Oliver Holt

Holt, Daily Mirror journalist and Sky Sports Sunday Supplement melter, thinks the pressure that Paul Ince is under at Blackburn and the abuse he is getting from sections of the home support is simply because of the colour of his skin and has nothing to do with the former MK Dons boss being completely out of his depth. His argument is that Roy Keane was not subject to the same treatment from the fans at Sunderland.

This bloke actually gets paid by a tabloid newspaper and a tv broadcaster to write and speak his views. All these years, all the job opportunities I've had - if I had known that all I needed to do was pull my pants down, stick my arse in the air and fart shit every time I had an opinion I'd be laughing myself all the way to my pension. People in the media who get paid to commentate on weekly events in football are no different from the thousands who frequent message boards (apart from the fact they get paid, obviously). Some talk sense, some talk a lot of sense, the rest are trolls. Any takers on which one Oliver is? It's not the ones who talk sense. And no chance is it the ones who talk a lot of sense. Its the troll. He's a troll. Oliver Holt is a troll. Troll, if you're still not getting what he is.

Morning

According to SSN, Harry wants rid of Pav, but nobody is interested. 1 goal in every 2 games Pav obviously doesn't know where the back of the net is, the lazy Carlos Kickaball. How dare he not settle in London and average 2 goals per game from the off. Considering the lack of depth we have upfront, this is yet another example of lazy unnecessary reporting which has no relevance to anything other than filling up a couple of hours of time in between all the rehashed-every-20-minutes of non-event headlines going into the weekend that Sky Sports News drowns in.

Ramos, apparently wants Adam Johnson. I kid you not. Madrid obviously going for a next generation galactico.

Elsewhere, forgot to mention yesterday the Jamie Redknapp to Chelsea story. He's apparently coaching reserve players twice a week (so sadly he'll be free to pundit on Sky Sports over the weekend). Massive massive move there for Jamie, and no doubt he'll continue to be impartial when discussing his cousin Frank Lampard, Chelsea, Liverpool and his dad at Tottenham. I don't know about you, but if I'm out at White Hart Lane and miss whatever is being televised I rush home after the final whistle, and sit in-front of the tv with my wank-rag watching Jamie tells us how it is in that ever handsome yet definitely not clichéd manner he has when he insightfully tells us he can see a chess game when all we can see is 45 minutes of fucking crap. Surely our Jamie would have been a better bet than Tim 'I hate Spurs unless they are paying me wages and all the slagging off I did about them on the radio didn't really happen' Sherwood.

We've lost out big time there people. Big time.

Britians Most Wanted

The current UK's Most Wanted list from Crimestoppers:

• Rape
• Indecent chanting
• Cocaine supply
• Robbery
• Assault

For your information:

Who chooses the appeals on the site?

Police forces across the UK are responsible for the appeals on the site. They choose who goes on Most Wanted and who does not. The nature of the crime or the investigation will have an influence on whether an appeal is put on Most Wanted. The police are also responsible for the accuracy of the appeal information provided and removing appeals.

Staggering stuff.

*UPDATE*

Looks like the Tottenham 16 have been removed from the Most Wanted list.

Team News

Not sure why I keep thinking Ronaldo is unavailable for Saturday. He'll play regardless of the alleged injury. The mind-games have began in earnest with Fergie initially announcing that Berbatov and Carrick are doubtful and face late fitness tests, but then suggesting Berba will definitely be available. Shocker to know. Don't know why managers bother with all this 'he might be injured' sillyness.

We've done the same thing with doubts cast over Modric and (I think) Pav. And of course King. I'm really into my research at the minute.

As for Gareth Bale? One hopes he gets stuck in traffic.

Challenge Spurs™ - The Return of the Sulk

Challenge Spurs™

Game 09 v (H) Manchester United
Total points: 18
Position: 15th

Let's get straight to the point. Dimitar Berbatov is a class act on the pitch. He possesses sublime skill, touch and vision and can score goals of wonder and help craft chances out of nothing for his team-mates. World-class? Possibly. Very much (was) the nearest thing we've had to a world-class player at Spurs since Jurgen. Off the pitch, the impression he gives is of a simple man who simply wants to play football for the sake of football and not for money, much preferring the quiet life feeding squirrels in the garden than night-clubbing and pulling birds. The reality is a little different. Silent and moody and calculated. We all know what happened with his unwillingness to play two Spurs games, practically threatening to go on strike to help engineer a move to Manchester United.

For all of his elegance on the pitch, the man is a slime-ball off it. A childish spoilt brat of a sulk.

