Summer is almost upon us...

...so brace yourselves for the opening of the transfer window and the army of a thousand 'in the knows' that will bloody their sword in battle.

I adore the fact that so many people claim to have contacts/deep throats (or know someone who is connected in some wishy washy way) within the recently reinforced walls of White Hart Lane (if you believe the ITK that suggested Levy has tightened security of transfer shenanigans to a need-to-know basis).

All the information passed on from said insider(s) is then shared with the online community without hesitation. Although considering Harry Redknapp tells everybody via press conference who we're looking at it's hardly ground breaking stuff when something from within is then leaked into the public domain and is duplicated in half a dozen news streams. Guillem Balague also busy with the La Liga connections today (Osvaldo anyone?).

When the ITK's do let us know what's happening at the club, the information differs (in some cases vastly) from one to the next. So that's basically 40-50 people involved at the club at varying levels of employment who are privy to conflicting information (if notes were compared) and are all willing to share with people outside of the club that either use message boards or pass on the info to someone who does, resulting with rich ambiguity and canny cryptics of the transfer deal at hand. Yet rarely can any one ITK nail it beyond absolute doubt with definitive clarity. Then again, perhaps that's the point. Grapevine, whispers and misinformation.

Strangely, I can never force myself to look away. Probably because I need the material to work my way through the months before pre-season begins.

I've been privy to some information in the past (hasn't everybody?) although I know not a single person working for the club. The information was agent/player related and to be honest heavily dosed in salt. I've also been privy to other pointless whispers. But hardly any of it relevant to the necessity to know something before it happens even though if it happens you'll know about it regardless. Better left to the professionals.

Considering the variables at play and the limited scenarios that can potentially play out, if you throw enough **** at the wall, some of it will stick.

This summer the aim is to simply find the gem in amongst the rehashed echos of the prognosticative and the bleeding obvious and crown it as the definitive example, absolute clarity that Daniel Levy's Lilywhite walls have been penetrated and the juicy secret has oozed out into the wild.

I'm drowning in hypocrisy but I don't care. Follow the updates here:

ITK thread 2011/12

4 wins. 99 years.

Spurs win at Anfield. Arsenal lose again. 10,000 travelling claret and blue fans watch West Ham United get relegated. Oh and what’s this? Jessica Alba naked in my bedroom, seductively requesting I join her for frivolous antics between the bed sheets. What a sensational weekend. Almost makes you want to daydream about the performance against City with an alternative ending. What if, what if. Such a fine line between loving/hating the gaffer these days. But at least we've got ourselves a pocket of pride after a painful run that's lacked it in abundance.

From a CL play-off to a Europa League variant at the home of the best tannoy system in the land (not working on Sunday, hence the lack of home support vocals). Post-match Harry has admitted scaring the team to victory, reminding them the passage into Europe via Fair Play would mean a very early start to pre-season. Shame a similar ploy wasn't used pro-actively during the past couple of months to inspire avoidance of the far from sexy Europa League. You live and learn.

Immaculate performances of beastly awesomeness from the likes of Sandro, Modric and Rose. And Ledley King. Seven months out and he basically owned the pitch. Such was the comfort of his display. Okay, perhaps he wasn’t 100% slick and styled but seven months people...seven months! He has not right, surely?

Of course he has the right. He's the King, he can do whatever he likes.

There’s no doubting the fact that if Ledley did not suffer from the degradation of his knee he would be one of the world’s best. He’s still one of the world’s best if you wish to take note of his performance by games played ratio.

He hardly plays. When he does, he oozes unparalleled ability. Little surprise then that he also brings the best out of Dawson (to the right of King in central defence). The man is a colossus. And a conundrum. We don’t know what’s going on behind closed doors and whether he’s finally been advised to consider retirement. King himself is looking forward with positivity, as ever. He never wants to give into his reoccuring plight. What his performance does illustrate is the importance of having some of his quality at the back throughout the season.

Stats tell us that we’ve conceded 66 goals in the 44 games that Ledley has not been present. That equates to an average of 1.5 goals conceded per game. Compared to the six conceded in the eight games he’s started, which is an average of 0.75 per game.

As much as we all bang on about needing a forward we equally need to do some hefty work to sign someone of similar ilk to King. Not an easy task. I’m thinking long term here (Gallas has another season with us at the very least and wont be ever present next term through-out all comps). Steven Caulker might be the answer. We’ll know more post-summer transfer window (that’s a hope rather than a prediction).

So, what of the game?

I was surprised Liverpool were so limp in terms of offensive pressure. Granted, they had chances. Wasted ones. Carroll doing his best to appease my disappointment we didn't sign anyone back in Jan. And any of the pre-match hullabaloo about not signing Suarez was washed away thanks to a rather inept performance by the player who spent most of the game reminding us of those other qualities. The ones Howard Webb preferred to ignore. I bet if that was Daws kicking Suarez, the Uruguayan would still be rolling around now with Daws reflecting on a red card. Suarez probably would have rolled all the way to Albert Docks. Regardless, Dawson had him comfortably set to ineffectual. All that was left for him and his mate Maxi was to periodically dive their way through the ninety minutes.

Webb’s inconsistency did however award us a rather soft penalty. Not sure, are we allowed to accept such generosity in the back garden of one of the original Sky Sports Top 4 clubs? Feels dirty. The penalty made it 2-0. The first goal was a wonderful effort (aided by deflection) by van der Vaart who kissed his badge in celebration. A sure sign he’s had a contract offer delivered via Old Trafford. Good solid performance from the Dutchman before going off injured.

Rose, again impressive in another left-back cover-role. Kid might have a future as BAE's understudy. Based on three games. No, no. I'm certain we're onto something here and we are not an over-excitable bunch of fans who will not turn on him when he eventually does make a mistake. Which he will. Human, after all.

