You've destroyed our club
Sunday, September 2, 2012 at 8:02PM Dear Mr Levy,
Thank you.
Thank you for completing me. I was a straitjacket short of a padded cell. But now I have it all. There’s even a little foam on the corner of my mouth. So thank you for my current state of mind, a consequence of you systematically dismantling the great club that Harry Redknapp built with his bare hands. Thank you for this empire of dirt, these ashes in a broken urn you have left for myself and my brethren to mourn over. Thank you for the cataclysm. Please send in the doctors. Order me a lobotomy, save me from witnessing further disgrace. Any minute now, Keith Burkinshaw will appear as a vision to remind me that there was once a football club here. You’ve managed to reanimate the dead after the wilderness of the 1990s only to bury it alive. You are accountable for this shambolic mess. But it’s okay, it’s of no major personal concern to you. It's all gone wrong so you can easily point the blame at the fall guy you’ve appointed in place of Harry then hire the next mug in or simply beg Redknapp to return to fix this crisis.
You didn't back Villas-Boas on purpose which means your failure is really a clever little escape clause. I know your game. Waiting until the final day to do business because you know how improbable it is to get the job done so late in the transfer window. You signed Dempsey because you knew Moutinho wouldn’t happen. Why would it when there are so many complexities involved in his transfer? So many that a day’s worth of hard graft was nigh impossible to iron them all out. He was Villas-Boas number one target and you purposely side-stepped it so that the money from the Luka Modric transfer can sit in that diamond encrusted shoe box under your bed. Hugo Lloris, another mastermind manoeuvre although you seem to have ballsed this one up. The player actually signed in the end, even with your attempts to stall and change the offer made to Lyon during negotiations. How dare you show such contempt for opposing clubs, a blatant reluctance to play into their hands and accept their demands over your own? Who the hell do you think you are? Shameful you are representative of THFC. How dare you cater for your own interests, nursing your agendas. You make my skin crawl.
Where was the £30M bid for Falcao? Llorente? Leandro? You were too busy pushing out club legend Rafa van der Vaart and failing to match valuations for our other alleged targets. You know the ones, refresh NewsNow or tune into Sky Sports News, they had a long list of them. Oh but wait, you signed Dembele. Whoop de doo. Let’s raid Fulham and it will be a-okay. In January we should look at pillaging Reading and if we’re feeling really really ambitious we can swagger on up to Anfield and pluck some of their gems.
We’re really aiming high aren’t we? If it was up to you Dawson, Defoe and Huddlestone would have been thrown onto the scrap-heap alongside Ledley King, cruelly casted out whilst you allow ex-gooners like Adebayor get richer at the cost of hiking up our season tickets. Oh wait, newsflash, you've improved the catering at White Hart Lane. Well that's okay then. At least we won't cry our eyes out at the disarray on the pitch on empty stomachs. To add further insult to injury we are now that little club in England that Jose can tap up if he wants something new for his big team in Madrid. Should I burn my Gareth Bale shirt now or wait until his transfer is confirmed next summer? I just can't get over this transfer window and your last minute attempts at signing players. Do you set your alarm to go off on the last day of August as a reminder to do some business? But it's all good isn't it? Because you can now swap Panini stickers with Florentino Pérez and share up-skirt pictures via instant messenger. He looks the type.
I’m furious.
You have once more screwed this club over. Selling off players along with that aforementioned refusal to meet the demands of other chairman, preferring instead to bully and play with them until they are tearful and broken. You need to consider other people’s feelings, our feelings, and stop being so self-absorbed on this ‘project’ you seem to be running into the North London ground. We’ve got money, I know we have. We sold Modric, so splash it around a bit. You saving it for a rainy day? We’re rich. That bloke who lives out in the Bahamas, he’s a billionaire God damn it.
We should be signing Champions League quality players and paying them a kings ransom to wear our shirt. But oh no, God forbid you speculate to accumulate. Let me guess, boo hoo, we need money for the stadium. Bore off. What stadium? You think a bit of scaffolding and cement mixers can fool me?