At his dream club, he hasn't exactly set the world on fire with his goal ratio. Much like Robbie Keane, when you leave your comfort zone, the adjustment period can take a while to set which means having to wait before reclaiming past form. Berbatov will be more than content where he is regardless. He is a first team regular. His return to White Hart Lane on Saturday is likely to result with him facing monumental abuse. Which he'll probably respond with by scoring a goal and setting up another. Carrick on the other hand will probably get applause.

I don't expect us to beat Manchester United. They rested most of their players on Wednesday night for their Champions League game. Chelsea have a home game against West Ham, so Utd simply cannot afford to slip up. And as for us, we've not been that great even with all our recent wins. Plucky and lucky against Liverpool, we've need the same type of game to get that type of result off Utd. But they have been a little out of sorts away from home this season so maybe, just maybe, a minor-miracle can occur. Historically, they don't against Fergies lot, so best to expect nothing from this one and be happy with a point if we get one.

No Rooney. No Evra. Apparently no Ronaldo. So we might see the eager to please Tevev start. We'll no doubt have Jenas and Zokora in the team. Zokora, currently rejuvenated and linked with a move to Real Madrid. I kid you not. That's the standard of journalism in this country at the minute. I'm sure you broke a rib laughing your arse off yesterday reading about how Ramos wants to sign Lennon and Bentley.

Riiiight. Bentley? The same player who quite obviously disliked Ramos and was indirectly/directly vocal about it? That Bentley? Unbelievable how a newspaper editor can validate such bullshit and be happy with it going to print. When you consider the players that Madrid do have and the spending power that posesses, Spurs players will be nowhere on the list of proposed targets. Arshavin, the player we wouldn't pay the extra few million for, is also linked to Madrid (although that was more of the usual pre-game mind-games Madrid plays with Zenit). But worth noting that had we not spunked £16M on Bentley, we would have got the Russian playmaker, no trouble. No Comolli, so over to Levy for the regrets.

Gareth Bale (didn't play against West Ham = we won) should be locked up in a vault until the final whistle. Lennon should be allowed to swap flanks and be told to run at the full-backs insistently. Modric, God bless him, should be given the key to free-roam as he will be the key to us getting anywhere hitting something on target. Bent and Pav upfront - no 4-5-1 thank you very much.

As for King. I've already sacrificed a Cockerel in the name of the footballing Gods, to help aid his recovery in time for selection.

We may as well go for it. Out of the remaining Dirty Dozen games, this is one which most wouldn't frown upon if we lost. We came so close to winning it last year, so that minor-miracle I mentioned earlier might not be too far-fetched of a dream.

We are currently unbeaten against the Cartel (Chelsea - D / Arsenal - D / Liverpool - W) so who knows. No doubt the presence of Berbatov will rile up the home fans and have the Utd following goad us about it. It's going to be tasty. But there is no room for mistakes, either at the back or when presented with a golden opportunity.

As for Berba. Give him what for. You wouldn't smile and say 'Hello, how you doing?' to an ex-girlfriend who dumped you for some bloke with a bigger cock, would you?

Prediction: Not good

Lunacy

Anyone read The Telegraph yesterday? Along with an article, they published photos released by the police of suspects they would like to question about indecent chanting at the Pompey v Spurs game from earlier this season. The police don't directly mention racial chanting. But the Telegraph ran the headline that these fans were allegedly singing racial abuse. All very much of a legal minefield. What are the police investigating exactly? Is it indecent (which I guess can be racial or possibly homophobic) or is it just racial?

The Telegraph are specific with their opinion on the subject. It's hard to prove either way simply because everyone has a different opinion on the meaning behind the words sang in the 'Sol Sol wherever you may be' chant. If someone is overtly racist, then good luck to the police and I hope they arrest and charge them. No place for it anywhere in life, and football fans should not be exempt from it at football grounds across the country. To be clear - I'm talking about racism, not ambiguous misinterpreted words.

All this publicity and police investigation is really down to one thing. Sol Campbell and his crusade. Two things, never separated, and co-existing as a singular pain in everyone's arse.

The amount of chants in football tinged with homophobic references is aplenty. Not right you might argue, but its common place. Ask Ashley Cole. Ask anyone. But has that been spoken about at all in the midst of all this as much as the alleged racist element?

Campbell has always banged on about all Spurs fans being racist and that's why they boo and abuse him. And that's it. That's the crux of it. His fragile ego can't cope, so he points his finger and rather mention the gay slurs (which, he should think about doing, or is it okay for fans to sing homophobic chants?) he decides that Spurs fans sing that 'Sol Sol' song because he's black and us Yids we hate the blacks. So lets get all KKK about it and sing about those pesky blacks but only when Campbell is playing and only mentioning Campbell's name. I guess we are the worst type of racists, the type that discriminate hypocritically by hating black Sol Campbell but loving black Ledley King. In fact the only black we hate is Campbell. White supremacy at it's very finest.

