Me like Meelan

Hello and apologies to all resident regulars and Levyists. It's that time of year where I might find myself sporadically posting if and when I have the chance to do so thanks to the commitments of Christmas and the seasonal festivities of food, drink and drink. Baby Jesus would approve.

There's hardly that much going on at the moment (transfer target nonsense does not count) other than looking forward to the Xmas fixtures, if they take place. What with snowfall dominating this past weekend we might be in for some more. Took me an hour and a half to get from Bath to Paddington and then four or so hours to somehow navigate my way through the decimated London underground labyrinth. At one point I was so lost I half expected David Bowie to appear out of nowhere, mocking me whilst dancing whimsically. Alas, he didn't, but there were still plenty of muppets standing at the barriers dishing out mis-information about the best route home.

Snow. It's unforgiving and shows no mercy. Cheeky bid? Could do with some of that up front. Talking of which, no game at Blackpool (one of many postponed). Spurs fans who travelled, one or two stayed over thanks to their hotel bookings and enjoyed a night out. Apparently the pitch was good to go in terms of playability (by how much I'm not sure) but the police deemed it all a bit of a risk in terms of safety. Which is fine, gives one or  two players further room for recovery in time for next weekend and the New Year and eliminates playing on a surface that could have given us more knocks. Although there is plenty of debate about people (i.e. fans) being more than capable of travelling to and from a location (i.e. the game) much like people who went to work or travelled for non-footballing matters over the weekend. Spurs fans still went out Saturday night and travelled home the next night, so…ah, it doesn't matter does it? The slush around Bloomfield Road obviously of dangerous ilk. And us simple folk are not to be trusted in numbers.

So up next, weather permitting?

Villa away, Newcastle at home, Fulham at home, Everton away. Four games. 12 points please. Season defining this run of games. I say this in jest because everybody knows that this season is hardly one where sides are building up momentum over 5-10 games. Doesn't mean I can't ask for the moon on a stick, what with it being the time of year when Santa delivers to those that have been good. And we have been very good. Santa, if you're reading, two things. Firstly, never red son, never red. You'd look dapper in white and blue. Secondly, please unload your sack at the Lane. Specifically on the 16th Jan when Manchester United visit.

12 points. Plus an additional three. Equals 15. Moon on a stick? I want Howard Webb on a stick, roasting over a winter bonfire.

One early Crimbo present already on our lap and unwrapped consisted of a plum tie in the first round of knock-out games in the Champions League. Meelan. Away then at home.

Ibra, Pato, Pirlo, Robinho, Ronaldihno, Cassano, Flamini, Kevin Prince Boateng etc etc

Oh wait up.

Pato (I think) is injured. Robinho is the very very short Brazilian version of Peter Crouch (good with his feet rubbish in the air ) but arguably better dance moves. Cassano is decent when he isn't a mentalist which is always. Ronaldihno is more Jar Jar Binks than he is original Ronaldihno and apparently on his way back to Brasil. Flamini? Really? Okay so he's not bad but if we're going to worry about his pace along with the electricity of KPB, we may as well default now.

Inzaghi is injured and could be forced into early retirement at the young age of 37, so sadly no Battle Royal between him and tag team partner Jermain Defoe doubling up against the sly and mischievous offside trap.

Not that I'm dismissing AC Milan. Far from it. One word. Zlatan. Well actually more than one word: Best team in Serie A currently who might not have a great home record (1 W 5 D 3 L) in Europe but are better on their travels (3 W 4 D 2 L). Would much prefer a side we are not expected to beat than one we are expected to beat. The Spurs way. Rather them than a lesser side where complacency might eat us up.

For me, this is the definitive learning curve of our European adventure. You'd expect them to watch a few DVD's, do their homework and do a number on us, exterminating our plucky efforts. You'd expect them to. So do we play to our strengths or play to their weaknesses? Enter the empty clipboard and 'arry.

Looking forward to vdV v Zlatan. Gareth Bale back to the arena where he was invented up against their not as decent as Macion fullback - this could be tasty. All eyes on their deep lying playmaker conductor Pirlo. All eyes on our midfield line-up. No choke in the San Siro. Heads up and focus.

Prediction? Narrow defeat away. Glory Glory night back at the Lane. It's going to be epic. Because the alternative (a spanking or that predicated professional extermination many neutrals and the pessimistic amongst us are whispering) would be disappointing, be it no massive disgrace.

15th and 9th of Feb are the dates to pencil in. If you're wondering, it's Sunderland away on the 12th Feb and FA Cup weekend on the 18th followed by Wolves away on the 5th March (with another FA Cup weakened after it). Busy days, happy days.

I have more to share, but I'll leave it for another pocket of opportunity. 

Back in time for the cup final...