As for Villas-Boas, you've out done yourself there. The closest he ever got to playing football was reading a book about it and learning tactics and formation on a computer. He shouldn't be managing a Sunday league club let alone us. He's a researcher at best. Who's next in line? Anthony Costa? We never played this poorly under Redknapp. I refuse to give him a chance, I simply refuse. Anything below 4th is a disgrace and we're currently 14th. Unacceptable and believe me I'm being patient here. I was patient on Saturday against Norwich. I didn't start to abuse the manager until late on. I waited until the 15th minute. This isn't a transition, it's a crisis!
I've been a supporter for decades but I will never set foot back into White Hart Lane again until you are removed and gone. Okay, granted, the restraining order doesn't allow me within a mile of the stadium, but my disdain will see me boycott EA Sports games and not purchase any Under Armour gear. Apart from one of the white training tops which looks spiffing. So have some of that corporate Tottenham.
The points lost at the start of the season because of your reluctance to do business early and get in the players to replace the departing ones have cost us any chance of finishing top four. Our season is OVER. Have you looked at the table? MIND THE GAPS. Plural, that's plural.
You have sold our soul to the devil, then nicked it back, then sold it back to us only to then take a reward from the devil when pointing him in the direction of his stolen property. This, this ugly abomination of a club is what you've birthed from your greed and self-absorption. I am Gregory Peck in The Omen when he digs up that coffin in the ruined cemetery to find a jackal's skeleton in Damien's mother's grave. I'm Gregory f**king Peck! You've turned us all into Gregory Peck!
I hope you like the number ten. It’s not a shirt number Daniel. It’s the position we'll be sitting in come May. And the number 666 is no doubt glistening with pride somewhere on your body.
Yours devastatingly,
Spooky
Reader Comments (220)
Cue lots of idiots agreeing with this and not realising it is a piece of satire.
Tumbleweed......looks nervously around to see if Spooky has been got at!
Whispers..........coys............
Patience is a virtual reality simulator. Let's ride it for a while.
Loved it. Truly entertaining and it's about time some of these "fans" who give our club a bad name get some publicity. Guarantee that one of them will be reading that thinking they've finally found someone who speaks sense, who understand where they're coming from.
The club needed a philosphy change before we move to the new stadium ( then we can the big wages, and transfer fees, meaning top class players will come in). This will not be a quick fix, instant top 4. Top 4 is a bonus this year! Patience!!
That is so true
That was amazing m8! AVB has been given enuff tym! Get him out and get Harry back
I agred with it even if it is satire
I'm not sure it is satire, there's a lot of home truths in there. Yes Moutinho should have been snapped up, yes Llorrente should have been signed and yes Leandro should have been tied into a 5 year deal.
But they didn't and now we look underpowered up front and there's a huge Modric shaped hole in the middle of our midfield.
It's gonna be a long season...
ENIC are there for their own gain at little investment ,ready to sell on for a fat profit.
We are so unlucky to have the tightest multi billionaire in the world . Tax dodge Lewis.
This will always be the root of the bitterness and never be sorted till sweet Jesus saves us.
AVB out! We aren't top after three games. Someone can take my season ticket because I don't want to watch Spurs anymore. I want Harry back and Louis Saha leading the front-line
Meh. Despite your sarcasm, you seem to condone Levy not signing a Modric replacement because he "tried." If managers were judged on "trying", none would ever be sacked. The fact remains he did not replace Modric and we are left with a weaker side. Whether he "tried" or not is irrelevant. We set a goal of reaching fourth for eons and now that we have obtained, there seems to be no plan how to solidify that position or god forbid, kick on. Unfortunately, the scapegoat for that is going to be AVB and not Levy. But don't piss on my head and tell me its raining.
You rule. Can we elect you King of all spurs fans or something? Comes with powers to summarily execute everyone whose opinions you have just channelled so accurately
Me thinks you protest too much. By satirising it does it somehow neutralise the reality of it.?
Many a true word spoken in jest, it wouldnt work unless it is actually all feasible.
I,ve got a good idea! Lets stand on the terraces an boo the players and manager!!
That bloke who lives in the Bahamas is Daniel Levy's uncle............. apparently.
