And so it begins...

Morning all. Thought I'd drop a blog while I munch my way through my coco-pops (hot milk just like the advert). It's the first of January which is you know what time. Yep, the gates of tabloid hell are open and one thousand demented monkeys are let loose on type-writers, churning out an infinite amount of possibilities in the way of transfer stories, each one delivered by carrier pigeon to every entity of the Murdoch Empire and re-used every few days with different pictures to give us the illusion of development.

It's the January transfer window, and its about to vomit its chunky unsightly sick all over us.

I'm already giddy with excitement thanks to the first new year 'stories'. Bite size carrot chunks already been gagged on. The first one concerns Harry's 'comeback' on Pav's outburst. Roman telling everyone that our gaffer has been mocking him and although it seems that Harry is still citing the Russian as being a good player/footballer, it's a bit of mis-direction leading to how he's now willing to listen to any offers (as long as the offer is of the right kind).

Let's not let this one drag out.

We've also got the Sandro story, which has plodded along for 6 months now. He's close to / has agreed terms. The story suggests he has agreed personal terms but both clubs are trying to work out the transfer. If there are plans afoot to sign him, I'm sure it hasn't been such a long tedious process. As we have a 'relationship' with Internacional and if we've agreed something, its probably already been done and dusted. Then again, considering what we went through with that other Brazilian club (Santos) when we almost/should have signed Diego (sigh) perhaps this is the only way to sign South American players.

The other news item that has me smiling is the one from the Guardian that states:

Tottenham manager Harry Redknapp, who has signed 19 players in the last five January transfer windows, says the mid-season transfer window is "a nightmare" and claims the chances of him bringing anybody to Spurs this month are "very, very, very, very slim" - Read it here.

So, that's what? Four verys which makes it very x 4 slim of us signing anyone, but it's not 5 verys or God forbid 6 so I'm reading between the lines here and I'm gonna hazard another one of those guesses and assume (ass, you and me) that Harry is playing down our chances of bringing in some new recruits.

I'll end this afternoons blog (yes, I'm having coco-pops for brunch) by reposting some stats I read over at THFCLatest 2 this morning (copied from elsewhere, so forgive me for not knowing the original source but these types of stats are probably all over the place at the moment):

Tottenham have exactly the same points total from 20 games (37) as the 2005-06 season when they lost out on fourth on the final day.

Only Cesc Fabregas and Ryan Giggs have created more goals than Aaron Lennon in the top flight.

Jermain Defoe has already has his most successful scoring season ever in the Premier League with 14 goals.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. We need to consolidate. We need to add something extra to the squad and avoid the potential to fade away.

Be positive. Attack.

What I'm waiting for is for those other more cultured monkeys to get their typewriters out. Not the hacks, the message board ITK sub-communities. Is it just me or have we had a very prolonged quiet time from them recently? Have Spurs chopped down all the trees surrounding the Lodge?

Have a good one today.

Sandro, done and dusted, so say the Brazilians...

Okay, brace yourselves for yet another tabloid explosion. I've seen the News of the World have already picked up on this, and had I not read Cule-Spur's post over at GG I'd have thought the hacks over at the red tops were ITK and not just looking across the Atlantic towards South America where apparently the Brazilian press have been running with the story since yesterday. Globo Sport broke it and have been running Sky Sports News style it all day and are also discussing the possible replacement once Sandro makes his way to sunny N17.

Sandro is on his way. I know. Who'd have thought it.

I guess there's money in the kitty to splash out with, post-car boot sale.

Then again, perhaps this is just an example of Brazilian tabloid guess-work. Keep panties on for now.

How much does a Bentley cost?

So apparently, Daniel Levy does not envisage the club being very active cometh the Jan transfer window, although he suggests that if opportunities arise we'll take note - but shouldn't expect any net spending. And to dizzy up the quotes further he's reassured Harry that there will be no disruption to the core team. To quote Mr Chairman:

"Having a settled squad gives us the best chance for consistency. We are striving for top-level displays, including the ability to take on and beat the so-called top four teams."

I'm thankful we have proven top 4 players like Robbie Keane in the squad. And Gerrardesque midfielders such as Jenas box to boxing their way up and down the pitch, when he's not sitting on the bench watching Huddlestone do the same thing. Well, not do the same thing pound-for-pound. Hudd has no need for speed. He lets the ball do all the running. Mobility is for people with no footballing brain. But midfield semantics aside, we're good to go. We've got a back four unit, robust and sturdy, a mixture of youth and experience. Mostly youth at the moment. And we have cover for our midfield enforcer. He's at Pompey, but should be back with us in no time. We've got no true cover for our little wing wizard, but that's fine, because he won't get injured. And as for our forward line-up (did I mention Robbie Keane?) we've got the master of scoring goals in bursts and breaking the offside trap (Defoe) and the perfect foil (Crouch) when our players forget tactics and resort to hoofing the ball. And let's not be forgetting the soon-to-be-back-in-Lilywhite, Luka Modric. Who I guess in essence will be akin to a brand spanking new signing. Maybe we could have a press conference and pretend we've just signed him to make up for the despondency that there will not be a £15M transfer splurge on new blood when 2010 tick tocks into our lives.

