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Entries from August 1, 2012 - August 31, 2012

Wednesday
Aug152012

Mess


I don't do this often. This is a one-take blog, written in one session from start to finish without going back to edit. Therefore no re-writes and countless re-drafting and tidying up to allow for a solid easy to read structure. It's a mess, so please excuse the grammatical minefields and lack of flow. I wrote it in 10 minutes during a tea-break on Wednesday afternoon. I guess I've got another epiphany due and I've just gone into labour.

 

After signing two players early on in the summer transfer window, we await for more activity to consolidate the squad. Strikers, a right-winger and a midfielder are the much maligned topics of conversation and hope. Then there's benched players that probably don't future at the club that need to be moved on. One certainty is we have only Defoe and Kane available to start away to Newcastle United. At the time of writing it's Wednesday. It's highly improbable we'll see new arrivals before the weekend. Even if we did it wouldn't impact the squad selected to travel up north.

The fifth final bid has been made by Madrid. Might still take one more final bid to finally finalise the deal. We've spent £18M on the two players that did arrive early, so what's the hold up with our other projected targets? I can't believe we're reliant to shifting Luka out of the club to complete deals with other players. Why? Well firstly because Daniel Levy's stance is 'we're not a selling club' and that we don't look to pluck out our best players and stick 'em in the shop window. If Luka wanted to stay and Madrid still perused him, Levy wouldn't sell him. He made that clear last season. He made it clear this summer with Gareth Bale signing a new deal. Yes, we are building a new stadium and long term the club have to be vigilante and assured of how we handle our finances now and in the next five years and beyond that time period. But surely we have money to spend. Unless we don't and we're all completely missing the point of what's going on behind closed doors. Because let's face it, everything we discuss is based on breadcrumbs from the media and other sources. Perhaps it's all posturing and mind games and we read either too much or too little into it. It's funny how we dismiss some-things out of hand and yet take the next thing literally, probably because that person is reinforcing (subconsciously) an agenda.

We have to remain fiscally fit, attractive to prospective players and to the fans in the stands. We can't risk a meltdown. Is it no wonder Levy drives forward with robust shrewdness, making sure he gets the best possible deal every single time? But does his stubbornness impact detrimentally to the progress of developing the squad? I guess the arguments relate to the fact we've not signed a forward - loan deals withstanding - for several years. Which is staggering or perhaps not. Redknapp and Levy hardly saw eye to eye on transfer strategy. Adebayor is the likely signing, the second 'forward' we also wish to see concluded tends to be dressed up with media rhetoric and football fan obsessions. Leandro, Llorente, Hulk…we don't really know, we just select probable players that fit our bill of expectations and expect the club to bid for them because the back pages say so.

I'm certain we're bidding/talking to clubs. So if I'm right (I am because how could I possibly not be because being wrong would mean we're not interested in anyone which is just crazy) then much like Madrid can't agree a deal with us for Luka then surely the same issues occur elsewhere - a struggle to shake hands and put pen to paper. Or are we simply unlucky? Are the clubs we're dealing with driving a hard bargain much like our Daniel does? Good enough for us, right? Other clubs have signed their players without drama. But then, we did sign two players with no such issues (aside from the traditional 3 month medical that attaches itself to every transfer).

So either we're not offering enough (from the opposing clubs viewpoint) or we're constrained by our wage cap. Which is there for a reason. We break it for certain players but it will be budgeted or worked out through signing on fees/bonuses etc. If we start throwing money at everything that moves, the books won't balance. Do we then perhaps have to scout better, for cheaper alternatives? Are we aiming too high? But then why should we not? The players we've been linked with this summer CAN play for the club. We're hardly reaching for the stars from the depths of the ocean.

Fact remains though, the way we attempt to do our business, it means we're mostly staring into the first weekend with key areas not fleshed out with new blood.

Are we suffering for being far too business inclined with our approach work in transfers? Arguably, looking back, it's not like we've been shy in the transfer market. Under Redknapp's tenure it was wheeling dealing rather than rock'n'roll, although some of his signings worked superbly well - but were short term not long term. Is it dreamy to expect decisive conclusions to strengthen the squad, or does reality laugh back in our face calling us petulance?

