repeat mistakes of old.

It’s frustrating when you consider we haven’t actually bought a striker out-right for a while. In the summer, Defoe is the only player we’ll have (unless Adebayor is signed permanently). So there’s no doubt we need a massive signing in that department, regardless of Ade remaining here beyond the summer. Could we do with that signing now? Yes, we could have done with him before the window closed. Because we’re 3^rd and because mathematically, 1^st is still not beyond us (humour me). We also cannot afford to drop out of the top four. I don’t believe we will, and I guess that’s the crux of it. Levy and Harry believe this to be the case also because faith is being placed in the risk that consolidation of our position is not imperative. We were not expected to be in this position at the start of the season and have done so off the back of signing a 40 year old keeper and the much maligned (and now loved) Scott Parker.

We should still be aiming higher for sure. Strengthening our current stature. But there you go. We tried. And cheaper less quality driven alternatives do not appear to be options when looking to splash the cash.

Krasic, according to reports, was more than an option. We wanted him on loan. Juventus agreed to it. The player didn’t, preferring a more permanent role. He would have covered off the flank, another one of those consolidation question marks. Players in the Prem that we considered viable alternatives might have been too pricey to follow through on. How many times have we been burnt in the past? Too many.

So, all I have left is the fact that we must be aiming high. It’s frustrating. It’s a harsh reality. But if clubs won’t let the players leave then you’re going to be hitting that brick wall over and over again. In the summer just past, I was told a story about Gervinho, the Arsenal striker. We were interested. He didn’t fancy us. That turned out rather well. I think the lesson to be learnt is we have to be decisive and certain. Unequivocally. I think the club know the players we want and won’t look elsewhere and we’ll have to go back in for them again. What we have to hope for is that we have enough about us (and luck) to see the season through to be in a position to attract. And when we do attract we attract the very best.

Saha and Ryan Nelsen are nothing more than replacements for back-ups. They are not there to strengthen the first team but rather make sure we have cover if cover is called upon. Saha is on a short term contract. He can hold the ball up, protect it and fit into the style of football we play presumably as an impact sub at best. Nelsen is a curious one. Free-agent, nothing more than an experienced footballer that fits into the role Bassong had on the sidelines. Samba might have been the first choice target but if Blackburn wish to hold onto their player and price him out of a move, well, we of all clubs can’t complain about that stance. Also Caulker will be with us next season. We can’t over spend for the sake of the short term. One thing of note here worth mentioning. All this ridicules the signing of Khumalo.

I know. Its underwhelming because the window distorts expectancy and everyone feels disappointed when a big signing isn’t made. Again, I’m going to refer back to consolidation. We haven’t achieved this. It’s the way it’s played out. The players will need to dig deep and we’ll have to cope with injuries. I felt underwhelmed during the summer and the start of the season, but this run and our form has proven that faith in both manager and chairman has to be respected. Benefit of the doubt. I can’t spend time wasting it on complaining when the team need me to support them. Regrets, they only come into play after the fact if we’ve failed. Something I do not wish to entertain.

Simply put. If we claim Champions League, then this summer there will be no margin for error or indecisiveness. We’ll need top drawer, dare I say, world class signings. Not for consolidation but for stepping up to the next level and to be able to retain the new founded stature.

Until then, the window is shut. No draft, and the temperature is about to rise.

We are Tottenham. We're third, five points off the top of the table. Believe.

Daring is achieving. Love the shirt.

Saha

@philmcnulty: Louis Saha from Everton to Spurs now looking a done deal. Really intriguing move that. #bbcfootball

So today Marseille president Vincent Labrune confirmed he turned down an £18m bid from Tottenham for striker Remy earlier this month. So if true, we look to have the money to spend and the desire to do so. But if this Saha story unfolds into reality and is confirmed then you have to scratch your head and wonder whether the targets we have (that fall into the £15M + category) are few and far between. No chance of a massive signing happening on the last day when selling clubs always enjoy hiking up prices for their star players and forcing a game of cat and mouse that tends to play better across a few days. So Saha, would be a stop gap (on loan). Not bad business if you forget about his proneness to injuries. And if you ignore his 1 goal to 50 shots ratio.

Saha is a deadline day type of signing. Is/can be a quality player. But those injuries...

I'm hoping (praying) this is masterful deflection. If not, and he arrives then perhaps this is finally goodbye to Roman.

Jim White's head to explode-o-meter: Steam out of nose and ears, veins popping in forehead. 

It's not going to happen, is it?

Tuesday will be manic. Deadline transfer day. If you're Harry Redknapp, there's plenty of movement from court room to White Hart Lane and then a potential post-match pizza with the chairman whilst we try to tie up several deals before the 11pm deadline. Following on from three points against Wigan of course, which would probably be the most vital of captures made on the last day of January.

In a world of fantasy, where consolidation rains down from the heavens we'll be negotiating for a centre-back (does Khumalo still exist?), a right-winger who can drift in centrally when applicable to tactical reshuffles (we lack width when first team flankers are missing) and also a new forward to complement Adebayor and Defoe (with Roman leaving the club to make way for the new arrival).

We've got room to squeeze all that in haven't we? Harry might even get home in time to walk the dog.

Signing the Milky Bar Kid doesn't count.

It's the 30th of the month. Carroll (Derby) and Bostock (Wednesday) have gone out on loan. And that's just about it. Hand on heart, the apocalypse is more likely before we see dos Santos and friends leave the Lodge (friends being the likes of Bassong and anyone else you believe to be surplus to requirements).

We've spoken about the necessity to bolster the squad to make sure there's that extra bit of something in there to spark us through the month of February, yet reality also lays the smack down and reminds us that pragmatics are far more forthcoming. Harry and his uncertain future might be effecting our transfer strategy. The chairman might prefer to take a gamble on what we've got, to avoid making any knee-jerk signings. Although quite how signing another forward would constitute a knee-jerk I don't know. What I do know is, there appears to be a complete lack of tangible targets if you wish to listen to the rumours.