We didn’t create too much else in clear cut chances (Crouch and Defoe up front). We didn’t over-power Liverpool. We simply contained them and played out the game in relative comfort. Clean sheet people, clean sheet.

Sandro (got a yellow when others in red shirts deserved them more but got away with it) proving our scouts can get it right. The perfect partner for Modric in the middle, who continues to make us tick (70 out of 74 passes completed, that’s 95% accuracy - destroy all carrier-pigeons leaving Manchester and heading towards N17).

For those taking notes, that’s also another hoodoo beaten by Redknapp (Old Trafford and Stamford Bridge the only two battle fields left to conquer). First win there for 18 years. First double over Liverpool since ’87. But then I’m sure you’ll counter it by reminding everyone that Liverpool are still in a state of flux (be it in a good state currently), requiring additional new blood to improve to even consider competing for a top four place. Our away form continues to impress. Our home form is where we’ve stuttered. I'd still be looking up at City and the rest rather than looking down at Liverpool and...nobody else.

Liverpool finishing below us might hinder them in the transfer window or it might not. Europa football not as appealing as that other competition. Guess it comes down to whether we are far more decisive in the transfer window than Comolli is who will no doubt spearhead the project at hand (the enticement of history on their side, see Joe Cole for example).

It's a fine line, regardless of what you might think of Harry and his mouth and the other issues of potential transfer targets (please no West Ham rejects please) – we’re still in good health. I’m right, am I not?

For all his contradictions and his relentless protection of his ego and the half-truths, his record still remains impressive. Just not as impressive as it could have been. And he knows it. And he's not doing a good job managing the fallout. Although it will no doubt be forgotten about with the summer almost upon us and Harry will want to prove the doubters wrong with yet another positive twist. Perhaps top four and a cup. Come on, it's hardly the moon on a stick.

Will be interesting to see if we start next season as the underdogs or he comes out and states clearly and without confusion: Top 4 is the target. Aim high Tottenham.

Talking of the summer, Harry according to Harry, has already started to scout (he was recently in France). I'm sure you'll all be inspired by this gem in reference to strikers: "It's very difficult finding better than what you've already got"

Oh crap, Jessica’s head is morphing into Harry’s ala Aphex Twin ‘Windowlicker’ video. I knew this was too good to be true.

One game left. 5^th spot, in our hands to lose. Much like 4th spot was. Onwards. To dare is to get three points at home in the final game of the season and continue the 'run' into the 2012 season.

COYS.

Things Harry Redknapp will say next

First there was the epic “I'm going to go and commit suicide, it's so sad”. Then he delivered the punchy “99.9 per cent of people who go to Tottenham have loved everything they’ve seen. That’s all that matters” and the exquisite “They’re idiots who don’t even watch football".

DML and Spurs fans on Twitter present to you...things Harry Redknapp will say next.

"Bill Nicholson led this club to the double, but he didn't have the handicap of two points from eight games"

Speaking on Oprah Winfrey: "The reason the NDP is non-viable is because there's no room for my statue"

"Spurs fans need to wake up and smell the coffee. If I wasn't appointed boss they'd be sitting midtable in league one"

"I established the club in 1882. Some "Fans" seem to forget that..."

"When I left they had 3 points from 8 games. Triffic compared to where they were when I started"

"Spurs will not be signing any players from La Liga. And up after the break on Sky Sports News, Jim White will be with us"

"Top nine finish is superb for them, superb for this club. Remember, they were bottom when I arrived. Two points from..."

"Look, all I did was unzip and urinate in their direction. I wasn't technically speaking aiming at the home support"

"Two points, eight games, two points, eight games, two points, eight games, two points, eight games"

Harry on potential signings: "I like that Revisita La Norther Premier Hotpoint League. That's the standard of player we'll go for"

"I did tell the FA all about my minor indiscretions when I took the job"

"Yeah, he's a good lad that Tony Cottee. He'll be fantastic upfront with Crouchie with Billy Bonds slotting into midfield"

"I didn't lose today, they did, them lot. Spurs. Nothing to do with me is it?"

"What I'm going to do to celebrate 3 wins from 13 games? Not much, probably just go home and have a bacon sarnie and walk the dogs"

"Crouchie and Defoe, unlucky not to score. Not our day. England fans should be happy. Quarter-final? I'd have taken that"

"I love a bit of wheeling and dealing, it's what makes football proper"

#futurearryquotes

Ain't no pleasing you

guest-blog by Chris King

When is it no longer acceptable to complain? To moan about a service provided, an experience gained or an attitude presented to you?

What makes it unacceptable? Do you have to take in to consideration everything that has gone before – to apply a “mus’n’ grumble” attitude to everything you do – as hey, there is always going to be someone far worse off than you; someone below you – way below you.

When do you hand over your right to complain? As soon as UEFA doles out their 30 pieces of TV silver; or does it go back further than that – to Eastlands last term, to when Harry signed, to when Jason Dozzell went back east?

This is the picture currently being presented to Spurs fans – fans who feel they want to exercise their right to politely point out where the team has gone wrong over the last couple of months. To comment, complain even criticise (lick windows and howl at the moon as some in the media are suggesting us “nutters” do). Yet we are being reliably informed that we are clueless; that we have no right to moan about this past season – as this is the best it has ever been (since circa Sky and all that).

Swallow your penance, shut up and accept your lot.

But what if you are one of those book learning types; you know – those that can read. Can look at a set of results, the names in a squad; understand maths sufficiently well to add up points that could (read: should) have been gained against those clubs below yours. What if you then came to the conclusion that all was not right? That something had gone wrong; horribly wrong – and the slight swagger you presented to the world back in March – was now a hunched shuffle, which had you sloping back in to the pack – to where most believe you truly belong.