Good Christmas? I had a fairly wonderful Xmas Eve and day, spent with close family, drinking twenty three year old Guatemalan rum and eating plenty. Boxing Day was altogether a rather less pleasant experience. Was meant to be a day spent again with relatives (turkey and mash) after a brief drink or two in the local pub. If it wasn't bad enough that the pub in question was West Ham (Buckhurst Hill), we managed to consume a ridiculous amount of triples, quadruples and shots rendering some of us devoid of the ability to either talk or walk. All this in the space of three hours. There was no dinner (over-cooked and the host almost sliced his finger off when attempting to carve it). Plenty of arguing (the sober ones did not take well to our state and late arrival back) and I apparently spent the next two and half hours hugging the toilet and shivering. I had turned a horrid shade of green. What a light weight. I don't remember much else and what I do (in the form of flashbacks) would be preferable to have remained forgotten. Oh the joys of the festivities. It's all in the name of baby Jesus.

I've seen nothing of the Fulham v Spurs game so read this if you want a quick summary. Family members and friends have told me it was a fair result in the end with Gomes making some pretty ace saves. Great goal for us disallowed thanks to some shabby decision making from the ref. We looked more up for it after JD and Modric came on. And thanks to the organisation of Fulham we spent the early parts of the game hoofing it. Happy with a point then. 3rd clean sheet on the trot. Hopefully tomorrow things will be a little more tidy offensively. Clinical and ruthlessness is the key because I couldn't possibly stomach a Wolves/Stoke type of game/performance.

It's not been a bad half season has it? In fact, it's been pretty good, lots to improve on with steps forward rather than falls backwards. Hopefully we'll remain on track after tomorrow. We do love playing the Hammers. I'm completely out of sorts with the latest news, ITK info and selection teasers - but glad to see Dawson and Bassong continuing their partnership and Gomes with the much deserved plaudits for his keeping. Would like to see Moddle play a bigger part tomorrow also. Might be the right type of game for him, space wise. We'll see.

If there are any major talking points, let me know. Think of this as a self-service blog. You write the content. I'll play catch-up from Tuesday.

LDN Derby Match Preview: Fulham v Spurs – It’s all about the Lily...whites

It's almost Christmas. I can taste it in the air. The cold bitter mornings, the flurries of snow. Bright lights in the high street. Carol singers. Last minute shopping. All the traditional sights and sounds surrounding us all. And let's not be forgetting the turkey. The Christmas turkey. Well that's not quite with us just yet. It's usually dished out by Spurs when we work out Santa won't be the one delivering us the one present we dream of. Three points. You don't get to ask for that. You get given it if deserved. Charity begins at home. Or in this case 'away'.

Fulham away

It's Fulham, all-conquering Zamora-raging Fulham, on Boxing Day. I like Craven Cottage. It's pretty much a decent away day, mainly because of the amount of fans we take there and the locality of the ground and the neighbouring pubs. Their fans are decent folk too. Although that Lily Allen scares me. You know what I'm talking about. With her menacing eye-liner stare and rock'n'roll cigarette smoking. The way she struts around, nipple on show. She's unnerving. And as for her lyrics, they bite their way through societies ills with a touch of satire. She's a high maintenance  woman with plenty of verbal punch that seems to bring out all my insecurities concerning strong-willed women. She's sort of scary but not really. Much like Roy Hodgson's side. Not the showing of nipples (does Bobby have nice tits?) but the 'bringing out insecurities' bit. We sort of get stage fright at the Cottage, when we shouldn't really. Much like I did when I met Lily. Well, actually, technically speaking I didn't meet her per say. I saw her. From a distance. I was sort of walking towards the same place as she was but further back than she was and she didn't see me. Okay, so I was following her home. Some might argue this is considered stalking. And some might agree with this argument. But like I explained to the police officer at the time, it's a free country and I happen to be walking in the same direction as a celebrity and at the same time but at a far slower pace. A mere coincidence I assured him.

We need to go to Fulham, with respect for their form, but also not to be afraid to take the game to them. Have a right go. Do you know what I mean?

I wouldn't mind having a crack at them. At her. I mean I wouldn't mind having her crack...a crack…a crack at Lily Allen. I fancy her in that, 'damn I really hope you look like those GQ pictures in real life' kinda way. Which you sort of did from behind but the clothes you were wearing were a little baggy so it was hard to know if you've been photo-shopped extensively in those glossy mag pictures.

Okay. Right. I'm sorry. I'm losing my way a little. Medication wears off a little too quickly nowadays. And the monitor glare always seems to induce hallucinations. I'm okay. I'm sweating, but I'm fine.

Back on topic. Without the sub plots.

Fighting the trend

As mentioned, we don't much like it there (Fulham away), usually preferring to surrender fairly quickly and let the home side boss and dictate the midfield. We can be distinctively average at Craven Cottage. This being a post-Christmas clash is doubly worrying just because, well I don't know why. I guess I'm living in the past again. Because on current form - as far as we are concerned - we can handle ourselves just fine on our travels. So perhaps there is no need to knee-jerk before the game has even been played out.