Have I made it sarcastically clear enough how ridiculous these accusations are?

Maybe 'indecent chanting' will cover off the homophobic chanting on the sly, and maybe Campbell has complained about this. Or maybe the authorities have jumped on the hype the media spun on the back of the original incident.

Again (and for the 1000th time), I'm not saying I like or have sang any of these songs. Its not my bag at all. And that other song sang by the idiot minority about Adebayor is overtly racist, but the idiots who sing it think its funny and probably don't have the brains to realise singing about washing elephants is a chant too far. I know for a fact that Spurs (stewards) have removed people for singing this during games. I've yet to hear Adebayor complain about it, but hope he does. Mido was subject to abuse recently also (again) and arrests have been made. This in particular warrants far more publicity than this Campbell carnival.

Hated for his colour - Red

The majority of Tottenham fans are way above all this and are far more simplistic with their honesty by calling Campbell a Judas or a c*nt. Which is our right to do, and before anyone gets all self-righteous about how 'you wouldn't expect to get away with calling someone a c*nt in the street so why would you expect to get away with it at a football match' - don't bother. Players except this as part and parcel of football. The day someone shouts out 'Ronaldo! I don't like you mate' is the day we slowly and gently lower football into a deep grave and shed a tear for our dear departed friend.

There's no need to put the hatred for Campbell into a fucking song. And the media and police and everyone else who want to slate Spurs fans over this should get that flux capacitor out of the bottom drawer and go back several years when Campbell played for Arsenal at WHL and got an incredible reception of abuse. No 'Sol Sol hanging from a tree' chants back then. Just your common working class mans screaming and shouting and swearing. And what does our very own Benedict Arnold do? He tells the press that the abuse was racially motivated. Had nothing to do with him walking from Spurs to Arsenal on a free and everything to do with race and colour of skin.

Fuck off mate. Just fuck the fuck off. Even the likes of Ian Wright along with one or two other ex-players don't see what Campbell appears to see.

He shat on the club, doesn't accept he did and doesn't understand why fans dislike him. If the minority of Spurs fans who are still obsessed with this non-entity had any self-respect they would just ignore him completely. Although I guess if they did that, Sol Campbell would actually believe we have forgiven him.

We live in such a PC world that anything like this will be scrutinised and exaggerated and people will be made an example of, even though other instances which are obviously racist are completely ignored - by police and the media - because they don't score highly in what they believe to be their own agendas and publicity ratings.

Maybe, the few who had their photos taken by the police at that Pompey game need to be 'sacrificed' so that it deters others from actually saying something truly racist, not questionable or subjective, but something that's blatantly black or white.

Challenge Spurs™ - Long live the King

Challenge Spurs™ Series

Game 08 v (A) West Ham United
2-0 win, 3 points
Total points: 18
Position: 15th

Julian Dicks, Tony Cottee, Billy Bonds, Frank Lampard Senior, Danny Dyer, Russell Brand, Ray Winstone, The Krays, Phil and Grant, Jellied Eels, Burberry, Lego castles, Knees up mother brown, Dick van Dyke, Nigel Winterburn, Scott Parker, Green Street, lasagne, Carlito Tevez, The Academy of Football, Frodo Baggins....can you hear me Frodo Baggins? Your boys took one hell of a beating! Your boys took one hell of a beating!

*Cough*

Not the greatest London Derby ever. Ranks somewhere between average and ordinary. But a win is a win is a win, right? New improved Spurs can lose a game, and then follow it up with an away win. Something all too difficult for so many transitional Lilywhite sides in the past 10 years. Not that this is the dawn of a new age or anything spectacular. Living simply in the present, survival (dramatic word right there) is still paramount. We know, and so does everyone else, that we will not get relegated because there are other teams with next to little hope of getting out of their current predicaments. Harry Redknapp is no longer available. But glad to see the likes of Woodgate still refer to a 'relegation battle'.

That type of self-awareness and respect for our current situation helps satisfy any questions about the mentality of the squad. They know its far from done and dusted and that type of attitude will see us fine. Christ knows what the attitude was when Ramos was in charge, although the blame could be split 50/50 with the players. Juande was today appointed the new Madrid boss (for anyone who has not been paying attention). Sideways step there for the Special Juan.