If anything happens, it will either be a wonderful surprise to those nervously biting their nails anxious and desperate for something, anything to play out. Or we're in for another moment of golden opportunistic transfer genius. Possibly signing Cuthbert van der Vaart, Rafa's lesser known brother who also plays in the hole behind the lone forward but unlike his famous sibling can't last up to the 70th minute mark and has to be subbed around the 55th minute due to a phobia of the number sixty and his subsequent narcoleptic condition.

In the mean time Sky Sports News are panicking massively as they attempt to work out how best to get a cheeky update interview from Harry on potential transfers as there is zero chance of anyone being anywhere near the Lodge due to the game at the lane. A drivers seat window can hardly be fitted into the Spurs dugout. Of course, what with the game falling on the 31st of Jan we might find ourselves marvelling at a new signing taking to the field at half time, announced over the tannoy or better still via Levy with mic from the directors box presenting the return of Jonathan Blondel.

Best to just concern ourselves with the football. Wigan. Bottom of the table. They have been utterly smashed about in recent weeks. Let's respect the trend. With the disappoints of recent weeks, it's time to saddle up and ride momentum with a nifty gallop and scream. We've got a sunset to get to.

COYS.

New look Spurs, same old Gio

Gio

What a shocker. Apparently we've priced Gio out of a move to Sevilla. It's the story of every transfer window since the young Mexican signed for us. Beginning to think there is no way out of the club for him. Like Steve McQueen, he's caught in the barb-wire. Doesn't matter how many times you re-wind, he's never going to make it. We signed him for what, £4.7M? The Spanish club claim we want a exorbitant amount. Ten games, two goals. In four years. Levy mathematics deem him to have gained value rather than lose any. He's twenty-two. I've stuck a fiver on him finally making a move away by the time he makes his fifteenth appearance for us, at the grand age of forty two.

New Spurs site

Is it finished? Doesn't look finished, but it's live. Still propagating perhaps. Content looks the same, no revolutionary new features (I might have missed them) so it's pretty much a cosmetic touch up we've got. Plenty of white and player images as backdrops which is fine with me although could do with more consistency in how they're used. The new-look profiles (I guess that's revolutionary) gave me a scare when Bentley and Jenas stared back at me all proud in Lilywhite. Continuity error there. It is an improvement on the last site but it's a shame the club didn't look at perhaps truly redefining the platform in its entirety.

I guess the main crux for most will be the account management for season ticket holders and purchasing tickets on-line. Probably the main reasons for using the site. Best to wait until tomorrow whilst they sort out the problems with logging in (I can't seem to do so at the moment). Will say this, the more you browse around it, the better UI experience it is compared to the one it's replaced. But still, the layout is not as crisp and clean as it could be. Just don't expect to have your mind blown. There is also no Man City tunnel-cam feature, probably best to avoid the legalities and embarrassment that Chirpy will cause when he's caught smoking crack at half-time. Allegedly.

Gareth Bale

Fantastic player. Still a kid. But an absolute beast of a player. Enjoy whilst we have him playing in our colours rather than bemoan his evolution because you think football is straight forward and obvious. Just wanted to reiterate what I said in the post-City write up.

That's all I've got.

Sunflower and birthday cake

Afternoon.

I've just about recovered from a week of torrid insomnia and it's main catalyst, acute Bronchitis, to find myself back on-line but it would appear with very little to share. Nothing cute about it. I think it's fair to say most of us are still reflecting on the City game. Still seems impossible, within the context of how the game played out in the second half, that fate managed to re-script the narrative with such a harsh finale. But then a score-draw would have lacked the brutal punch of certainty. In this case, it's certain we've (once more) been written out of the race. Which is all good. Much prefer us in the backdrop of 3rd place with less pressure on us leaving behind the hefty superlatives the media have blessed us with recently.

I still fancy us to push for 2nd spot. Although its more appropriate to now take one game at a time. Talking of which; the FA Cup. Friday evening. That's a fairly new one on me. Not the best of kick-off times. Means Sky+ will be used whilst I pretend to show interest in Eastenders and avoid all social media until I start playing catch-up.

Watford away. Cue re-runs of that majestic piece of genius from Hoddle. We should win this one comfortably. We need to want to win it comfortably just to get back to winning ways and also because there won't be any harm complementing our CL push with a proper old fashion cup run. Redknapp has taken us to the semi-final before. We failed to show up that day. Don't know how many times I've said it but we were once synonymous with this competition. Now it's just a distant memory. So, make it so Spurs.

The transfer window is still open. You might have forgotten all about it. Although doubtful thanks to the daily routine of re-reading the same football agent rhetoric that's used to attempt to drum up interest in players looking to leave/arrive. I stopped watching Sky Sports News a while back. Although on deadline day, I'm sure to tune in just to watch the almost Chris Morrisesque 'The Day Today' qualities of their newsroom as they go round the training grounds and stadiums of England to show us reporters standing outside waiting for a car to pull in or out so they can confirm 'something must be happening'. Exciting. It never fails to amuse. Looking forward to Jim White turning up, with CCTV showing him parking up and walking towards the lift whilst checking his Blackberry for ITK.

We're being teased that Gio is finally on his way, which means someone has agreed to pay us the £40M that Levy has quoted for the ex-Barca player. Pav is still with us. He is right? Of course he is. You know that because of the daily reminder of him wanting to leave. Think I read we extended his contract to drive up the asking price. And you wonder why he's still here. As for players in? The latest from the ITK community is: Sunflower. Yes, you read that right. Another ambiguous cryptic clue that tells you nothing but can probably explain a dozen potential names in the aftermath of anyone signing.

Harry is relatively busy at the moment so not sure if he's going to be available for late night pizza as the clock edges towards midnight on the fateful last day. This ambition I have for consolidation. Considering we are less than a week away from the window closing, you would expect that any major signing(s) we are planning must have plans afoot already for the deal(s) to be plausible. And if so, the fact no media outlet or message board teenager is sharing suggests nobody other than the chairman is aware of it. Which is always the way. That or nothing is afoot and we might be left with hoping (despairing) for another opportunistic super-signing in the dying moments. Oh the joys will be upon us soon.