We didn't get players in early last season but that didn't cost us CL football. Sure it cost us points as we searched for a forward and midfielder and attempted to deal with wantaway Luka. But the real cost came later in the season with Harry losing focus and not having the mental metal nerve to retain and order of balance to proceedings. This time round we bemoan we've not done ALL of our business early and there's no doubt if things remain as they are it will impact our preparations for the long haul. So is there blame and if so who takes their place on the naughty step? Is it truly this difficult to sign players? It certainly appears to be if the three people involved ( us, targeted player + agent, opposing selling club) don't agree in unison.

The long game is this. ENIC are an investment company. They have shareholders. The new stadium will make the club a very healthy option for someone to bid for at some point in the future, when a new chapter of ownership will begin. In the mean time, the club delete loyalty points to award supporters that have money in their pocket presently, discarding those that might have shown loyalty for 10-20 years but not in recent seasons. It's a business. It's fickle. Loyalty differs from one person to the next.

However, fans are equally fickle. Go back to our not so distant past and tickets for games were easy to come by. We had no season ticket waiting list that sat in the tens of thousands. Fans only want to see the big games and ignore some of the lesser ones (as witnessed on a number of occasions last season). This nods towards a knowing concern that a 55K + stadium might have a few empty seats, but if they're taken up by tourists the club wont waste a shrug on it. Down the road, our enemy have had to make sacrifices, on the board and off it. They've accepted a position of competing and attaining CL football and have redefined this as something that constitutes success. Although many of their fans haven't accepted the shift in ideology, even with them losing their captain every summer, they survive within the top tier by working within their means. Once they are debt free, they might afford to be more adventurous and speculative - although they've not done too badly this summer in the transfer market.

We are also working within our means. But we're not quite on that top tier, we're fighting to be part of it season in and season out. All the politics of modern football, the way we are perceived as consumers and not supporters, it's always been there, eating away at me, taking bites out of me and spitting them in my face. I have to go back to the 80s and early 90s to remember how different things were. Even if the football was frustrating at times, there was a wonderment with the experience. We got on with it no matter what. I remember the '91 season and the troubles the club had. Had we not won the FA Cup, who knows what would have happened. But get this, we'll have a bigger stadium hopefully fashioned on the old skool whilst maintaining modern design. New bricks but a closer to the pitch atmosphere, unlike many of the new skool arenas being built. And we've also got a brand new training complex. The future awaits. Only question is how we plan to get there. In a steamroller or a unicycle.

I don't know where I'm going with this, I'm trying to scratch away at the surface of something. It's an itch, it might go away or it might not and I'll end up breaking skin. In recent years football has felt as good as it did when things were far more purer and not corrupted by Sky Sports hype and money. Progression is something we love and hate, we pick and choose. There's a lot wrong with the game but there's plenty good about it too. I guess I'm trying to figure out if it's possible to support a club and be detached by the weight of expectation or whether that very weight is what gives football it's passion. You wouldn't join the army if you didn't much like the idea of combat. Without the war they'd be no need for that army.

I don't think you can support a club without getting your hands and mind dirty. It's intrinsic to it. Those very same politics that pull away at our heart strings to the tune of melancholy beats are necessary. Is it really possible to just go to the game and sing and love your team no matter what and then do the same the following week? Yes, probably. But you'll be sucked right back in again because you'll still have an opinion on something, you'll still want to share your thoughts or displeasures. It's no longer an escapism. There's just too much going on, too much coverage, commentary and commitment to the game for it to be dismissed as 'just a game' to enjoy. That element of aspiration, to be better, it comes with pressure. Without the intensity of pressure there is no true impact of progression once it's achieved.

We want success, we want it the Spurs way. It's an impossible mess of misery and magic. That's what football amounts to most of the time. Mixed emotions, highs and lows.

Christ, this rambling started off about transfer targets. The irony of it all is that all of this will be dismissed if we signed 3/4 players before deadline day. Which sort of nudges towards the fact that when you do strip it all the way (the business, the politics) it IS all about the football. It is all about the 90 minutes of THFC we get every week, home or away.