Nothing sideways about Spurs at Upton Park. At least by the end of the game there wasn't. Pretty non-descript first half. West Ham pretty in possession but fuck all else. Zola attempting to get his players to play Italian style. Someone needs a word in his ear that you need quality players to get away with that type of football.

Spurs with the better chances (Pav hitting the post being the closest we got). Second half, we were resolute and determined. And simply better in every way in comparison to the little team from Green Street. Aaron 'I really do have some end product' Lennon crossing for Ledley 'my knee is knackered but I'm still better than most' King who duly headed the ball downwards into the ground and over the despairing reach of Rob Green. The second goal came from a counter after Gomes brilliantly saved twice (first save was good, second was actually down to the ball being struck straight at him by DiMichele, but let's just reveal in the moment) and off down the other end of the pitch we went where O'Hara hit a sweet shot giving Green no chance for the second time in the game.

Average, ordinary game? Yes. Only one team ever likely to win it? Yes. Harry keeps up his 100% winning record when returning to West Ham. And we move up to 15th, above West Ham, who have spent the best part of this season laughing at our plight. That irony is a right bastard. Proper in-your-face c*nt.

Why so serious?

General observations from the game:

Pav. Played upfront on his own, didn't hold up the ball that well but you could argue that hoofing the ball to him isn't the cleverest of things tactically. He's a bit slow which became more than apparent when the pacey Bent came on. Much better suited in a 4-4-2 where he is more likely to cause a bit of havoc 'running around' alongside Darren.

Lennon and Corluka owning their side of the pitch. Some decent flank play from the pair of them. Lennon beginning to prove he ain't no one trick bling pony. And Corluka proving he was a very astute buy. Who bought him again? *blush*. Defence played very well and dealt with everything that Cole and Bellamy throw at them. Although I could deal with those two myself. Bellamy looks shot to pieces. Cole is all heart no skill.

When West Ham did manage to get a shot on target, reborn of confidence, Gomes, smiled and collected the ball. Comfortable. Talking of 'shot to pieces', Bentley is...shot to pieces. Here is a player who fancies himself a bit. There's nothing wrong in that. Beckham, in a very understated way, fancied himself. Ronaldo, in the most obvious way, fancies the fuck out of himself. But both have a right to because they are great players. Bentley is at best a very good player, but not the most consistent and definitely nowhere near being great. So what we have is a £16M player who is trying to play from memory of how a great player should be playing. Harry needs a blatant word in his ear. I'd personally slap him across the face and shave his head. He needs to start bringing it and starting with the basics (simple passing, set pieces that deliver) will do just fine for us.

West Ham's new academy players did little to impress

As for Jenas. The enigma is just that. Did he play well? Did he play ok? Did he play poorly? What does he do? What does he bring to the team? I don't know anymore. No matter what, if fit, he seems to play. Do we miss something the manager(s) sees? Much like Carrick, Jenas has qualities that some of us fail to appreciate from the stands. The donkey work and unsexy running around. And the qualities he does have (bursting from midfield, box-to-box energy) is not always on show. He goes missing. Sometimes he shows up. Sometimes he tackles. Sometimes he's invisible. Nobody has come close to taking this young man and instilling arrogant confidence and awareness in his abilities.

Redknapp has a lot of work to sort out both Jermaine and David. The luxury of another £16M Comolli signing to dull over the pain will not be forthcoming.Talking of Comolli signings...Zokora. Shocking, utterly shocking. He played reasonably well. Even gave us one of his trademark runs and shots, this time hitting the shot on target.Yeah, I know, it happened because I saw it and there were cameras there and it was on tv, so screw you if you think I'm making this up. I'll keep you posted on any random drug tests that may have been conducted after the game. Because seriously, bizarro world or what? His pace is staggering at times and if its somehow possible to improve his decisio making a little, his performances may even continue to improve. Smile on his face, heart on sleeve, Didier is enjoying his football and has a willingness that others have (and some still) lack. But before you get a tattoo of his face on your back, let's remember that his passing ability is poor and is one-footed.

Carlton...Cole....I can't look away.....help me...

And then we have Modric. I predicted we would win if he played. Minute or so in, and he should have scored. Bit rusty, didn't strike his shot with any venom or placement. Tame effort at the keeper. But no problem. He was different class to anyone out on the pitch (yes, we know that's probably not saying much). Luka is a quality player who has taken a while to adjust to life in the Prem, which was always going to be the case. He's poor form in the early part of the season was mainly due to the disaster of a start we had. Now the team is winning games (9 out of 12) and he has some protection and team-mates who work as a cohesive unit, he is free to roam and playmake. He has yet to score for us, but his vision, touch and movement is just as important. Without him, we can't keep hold of the ball. With him? Possessions nine tenths of the law. He is our new Berbatov. Smaller, no floppy hair and moody face. No goals, but enough creative spark to see us have a possible 'world class' player to fill the void left by the Bulgarian. Give him another 3-4 months and with Pav hopefully settled to London life - we'll have more than enough to smile about.