As for the court case. It all sounds doom and gloom. Would do because its the prosecutions job to make it sound just that. Defence will level it out. Not even sure how important any of this is, in terms of the short term and long term. I'm not worried. At all. Also, if you're wondering...my one is spurs61.

Happy birthday to Bill Nicholson (RIP you grand legend of a giant of a man). Also HAGO to Jose Mourinho who appears to be a popular talking point to some who have already began to legislate for a new Spurs manager. Can I remind everyone of The Special One's style of football and his managerial traits and then ask you to compare them to the manager we currently have. Jose, he's a winner, but he's a winner at a cost. Both to the transfer budget required to support his efforts and the ethos of the shirt. Also, if you don't like Harry and his ego-brand protecting I hate to imagine what you'd make of Jose and his delightfully pleasant personality and relationship building skills. All this is simply hypothetical, just for discussion points.

Talking of the Special One. Happy birthday to me. I'm in great company. A thank you to Tottenham for the birthday card sent and the subliminal message it included by way of having Darren Anderton's name and shirt visible on the back. Very poignant to include 'Sicknote' in a message to me on what ought to be a day of celebration. Is that a gentle reminder of what might happen if I fall out of line again, Mr Chairman? I know you're watching. You're always watching.

#saynotostratford

I ain't scared of you.

Schrödinger's cat, done and dusted, don't shoot the messenger

Soz, sick. Hence lack of exuberant blogging this past week. Trying to ease my way to a Spurs v City preview.

Wolves

Looking back at this game, the fact we had to dig deep to equalise and almost went on to win the game...it should not be discounted. I know its still easy to claim its two points dropped but let's wait and see if that's still the case at the end of the season. You'd rather win on Sunday after a draw than beat Wolves then lose at Eastlands, right? Three points is just the three points no matter the opposition, but three points away to City would be worth so much more. The Wolves point might end up being the difference when it's all done and dusted. You know you've been in a war when you can look back at the hard fought battles. A point isn't quite a victory but its hardly the flag of surrender.

Them lot down the road

Avoided the glamour of trolling and attempted to debate the North London state of mind over at the White Hart Pain blog that looked at the trainstion of power (shift) from red to white. Comments section included this from a gooner:

Calm down mate, its January. For a “power Shift” to come about, you would need to finish above Arsenal for many seasons, not just. Next year normal service will be resumed.

I responded with this:

Er…no we don’t. All we need to do is finish about Arsenal the once. The problem you chaps down the road have is you’re not letting go of this fallacy that you’re still a great club. You’ve stagnated badly. Okay, so badly is pretty much defined as still being able to qualify for the CL every season but is that going to be your legacy, your gloat? 15 times on the trot?

Let go of it. Then you might be able to start a new era and move on rather than continue to drown in superlatives that are no longer relevant.

Wenger, came to Arsenal (a blank canvas) and pretty much created a club from his vision. Wenger is pretty much Arsenal. Much like Arsenal fans (most of them) seem to echo the delusions of the manager and part and parcel the same happens with the players.

You once had full rights to be arrogant pricks about it, but take a look around. This is no longer the Prem dominated by the Sky Sports Top four. No matter how much it hurts, its all changed. For the best. You think any club stood a chance during that period of time? Spurs included, we could hardly mount a challenge. Now we can. And its not just because everybody else has dropped off the pace, its because we’ve organically grown and evolved. Stick RvP into the Spurs side and we’d probably win the league (okay, City would still probably edge us out) but Christ…when in the last 10 years has anyone been able to speak about Spurs like this?

The foundations are set. Up to us to push on with it. To be honest, sadly, many gooners would not sit down and debate this. Because many refuse to accept weakness and doubt. They once cited the presence whereas all they do now is remind us of the past when the reality is, the future is there to be made.

But hey, I guess we haven’t got Frimpong denching it across Twitter so we’ve still got a fair amount of ground to cover before we turn into twats.

As for normal service? Is that what Arsenal are these days? Just the rivals of Tottenham Hotspur? It's like we're back in the 1980s again.

I welcome our 'neighbours' to better themselves because it would mean so much more to finish above them when they claim to be superior and at their best.

ITK and the transfer window

There was a time when I would spend the entirety of January trolling the ITK community and mocking the ones that worshipped along with the ones that claimed to have inside information. After almost five years of revelling in this traditional internet dance, I think I've entered a state of semi-retirement. I can't be alone in thinking this window is more so overwhelming than prior ones. Firstly, we don't tend to do that much business and the only type of business that can be embraced as exciting is the opportunistic dealings that Levy is (in)famous for (i.e. van der Vaart).

I don't really want to hear dressed up BS about why the Samba deal is stalling. We all know he's a prospective transfer target. Whoop-de-do. Other targets are taken from the small pool of players we're likely to be interested in based on the fact that we need a centre-back/midfield or winger/forward. If there are say twenty players out there that fit the bill, it's hardly rocket science to work out the potentials. Then we move ever closer to the last day of the window with everyone panicking that no new players will surely spell the end of our season. It's like being a kid and going to a toy store expecting to buy something and you end up coming away with either nothing or a crap toy you didn't really want but just had to get to make the visit worth while. Then you get home and look at the toys you already have and realise you're spoilt rotten.

As for the ITK's themselves, I've been following this thread (for larfs) but hardly paying that much attention to it. Schrödinger's cat would frown. There's can't be twenty or so separate claims of having contact with someone involved in the club. Similarly, we can't be involved in so many prospective dealings at once. It all remains reactive any ways these days. Where's Harry? He's in France. Cue player(s) he is scouting with additional info on likelihood of happening. Yawn. If there are only a few players then the twenty seperate 'leaks' seems to have their own perspective on what's happening. And if nothing is happening then we're blessed with a variety of information on the clubs transfer policy.