The feeling of being marginalised will only get stronger over time. It's unavoidable, complain about modern football as much as you like, it's something to face up to. It's not really our club any more. It's an entity, a brand name, a money making machine. We can't control anything associated with it. All we can do is attempt to influence our own experience and perception of how we support the team and how we enjoy match day. The essence of THFC isn't something found on some legal document in Levy's desk drawer. It's in your heart, in your voice, in your song, in your belief. It's you.

Which makes everything else is filler.

Tuesday
Aug142012

tehTrunk Tottenham's Top ITK - Episode Ten: A New Dawn 

 

It's all change at the Lane, but out with the old and in with the new as Spurs prepare for a new era...

Created by tehTrunk
Sound engineering by Pope Beats
Additional Production credit Charlotte 'Peachy' Hamilton

Twitter @tehTrunk

 

For all other Trunk vids, visit the You Tube channel here.

Sunday
Aug122012

Hotel ITK

Hotel California reimagined for Tottenham Hotspur. With sincere apologies to The Eagles, writers Don Felder, Glenn Frey, Don Henley and producer Bill Szymczyk.

Instrumental here.

 

Hotel ITK

On a dark twitter timeline, I.T.K makes me glare
Warm smell of bullsh*t, makes me pull out my hair
Up ahead on NewsNow, I saw an enticing link
Spat out coffee, eyes popped out of my head
I had to browse and couldn't blink
There it stood between adverts;
I read the cryptics well
And I was screaming to myself,
"This could be factual or this could be fail"
Then I switched on Sky Sports, Jim White showed me the way
There were texts on my iphone,
I thought I saw them say...

Welcome to the Hotel In the Know
I want to punch their face (Want to punch their face)
Want to hurt with mace
Plenty of lies at the Hotel In the Know
Always twice a year (Always twice a year)
You will find them here

His mind is definitely twisted, he's got copy and paste
He got a lot of silly, silly blogs but not an ounce of taste
How they post with their comments, sickly sycophants
Why bother with this, he's not clairvoyant

So I called up the Phantom,
"Please who shall we sign?"
He said, "Blue yellow done and dusted he's one of a kind"
But I tell him to f**k off, I'm way out of line,
So I'm kicked off the forum by the admin
And I'm banned for life...

Welcome to the Hotel In the Know
They never get it right (They never get it right)
Make things up each night
They never commit at the Hotel In the Know
Always twice a year (Always twice a year)
I will always jeer

Luka, there's no feeling,
Hope you get head lice
Daniel Levy said "You signed a contract fool, keep you here for life"
And all our transfer targets,
Their clubs refuse to talk
Villas-Boas wants to sign Moutinho
But there's no pen we just stalk

Last prayer I remember, I cried
'Transfer deadline is here'
I had to pray for goals galore
Where is that forward Adebayor?
"Signed" said the chairman,
"Yes we've concluded a deal.
It's Jermaine Jenas on a long term contract,
you're not dreaming, it's for real"

 

Friday
Aug102012

Things I want to see from Spurs this season (#1)

#1

Take the Europa League seriously

 

It's not the Champions League. The group stages are not sexy. It's an afterthought to keep the plucky sides that missed out on the elite competition happy, even though for the most part they're not because they're distracted with trying to qualify for that very same elite competition. It's not been taken seriously for a while, but with Villas-Boas you sense he will want committment. It's important if you believe it's important. It's either this or the Capital One Cup. Take it seriously and it shapes into something tangible. But beyond the standard discussions on squad rotation and head coach ambitions to drive home a winning mentality no matter the game being played, the final is in Amsterdam, in The Amsterdam ArenA.

Amsterdam. The final is in Amsterdam. It's in the 'dam.

AMSTERDAM*.

*Tag with 'potential to be greatest ever away day'.

Do we really need another reason to want to go all the way to the final? It's in Amsterdam. The prospect of silverware is a nice to have, but the prospect of...Hash cakes, mushrooms, red light district, beer, fit birds on bicycles, threesomes (affordable), pornography, red light district, coffee shops, lap dancers, red light district...