City beating us was no great shock last night – eggs, paper bags, and the geek’s even nerdy dad could have Spurs in a rumble right about now. Yet if you read twitter last night, or skimmed through the obituaries – sorry – I mean match reports this morning - you’d think we were just popping off cloud nine for a pint of milk, a decent keeper; and we’ll be back amongst the big boys before next season was but a few weeks old.

It was official – we weren’t allowed to complain. We weren’t allowed to pluck figures like one win in 10 (I appreciate it’s more, I just like round figures) out of the cold, hard facts. We weren’t allowed to comment on the apparent lack of desire at times against West Ham, West Brom or Blackpool. 

We weren’t allowed to question the tactical acumen applied to the team selection in those game, or last night – or the switches made, and the personnel introduced. 

Unbeknown to Spurs fans, a new law was passed across the land placing the penalty of treason on any negative comments directed at the Red Top’s new “King of Hearts”. Harry is lauded as a very good manager who had a bad run with a few dodgy decisions, sendings off, injuries – it was always someone else’s fault.

But what if we want to complain? What’s stopping us?

Well there’s the ever so slightly patronising undertone that we’ve been shockingly bad for so long that, To Dare – is apparently above us. We should be happy with the fact that we’ve beaten AC and Inter Milan – we’ve had a run in the Champions League that no one expected of us, and that we took our beating against Madrid like men.

If there’s a Spurs fan out there that can’t find a positive from the season, then there is a little more than something wrong with them – and in fairness, to those baying for Harry’s head, only Vicente del Bosque would get the sack after some of our European results this term – but there is no disputing that our season was derailed sometime in March – and if we can’t moan, then at least let us ask why it all went so wrong?

I don’t buy in to the notion that the European experience did for us. We’ve been all over clubs at times – West Ham at home, City home and away – and what have we got to show for it? If we can’t criticise Harry, do we point the finger of blame at Dear Mr Levy? – who is so cunning in his transfer bargaining that he left us a striker light, and gave us Pieenar – a player who appears to have left what form he had, back up in Liverpool – no doubt a victim of that gang that targets the prized possessions of their local players.

But we can’t moan – nor question. So what do we do? We do what all Spurs fans do at such times, we argue with each other. If no one is prepared to listen, we find someone to at least shout over the top of on the same subject matter; though for once, we all seem to be shouting the same things.

No Journos will return our tweets, opposition fans only see the folly in our arguments – we’re no longer the darlings – back to being the overly expectant, laughing stock we’ve been since the ‘80s.

If last season delivered the earth, this season promised the moon and the stars as well. There was, daft as it now seems - the faint glimmer that we might even be the club to take the title race in to May. Looking at our last 13 league games, the teams we’ve played and the points we dropped – would it really have been so daft?

Though I guess it is not really our fault. United, Chelsea and Arsenal are where they supposedly belong – City have bought their place at the top table, and Liverpool – well, they’re just the Liverpool of old; same efficiency, same manager, same reliance on the back pass to the keeper. So if it feels like we robbed ourselves of glory; chances are it just wasn’t meant to be.

So if you feel like moaning – ask yourself a few questions: are we better than we were under Francis? Have we enjoyed some fantastic European nights down the lane this term? If the Red Tops want Harry for England, surely he’s still the man for us, right? If we’d have won half of those last 13 games, would we be back in the Champions League next year?

Actually, don’t ask that last question; it’ll only cause you to question, to moan….. To ultimately, be wrong!

Chris King, a regular on the old Shelf and held a season ticket in the Park Lane Upper. He now lives in Leeds, where he spends most Saturdays trying to teach his daughter the words to Spurs’ songs. Writes for In Bed with Maradona and his own blog Northern Writes.

Next season, anyone?

Not sure at the moment what is more depressing. Manchester City's style of football, the fact the 1-0 loss was one of our better performances yet summed up our season thanks to the lack of cutting edge or the irony that Crouch completed his trilogy - scored the goal to get us into the CL at Eastlands 1-0, red card in Madrid pivotal to us getting knocked-out, OG at Eastlands 1-0. Quadruple in fact if you include his goals against Young Boys.

Better team on the night, second best across the season in terms of accumulating those all important points. Reason for failure? Lack of those all important goals. Twenty less than last season.

At this away day fixture (at Eastlands) last year we had 70 points from thirty seven games. We've got 56 from thirty six currently. It's a massive dip in form, by all concerned (City currently sit on 65). The simple fact of the matter is that even though our opponents are as sexy as Dot Cotton in hot pants and a wet t-shit, they have proved to be more efficient than us when its comes to winning games. On the night it tactically paid off for Mancini. Defend and sit back, Spurs will huff and puff but they wont be blowing no house down. They scored because we let them. They scored because we scored for them.

Our flaws are fundamental ones discussed to death on this blog, on other blogs, on message boards and in the stands. Flaws we'll debate once the season is done and dusted and we look to devise the perfect Tottenham blueprint amongst ourselves in an attempt to calm our emotions and move swiftly through the stages of grief. So I won't be slicing up the deceased body and completing an autopsy on account of the fact that I already know the case of death.

Erotic asphyxiation. Fatal attempt at turning oneself on. Toe tag attached.

Positives from last tonight? Gallas, Rose, Sandro, Modric. We need a forward(s) to push us forward once more. We need to bring back the Kyles from loan and sign a couple more players (to replace the ones that will be sold) for that extra padded squad depth. City might look to spend another bundle to consolidate but their brand of uninspiring offensive movement and their calculated deep defensive play leaves me with an epiphany that the time-share will fall back into our laps next season. For all the cash spent, they're hardly better than us. They are, but they're not. You know exactly what I mean, it's not a conundrum. They didn't buy fourth spot (technically they did, compare the wage bills). We took it back to the shop, gift wrapped it then hand delivered the sonofab*tch.

One win in our last ten league games. Nine home draws overall. Not good.

They retained some measure of consistency whereas we failed to match the tenacity of the back end of last season when we truly took the scruff and went for the jugular. City, for all the negatives we wish to throw at them, got the job done. We didn't.