ITK's = the internet version of the backpage of The Sun

I've never shared this, but someone (who reads this blog) worked in the business. He's publicised that himself. Hey, he could be telling fibs for all I know (insert smiley here) but the info he did share was always of interest although not always Spurs related. You're more likely to get said info from football agents and the clubs looking to sell/off-load. The wonderful irony is that there are so many political plays and bluffing that it remains difficult to truly know what is happening until it happens. And surely that's all that matters; Player, outside The Lodge, holding up the shirt. I found this to be the case with the info shared. Genuine information...is it still genuine if it's ambiguous? I guess that's why I refuse to get all angry about the ITK's. Wouldn't go as far as offering them an olive branch though. More so the idiots that protect them like some melting pot of a cult.

Oh look. I've gone and repeated myself with all this when I promised myself I wouldn't. Slow news day. In the mean time, 1001 other football websites will boost their click-thru average and earn some pennies for the meter but sharing the same old churned out stories that seem to never go away. We'll have to wait and see if Levy aims to please us or retains a calm composed pragmatical approach (which would equally be pleasing if we improve squad depth).

Do think we need to shift players out first. Perhaps the chairman needs to drop the valuations down a little to do that. Surely we need to be paying someone to take Gio off our hands? Can Faces not sign him as the 'Face of Faces'? I'm sure Ledley wouldn't mind.

Special speculation

Five days into the January transfer window and it's started. Rumours, whispers, suggestions. The WBA game and the hectic Xmas and NY period proved more or less the importance of rotation and resting players. We have to be in a position to do that without detrimental effects on the team.

My personal mantra remains the same:

We need to bring in couple of players, ideally though that cover should be competition for the players in the squad already. So we should look to sign quality players that are long term and not just short term. If one of them happens to fit the 'special' bill, then that does me just fine and it will elevate us further forwards. But in terms of reality, that 'special' big name signing doesn't quite fit into the sides dynamics if you consider our current first team if all fit and well.

Midfield wise, we've got star quality. Signing a major player for a key midfield role, it's hardly pragmatic. Although the more astute might point out that Levy did just that with Rafa van der Vaart when he was not the type of player we actually needed at the time. That was supremely opportunistic and it was a risk, one that worked at the time and one that did shift us up a level performance wise.

Up front we have Adebayor. On loan. So if we do sign a striker for plenty of £££ then I'd expect our loanee to return to Eastlands in the summer. Any new signing in this position that is not a young hungry player willing to play second fiddle, will want more game time and although Adebayor is in need or a rest we can't keep him + two other forwards content (not forgetting Pav).

Then there's centre-backs. I've ever so slightly changed my opinion on this. Signing one will give us more than ample cover at the back (with Dawson, Gallas, Kaboul) what with King and his cameos. If any of the aforementioned three pick up knocks (Gallas already has) then its too much of a risk to ignore not signing someone. It will also allow us to play Kaboul at right-back to cover Walker (if Corluka goes or is simply no longer fancied). Not ideal having him deputise at RB, but its an option. It does look congested with that extra CB. So again, it has to be a long term signing if it happens and not simply 'cover'.

edit: not forgetting Bassong. Or forgetting him if you so wish.

I guess, what with our position in the league, we can't hope we muddle through Jan/Feb without any further knocks. Hence the importance of getting in players that will improve the squad in key positions and inspire competition. Again (repeating myself now) its dependent on how much money Daniel Levy is willing to spend this window.

The right-wing can do with some injection of new blood. A three-tier player will do. That's an attacking midfielder that can play wide and either just behind the main forward (van der Vaart role) or further forward. To find such quality though, it's a big ask. Which is why we're being continually linked with Junior Hoilett. But again, Harry might be okay to simply push Rafa out there (which is never a good thing), much like pushing Luka to the right.

Huddlestone has stated he's back 'running' in the next week or so. Sandro is out with a calf injury. Parker is injured (not too seriously) and was in a dire need of a rest prior to that. I feel Harry will stick with Livermore to cover the midfield unless there's a better quality player who can be signed. Rodwell is being linked. It would have to be someone similar. Young, willing to be patient. Because once Parker is 100% and Sandro is fit, then its the midfield's turn to be congested.

I'm not even going to consider the consequences of losing Luka to injury. Or Bale.

Perhaps that special player will do after all.

Check out the monster ITK thread over on the forum. I prefer to stay clear of it, but you might want to keep track of all the tittle tattle.

Listen out for the latest episode of The Fighting Cock podcast where we discuss the Jan transfer window. Available on Friday via itunes and on the FC website.

Ideal targets?

I wrote the linked article below a few weeks back and if you've read my last blog you'll note I've change my mind in terms of transfer target expectancy (especially with the centre-back position).

Click on the above image to see the article. I'm being a little wishful with two of the three ideal transfer targets. Although I still firmly believe we need cover for the flank and a forward. Just don't think we'll be looking at tens of millions of pounds in new signatures.

Sweepstake time. Name three potential signings this window (limit it to three targets otherwise you'll be as bad as any ITK sharing inside info).

The winner gets to gloat.

The window is open. Can you not feel the draft?

So it’s already started. The rumours and whispers  and the regurgitated transfer ramblings. The window is open. If only we could all jump out of it. Doesn’t quite work like that though and as I sit here ever so slightly on the edge of hypocrisy ,as much as I enjoy laughing at the media/Harry Redknapp and the ITK community, I obviously (deep down) don’t mind it as it tends to elevate an otherwise distracting month of irreverent chit chat. We all live in hope Jim White’s head WILL explode. One day, soon.

Mathematicians will obviously point to the fact that there is only a small group of high profile players that we’d potentially be able to sign. The unknown quantity are scouted players completely under the radar which usually don’t get highlighted by those privy to inside info because they don’t truly have access to said info. It’s far easier to suggest signing someone ‘famous’ especially someone who has been linked before. You know how it works. It’s the same formula the back page tabloids enjoy printing.

Once in a while, sure, someone does get it right. Mostly when the deal has practically been concluded and Levy and co can’t stop info from being leaked and hardly care at that point in time. Usually know, no one has a clue until the club tells us. So we populate the time with all the fun and games, the playa hating and the name calling.