Consistency equates to beating the so-called top four teams. Who are so-called top four because they finish in the top four positions. I made that connection all on my own. And we've had consistency this season, be it with missing players (due to injuries) and an ever-changing back-four line-up and erratic forwards which has given us a consistent set of results. 3-1, 3-0, 3-0. Zero points. Against three of the top four. The other one doesn't count because everyone is beating them.

So enjoy your Christmas presents because we wont be unwrapping too much in the way of surprises when the window reopens. Other than Sandro. Because Harry mentioned we're interested and the chairman is working towards a deal. Oh, and we're going to need to add a little in the way of depth when replacing Roman Pavlyuchenko and David Bentley. They're not core players. We hardly ever play them. And they're not very good. And for the sake of avoiding egg on face (or perhaps managing to wipe away the egg currently on face) the club will need to recover something from their self-pitying stays in N17. And we all know Bentley is a certainty to go after his show-boating antics in a Spurs friendly game that infuriated Harry. You'll have seen it doing the rounds today. A few days after the story was posted and shared in various message boards. You know the one. The one where Harry tells David he's going to get rid of him. DUM DUM DUM DUM DUM-DA-DADUM.

Let's hope we get a good price for a cluttered Bentley with a dodgy engine and hanging fuzzy dice.

I can't keep this up anymore.

There is no story here. We've obviously not got bundles of cash to spunk wastefully on players. Mainly because we've already spunked it. On wasteful players. We're letting people know indirectly (directly) we have no intention of over-spending (breaking a habit of a life-time here).

The main backbone of the side is good enough to sustain some sort of challenge. As good a challenge that a club like Spurs (non-Champions League and non-Sheik owned)  can prepare for. It's the meat around the bones that needs beefing up. And it's guaranteed that anybody who is deemed malignant will be removed with swift and necessary surgery.

The money will be there to spend once we streamline the squad, we just don't need to be mentalists about it. A defensive midfielder is needed (Sandro the obvious target). A centre-back (long-term solution to the Ledley King conundrum) should also be discussed in-house. Unless you think a back four of BAE - Bassong - Dawson - Corluka will work without a commanding, leading presence to guide them (Daws is 26 years old, but lacks sustained experience). Perhaps a goalkeeper too. For cover, nothing more. Other solutions will involve development rather than throwing money at it to make it work (i.e. Bale - is he a left-back or a left-midfielder and can he cover BAE's absence when he leaves for the African Nations Cup?).

The backbone of the side will suffer no major trauma (which means key players - yes, Robbie Keane is a key player) will stay put. So it's not exactly breaking news that selling to buy is going to be the tactic here. And that there is no need for massive massive signings.

If you think back to 2006, what we failed to do is bulk up in Jan (didn’t we sign Ghaly?) and had we, we might well have wrapped up 4th spot long before the saboteur broke into the hotel and coughed germs all over the players soon to be eaten dinner. Levy knows already (thanks to Harry's complaints a while back about the lack of midfield depth) that we need consolidation in that area. Ignoring Robbie Keane's shout-out about how strong our bench is, we all know the reality is rather different. We don’t have enough in reserve.

Expect a post-Christmas cracker. We'll sign what we need, nothing more, nothing less and then it's all down to the manager and the players to believe and work hard. Qualities that might prove to be priceless in the long run.

Sandro the destructive to Spurs?

Sandro. The missing piece of the jigsaw. Although if I'm completely honest, I'm basing that on what I think is the missing piece rather than the type of player Sandro actually is. I can't really offer anything in the way of personal 'I swear on my life' insight into what type of player the young Brazilian is. Sure, I can quote you from a tabloid transfer article or perhaps what a regular on the Glory Glory forum thinks, but I've never actually seen the bloke play. Youtube/online streaming video footage doesn't count, mainly because it has a habit of mis-interpretation.

I remember salivating at ridiculous 30 yard goals from impossible angles (Rebrov) and tricky instinctive box work (Postiga) only to be left crying despondently with regret later. My only 'experience' of Sandro is from signing him for Spurs side in my current FM2010 save game and using him as back-up for Wilson Palacios - sometimes even partnering him in the middle for a difficult away game. Based on a computer game, Sandro is strong and although defensive, has plenty of attacking qualities and an eye for scoring from distance (although this may be thanks to an in-game mis-representaiton/bug where far too many goals are scored from long range).