#bringharryback
Can we retain at least a modicom of perspective and at least play a full first choice XI before we start judging the transfer window?
Nobody is that deluded, surely, to suggest that new manager transitions are seemless? nor that we should judge until we've played our new first choice XI in enough games they understand how to play with each other?
Old mantra says patience is a virtue...
avb has been sent to destroy all english clubs, were the latest victims
I think some fans need to cool their engines and stop calling for the sacking of AVB, we need to win yes. But he needs time to get the team playing right. Cut the guy some slack and stop calling for sackings of any type, but if we do sack someone please sack the tea lady, she looks dodgy.
Excellent amusing piece, some 'fans' need to get real. Sad to lose Rafa, but we have had an incredible summer. COYS
Wow talk about an over-reaction, do you throw a hissy fit every time you break a nail? Club Legend Van Der Vaart, fantastic player and a some great performances but club legend.? If we have six points at the end of October then post this again but lets not over react.
I can't believe some of the crap I,m reading! How long have some of you been supporters? 30 months or so!!!!
I wonder if you could do a flipside piece parodying the inlevywetrust gang.
And more to the point if that piece would ring as true, or spill as easily and effortlessly onto the page.
Im guessing not, which is perhaps why you havent even attempted to provide any counter points to the many viewpoints you habe attempted to parody.
Appreciate the article here Spooky, it had me chuckling. Whilst I am not disappointed with the team we have amassed during this transfer window, I do not think we are as strong as we were last season simply because we did not sign moutinho and a decent striker. I also think we are weaker in terms of the manager, not that I am saying Harry was the best thing since sliced bread, but because we appear to have a spineless weasel with less personality than my right testicle (the smaller of the two) leading our club. Already seen some very questionable decisions from him and do not think he is cut out to take us further than where we have been the last 3 seasons.
These are the rantings if an idiot. An ignorant man.
Nothing like wasting time on a feeble strawman
Clever little shits aren't we with our 'look at me' 'more intelligent than thou' 'satire'. Well let me break it to you, satire doesn't build great football teams or for that matter stop other club's fans laughing at us. 14th in the league and looking nothing like the side we have done in the past few years, but hey that's ok because we have got 'satire'. You never know perhaps AVB will revert to 442 and play 'satire' alongside Adebayor!
Effin' furious - only Spurs could shoot themselves in the foot like we have. Only two games you say? Emperors new clothes I say!
in my opinion if levy hated harry so much why didnt he leave him in charge ,then sell all of our players without sufficently replacing them that way harry would have looked a mug and all of the fans would have turned on him instead of being split.or would harry have made it work ?then levy would have someone far too highly thought of than he thinks he is. levy needs to put his money where his big negotiating mouth is and back his man.or is AVB his sacraficial lamb waiting to be slaughtered.
Lol @ 'Richard'.should've signed Llorente,Damiao and Moutinho....deary me dick (may I call you dick? I'm sure most people do) you're exactly the type of unrealistic imbecile this blog is aimed at. No CL, no significant global brand awareness and a 36,000 capacity stadium. Could you explain to me where the money is supposed to come from? Underpowered upfront? Between them our 3 forwards (yes, Dempsey is a forward) scored 58 goals last season. Hardly underpowered. Levy tried to sign Moutinho, it didn't happen. Get over it.
Get off Levy's back, get off AVB's back and support the team.
Love the shirt or fuck off
It's good to get it off your chest Spooky. What happened the £50m that Harry was promised when we wanted to sign him up during his England flirtation? Does that not mean we now have at least £60m sitting in a box under Levy's bed with a large scribble on it saying 'rainy day fund'? Did he deliberately ignore Moutinho? I am now sweating blood. I'm glad that you are angry, someone has to be at least until I and others shake off this stupor and depression. I'm going back to bed.