I won’t be copying and pasting info this time. It’s out there, it’s easy to find and considering how disparaging I can be towards all the worshipping and the God complex that’s synonymous with it I’m hardly going to share cheap headlines just for the traffic when the info is pretty much irrelevant until said player is paraded in Lilywhite.

So instead I’m going to make logical predictions (will leave the names blank for you lot to discuss) based on nothing more than hope.

We’ve been obsessed with centre-backs. Cahill could have signed for us in the last window. Samba is always a popular and obvious player that gets linked. But then when you note the return of Dawson and add Kaboul, Gallas and the part-time King to the list you start considering the possibility that no new defensive rock will join this window. Perhaps in the next one when Gallas (probably) departs and question marks remain with Ledley’s longevity. Then there’s Caulker, the one for the future that might be part of the first team next season depending on who the manager is at the start of 2013.

It’s more likely that defenders will leave, although we half expected that last time out and it didn’t happen. Bassong probably needs to escape for his own sanity. Corluka? We have to hold onto to cover the right-back position otherwise if Walker is out for x amount of time then Kaboul will have to deputise there and depending on our centre-back situation it could get messy.

The philosophy here ideally should be think long term because long term will aid the short term. Economically (finances and squad size) I’m unclear how Levy plans to work this what with Redknapp’s future uncertain depending on how much you read into outside of Spurs distractions. Hopefully the chairman will appreciate we’re in a position where we need to consolidate and leave nothing to risk, what with the opportunity we find presented to us (top 3, game in hand, potential to push on further).

The midfield is key. Outside of transfers, Harry has to make sure he doesn’t burn out the likes of Parker. We’ve had to adapt and mix it up with the formation in recent games. With Kranjcar out in the cold and Lennon injured (on way back) either we start using Niko (even as an impact sub) or we look to bring in someone young, hungry and happy to play patiently as cover for the flanks. That’s either going to be someone in the Prem from a mid-table to bottom side that’s impressed thus far this season or a player from the continent that perhaps will escape the newsfeeds until it actually happens. Can you think of any high profile players you’d want? Considering high-profile might equate to Lennon ending up as the cover.

Pienaar doesn’t appear to be fancied much (where does he play exactly?). How Giovani remains perpetually linked to a move away without every appearing to make that move possible, irks me. Townsend has gone to Leeds on loan, so you hope there’s more than a suggestion that the club are not going to ‘wing it’ where this is concerned and cross their fingers. We can all see the detrimental impact of not having Lennon available to us. Although it’s allowed us to re-shape and work towards a tangible plan b.

The forward conundrum is far more complex because of the Adebayor loan deal. If we’re going to sign him permanently then money has to be placed aside. I doubt anything will happen in Jan. I hope it doesn’t mainly because it will force the player to continue to work hard (and avoid comfort). Although I’ve been impressed with his words as much as his work ethic (less so for his first touch). Again, politics might mean he doesn’t sign at all and returns to City (then onwards to Italy) in the summer. If Harry is no longer with us, the next man in charge might look elsewhere. Meaning that’s where the big money will be spent.

Pretty much irrelevant from my perspective as a fan though. Harry is the manager, he’s still the manager and we need to be decisive and completely confident in the squad we have post-Jan.

And so begins the second guessing. If the right player *is* available now and that player has the world class about him then regardless of the future, if its right for Spurs he should be signed.

Fact is, we have three forwards. Only one of them gets to play consistently. Pavlyuchenko is the one that needs to leave as he remains surplus and mostly unimpressive. Frustrating, as he’s technically a great finisher but usually a lazy unintelligent individual who doesn’t quite fit in when it matters. Cameos are not enough to retain his services. So based on that, we should be looking for someone to come in. If Levy isn’t willing to spend the masses of millions then much like the flank cover, we’ll look to be shrewd but sign someone with experience (rather than a young player who would be too great a risk, especially if Adebayor got injured).

Knock yourselves out guessing who that player might be. There are several touted ‘big name’ players who fit the bill. One or two less glamorous ones already plying their trade in England. Interestingly we’ve (ITK’s, the media and more importantly the fans) have moved on from waiting for a fully fledged La Liga superstar to sign. We are hardly going to sign someone that will demand to play ahead of Adebayor. Would make little sense.

Those that chose to be critical of Adebayor need to also appreciate he too was a shrewd signing. Experienced Prem player with something to prove. No big fee paid, percentage of wage the only damage. Roman’s ‘departure’ is key here. If he doesn’t leave then can’t see us signing anyone up front. Don’t see how manager and chairman could validate such a move (although it’s more than obvious Harry wants rid of the Russian).

The gaffer cites that ‘special player’. No doubting a goal-scorer would be the ideal special player he’d like to make part of the squad. But then trying to decipher whether this is another deflection sound-bite or Harry letting us know subtly nothing will happen is again...anyone’s guess.

I’ll be made up with a midfielder. Perhaps one that can play wide but also do a job where Rafa plays behind Adebayor – meaning we cover two positions. I’ll be made up if we make it a double signing with a forward to retain a cutting edge if others pick up knocks.

One thing is for certain. Regardless of the necessity we all seem to share in wanting to know what player the club are working towards signing (if any) if it happens it makes no difference if you knew about it before the official announcement.

In an ideal world, we won’t be asking the above questions on the final day of the window because we’ll have concluded our business some time before. We are much more likely to see Sky Sports News reporters interviewing Harry (through his car window) every twenty minutes as he drives in and out of the Lodge car park to get as much air time as possible.

Hello. Remember me?

It's been a fair few days since I last blogged. I've spent past International Breaks drafting and crafting articles to amuse and entertain whilst waiting to welcome back Spurs. Can't say I've been that inspired this past week. Less so for the sake of keeping up appearances. I apologise for that. It's not like there hasn't been any worthy points of discussion.

Spurs spy

The whole Olympic Stadium debacle can be summed up as follows:

"We're going to hide our bullshit by covering it up with your bullshit"

"That's what we're going to do"

That's basically it. Since when has anything not been susceptible to corruption? 14-0 suggests something in the bidding process was shady, not that I'm complaining personally being pro-NDP. Politics and business, dirty tricks and deflections...are we shocked? End of the day, we're not moving to East London and Gold and Sullivan are going to remain despondent (running track) even if Brady continues to churn out propaganda about 60k+ West Ham fans turning up at Stratford.

