Petrov signs for City

Some Spurs fans are concluding that Spurs were never in for him. They cant believe for a second he would choose them over us, considering his mate Berbatov plays in Lilywhite and considering we have UEFA Cup football and are generally in a far better state then they are ( City are are rebuilding from scratch).

If we were genuinely not interested then, why? He plays with Berbatov at International level. He has a proven track record. He's a big game player. And he's available.

If we were genuinely interested in him and he rejected us, then this simply illustrates that we dither far too long with signing players.

The left-sided 'problem' remains unresolved. I await to say what all the 'In the Know' gollums have to say about this 'nearly' signing.

Name and Shame

Apparently, in some bar in Loughton, Mr Lennon (pished) was 'aving it large and telling everyone he doesn’t care what people say (with regards to his drinking) and that he Spurs pushed him out of the club because of his behaviour he would be 'ok' because plenty of clubs would be happy to take him on.

Right, firstly, what a fucking crock of shite. This 'rumour/story/exclusive' is simply a bunch of text posted on an Internet forum. It serves no purpose other than to stir up fan opinion against the young urbanish r'n'b hobbit like winger.

Firstly, people in all walks of life with jobs with responsibility go out and destroy their livers on booze or worse. And I've seen no evidence that Lennon is painting the pavement with carrot coloured flavor. He's a young lad who has been photographed a couple of times out on the town and people who either see or snap a photo of him are quick to add in a quote in order to make it all a bit more interesting.

Its cool to be a footballer

I'll give you an example. I saw Jade Goody at Harlow shopping last week. She was with some random bloke (obviously her designated driver) and Jack (her bloke). She walked past me flicking her hair with a look that read 'Yes, its me'.

That's it. Nothing else happened. Now, if I was inclined to shit-stir I'd go posting on a BB forum that I saw her (the truth) and that she was fighting off abuse from other shoppers who were calling her a daft bint (the lie).

You can call this lie 'The Prestige'. A fabrication that gives the truth some weight for it to get noticed when it gets posted.

This type of propaganda is very much what The Agents of Levy partake in. It incites negative energy towards a player.

In this case, the aim would be for fans to turn against the talented Lennon so that when Levy sells him to a rival club (for a substantial amount of dosh) we wont be too fussed. We'll all be:

"Yeah, that Lennon is a proper little Greavise off the pitch with the booze....good riddance"

As (currently) the only active member of the League of Lilywhites, I hereby denounce this bullshit story as bullshit.

Avid readers of this blog will point out that I have been a stern disapprover of the Bling Squad that has developed at the Lane and would like to clearly state that I was quick to judge certain players.

Enjoying the odd beverage in-between training should not be an issue of public concern. The Bling Squad should be allowed to party on as long as performances on the pitch are of a high quality.

I'll be keeping an eye out for any developments of this 'story' on Lennon and will critically attack any member of any Spurs forum who attacks Lennon.

The League Of Lilywhites will NAME AND SHAME.

A Public Apology to Birmingham City FC

It would appear that Mido and Ghaly are back with Spurs training and that the proposed £9M transfer is off. Apparently the glitch concerns the players failing to agree personal terms with the Blues. I'm guessing Bruce and Gold rejected Midos request of a win bonus made up of cheesburgers and fries.

Birmingham playing hard-ball with the two players? Christ, I fucking hope so. They have been the only club to show any interest in the pair, so if they have given up we might be stuck with them.

Petrov on his way, Shirely?

He's meeting with his agent and Comolli today. Levy has apparently delayed flying out to South Africa in order to help conclude the deal.

Therefore, if the deal fails I will hold him personally responsible for pro-longing the left-side problem we've had for the best part of forever.

Orlando Pirates v Spurs

2-1 win, which included a goal from our pre-season gem, Wayne Routledge, once more showing the kind of eye for goal that results with Martin Jol farming him out to an average Premiership side for a season.

Sublime 50-yard pass from Huddlestone to set up Bent who notched up another pre-season goal.

Again, I'm not going to dissect the team and players performance. Its a friendly. Yes, its partly competitive but its still a friendly.

Though special mention to Cerny in goal who looked very comfortable and saved a spot-kick twice, before the rather daft ref asked for it to be taken a 3rd time (no stopping it). His movement looked perfectly legal to me. Strange decision but inconsequential.

Rose

The young lad is still apparently on his way to us. Has the same agent has Lennon and Huddlestone, so should be the new member of the Bling Squad anytime soon.

Oh, and he's a Spurs fan apparently. Hmmm. Much in the same way as Teddy Sheringham supports West Ham.

Liverpool are/were interested, but he's got his heart set on drinking with Aaron and Tommy.

At the age of 17, not too sure how much of a part he will play this coming season. Off the pitch, I'm sure he will look dapper in designer chav gear.

Dire Levy?

Apparently we are interested in Kieron Dyer. That’s the one that doesn't do much for £80k per week, other than shit in the goldfish bowl. Does this rumour consist of any elements of truth juice or is it simply a glass of donkey spunk? And if so, who is holding the glass and would they consider drinking from it to validate the story?

If this transfer was to occur, which would mean that aliens have taken over the brains of the manager, sporting director and chairman at WHL (because surely even they are incapable of agreeing this would be money well spent) then the only resolution would be for me to bring the end of days upon this great civilization we live in.