The crux of it is, we tend to always fool ourselves into thinking we'll cope with them and yet fail to do so. That 4-0 FA Cup win is the type of repeat performance we can do with. And end this annoyance once and for all. We are decent away from home (repeated again just to drum home the point to myself). So we need to be confident going into this one.

Awesome Dawson

It's going to be won/lost in midfield. Obviously up to Dawson and Bassong (not going to the ANC - not great for him, great for us) to handle 'destroyer of bloggers' Bobby Zamora, rather than allow him to bully our back line, much like he did to King and Woodgate last time out. There was some of that naivety, inexperience away to Everton when the back-line sort of went from steel to jelly. No commanding presence. I noted how Dawson - even though he's 26 years young - has not had a consistent run over a period of seasons, rather bit parts here and there. But with every game, he is handling the responsibility of being the captain with much deserved acclaim. Dare I say, he's vocal? Don't whisper it, shout it. About time we had someone in there screaming out to players, encouraging and organising. He might not be a Ledley King in terms of the three 'C's (cool calm control) but he's still bloody fantastic. A proper honest down to earth hard working footballer who is not that bad of a player and has no qualms about rolling up his sleeves and getting dirty. He puts himself in there. He's got a bit of Tottenham in him. And one day so will Lily.

He could save us a few bob in the transfer market if he continues to impress in this fashion. I'm hearing 'Upson' get mentioned once too often in recent days and for whatever price is being tagged on him, I say 'no'. Change of tune here. We might just be alright at the back if Harry shows continued faith in our boy Daws. As for the Sunderland rumour. Do one. Lazy hacks.

Tactics

As for Fulham. Duff, Murphy and Dempsey will pose a threat so we need Wilson to enforce and protect and break-up play and Huddlestone (stats wise, he's in the top 5 best midfielders in the country for pass completion and apparently has more interceptions than Palacios - WOW) to work hard making sure there is no separation of partnership and no over-running done by the opposition. Yes, I said Hudd has to work hard. Which might mean we see Jenas play. I'm like a broken record with this. Every match preview, I ask if Hudd is suited for the next game and if there's a suspicion he might struggle then I suggest that the opposite of Tommy (high energy) has to be the resolution. Who would you have? Is there even a difference? I'd say there is and that Huddlestone offers more. Although when he is found lost in the mix, he can become redundant pretty quickly. Jenasesque almost. Or perhaps not. Perhaps its time to shut the fuck up about Hudd and take note of what he does on pitch.

I'm actually unable to decide on this midfield conundrum. Huddlestone starts every game. As much as some of us stand with thumbs pointing downwards, he must be doing something right to retain his place (check out the opta stats on the Sky Sports site). And as much as we'd like to believe Palacios does all the hard grafting, Tommy does get involved. The problem is the balance of that partnership is perhaps a little lopsided at the moment.

Same question for Crouch/Keane. Peter of Clancy could cause them some trouble, climbing all over their centre-backs, fouling them to his heart’s content. Scored two at Blackburn, so unless Harry uses his rotation excuse, he'll remain in the starting line-up. He can't really be dropped, not if Keane is still being punished for his Orish indiscretions. Which isn't the case at all. He's on the bench because he's not been very good. But don't be telling the hacks that because their back pages will dry up.

Conclusion

You know, re-thinking this, in the way of tactics or even a player-to-player comparison with the Fulham lads - its probably completely unnecessary. Not in the way of menacing disrespect. They are a plucky side, a decent one. But more the case that we - Spurs - are more than capable of going there and winning. We have the quality and we've shown the heart. Rather than take it for granted, all that Harry has to acquire from the players is yet more backbone and intent. And we've done that in practically all of our away games so far. So it's not so much as expecting the win but knowing, deep down, we are more than capable of doing so if the application is there.

I say, go forth and attack.

If the defence remain alert and Palacios/whomever fight for every ball then the likes of Lennon and Kranjcar will have time to do their usual hurting of the opposition. Basic football 101. Play as a unit, for each other, and play to our strengths. Going to Fulham on the back foot would be an embarrassment. Going there and limply rolling over and getting tickled would be humiliating.

As a way of comparison, watch how the Fulham players take the game to us on the day. They will not rest on their laurels or the glory of their recently released club DVD celebrating their 3-0 thrashing of Man Utd (they did release a DVD, right?).

We have to create hype rather than believe it.

That's almost it folks. One more blog (possibly) to come before Xmas and then I'll be back in front of a pc on Monday 28th Jan looking forward to 2010, West Ham at home and a month’s worth of detox. Have a wonderful Christmas. Hope Santa unloads his sack with everything you could ever wish for. And perhaps this time next year I'll be unloading my own sack when I finally get Lily alone.

Or from afar. With binoculars. Same difference. The end result is always going to be the same. I'll eat pizza and fall asleep.