Whether Levy took it too far or not remains to be seen.

Boris ITK

A regular of Glory Glory dot co dot uk had a conversation with Boris Johnson. He shared the main discussion points on the forum, with photograph included. No cryptics. Spurs annual report out soon so we might see an update on where the NDP stands with the government. The main jist of the ITK:

An offer of £7.5m has been tabled to Tottenham Hotspur, from the Mayors office to help with regenerating the area and jobs if they stay in the area.
A new station will be built in close proximity to help with congestion.
Daniel Levy is being very stubborn apparently!

Not sure about that figure quoted (hence stubborn chairman I guess) but would dearly hope and pray the new station becomes a reality.

N17 > the sheer volume of people in and around Stratford station on a weekend

Gazza

Did you manage to catch the Paul Gascoigne interview? Ignoring the host, I tuned in regardless. Gazza was the player I idolised when growing up. Even before he signed for us, I was a tad obsessed. Powerful, mesmerising and a genuine personality back when football was football, before it started to self-mutilate. You can cite sadness and tragedy and pity but I prefer to remember his time at Spurs and 1991 in particular when he practically dragged us screaming (with joy) to Wembley before self-imploding on his second visit. He hasn't had a drink for a while, hope he never has one again. Fake breasts practical jokes aside, they don't make footballers like him any more.

I love you Paul.

England

Discussed this on Twitter, I just don't get that emotive kick out of watching England any more. It's not that I'm not patriotic or not proud, just there's a lack of spark and no excitement when we take to the field. Other than perhaps crossing fingers that Scott Parker doesn't get injured. Italia '90; every time I see flashbacks to it, hairs stand on the back of my neck. Euro '96 too. I don't know, perhaps modern football has left me a little disillusioned thanks to my dislike of so many of our untouchable internationals. There is so much wrong with the whole England set-up from grass roots to the FA and the media that I have some how managed to marginalise myself.

The media have always built us up to knock us down and perhaps as underdogs we'll perform better (England Expects no more) but there's a sense that club football has surpassed national aspirations. For me at least. Once upon a time had you asked me 'World Cup or Spurs title win?' - I would have struggled to answer it. I probably need to go away and think about this in more detail because I know it seems like I'm abandoning my country but I'm not doing so because we're 'not that great' or always under-achieve. I'm seasoned at disappointment, considering what the 1990s were made of supporting Spurs. Even under Graham and the pre-Jol 'era' before Martin rebooted us, I never considered turning my back on my club.

Why have I allowed myself to turn my back ever so slightly on my country?

Death and taxes

Jan trial for Harry. No surprise there. Either they're p*ssing in the wind or have more than enough evidence to make an example out of him. Will be embarrassing (considering how high profile Redknapp is) for the HMRC to go to court only to see the case thrown out or found in favour of England's next manager©. Harry has always been confident, laughing it off. Bravado I'm sure. Fact is, I can't influence or change anything relating to this court case and anyone associated with the club (manager, coach, player, whatever) are simply custodians of the shirt I adore. Daniel Levy appointed him and it has worked a treat. We have stability and we have swagger. Regardless of what happens (he could be found innocent of any wrong-doing, he could be found guilty, he could be found guilty and be sentenced, etc) and whether he is with us next season or not, the club will still be looking forwards. Levy, no doubt, has had contingency plans drafted for months and months.

And let's be honest. This is THFC. It wouldn't be THFC if there was no drama unrelated to football at some point.

The window; can you feel the draft?

Bale to Barca. I'm sure I saw a few 'headlines' covering this. That's the Jan transfer window gossip-puking machine being switched on, very gently humming as it builds up to full motion come 2012. It's November, if its early enough for Coca-Cola to start showing their Xmas ads then its early enough for half of our players to be linked with moves away.

Movember Update (day 14)

Movember update.

Visit The_Fighting_Cock 'My mo space page'.

We've also been updating the page and the thread over at The Fighting Cock forum with weekly photos and updates on the growth and styling of our majestic moustaches.

To donate or join the team, click on the link and ‘donate to my team’ or ‘join team’. Rejoice the 30 day journey of moustachery.

 

Almost at the half-way mark of the month now, and I'm still sporting the Lemmy look that is being mistaken for the Village People Blue Oyster club moustache. Classy.

The Fighting Cock

It's a podcast. It's on itunes. It's also hosted here on DML but its the website you need to be visiting - click here to see it. You can listen to the pods, sign up to the forum and generally get involved with all the debauchery. Your mother is welcome too. Blogger wannabes/contributors also most welcome. Our fledgling community accepts all lost souls. We all know how fragmented Tottenham fans are (especially on-line) so if you've been rejected from one of those forbidden closed off message boards or simply want to mix your football with topical matters such as how to execute the camp-fire method, feel free to pop in and say hi.

16 episodes in we've decided to have ourselves a logo make-over which will go live later on this evening (click on the image below for a countdown...yes, a countdown because we're nerdy like that).

the fighting cock team

@RickyTFC @ChicagoDanTFC @Flav_Bateman @tehTrunk 

@TheloniousFilth @Alex_Prole @Spooky23 @sibsTHFC

@lovetheshirt

www.thefightingcock.co.uk

Not that we actually have a logo at the minute. Hence the necessity. If you listen to the pod and can't get through the first 10 minutes of random chat but take the time to post your abuse about not liking it, remember its not you rejecting us, its us filtering you out ;)

Love the shirt.

Forward thinking should not hold us back

With the transfer window now a distant memory along with the additional depressing low ebb that consumed us in the aftermath, what with Jim White’s head failing to fully explode in decapitating HD, how best to look back with the aid of hindsight and pose the question: Could we have done better in our endeavours had we bulked up our forward line with far more assured and proven quality?