So congratulations to the blue side of Manchester and the fans who bothered to turn up but only the ones that have supported them for a period of time that would allow me to refer to them as long suffering. Enjoy the Champions League experience. Perhaps you'll sell out a game or two. Perhaps you might even endeavour to attack your opponents. Make sure you're facing the right way otherwise you might miss it.

As for us?

For all our faults, for all our mistakes at least we can pin point the error of our ways. It's a missed opportunity to build on last season by avoiding further transition (and applying even more pressure on City and Liverpool), but no point in dwelling on it beyond accepting responsibility for those fatal flaws. If chairman and manager can do that and not dither in the transfer window or get distracted by this persistent obsession with that crock of crap in Stratford or relegated West Ham United players then we might just capture that missing spark just in time for August. Except that this time next year we'll be mill...we'll be top four. Top three.

Don't be sad, don't be suicidal. We've waited twenty years, we can all wait another season for a second stab at the CL.

Believe.

One last dance

It's almost surreal if you care to reminisce about the back end of last season and the outrageous heart in mouth stamp of determination and desire we brought down onto the throats of our opponents, choking them dead, when chasing a dream which most had already decided was out of our reach.

It's Eastlands again but this time it's not neck and neck it's not do or die. City have breathing space. We simply have pride. That's if we've remembered to pack it up with the kits and boots. The home support will no doubt lap up the avenging nature this game is offering them on a plate. Brace yourself for a history enriched Poznan.

If they win, they have their pot of gold whilst we look up to the heavens with the rain pouring down on us with no sunshiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine to be seen. Another day perhaps in the future it will burst through the clouds once more and we'll rediscover our rainbow.

I would still welcome an upset in our favour (obviously), even if we are simply prolonging the inevitable.

So, with casual badge thumping, come on you Spurs. Do that thing that you do sometimes. The daring and the doing in association with each other that can result with ample swashbuckle tinged with tenacity. Only if you can muster it up of course. Would be nice. One last dance before that sun sits behind the cloud ridden sky and we're left with the light from the night sky moon to guide us home.

Preferable a white moon. Not blue.

The anomaly festers

From March 2011 (Interim results and Chairman's statement):

The statistics will show how fiercely competitive the Premier League now is. We shall look back and be disappointed with our form against clubs in the bottom quarter of the table if we fail to qualify for the UEFA Champions League at the end of this season. It has been in these fixtures where we have taken fewer points than any other team in the Premier League and this is the anomaly in what has otherwise been one of our greatest ever seasons.

How best to fix the anomaly?

Is the problem truly one that can be resolved by replacing our forwards with some of genuine world class ability? Or is there a general stagnation of coaching and ideas from Harry and his back room staff? Have we over-complicated formation and strategy? Not highlighted complacency quick enough? Are we perhaps going through the motions on the training pitch? Or are we allowing emotion to cloud our judgement? Victims of a lull of form or the result of degradation that has been festering for a while?

Redknapp got us into the Champions League. Whether this was an expectancy based on the players we possessed is something that's been discussed many times before (the thinking being it was hardly a miracle achieved). It's a fine line between success and what many would deem failure and this season, there is (even though 6 points separate us) not a lot between us and City. Even with the anomalies we could have made it back into the CL, still leaving us with questions unanswered whether Harry can once more reclaim an uncomplicated system, style and swagger next year without the odd anomaly holding us back.

With CL nigh impossible, it's now all assumptions around the fact that what we are seeing at the moment are issues that can not be resolved. Harry apparently distracted by the media game he plays, even though there hasn't been a season in his career where he hasn't taken part in it.

Next season is monumental. We took a risk on him in the first place and it worked. It's worth another gamble? Or not? As I mentioned in my last blog, it's a collective failure this season. But then such a failure always rests on the shoulders of the gaffer. Then again, it depends what you class as a failure. You might be content, much like Levy might be when remembering how he cited that CL would not be possible season in season out. Which would point towards another season of Harry at the very least.

Discuss amongst yourselves.

Inside the head of Heurelho da Silva Gomes

'Penalty given, no problem I will save it. Come to me ball, I beckon you. Come to me. There we go. Saved. See you later. Job done. Justice. I am a good keeper, I believe in myself. I'm good, I know I am. I saved a penalty. I have no insecurities. I proved it there. In comes the ball again, should I stand my ground or should I attempt to...I wonder if cats dream? And if they did would they dream about eating and sleeping and licking themselves because they hardly do much else in waking life. Oh hold on. What the *** has happened here? It's another penalty. Or is this the penalty from before replayed and if it is why am I in the replay reliving the moment? It makes no sense to me. Has there been a disturbance in the space time continuum? Saved it the first time, I can save it again. I'll dive this way. Okay, then. That was the wrong way. Oh well. There's always next time'.

But I'm only joking. Let's not scapegoat. It's a huddle of hurt where blame needs to be shared by the team and management as one. Although there are pockets of pleasantries (i.e. Modric) that have endeavoured through the lapses of mediocrity. I'm not being overly dramatic here. Don't misunderstand. I'm proud of the way this team has performed over the past couple of season but disheartened that perhaps the reality is we still lack that extra spark and reinforced steel combination. It's not a bad place to be. It's just that the way football evolves from one season to the next, it's easy for a club to lose direction because of what happens at other clubs.

We should have had it wrapped up with ease. The fact we've given it away can't be ignored unless you wish to retain the whimsical comparisons to times when we sat in midtable. Can't be living in the past though, which is how most would counter that.

So, where are we exactly?

We've basically lost a top four place because of the lack of genuine fluidity across our domestic season dropping points like Martin Sheen drops teeth. Beating Blackpool would have got us back into it if anything just to make the last three games exciting, if still quite improbable (based on form). It's no surprise we ballsed it up and ended the dream once and for all. We've been rubbish for weeks.