Never red? On this occasion, it's an acceptable alternative to blue. Trust me.

I want to go all the way. I demand a happy ending.

 

COYS

 

Friday
Aug102012

A or B

A or B. Choose.

 

A) Stay firm on Luka Modric valuation, not a penny less. Dig heels in and only accept an offer if it matches the valuation. So if it's £35M it's got to be that or else, no deal. Do as we did to Chelsea last season, with assured stubbornness, protecting the principle above all things. Club before players, even if it means sacrificing equilibrium.

B) Take a hit, accept a lower bid, not derisory (say £28M- £30M) and rid the club of a player that doesn't want to wear the shirt and allow the club/squad/fans to move onto better things, which would include a 'replacement' playmaker.

 

 

-

DML Supa Liga

Fantasy Football and me, do not go hand in hand. Full of confidence on day one, by Christmas I'm out of the race like a much maligned Spurs side of the 1990s. I blame other distractions such as Football Manager but the reality is, I lose focus faster than Harry Redknapp in the midst of flirting with England. However, you lot appear to want this back again, so knock yourselves out:

Code to join the DML Supa Liga is: 195141-56816  (Fantasy Premier League 2012/13)

May the most obsessed geek win.

Thursday
Aug092012

Luka transfer saga countdown to deadline day

 

10th August - Real Madrid make another 'final offer'

11th - Tottenham reject it

12th - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

13th - Tottenham reject it

14th - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

15th - Tottenham reject it

16th - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

17th - Tottenham reject it

18th - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

19th - Tottenham accept bid...then send follow up fax stating "LOL, BARE JOKES, NO DEAL, SOZ"

20th - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

21st - Tottenham reject it

22nd - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

23rd - Tottenham reject it

24th - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

25th - Tottenham reject it

26th - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

27th  - Tottenham reject it

28th - Real Madrid make 'final offer'

29th - Tottenham spend the day mulling over new offer, which is less than original 'valuation of player'

30th - Tottenham grudgingly accept bid, Modric sold, Levy fails in last gasp deal for João Moutinho. Re-signs Saha.

31st - Nothing happens

1st September - Spurs start Jenas in central midfield as playmaker against Norwich, with Kane upfront for the injured Defoe. Club 'Hopeful' in completing deal for Adebayor in Jan transfer window

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tuesday
Aug072012

Calm before the storm

I'm travelling, or will be shortly, so depending on whether I get drunk at the hotel bar and then decide to rant via iphone about our lack of apparent decisiveness with < insert complaint here > or perhaps not I probably won't blog anything of any real consequence until I'm back. There's hardly much newsworthy content doing the rounds at the minute. I guess I could make some up?

Not long to go before the start of the season, slightly longer till the closure of the transfer window. Seems it's shaping up to be a three-tier summer of activity. We got the new coach in early followed by two signings. That was tier one, giving us assurance and confidence. Villas-Boas has supposedly let players know if they have a place in his plans, the ones that don't will be sold (that's if anyone can match Levy's valuation of them). That was tier two, an assessment and clean-up. We all know long term dynamic changes in formation and methodology will come in the course of the season playing out. Villas-Boas has already, on a number of occasions, cited the fact that not too much will change initially. The most important aspect of all of this involves the work done on the training pitch and we won't know the level of impact until we visit Newcastle.

Tier three is where we find ourselves right this second. Ideally, the club will bring in two more players before the start of the season. Adebayor being the most likely one, the other also a forward. Basically nothing has changed from last week and the week before that. Everyone is waiting for something to happen. I've sat back and enjoyed the Olympics, not something I expected to do as I was quite cynical with it all beforehand. Not even sure why I was like that, perhaps the whole Stratford bid clouded my patriotism in the build up to it. I've always been a big fan of track and field, so happy this summer has included a fair amount of distraction. No such entertainment elsewhere. Tabloids, Twitter and ITK twits continue to regurgitate the same rumours with their suggestive cryptic clues. It's not that I'm bored, just anxious to see the season kick start.