I’m placing my money on this being nothing more than mis-direction.

£6M 'Dollar' Man

Mido is set for a £6M move to Birmingham, rather than the original one-year loan with an option to buy him out right.

Brummies sign Mido for 6 big ones.
Mido goes for Six Million.
Six Million Mido joins the Blues.
Jol has six million reasons to be happy.
Mido worth £6M in Blues deal.

No matter how I write the news, I still can't quite grasp how we have managed to get so much for someone so bloated. Oh, hold up. Of course. TV money.

Steve Bruce and the Birmingham board

I don't go with the current knee-jerk 'goodbye' reactions of some Spurs fans wishing him luck. He played decent for us 3 or 4 times, doing what any forward player ought to be doing playing for the first team.

So what if he scored a brace on his debut. Fucking 'ell, anyone would think we won silverware that day. He is six million miles away from being a model pro. Good riddance.

Seems that Ghaly will follow Mido to the Blues, for half the amount.

Shame that we wont be spending any of the cash on the 5 or so players we have been linked with recently.

No Boateng or SWP or Petrov (though the former is a done deal according to some 'insiders'. Not heard that one before).

Anyways.....

It’s all quiet on the Western front at the moment. Haven't had much time to visit the Lodge recently, but intend to do so in the next few days, especially with all the transfer gossip doing the rounds. SWP is apparently due to make an appearance in the next few days. Also, I need to make an appearance myself – without a utility belt and camouflage clothing – to prove that I am not presenting myself with the purpose to incite any legal proceedings.

The League of Lilywhites is a long term project, so will once more update you all with the current membership standings and a preview of the agenda. Also hope to unveil the badge of honour.

The season isn’t too far off now. I suppose the current tranquillity is nothing more than the calm before the storm. There’s no point in shooting my load too soon. Best to wait till after both 'pipes' have been cleaned out and I lean forward for the moneyshot. Levy will get it in the face. If deserved of course. And that’s in a bad way, not a ‘well done, here’s the prize baby’ way. I know that the moneyshot is deemed demeaning in porn, but within the fantasy it’s meant to be what the taker wants from the giver. In this case, the moneyshot is my fury and aiming it a Levy is for the purpose of demonstration and disapproval, something he doesn't want the displeasure of wiping away from his face. If Spurs do badly, then Levy will get it from me. Not an actual moneyshot. I'm talking about a stern letter and possibly graffiti on the West Stand. So in this case my moneyshot is made of A4 paper and paint. Not quite pineapple but the aim is to leave a bitter taste in his mouth.

Look, my point is that Levy should be on guard. Just because it’s a little sleepy at the moment and my visits to his estate are non-existent, it doesn’t mean that I’m not ready to pounce, like a jaguar with a hard-on. By hard-on, I’m talking metaphorically...

Latest Whorage

Kevin Prince Boateng's move has stalled. Apparently we are attempting to stagger payments for the player due to his injury record. Has been spotted in London as recent as yesterday, so should still happen.

SWP. Well, according the Daily Mirror, Kenyon doesn’t want to sell him to us because we might be capable of challenging for the title in a couple of seasons. Doubtful this is true. Chelsea fans are scared of us, but at management level they are way too arrogant to bother with the little teams. Another interesting sidenote is that Kenyon has also apparently commented that if Spurs and another club matched Chelsea’s valuation of the player, Wright-Phillips would choose Spurs. Don’t expect anything to happen on this till the scum return from their US tour.

Danny Rose. Done and dusted.

Petrov. Depends what you believe. Some say this will happen if we don’t sign SWP, even though they play on opposite sides of the wing. Has always been linked to us. Unclear on whether this is just press speculation or mis-direction from the club.

Rodrigo Palacio

You might have read something in the press about him. Argentine goal-ace who plays his football for Boco. Arsenal were rumoured to be preparing a £15M bid for him, all according to 'reports from South America'. All the media covered the story of how the player had rejected Barcelona (not wanting to play second-fiddle to Henry) and was now set to join the club from Woolwich.

'Ideal replacement' for Henry. Best striker in Argentina.

Oh hum. Its turned out to be a fake story. Yes, the player is real. His transfer to the Prem isn't.

The 'story' was probably made up on an Internet message board and once more proves what utter mugs the British press are, willing to copy and paste anything to help sell papers for cheap football headline frills and 'I told you so' rights so they can print photos of their previous exclusive article a week later to prove to everyone that they broke the story first.

Pathetic. Its one continuous mugging off session for 'Englands finest' red tops, which will end when the transfer window shuts.

Enjoy it.

A seed was planted and a beautiful Rose grew from it

First Lennon for the right wing. And now Danny Rose for the left wing. We are set to return to Leeds Utd to once more pluck an up and coming young potential star. And this one has a left foot. Though at 17 years of age, I doubt he is the immediate answer to the required midfield balance.

Still, once more (unless I just jinxed it) we buy young and British. And if this kid is as good as they say he is, its another one for the future. Another 'get out of jail' card for Levy who has amounted a great collection of young would-be-star players who he could sell-on for plenty of cash in the future, if our over-spending (and no Champions League) comes back to bite a big far chunk out of our backsides.