The result is made worse because of the spirit we displayed this time last season. Euphoria replaced by limp shrugs of despondency. The complete lack of urgency and tempo until AFTER we went 1-0 down and began to play in injury time compounding the lacklustre effort of the full ninety. Not sure why there was such an abyss where desire and belief should have stood proudly.

I guess finishing 4th should not really be deemed a badge of honour anyway. However, finishing in the top four, preferable higher, has to continue to be the clubs ambition. We need to aspire to be the best we can be and if that makes us better than say two of the top four sides, that will be enough to get us into a position to then lay foundations for even bigger challenges. But one step at a time. Levy's prediction about the time share element of the Champions League appears to be coming true. But if he scratched his head hard enough I'm sure he'd agree with the majority that it was there for the THFC brace.

We've underplayed it. What a manager says publicly might not be the same thing he says behind closed doors, but the task of getting back into the CL was hardly a difficult one but yet was treated like one and thus laboured.

So where are we again exactly? On the highway, a few miles from our destination, out of gas. Arguably been running on empty for a while now.

In addition to the definitive disappoint there's also concern for young Bale. You almost understand his reluctance to pick himself up after being fouled in recent games. Goes down to easily, stays down too long. He's only protecting himself, as nobody else appears to be aiding him. Shame on 'he's not that type of player' Charlie Adam who (if you look at the pictures of the tackle or this gif) appears to have snapped Bales ankle in half, but hopefully it looks far worse than it does in image. Nice officiating there too. I guess Adam should have pulled out a semi-automatic rather than waste energy lunging in. Would probably have only got a yellow for firing it at Gareth's legs.

Broken ankle or severe ligament damage at time of writing. Breath of fresh air that, hey Harry? I guess having a go at the opposition isn't deemed too media friendly, might hurt the portfolio. We've always been way too soft in the aftermath of such matters. I'm not saying embrace the some embarrassing traits of a Jose or Fergie, but let's attempt to defend our honour once in a while. Emphasis on protection of all things Tottenham.

Also, nice to see Rose back in the fold. Didn't do too badly. If the season wasn't drawing to a close, we'd probably send him out on loan again. Elsewhere, far too much anonymity. Some controversy over Lennon and the reason(s) why he sat on the bench (poor form or internal disputes?).

In conclusion? Lucky to get the point some might say. I say the draw, on performances, might have been the justified result. The ref was blind and our keeper a loon and our strikers fairly non-existent and our midfield unbalanced but there's no chance of ignoring the fact that this game practically summed up the reason why we're not in the Champions League next season.

No cutting edge, no drive, no focus. Attitude adjustment failure in games we should be bossing. Makes it doubly ironic that we've only lost seven league games this season (so far). The truth festers in the fourteen draws.

We have lost a scandalous amount of points because we've failed to show up and then made hard work of it. We've not improved on last season, we've stagnated. I'm going to have to admit to the fact that it wasn't meant to be and that at some point in the future we'll understand the reasons why. Philosophical musings is all I have left to make this journeys end more comfortable.

A world class forward in January might have made the difference. Personally, thought we still had enough to see ourselves through it. I was wrong. Emphatically wrong. Chairman got it wrong. Manager got it wrong. Some of our players got it wrong.

If you want to be critical and subjective, say if you were a neutral and looked upon Spurs and this season, you might question the fact we have a wealth of talent and we've somehow managed to not find a groove. It's that genuine lack of fluidity again that many have suffered from this season. If you want to be critical you might ask why we went through the motions and failed to take it all by the scruff of the neck. Because out of all the under-achievers, we had the depth to perhaps edge out the competition. Easier said then done and although you might read this article back and think me drowning in negativity - once more, this isn't about pin-pointing scapegoats. Just another gentle nod in the direction of the obvious. It was a collective failure. It's not just up front where we need to improve.

We've not been good enough in key areas in key moments. If you want sustained progression that equates to tangible success you need to hate losing and we have not quite tuned into that frequency yet.

It's still a good thing, a positive thing, to be this club in this position with the squad we have. If you look the past, we are abundantly in better health than we've been for twenty or so years. The problems we have in our workings are ones that if fixed, will propel us upwards once more. The crux is in how chairman and manager go about fixing it. Momentum has not been lost, just misplaced. We need to aim higher and be seen to be aiming higher because the clubs around us will be doing just that.

City are unlikely to waste their opportunity in the CL and will therefore use it as platform to consolidate beyond doubt when alternatively we might have further damaged their project by once more beating them into the top four. That would have allowed us to build on this season without taking a step back. Hope is with the advantage falling into our lap with the single focus of the league whilst they go on their European adventure. Everything is in transition, which is why I will continue to support and believe. It's all I can offer, the rest is out of my hands. Teams around us will get better but so will we.

Onwards, then.

We've learnt a harsh lesson this term. Don't take anything for granted. Wouldn't hurt to be a ruthless yet glorious basterds once in a while too.

Harry Redknapp. What does he do exactly?

Morning. I'm sort of back. My absence? Call it a creative lull thanks to ill health and lacklustre concentration. Not had the time to write. Doesn't look like I've missed much. Michael Dawson with another rallying (worrying) battle cry pre-match. Have we actually won a game after he's attempted a Churchillian speech? Talk about the validity of Europa League qualification continues. Bill Nick would have taken it, I'm sure. Then again, Bill Nick would probably have got us into that other competition. Also there's the transfer tittle-tattle which continues to link Modric and Bale to moves away. Lennon to Liverpool another firm favourite.

I don't mean to be disparaging to other football websites, but linking X player to X club(s) hardly warrants coverage after the 200th time. God help us when the season is over. It's going to be a summer of absolute nonsensical BS drowning out our every move. We wont be able to breathe. And that's just the return of Big Brother. Let alone what the wonders of the summer transfer merry-go-round will bring. Fergie tap-dancing outside the Lane. Redknapp signing ten relegated West Ham players. Jenas, five year contract extension.