So, who is Sandro exactly? Can he hit the ground running if he turns out in Lilywhite come January, or will he require a season or so of 'bedding in' to settle into the tempo of the EPL? Or perhaps he is confident and adaptable and wont struggle as long as he joins a side that's in form. If we are performing, it will be far easier for him to get to grips with midfield tussles.

All I have to go on is a gut feeling at the moment. Which is risky. So I can only think our scouts have seen enough of this lad to warrant him a worthy acquisition. Rather than a superfluous (there's that word again) one. The last time we signed a DM, it was Wilson. And although Wilson appears to have suffered a little with form in recent months - there's no doubt he will recapture the type of discipline he possessed at the back end of last season. So bringing in a young understudy has to be the answer. Jamie O'Hara obviously is not. Bostock is possibly a couple of seasons away from breaking into the first team (and he's a little more offensive). Jenas is Jenas, bless his little cotton socks.

Sandro, still the missing piece of the jigsaw? What does he do exactly? Based on what others say:

He's comfortable on the ball
He works hard
Has box to box qualities
Aggressive in the tackle
Has leadership qualities
Not overly creative (could improve)
Decent in a holding role

Doesn't sound shabby.  There's a Willie Gannon article on Sandro that includes such statements as:

'dynamic midfielder'
'holding midfielder - his primary role for Inter where he has been destructive'
'initiates his team’s many attacks with his penetrating runs through midfield'
'simplistic style /rarely gives the ball away'

Again, doesn't sound too shabby at all. But once more, these are opinions which you may or may not trust as they are words of others rather than something you've witnessed with your own eyes. But leaps of faith is what we take with imported players. And Sandro, Brazilian U20 captain (I think), does appear to have some substance to the hype.

As far as the centre of the park is concerned, he appears to offer more dimensions to his play than our other current options. The key quality being leadership. I might look him up on Youtube. After being burnt by the Rebrov and Postiga collections the last time I dared venture was to see clips of a certain Bulgarian. So perhaps the internet doesn't always lie.

I do like his attitude in print. To quote the man: "I don't want to speak too much about this but I am ready to move to Europe. I am convinced my style will suit a team that favours an attacking approach."

He seems confident of his abilities. And the Internacional fans also seem to like him where it matters most, on the pitch and on the terraces:

"Sandro scores the goals, Sandro scores the goals, Sandro scores the goals, so we will give him a cow, and he will milk it" 

We might need to re-work that for the Park Lane. Don't ask me about the cow. I haven't got a clue.

So for now, we wait. The press are making various assumptions about price (ranging from £6M to the original/traditional £16M figure). There's the issue rights/ownership, which if you remember ruined our chances of signing Diego several years ago. His club claim he's not leaving, then we read about how the deal is progressing. Sit back, and hold onto your hats.

Roman's Never-Ending Story

It's international break which means it's time for yet another episode in the long running snooze-fest that is Roman Pavlychenkos statuesque escape from White Hart Lane. Roman usually doesn't have a speaking part, with his agent left to do all the on-screen talking. But as we near the finale, he appears to have stepped up, giving us a virtuoso performance full of determination and intent.

"I want to leave the club. It is impossible to remain there under the circumstance I find myself in. I have been sitting on the subs' bench for half a year and as a result lost a place in the starting 11 of the national team. And now hopefully we will get to the World Cup - who will rely on a forward who does not play? I want to play and not just warm the bench. Immediately after the games with Slovenia, my agent and I are flying to London for purposeful negotiations and I want to take part in them personally…"

And so forth. It's a little bit Brando in Apocalypse Now.

There's no doubt this series has been a disappointment. No major twists, no big surprises. Just the same drawn-out sub plot that neither excites the viewer or leaves them drooling in anticipation for more. And the reason is oh so painfully obvious. The supposed main supporting cast member (our Roman) has been relegated to nothing more than an extra. Background fluff that has resulted in nothing much in the way of screen time so that we can perhaps find out more about him. The cameos are obviously not enough, and having him appear every now and again has never proved to be a fruitful exercise. The viewers haven't seen enough to want more and rest have seen enough to not care for more.

Some might argue that we are seeing is reminiscent of the infamous canned show which starred the Ukrainian forward Sergei Rebrov. That particular series was left to stagnate whilst everyone waited for improvement that was never forthcoming. A spin-off series where he found himself lost on an island made of Lego surrounded by incomprehensible hostiles was equally weak in narrative.