As for Luka Modric, the longer the saga drags on the more concerned I become. I've blogged about this before, that there has to be a cut off date with this. If we can only buy certain transfer targets off the back of selling Modric to Madrid then there has to be a point in the summer, in the next couple of weeks where Levy's stance is final; "Bid 'today' or else the player stays". We can't sell him days before the deadline then expect to sign a replacement - unless there's a very definite domino effect waiting to play out. The easiest way to handle all this, as a fan, is to admit we (as fans) know nothing about what is transpiring behind closed doors. All we can do is have faith that the type of players we think we need are the very same type the chairman and coach are targeting. I think we can agree that is definitely the case. Otherwise we're doomed to the indignity of 5th spot :trollface:

In the meantime, I'll be on Twitter thanks to free hotel wi-fi, laughing at allegedly hacked footballer accounts and people generally wetting their panties in anticipation for something, anything.

The Fighting Cock podcast is also back this week, so look out for episode one of season two on Thursday/Friday. I won't be on it, but there's a guaranteed wealth of drunken philosophy that will cater for your listening needs. I have to wait until next week before I rejoin the glory hole of Spurs. Not forgetting the return of the 'Ultras' (to be renamed), following the Spurs youth team on their travels. We took 200 to Charlton last season for a FA Youth Cup game. More of the same this season including the NextGen series, including Barcelona at the Lane (although I'll hazard a guess the Spurs training ground fixtures are behind closed doors) - we'll keep you posted on the details.

Calm before the storm then. I guess we best enjoy it. It's going to go mental once the Kraken  is released.

 

(Kraken is a metaphor and not a £20M striker)

 

 

-

 

DML Supa Liga

Fantasy Football and me, do not go hand in hand. Full of confidence on day one, by Christmas I'm out of the race like a much maligned Spurs side of the 1990s. I blame other distractions such as Football Manager but the reality is, I lose focus faster than Harry Redknapp in the midst of flirting with England. However, you lot appear to want this back again, so knock yourselves out:

Code to join the DML Supa Liga is: 195141-56816  (via Fantasy Premier League 2012/13)

May the most obsessed geek win.

Friday
Aug032012

Intensity

What makes Tottenham the club we are is personified by our style of play. There were moments even when we were abject (Gross), ordinary (Graham) or just plain ridiculous (Ardiles) where you could still see our traditions shine through the dark brooding thundery clouds. We like to play football. ‘Attractive and entertaining’ is how it’s usually labelled. Arthur Rowe, innovator, redefining the game and giving football push and run. Bill Nicholson with a side that won the title in black and white with elegance and flair and power and yet will probably still be revered long after other Technicolor and HD teams are long forgotten. We've witnessed a dip or two but we’ve still managed to add our ribbons to silverware in each decade since the 1950s. Jack Jones and wife of Morton Cadman would be proud. But more importantly, we’ve held onto our ethos, even if at times we’ve done so with the tips of our fingers, in the absence of a hearty grip. We are Tottenham because we like to do things in style and with a flourish.

What we’ve lacked on so many occasions in the past is a spine. A backbone. A growl of tenacity. It’s been a culture of comfort, with pillow fights and daydreams rather than looking into the eyes of a Balrog in the Mines of Moria muttering 'come at me bro'. We’ve had our echoes of glory but the harsh reality is that for a long time competing to become one of the elite was beyond our reach. The intent to play was there but the execution has mostly resembled a guillotine with feathers instead of a razor sharp blade. Flattered to deceive, delusions of grandeur, misplaced expectations and confused entitlement has left us with the unwanted pretenders tag. A tag that’s sometimes been undeserving because pretenders don’t sit in mid-table mediocrity. But times have changed.

In terms of upholding traditions and aspiring to play the game in the way the likes of Rowe and Nicholson would love to see it played, we've always aspired to such glory but to be truly glorious you have to be more than just a pretty footballing team. You need fortitude and belief. Even hard boiled grit and intent, the type that is befitting a true contender, is still not enough if you can’t see out the execution and chop the heads off the opposition without an ounce of remorse.