King was his majestic self. Cameo performances seem to be what we are limited to nowadays. Harry after the game spoke about how Ledders is a great lad and its shame about his knee. It was a little bit of a downer. Almost felt like Harry was telling us that Ledley will never recover from his knee problems so over time (another season or two?) he might play fewer and fewer games and retirement will be the only option. Where do you find another King from? Uncertain about his availability for Saturday. Fingers crossed.

As for our opponents. Toothless. Lacked any passion, much like the atmosphere in parts. For all their hype about how important this game is for their fans ("Everyone in the dressing room is now raring to go against Tottenham on Monday night. It is the biggest match of the season for our fans and we all know what it means for us to get a result over our London rivals. We will be going all out to try and achieve that" - Lucas Neill) they hardly showed any of that spirit in the 90 minutes that matter the most. Their midfield was poor. One win in ten? Oh well. Being below us is their rightful place, no? That way when they do go above us, they can pop the champers again and celebrate like its 1999.

West Ham's norty mob, in their manner

If any Spurs fan wants to mass-email the league table along with a quote or three from any number of messages received about 4 weeks back - including photos of road signs and jokes about triangles, please feel free to do so. It's a give and take world we live in. So make sure you fucking well give it.

Challenge Spurs™ - Stats Update

8 Played.
5 wins.
1 draw.
2 defeats.

16 points.

4 games left in the Challenge Spurs™ Dirty Dozen series. When I started this, the challenge was as follows:

• 30 points minimum by January 1st
• 12 games
• 6 at home
• 6 away
• 36 possible points

If we win the final four games, we'll have 28 points in total from these 12 games, plus the two points we started with, giving us 30 points. At the time, based on our position and what was happening around us, it was very much a do or die (where have I heard that before?) conundrum. 30 points from 36 is European-challenging form, so it was a huge ask. If we write off Saturdays game against Utd, and say we win the final 3 games, that will give us 25 points from the series, and a total of 27. And with the table the way it is, that should see us with plenty of breathing space (not mathematically impossible to get dragged back into it, but far more of a comfort zone for us).

For now, tilt the head ever so slight upwards to stop the nosebleed.

Yet another caption competition

"Gomes prepared to catch anything to prove his worth"

Modric's first match-day visit to the Lane

"See that way up there? That's the Champions League. You can get to it via Manchester. But don't worry yourself about that until the summer of 2010."

Beard Update

As per a previous blog entry, I made an announcement that I am growing a beard. Hobo chic at its finest. Minus the chic.

At the moment its more of a mess of a stubble than it is a genuine beard. Need another 2 weeks of growth at the very least before I decide whether I can get away with this travesty of fashion for much longer. Got some grey hairs to the left of my chin, giving me an almost Roy Keanesque quality which does nothing to make it look even 1% appealing. I look like the lovechild of a tramp and the wolf-man after a night on Special Brew having had parts of my face shaved off by other tramps in a prank-attack then tried to smarten up with another tramps piss in (what proves to be) a successful attempt to get into Chinawhite.

But the beard has to stay until Spurs are mathematically safe from relegation. Although (cheat mode activated) I'm going to change it to, '...until Spurs are more or less safe based on league position and the form of whomever is bottom three and the likelihood of being pulled back down into the dogfight'.

I'm so zany.

What a West Ham fan said to me on Saturday night...

'It's do or die'.

Seriously, get a fucking grip mate.

He's bricking it due to abuse he dished out to Spurs fans about certain Ramos inspired relegation (pre-Redknapp) and was gutted when 'arry took over and is even more gutted now due to the fact that what people felt was a given is now a shared reality between several clubs from mid-table downwards, including Zola's claret and blue.

Reminded me how bloody dramatic all us lot were with our knee-jerked reactions to possible life in The Championship.

Still, if we lose at Upton Park and then lose again to Man Utd at home then we might get sucked into the bottom three again. But we'll be safe. Along with West Ham. Thanks mainly to the form of Sunderland, Newcastle, WBA and Blackburn.

Dazza

1700: What an afternoon for Darren Anderton. In his final game before retiring, the former England winger scores an 88th-minute winner for Bournemouth against Chester. That's how to bow out. (from the Beeb).

Nice one Dazza. Nice one son.