It's simply not been right from the off. If he's signed for £14M and is apparently out of sorts at the start of his contract and then hardly given a chance to make amends a summer later, then he is bound to look lacklustre when he is given a rare opportunity to shine. It's a catch 22 and a stronger player might have perhaps taken those opportunities and done more with them. Then again, if it's decided to bring back a former star and offer him a bumper package that includes a starring role in every single episode - then I guess you'd be more demoralised to see someone who is obviously more out of sorts than you, get preferential treatment.

Controversial stuff.

Fact is, those same signs of mediocrity are still there to be seen. The lad should never have left Russian television in the first place.

You pulling my Johnson?

I'm conflicted. When there are moments of nothingness between Spurs games I'd prefer not to write up something contrived just for the sake of it and rant on about what the tabloids consider to be news worthy adding unwarranted weight to something that is nothing more than a dirty feather.

If I go ahead and do so, I feel guilty for jumping onto the bandwagon. Other bloggers, might not have a crisis of the soul, and not think twice about commenting and so it snowballs and then everyone is discussing it, making it almost tangible. But then like a cancer - it spreads, relentless and unforgiving. Even though most know there is nothing there. A phantom. Its no cancer. Its not even a common cold. Its nothing more than hot air. But acknowledging its existence is easier than simply ignoring it. It's an instinctive reaction, and one that annoys me.

 

Johnson, 2 years ago v Sunderland

And here I am. About to contradict myself and do the exact thing I keep promising not to. Irony only has to pull her skirt slowly upwards ever so slightly to reveal a little bit more of that delicious thigh and I'm once more seduced.

I've not been paying attention and I can't claim to know what order the following skipped into the public domain in, but in the past week we've had:

- Jamie O'Hara may or may not stay at Pompey (direct Harry quote)
- Sandro has been re-linked (looks like the same story from the last transfer window)
- Spurs lack midfield depth ('We've only got Wilson, JJ and Huddlestone' confirms Harry)

And using the tabloid formula of conclusion, this equates to us being in the market for a new addition. So naturally, the next Spurs transfer story has to be related to a centre midfielder. No shock there.

But I guess I shouldn't frown too much about selling out and talking about it. The damage has already been done. It's multiplying itself across News Now as we speak like demented Gremlins birthed from a wet sorry mogwai.

Michael Johnson is apparently a £6M target for Tottenham which will aid us in our quest for central midfield depth. You remember Michael Johnson, right? He's this weeks nomination for a move to White Hart Lane (I'm surprised nobody has suggested Davids yet).

Johnson has returned from a long period on the sidelines. Very long period. Apparently suffering from an 'abdominal injury' which he comforted by growing fat. You'll note most photos being used in the sports related articles are of a baby-faced Johnson from around two seasons ago. Which is nice of them.

Two years on the sidelines and this could be you

It’s been so long since I last saw Johnson play that I can't even remember what type of player he is. I'm going to go with 'midfielder with a bit of eveything'. If a City fan is reading this, please go ahead and correct me.

I do remember he was useful but other than being cited as the next big thing I don't recall much more. Other than people telling me he was useful. What I do know is that at Man City there are several players ahead of him fighting for first team action. And this is a fact that isn't lost on the journos either because it allows them to include a hook in their story. A possibility for interest because the lad is 'arguably' available based on him requiring games to regain fitness and will struggle to get into the team at Eastlands. If he was more than decent two years ago and if he gets fit and has no more 'abdominal' problems most wouldn't say not to him signing. For £2M - £3M. But abdominal problems are a curious type. So knock off another £1M and then Harry might take a geniune look.

Another fact is that he's only played one minute of Prem football since his 'return'. That must have been some minute for us to be pencilling in a £6M move. I know what. Forget the discounted suggestion above, and let's wait until he completes two minutes and bid £12M and then round it off to £15M to guarantee nobody gazumps us.

Regardless of the reason(s) for his time away (I don't need to paint a picture) if the lad has talent it might re-emerge. It might not. One thing is for certain, we won't be paying £6M to find out.

And as for the regurgitated Sandro transfer stories, according to press reports we are back in for him and should be signing him cometh the Jan window. And the source? Other press reports. Yes. We have a press report that repeats information from another press report that is then copied for another press report. Let's get it done before Barca or Real swoop in to steal him away from our Brazilian partners, Internacional.

I'll stop there before I start posting pictures of a monged out Crouch and Woodgate looking like extras from a zombie movie with the title 'caption competition' or a damning editorial about the misbehaving dos Santos out with his family. The heathen.

And there we go. I just couldn't ignore the headlines and just had to waste my time and yours with contrived commentary that lacked insight. I'm once more part of the system. A fully fledged disciple of disdain. Please accept my unequivocal apology for my moment of weakness and rejoice with me that we are now closer to the weekend and the visit of Stoke.