Shame there's no such thing as a stasis chamber.

The pear-shaped cockerel will crow again

I'm still sick. My immune system, as dependable as a Brazilian goalkeeper suffering from bouts of aphephobia on any given weekend. If it wasn't enough having Death sat in the corner of my bedroom reading Playboy and periodically tapping the face of his wrist-watch, my problems are compounded. The old girl has pneumonia and I'm having to reorganise time I don't have to fit in all the other pockets of bane in my life to avoid a complete meltdown. In addition to all this drama I'm now experiencing disturbing nightmares, terrorised in my subconscious by a returning Adel Taarabt ghosting around White Hart Lane, tricking and flicking himself to a brace of goals and as many assists. I wake up screaming every night.

These are difficult times.

There isn't a match report of the Chelsea debacle because I was lost in the depths of depression at the time with football hardly at the forefront of my mind and a television nowhere in sight. Not to say I want sympathy for my Easter break that had more cracks in it than a Cadburys egg. Retain your apologies and group hugs for our rather limp run-in which has seen us surrender any genuine chance of reclaiming a Champions League spot.

Is it overly dramatic to suggest that we've surrendered it? I don't think so. I do appreciate that there are certain dynamics to arguing and debating why it's all gone pear-shaped based around the lack of forward activity in the Jan transfer window, the inconsistency with formation and tactics and one or two other plausible post-mortems. In a nutshell, you could sum it all up by perhaps siding with the uncomfortable realisation that we - Tottenham Hotspur, players and manager - gave it all up by making  repeated fundamental mistakes.

This flaw in our grand design simply one that pertains to the fact we have defeated ourselves. Over and over again.

The reason the dynamics here are ambiguous is because, say for example; Arsenal could suggest if they had a decent goalkeeper and more cohesiveness at the back and perhaps took their chances they'd still be in the hunt for silverware. They are, according to their manager, so close.

Which is what we are. Had we a keeper who wasn't prone to making big mistakes at key moments. Had we a genuine world class striker. Had we retained more consistency and structure across our formation. Had we not allowed errors in officiating consume us psychologically. This isn't on the basis of our last game. Generalisation of hope lost.

So close, yet so far.

In both cases (us and the enemy), the problems might be apparent and obvious and almost feel like a final piece of the jigsaw only needs to be slotted in to complete it, but that final piece is somewhere under the sofa and nobody is bothering to push it aside and reach into the dustballs to find it.

We are close. But we are still some way off. Because signing a new keeper or a new forward and deciding on a set formation - these are missing pieces (rather than a single piece) to the puzzle and once it's complete there's no point leaving it on the table gathering dust until it's broken up and placed back into its box for someone else to solve.

Supeglue the sonofab*tch and frame it on the wall for everyone to admire. Because even with the right players and tactics, the glue that binds it altogether is still required for its final decisive completion.

Arsenal still have issues with choking and only when the pressure is off do they turn it on (see their 1-0 win over Utd). With us, perhaps it's complacency or attitude adjustment. It's all about the glue. Sellotape just wont do the job.

That extra spark of something has to be drilled into the players, that desire and hunger, that necessity to be better. Better than the rest.

Yes, it's quite disconcerting to see us drop down to 6th. Doesn't feel right does it? But then the past 15 years haven't exactly been kind to us. Not to say that just because we've had erratic progress and transitions upon transitions that it's okay for us to accept this seasons almost certain failure as one of those things and we'll be back and we'll be stronger for it.

Sure, look at the positives but it still has to be deemed an unacceptable resolution to 2011 because how else do you make sure the squad retain unity of belief and ambition and drive them forward?

We should still look to win all our remaining games. It's a lull, it's a poorly timed one (is there any ilk that's planned?) and its even one we might have got through just about okay had we not dropped all those points against 'weaker' opposition earlier in the season. But the reason we dropped those points is because we've not been good enough across several games domestically.

Not that I'll admit to defeat until its mathematically impossible. So looking ahead, what do we do?

The club has to retain its spine. The club, no matter the competition, needs to be in Europe.

We need to be decisive about the future of Woodgate and King. We have to clear out players who do not have a place as part of the squad and bring in the loaned out players that do. Sign a competitive alternative to Gomes to sharpen competition for the number one jersey. We need that forward. Dare I say we need two new forwards, with spare parts gone as part of the clear out.

Tactically, Redknapp - if stays for one more season - has to accommodate a change in his own agenda. Not a clue whether the England job is going to happen for him. No one is going to argue he looks after number one, has his own set of personal priorities and is very much a media PR manipulator and man-manager who perhaps does lack that killer killer instinct but has proved (to a certain extent) that he can also deliver. He might be self-centred, but it has still benefited us.

He has delivered, the hard way, rather than in any overly dominating fashion. Stats don't lie although they do disguise certain failings. Regardless, Harry has done a good job. What he needs to do is an outstanding one.

Very few, hand on heart, would disagree that we should have done, should be doing, far better than we are. At least that's the general consensus. But then this season has seen similar discussions with the other top tier clubs also wondering why they've not taken it by the scruff of the neck.

It's no easy task fighting for a top four place. There's a buzz about Spurs. Would be a shame to lose it. Long term, Levy should probably start working on that contingency plan. This club has to be in good nick when it's handed over to the next coach.

Perhaps our evolution does require another season of growing before we step up a further level. If there is to be no Champions League qualification this season then let there be a relentless fight for it next season. Because anything less will not be good enough.

Flashback: Remember the hope of 2007?