I think, probably not. I know, I know, considering I was spitting blood for an injection of the world class to lead our march forwards in Europe and our gleeful skip and trip domestically. The first apparent flaw is that for all the hype and stories at the time, there was no definitive true target. Even the players the club might have pencilled in as possibilities were not (looking back at it all) the type of players we perhaps should have been flirting with. Forlan has hardly been in inspired form this season and his price tag is perhaps too steep for his age.

The other targets appeared like after thoughts and misinformation disguised as apparent bids and keen interest. Which the club might have allowed the media to play out to make us look busy, a suspicion you could easily agree with when you delve deeper into the supposed bids for half of La Liga’s strikers when the reality was, at least in the case of Sergio Agüero, that football politics at Atlético Madrid was the main reason behind the story unfolding in the manner it did.

Roman Pavlyuchenko was once upon a time meant to be the answer, out of desperation from the failure to grab some Arsh(avin) from Zenit. Looking at how that one panned out (the Russians wanted £20M in the end having over-stepped the mark countless times during negotiations asking for more each time) with the player finally going to Arsenal for a snip and hardly proving to be the dynamic tongue show-off he was expected to be – I’d say lucky escape.

That’s lucky until you count the pennies spent on Roman who spent the first year tired and struggling with his English and every year since playing the role of the cameo. And still struggling with the English. Hardly worth the £14M in terms of how we’ve (not) implemented him into the side. The white Darren Bent. Scores goals, actually scores far better goals technique wise that Bent, but doesn’t play consistently enough for us to truly know just how good he could be. Did score important goals last season. An expensive super-sub, hardly the answer.

When you do look back, it appears to hurt less now that we failed to sign a forward back then when we were quite obviously not one hundred percent in love with one. Other targets were hardly fitting into the required template. We have a template, right?

Luis Suarez wasn’t quite the type of footballer we needed when we were looking for a striker rather than a partner for a striker. Although with the way we play (ideally with vdV pushing up into the pen area) you could say players like Suarez and Agüero would complement our style. Complete clever crafty inter-linking with the forward running midfielders. But then again, we play with width mostly and simply want a player that can knock’em into the onion bag without a seconds thought.

Yeah, so no template.

Andy Carroll, I fancied a bit and is a candidate for the one player that the club might have wanted above and beyond all others. Love or lust for Andy? He's sort of old school Bobby Smith battering ram with ponytail. Direct, touch of skill, but plenty of physicality. Can shoot, can get on the end of a cross and can head. Questionable balance, but thankfully no bar stools out on the pitch at the Lane. Questionable transfer price too. I cite Kenwyne Jones as evidence. The Trinidadian Andy Carroll. £20M Sunderland wanted for him. Now if we’re talking lucky escapes that’s a peach. But something tells me Carroll won't disappoint disappear and end up at a lower level side.

I’m not suggesting taking a risk is the wrong thing to do. Considering we usually just splash the money out without thought (Bentley anyone?). Some of our risks have been stunning with success. Modric and Berbatov in the season he used us to display all his worth to Ferguson. I’m not sure what I’m suggesting. Other than perhaps some type of tangible focus on the exact ilk of forward we actually want/need that can adapt to perhaps playing up front on his own or as one part of two.

A Lineker. A Greaves. A Bobby Smith. A Klinsmann.

Brilliant players who would fit into any side with minimal fuss simply because of the talent they possess.

Okay, so we’re screwed. But if our scouts can find a composed unfazed kid like Sandro for our midfield (be it a kid that has experience in the robust Copa Libertadores de América) then surely we can find a hungry marksman that can spearhead the swashbuckle?

This doesn't need to be complicated, yet somehow it is.

The players I cited are obviously all Spurs legends. All different in their manner and footballing style but all the same when in front of goal: Ruthless. And all sadly unavailable.

The new Berbatov was quite obviously Dzeko if you wish to compare goal scoring antics in the Bundesliga. Neither were unknown commodities when they transferred to their new clubs. But what chances of us competing with City and their hordes of riches? Although looking at his first touch, you wonder again - lucky escape - or maybe just another foreigner finding the grass in Blightly a little tricky to play on (but will come good in time).

Perhaps all our targets could have fitted into the side without too much trouble, if you are in agreement that each target was an upgrade to the players who have at the minute. Maybe I'm the one complicating things and that our apparent erratic money flashing policy to just bid for anyone would result with a quality signing - no matter the one signed.

Yeah, that doesn't quite stick does it?

What is unquestionably evident, as predicted and known amongst all, is that upgrades are needed. Agreed? Players to match the likes of Modric, van der Vaart and Bale in impact to give us more options than a hoof and a knock-down. That isn’t a dig at Crouch, he serves his purpose and does so well. But we need something more to edge closer to the sides above us. We need a defined Plan A to go with the collection of Plan B's we have.

At the moment we are doing our very best with one boot lace untied, losing our footing every so often with said boot left behind stuck in the mud trying to kick the ball with a sock. Could we have done better in our endeavours had we bulked up our forward line with far more assured and proven quality? You’d like to say yes to that question, but we’ll never know because there’s no real way of knowing how the signings would have turned out. Out of form, injured, new country – plenty of potential hiccups for the bedding in period for most of the players we were linked with.

Tactically, Harry has changed the way we play a few times to accommodate a player, famously with vdV. The way we line-up in Europe tends to be different to the way we’d prefer to line-up in the league. A new player up front that was like-for-like in style (but an improvement) than our current crop might not have given him any further headaches. Say we lined-up with a fit Carroll up top. Or say an in-form Torres (just pretend) or a twenty-six year old Drogba (really pretend). We'd hardly need to change our style of play. I guess our desperation in wanting a new forward (just sign someone for the Love of God!!) was because new blood would most probably give us a refreshing rejuvenation and goal revival because that type of thing happens. Probably. Maybe.

Hindsight is hardly helping me here.

There was no such luck with a galvanising last minute shock signing. You tend to forget our gaffers more favoured signings (Bellamy, Parker, Cole) when the opportunistic one out shined them all. The great thing is, Harry always finds a way even if it sometimes feels like he gets away with a wing or two. And perhaps issues concerning money and progression at both at home in the Premier League and away in Europe has left the chairman thinking about other battles that need to be fought first in the summer to retain key players before building on key areas.