We've had plenty of mediocre days where our hearts were bigger than our brains and we dreamt of impossible dreams but came nowhere near fulfilling them. We’re not that football club any more. Sorry, we are. We still dream, but they're far more lucid. Our awakening is upon us. Times have changed. We’re most definitely not comparable to any of the sides that languished during long spells in the 90s and early 00s. Those particular sides from the past, they have no actual relevance to us carving out a sparkling new future. They were teams that were mismatched, broken. We've outgrown that particular anchor. Their problems, their issues, they belong in the past. They're not comparable to any of the new challenges ahead of us so we shouldn't concern ourselves with inheriting them.

However, the immediate past, of this current side, is important. We're working our way through a learning curve, evolving the current squad. The days of Rowe, Nicholson, Burkinshaw, Pleat (87) along with Jol's side are simply examples of us upholding our traditions with substance. Something Redknapp picked up and Villas-Boas will seek to continue.

We know we have intent and the ability but we under-performed last season when considering the projected potential of the current side. We failed because we’ve not quite mastered that last level of the playing field. The one that when reached sees you move onto the next tier where experience of success allows you to grow stronger. You win a title, you understand what it means to win a title so next time you’re prepared for it because you’ve already fought through the fight. If you missed out that first time you’ll still be prepared for the next battle because the mistakes made will make you stronger. In our case, titles are not in our sight just yet. But if we wish to push on we can look to the immediate past to improve the immediate future. Titles are not in our sight and yet for one brief moment last season, if it wasn't for an inch or two...

We still need to jump from that last level onto that next tier. We didn’t attempt the jump last time of asking, we bottled out of it, lucked out too, in the run up.

Belief and desire, it’s an absolute given at this level. For us, it's no longer about attaining that because without it we won’t be where we are today. In a solid position. One that Villas-Boas understands and one that is appreciated with the work achieved by our previous coach. Our football will hopefully become a more robust beast under VB. Shrewd, measured and disciplined. Players will need to raise their game so that the team can rise to the occasion and execute the opposition. Leaving us with a clear run up to make that jump.

Intensity. Relentless intensity.

We have to be bullish and kill teams off. We also have to be assassins, last men standing, when least expected. This is something we've seen in recent times, mugging teams. Not playing very well but coming away with all three points. But what is missing is that drive and committed focus to keep that instinct going from the first game to the last. It's not an easy task and last season was a harsh lesson, a reminder that we have to improve. A winning mentality is one thing, but one that is aggressive and progressive and punishing is the difference between fourth spot and first place. That's where the coach truly earns his keep, with guidance and balance.

All the basic foundation work is done. Our away record is decent, one key thing you can compare to those darker days because we are performing with consistency and confidence on our travels. Our home form also retains strength. But it comes back to that extra edge, that extra something, to really push us onwards...we still need more.

Tottenham have rarely been cut-throat killers. We’ve turned it on and brushed teams aside but we can still choke up with indecisiveness. That cutting edge, tactically (to change a game) via the bench and projected onto the players on the pitch is an area that we have displayed evolution that compliments the squad at our disposal. But it's not perfect. And at times it's suffered, it's been stale and unimaginative. That extra edge can only be birthed from the failed attempts that come before it. Our mistakes, our shortcomings from last season are sacrifices that have to make us stronger. Otherwise our evolution stagnates.

Villas-Boas will only be as good as the players are in translating his instructions. With better players alongside our best players improving further, we'll find that extra edge. We were very good under Harry Redknapp but when we were found wanting it was because we had no answers to some of the questions being posed. We lacked depth, physically and mentally.

If we’re going to improve and impose ourselves on the league, more so than last term and in a more sustained style we’ll have to want it more than the next team, at all times, training pitch and on field. We're going to have to get it right off the pitch, with transfers, before we can really shape up for the battle on it. That much maligned conundrum, the search for a striker or two, will be most telling once the season starts. It's a defining moment that will play out between now and the end of the transfer window.

A lack of focus and astuteness cost us dearly but equally so did the simple fact that as good as our team was on its day and as good as we looked on paper, from one man to the next in our starting eleven we didn’t pack enough punch and fizzled out when it mattered most.