What with it being DML's 5th 4th birthday, I thought I'd select an article from the first couple of weeks of the blog to scratch the proverbial chin knowingly at the passage of time and thus opted for this not quite end of season review of the 2007 season. Remember when Martin Jol took the mic and spoke to the Lane akin to the height of Beatlemania? Hedonistic days in N17. And yet the following season we once again struck the iceberg in yet another Titanic ground-hog transitional season.

Perhaps things never truly change. Lifeboats at the ready.

There's only one Daniel Levy (Sunday, May 13, 2007 at 6:56PM)

Like **** there is.

So ends the 2007 season. Martin Jol 'just' about avoids the sack with us nicking 5th spot. And he proceeds to thank his chairman by taking the mic at the end of the game and saluting the board for their continued unquestionable investment into the club. Technically, I suppose Martin is correct in doing so. £3 for a mobile phone ring-tone of the Park Lane or the Shelf Side singing is certainly a shrewd way of taking money off the fans to 'invest', along with the additional 'investments' they are pulling in via the increased season ticket prices (if you want to have the crowd singing as your ring-tone, record it on your mobile yourself for ***** sake).

Jol also arse-kissed the home fans by telling us we are the best in the country. We ****ing know that already Martin. Jesus. We are so loud that when we're away the home team play white noise out of their tannoy system to drown out the Glory Glory Hallelujah's.

I'll get back to Jol's thank you speech later. Lets take this from the top.

Home game, last of the season, against Manchester City. Going into this we could have quite easily dropped out of a UEFA Cup spot and into the Inter-Toto, depending also on other results going against us. As usual, Spurs were playing chicken with humiliation. Now you may think me harsh. A win at home today and we would claim 5th spot for the second successive season (as long as Everton failed to win at Chelsea). Would be the first time since 1990 that we would sit in a top 6 placing for a second consecutive year.

All looks good on paper doesn't it? But then has anyone ever heard of a trophy cabinet with a piece of A4 sitting in it?

I decided to attend the final game of the season with my traditional utility belt consisting of:

• Season Ticket 2007
• A box of matches
• Plastic bag to retain the ashes in (for potential ash-throwing later on)
• Leaflets proclaiming Levy as the anti-Christ

I also attended the game in battle clothing. WTF, I hear you ask?

Well firstly, I decided against dressing up as the Anti-Chirpy this season, due to the incident in last years final home game when the real Chirpy squared up to me in Block 34 and we ended up having cock-on-cock action. It's difficult to throw punches dressed as a cartoon cockerel. Even more difficult is to know for sure whether your uppercuts are truly doing any damage due to the cushioned head-mask giving added protection. Suffice to say, I set fire to his face. Ah yes, fond memories of last year. They had to re-design him after that incident. Anyways, that was then. This is the present and today I went dressed as Sir Henry Percy aka Harry Hotspur, 1st Earl of Northumberland. Very apt if you ask me.

Reconstruction: How I looked dressed like Harry Hotspur

From head to toe, I looked the part. Even grew a beard for the occasion. However, due to sporting actual metallic plate armour (none of this fancy dress plastic rubbish - I have a friend who works in theatre) I was advised by the stewards that I would not be permitted to enter the stadium. I quite obviously stood my ground, finding strength from the fact that Henry was a true warrior. In fact, I sometimes wonder if maybe I am the reincarnation of him, which may explain my stupendous resolve and passion in times of hardship.

After a heated debate and the arrival of two police officers outside the South Stand lower entrance, I was politely informed not to continue my protest if I wished to attend the game. Or I'd be spending more than 90 minutes in the back of a police van. Fascism at its very worse. I had to remove the armour. This was not something I had planned for. I had no alternative clothing with me. And there was no chance of parting with my hard earned cash in the extortionate Spurs Shop.

I now knew how Henry felt when he took his visor off during the Battle of Shrewsbury and was hit in the mouth with an arrow, instantly killing him. I had to suffer a similar indignity, as I too was lost for words.

Under the armour, I was actually not wearing much. I was wearing nothing in fact. There's something about the cold metal and the way it felt against my skin that made me decide to go commando. That and the fact that its bloody hot having to wear it and travel on the London Underground without being able to sit down. But the whole experience really helped me to connect with Henry Percy and what it might have been like when he was about to go into battle. I'm sure they didn't have boxer shorts back in those days, so it was quite authentic.

So, having removed the armour, I used my scarf as a make-shift nappy to hide my pride and joy. I'm going to take a guess and say the wolf whistles I got were ironic. And for the record, I do not and have never liked Barrymore and at no point in my life handed out sweets.

Half naked or not, I wasn't about to allow this little setback ruin my day. I took my place in my seat and watched the game with my fellow Spurs fans.

We played woefully bad again much like the Blackburn game on Thursday. Yes, we won. And yes we claimed 5th spot. But this is simply not good enough. I can only say that we must have the same kind of luck West Ham have, but sitting opposite sides of the table. We are just lucky. Evidence supporting this:

•     We can not defend crosses or set pieces
•     We give away painfully simplistic goals, usually created out of individual errors
•     We cannot take set pieces (corners or free kicks)
•     We cannot cross the ball (still no true left winger three years later)
•     We cannot keep clean sheets
•     We still don't have the right balance in midfield
•     We sit back instead of dominating possession

These defects are still present in the team that Martin Jol built and financed by Daniel Levy. Its like having a house with several holes in the roof that water drips down from. Instead of fixing the holes, you leave several buckets to capture the falling water.

Reconstruction: How I looked without the armour

We are 5th - when we should be 3rd. No excuses. Martin Jol's tactics and Levy and Comolli strategics have failed again. 20 more games this season than last, but its not like we played anyone decent in our cup matches (domestically and in Europe) until we played the teams that knocked us out.

Still no wins against the big 4 either in the Prem (or the Cups) and in any of the crunch games apart from the 2-1 win at WHL against Chelsea. But as that was the only victory, I'll put that down as a fluke.

If you take 3 games from the season that we could have won if it wasn't for individual or tactical mishaps, we could easily be neck and neck with 4th and 3rd.