So, like I said at the start. Probably not, no, in reference to 'could we have done better?'. We’d probably be sat where we are sat at the minute. Fifth within touching distance of fourth and in the quarter-finals of the Champions League. Not bad considering our deficiencies, which are only such because of our new founded ambitions. That's just my opinion. You might disagree and suggest a top drawer forward would have scored the goals to have us sitting in third. Or better.

Conclusion from this messy ramble of thoughts? No massive shocker: the right player has to be available for the right price. Consolidation is always a risk if you spend big in the belief that the seduction of a new striker would equate to success on the pitch. That and there’s always the argument that if our current strikeforce took us to the Champions League and that same threesome remain present then that same three can perhaps strike their lightning emphatically a second time. Even if they are doing their utmost to be out-scored by the midfield.

My personal thoughts are that we need to sign a young player who we can truly blood in at the deep end. ‘The future’. We need to sign a world class technically gifted striker who has enough savvy and intelligence to link up with the midfield as well as goal-poach and goal-create. There has to be someone out there for the Lilywhite shirt.

At the moment, I’d say Roman is the player the club will let go. Leaving us with Defoe, Crouch and <someone new> + <young kid for the future>.

Upgrades on Defoe and Crouch can follow post-Harry for England.

For the moment, much like when the the Jan window shut, all we can do is support the players we have and hope that Harry has his best players available for selection and that he mixes it up a bit in the run-in and the quarter final. Let’s not pretend that a side with a full-pelt of Bale, Modric, van der Vaart and Huddlestone wouldn’t carve out goals for anyone of the players we have.

Defoe has had a stop-start season what with his injury and his red card and the fact that we don't play a consistent forward line-up in terms of one or two leading from the front. Crouch does a job, one that is much maligned and confusing and frustrating because of his not so amazing goal ratio. Pav continues to flatter to deceive. A scorer of great goals, not a great goal scorer.

We'll see how it pans out in the coming weeks because if there was ever a time for someone to lace up that second boot, it's now.

I have faith, as ever.

Nominations for the worst ever transfer rumour and ITK nonsense

Not a clue what demonic darkly lit hospital room the Woodgate to Arsenal story was birthed in. No doubt Gregory Peck failed (again) to lay waste to what feels like the six hundredth and sixtieth slice of ridiculousness. With no apparent end in sight. Other than the start of February. In these days of footballing wealth, hardly anyone is spending and it's all a bit boring especially in the ITK community which mostly appears to be reactive with whatever the press run with (which of the two creates the story in the first place is uncertain but it mostly all feels like it's based on agent BS and Harry Redknapp sound-bites).

What the Woody to the swamp story has done is remind me of a classic moment in transfer gossip from the days of Ramos at the Lane, in 2008, on the 25th of January. Easily my nomination for the most ludicrous rumour from recent years:

Carlos Puyo.

With thanks to Sky Sports News for this gem.

Here's the blog article from that epic slow-news day:

Earlier this evening we had the yellow ticker telling us that the Tiago deal is off. Then the ticker disappeared, and we were told its back on and should be completed this weekend. But nothing compares to the latest 'Sky Sports Understands'.

Yes. Read it for yourself:

Sky Sports News understands that Tottenham want to sign Barcelona defender Carlos Puyol.

Juande Ramos is thought to be keen to strengthen his defence as he continues to reshape his White Hart Lane squad.

It is claimed that Tottenham representatives are in Spain to discuss a move with the Barcelona captain.

Ramos has also been linked with an approach for Middlesbrough defender Jonathan Woodgate as he attempts to find an experienced centre-back to bring to North London.

Puyol has made 58 appearances for Spain and played in the 2002 and 2006 World Cup finals.

Yes. The Barcelona captain who has been at the club since the age of twelve. Plays Champions League football and is on about £100,000 a month. Someone appears to be sharing their crack pipe in the SSN HQ. Although modern day journalism 'breaking news stories' are dependent on what they can copy and paste from a football message board, this one just about takes the biscuit. Yes, it appeared on the yellow ticker and the auto-cue dolly bird and man-robot informed us of another exclusive. And yes, its now disappeared. Along with the little credibility this 'news' channel appears to have left.

Nothing reported in Sport, Depotivo Mundo or Catalan TV. For the record, the player isn't even in Barcelona as they are away to Bilbao this weekend. And if Spurs wont pay Fred the money he wants then....well, you work it out.

Only other explanation? Smokescreen. Or Levy is attempting to flush out the rats.

The cover-up was superb. Ticker, website article...then it's all gone and it's not referred to again, not a mention. Almost felt like it was either a prank or they were running with unsubstantiated whispers (shock horror).

Cracking stuff.

Did enjoy this update from Flannerz over at Glory Glory pre-match away to Newcastle this past weekend:

"Went to the game Saturday, but went up Thursday night and made a long weekend of it. I was in the casino Friday night and at 5am Andy Carroll turns up píssed and starts playing Blackjack. Because he was drunk and a Geordie I couldn't understand what he was saying apart from that he thought Spurs would ...win 2-1. When I asked him about joining us I couldn't understand his answer!"

We'll know if Carroll is on his way if Flannerz can remember the drunken words spoken to him on the night and then decipher the cryptic. Bit like reading most of the ITK's updates then. Which bring me onto this reprehensible example of utter pish from the Phantom of the Lane (dated 24th Jan 2011):

anyone been on the website lastminute.com?

That's it. Amazing stuff. Followed up with:

We're not done yet.
When have we ever been done before the last second of the window?
Non cryptic- We need a couple of things to happen before something happens if ya get ma drift

Phants, take your place in the hall of fame.

So your favourite worst ever transfer rumour? (Look, it's either this or another Stratford article which I'm doing my best to avoid* writing what with the announcement that the OS decision has been postponed, so work with me on this).

*Levy on SSN at time of writing in Olympic Bid special, so no doubt, expect another blog this late evening.