This is as good as we’ve had it for a long time, no argument there, but that is no accolade. It's no historic page in the next edition of The Opus. It’s no badge of honour. It's not a piece of silverware. It's just a factual statement based on league performance and statistics. It’s just an obstacle we’ve found our way through. It's not tangible history defining success. It's simply a pin in a wall chart chronicling our progress. Stop for the acclaim and you’ll stop yourself moving onto the next challenge.

So onto the next one we march. And we don't look back.

 

Thursday
Aug022012

Much Ade about nothing

Bale and Adam

Gareth getting a ton of flak from his own fans over the Adam vendetta, a tart some say for constantly banging on about it. Next time, if his ankle is broken, I'll quote Bale's complaints to remind you of the tarts feelings on this matter.

Victoria Line extension

Haringey Council have unveiled their vision for 'Tottenham' which includes information relating to Northumberland Park train station finally getting an extension via the Victoria Line to aid that extra incoming traffic and escape home. The document is 56 pages long. Also worth noting is that the summer of 2016 is when the NDP is aiming for completion. We'll have to wait a little longer for the tube extension with work beginning 2017.

The high line

Not perfect yet is it? But then we've not played that many games and we still lack a key component for it to work - a 'sweeper' keeper. Lloris rumours continue. The system won't work too well with Brad between the sticks because of his lack of adventure walking forwards. Equally important is having the likes of Parker and Sandro available to pressure players in the middle of the park. Early days. Parker set to miss start of season due to op. The high line itself also relies on communication and fluidity of not just the defenders but how they push forward with support from said midfield. A variety of components are required for it to work but it won't do so with assured confidence until we have all the necessary players in place. Also, patience. It won't be perfect from the off which means expect errors early on once the season starts proper until they are ironed out. Of course, if everyone is on key with positioning it will be a lot more comfortable and stress free the stronger it grows from one game to the next.

Adebayor and Luka

Nothing appears to have changed publicly aside from Villas-Boas citing the mental state of Modric who is currently training whilst we wait for the next chess move between Levy and Madrid. Almost feels like nothing else (transfer wise) will happen until this is resolved. How certain are we that someone will meet the clubs valuation of the player? How certain are we that Levy will hold strong on his stance and not shift from it, much like he did last year with Chelsea? It's dragging like a legless zombie crawling through a graveyard. We can't sign a replacement until he's gone so if we're not signing a replacement is it because we're unsure of the players departure? When is the cut off date - as a deal on the final day of the season won't work for us unless we've signed another midfielder before then.

As for our forward line. The Adebayor deal appears to be going the distance much like the Jan Vert signing did. Technicalities concerning wages? It's more than likely to happen much like it was this time last week/month. Whatever the hold up with us/City it's going to be an identical issue if Adebayor was attempting to sign for any other club. So with all the work done thus far on trying to get him on a permanent contract, I don't think the deal will collapse. We also need a goal scoring machine and the real mystery remains who that might be. Wouldn't surprise me if we announced someone out of nowhere. Wouldn't surprise me if we didn't. We've not 'signed' a striker since Robbie Keane returned to the club. We are due something very special. Otherwise, tears will be shed.

 

Wednesday
Aug012012

The Book of Daniel - Chapter Five

by Ryan the perplexed

 

And so after many years of service to his people and visits to the doctor, King Ledley finally rested at Mt Kneebo.  The Tottenhamites paused and reflected on the end of an era. He was humble, gracious, supremely talented, lightning quick.  Everything the Great Sinner Terry was not.  And yet Terry had the luck of Heaven and Prince Ledley had the luck of Hell.  And so Daniel donned his priestly vestments and took Ledley onto Mt Kneebo, which overlooked the promised land of regular CL football and subjugation of the Goonite hordes.

‘Look at this land before you Ledley’ said Daniel. ‘This is the golden future of the Club’ And Ledley became greatly distressed as Daniel seemed to be pointing at Harry Kane. ‘No –not him. He’s useless. See there on that far mountain, a small man with ginger hair and a neatly trimmed beard is talking to the players. His name is Boaz and he had one good year at Porto and has managed the British Virgin islands in the Maccabi Champions League.’ And Ledley looked, shook his head sadly and devoted the rest of his days to the Hotspur Foundation and the Darren Anderton Institute for Sports Science.