I'm getting side-tracked.

Back to today. The game matched the weather (it was depressing). I tried several times to start up anti-Levy chants, only to be drowned out by 'England's Number One'. Yes, the immovable object still gets a chorus or ten every game, which I'm sure he celebrates by having a half-time pie.

As my nipples hardened in the cold weather and with the final whistle being blown, I then had to endure more cringe-worthy embarrassment. And for anyone in Block 34, I am not referring to the incident when my scarf came loose due to experiencing an 'unnecessary' and poked the young lady who sits in front of me in the back of her head (thankfully, she thought it was my match-day programme).

I am of course referring to the end of the game 'celebrations' which included various 'Player of the Year' awards and Martin Jol being handed a microphone. Now, initially, I half expected him to do an impersonation of Dean Martin if Dean Martin was alive, sober, Dutch and had no jokes. But it turned out to be a mish-mash of Winston Churchill rallying the troops and a Gordon Brown speech.

Jol is no MC

Several bursts of sound bites followed by rapturous supporter applause and chanting. It turned into a farce the moment he gave credit to the board of directors. I found myself utterly ashamed as a chorus of 'There's only one Daniel Levy' erupted from a section of the Park Lane. These fools must have been p*ssed on cheap cider - but the more likely explanation is that they are members of the Agents of Levy, a clandestine group of paid actors Levy has infiltrating the stands to make sure the right type of 'noises' are heard during the game.

Its like the CIA in South America all over again.

All the fanfare hides another disappointing season without silverware. Eight points adrift off 3rd place and still persisting in starting Anthony 'One more year till his testimonial' Gardner.

Gardner is a paradox. A man that should never have been a professional footballer, yet finds himself playing in the Premiership and earning thousands. Constantly proves he should drop down a division with his Harold Lloyd performances, yet consistently wears our colours as a utility player. Maybe Jol is waiting for Sam Beckett to quantum leap into Anthony and turn him into a hero. Newsflash Jol; Sam Beckett is played by an actor (Scott Bakula) and Quantum Leap is a fictional sci-fi television series. Its never going to happen. Anthony Gardner will never have Al and Ziggy to help him out with his back passes and composure.

After Jol's stand-up routine (he could have shat in a hat and still got worshipped by the home faithful) I proceeded with my traditional burning of my season ticket. Sadly, due to the enforced policing and general fascist state ethos the club aspires too I had to burn the season ticket in the men's toilets. This did not have the desired effect I wished for, as people kept asking me if I could share my spliff with them.

It would appear that Levy had the last laugh today. The sun, breaking out from behind the grey miserable clouds blinded everyone from the factual truth that we are once more 'nearly' there. I find myself dead, exhumed and cut up into four quarters - each part buried in each corner of the White Hart Lane pitch. All that's missing is my head stuck on a pole at the gates of the West Stand.

It's going to be long long summer. But don't think that the battle is over. I will haunt Levy like the ghost of Henry Percy. I mean literally. I plan to break into his house tonight and walk around with a white bed sheet over my head.

It was four years ago today...

...I posted this article quoted below.

Day Zero

Wednesday, May 2, 2007 at 11:32PM

I have returned from exile. And in addition, have decided to embrace the Internet and blog culture in my fight against the oppressor. Season ticket burning season is almost upon us with the 2007 footballing year drawing to a close, falling into the abyss that is the summer transfer window. My therapist says keeping a journal should help. Personally I believe excessive porn and midnight conversations with Jack Daniels will block out any reoccurring night terrors.

Happy 4th b-day DML. I'm still here. From mid-table to bottom of the table to Champions League. I've had the odd sabbatical, almost quit once or twice, but stuck with it. From Jol to Ramos to Redknapp.

I've also managed to write a few letters. Burnt the odd season ticket in protest. Been threatened. Been accused. Asked what exactly does Jenas do. Said countless hellos and goodbyes to the Arsenal trolls that always appear to gloat when it's safe to do so but never turn up when it's not.

Hated on International Break. Wrote the odd article about Stratford. Hated on Matthew Norman.

Had Andrei Arshavin and Dimitar Berbatov guest-blog. Attempted and succeeded in relegating Newcastle United. Punched Chirpy in the face. Used the same Quantum Leap joke twice. Made friends, lost friends.

Introduced the Four Horsemen and had them appear in the Stupendous Adventures of Bale and Bentley. Held hands in the Love Parade with the ITK community on more than one occasion because they just love the attention.

Even allowed Kanye West to interrupt...several times.

Expanded to Twitter, Facebook and made some videos on You Tube and even stalked Daniel Levy to the tune of Eminem.

So thanks for the support. And special hugs for...

Chris Toy, All Action no Plot, Who Framed Ruel Fox?, Musings, Tottenham on my Mind, Windys Blog, What a Fantastic Run, THFC1882, anything the one trick pony teh trunk does, all the newly born start-up Spurs blogs, all the Spurs fans on Twitter, Scott the Red from Mancunia, the glory glory boys, the narcs over at rumourwhores...yadda yadda yadda.

Hopefully the experience here hasn't been too shabby. You can't expect to be able to please everyone and I've hardly done that in the past four years. Nice to see one or two of you have stuck around. The ones that don't always agree but still visit, cheers for being here to provide the counter-arguments.

I'm only as good as what Tottenham have to offer and the club never fails to inspire, be it in bad or good times.

Although I'm not about to part money with Interflora, I should also say a thank you to the chairman. Imperative to this blog has Daniel been. If Levy did happen to leave THFC in the future, I'd perhaps be forced into registering a new domain name. Dear Mr Pleat?

So before the sentimentality floods the place with tears, just wanted to give you a wink and a pat on the back. If this was a pub, I'd buy you a pint. Onwards to the 5th then the 10th anniversary we march.

Ta.