And Daniel was proud of making Boaz a Tottenhamite and brought him before the Lord to dazzle Him with his football wisdom. Daniel asked Boaz to explain to the Lord about bringing Bale into the game more. And before Boaz could speak, the Lord placed a small frog inside Boaz’s mouth for His own amusement.

‘Felicitations Holy One’ began Boaz. ‘We plan to introduce Bale more rigourously on the more vacant placements on pitch <cough>.

And the Lord turned to  Daniel and said ‘I have no idea what he is saying’.

But Boaz continued ‘ It is imperative that Bale finds and creates <croak> outlets for attack-minded runs in order to create dissonance within the minds of the opposition.  We intend to <splutter> utilise retro-functioning runs by the more advanced players –to alter the targeting of the defenders.  That is my project. Here is my pencil case.’

And the Lord said ‘What does that mean?’ And Daniel said ‘ I have no idea but it sounds impressive doesn’t Oh Lord? There can be no comparison between the wise verbiage of Boaz with the tics and twitterings of Ari.’

And the Lord mulled over this for a while and opened up Google Translate on his Godphone.  He changed the settings to translate from ‘Technical Waffle’ to just ‘English’ and used this to translate the words of Boaz.  When the Lord ask Boaz what would his advice be to strikers when bringing them on with 10 minutes left, Boaz replied ‘they should find scenarios to their advantage to create maximum likelihood of success-enabled objectives’.  The Lord then translated this to ‘Cockney chancer’ and it was translated as ‘ Go and fakkin run about a bit’.  He then translated it to Wengerish and it read as ‘I did not see the incident but the opposition did not deserve to score 5 goals against us. They bullied us and fouled my superior players – the brutes, the brutes!’

And the Lord strongly suspected that Boaz was actually an android created by Aurasma to fulfil Daniel’s footballing needs.  Suddenly it all made perfect sense.  Boaz’s robotic joints occasionally seized when he was in a crouching position, and that is why Daniel brought in a German mechanic to be at Boaz’s side to oil him and maintain his parts.  A year ago, Abramovich had spent £13m on Boaz, thinking he would be a fantastic protocol droid who could entertain and astonish guests on his lavish yacht.  Only when his restraining bolts were removed, did Boaz make his way to Chelsea, where he downloaded Aurasma's new ‘manager’ software.  Daniel had purchased Boaz at a knock-down price and could save the money for the world-class striker he would never manage to sign.

And Bale approached the Lord and said the wanted to look beautiful. He said that his ears flapped in the wind and he would do anything to pin them back. And the Lord agreed, providing that Bale would survive a test of faith. Yea, and the Lord put Bale into a deep sleep.  He woke in the morning and his ears were streamlined. He rejoiced and sang hosannas to the Lord.  But being a Spurs supporter, the Lord has a dark sense of humour and did not forget his test.  And so the Lord took from the Kopites a beastly creature with unbridled aggression and no football talent.  In order to strike fear into Bale, the Lord gave the creature a mouth with teeth that looked like the windows of a derelict warehouse and ensured that Irn Bru coursed through its veins. And so on the fields of Bal-timor the creature, confused by its own ridiculous price tag, attacked Bale on his ankle. And Bale wrestled with the creature all night.  In the morning a physio of the Lord came down to tell them stop.  Bale's ligaments were sore but he had prevailed and survived his encounter with the wicked beast. And the physio touched Bale's ankle and Bale was ok.  And that is why Tottenhamites from that day to this do not eat the ligaments served by a Kopite.

And after the early light, suddenly there was darkness from the ITKs. Many Tottenhamites argued that many had got lucky with a few guesses, but all was quiet.  Darkness moved upon the surface of the deep and even Gio was talking about staying. The Tottenhamites looked at the holes in the squad and with the season starting soon, waited for Daniel to rise, do deals and accept the crown of true kingship.

 

 

The Book of Daniel - Chapter Four

The Book of Daniel - Chapter Three

The Book of Daniel - Chapter Two

The Book of Daniel

 

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