AVB OUT, LEVY OUT. EVERYONE OUT.. In all seriousness our performance against Newcastle was decent, and in the first half against West Brom - we were excellent. The first half against Norwich was poor. The second half was a bit better. I was concerned about the lack of movement and tempo. It seemed like many (especially the full backs) were told to hold back. But then again I think about our performances against West Brom and Norwich in the second half of last season. The Norwich performance was horrible, and against WBA we really struggled to break them down. We did beat WBA at the end but it was not convincing. Clearly there is a lack of confidence now, and letting in a goal in each of the games in the last 10 minutes is concerning. Hopefully with all the transfer sagas over (until Jan!), avb can properly figure out his team. Even though I rate Sandro higher than Parker, I think Parker, Ade and Dembele starting will give us that spark. Also can Dempsey play on the right. Lennon is just not performing consistently enough and the likes of him and Defoe would be great to have as impact subs
Its funny cos its true,a bit. Think VB should shave his head and then kick the fuck out of j*****.
This is not satire. It's total bollocks. Got enough knobhead fans ramping up the pressure on AVB without our own fans writing shit like this.
And if you cannot see that Dembele is one of the the most talented players in the Prem then you do need help.
Apart from that everything all right mate?
Pizzle, shizzle my dizzle.
Not satire, all true. Levy egotistical, believes his own hype, no clue. Just dismantled best team seen at the lane for the last 30 years at least. Avb so clueless it's comical. He will be gone by new year. Hope levy goes too, the sooner the better. Disgruntled.
Some fans make me laugh. Do u not realise this is football ur never guaranteed a win. We have no Parker modric is gone vdv is gone just got ade back no more king. Were re building r team new formation and new players and new manager and staff. So give it time and try to remember we lost last season to Norwich we drew last season to WBA. 1st 2 games we deserved wins but sme times it dnt go for u that's the nature of this sport. So think about it and stop acting like Chelsea fans and get behind the club. The booing was disgracefull and it wnt help our beloved team.
nonsense
I started supporting Spurs proper in about 1988. I was 10. The reason for me being so late to the party with regards to following football and an actual league team is long winded and not for here.
My point is that aside from the last 4 years, I have witnessed 1 FA cup and 2 League cup successes. These were the highlights, as the rest of those 20 years were made up of some pretty die football and performances. This was despite some amazing players gracing the shirt. Despite this, I have never once left early and I have never ever booed a Tottenham player.
I was going to say something about how long Christian Gross lasted as manager, and it was at this point I discovered that he lasted 9 months. Wikipedia has a very interesting summary of his tenure at WHL, but the most poignant bit was the last sentence; "Gross' position became increasingly untenable as the 1998–99 season approached, and when Spurs lost two of their opening three matches, chairman Alan Sugar decided enough was enough and ended Gross' contract, blaming the media for destroying his reputation."
It sounds like this time around, not only the media but sections of our own fans are trying to break this record by about 7 or 8 months. This I find truly depressing.
Fuck me, they've let them all out!
Delusional retards, conveniently forget we went 9 games at the back end of last season and picked up 6 points?
6. With Modric. With VdV. Where you moaning then? Demanding change? If not, why not? and why give up on AVB after just THREE games?
If you spat your dummy then too, why are you complaining? You got what you wanted.
How about just supporting the team?
If that's not for you, there's plenty of ignorant knee jerk cunts at the emirates, you'll fit right in
.........its not that we havent won a game yet......its the fact that we dont look like we know where their goal is that worries me! Dont look like anyones enjoying being on the pitch.....looks like they are all trying to think too much rather than do!! Good at knocking the ball around in midfield, and good at falling asleep with 5 minutes to go!!! Gotta give "The Project" time to work, but this is a fakkin shite start to our "Project"......
The geezer that wrote this is nufin short of a two bob cunt who aint a fan of anything other the sound of he's own voice do us all a favour n fuck off u melt
U were the bloke sitting behind me yesterday booing at half time weren't u? I always think a good boo makes the players play well. Might try it more often, worked alright yesterday.
Jeez, I've never known Spurs fans talk such drivel. If I hear one more 'bring back Harry' I'll top meself. he's gone and good riddance to him. Thanks to his total incompetence we blew a nailed on third place last season and the season before that we blew up again and blew forth place.
Levy has his faults, that I agree. He should have gone after a decent striker and push the boat out for Moutinho, hopefully that'll happen in january. But for crying out loud give AVB a chance and start supporting the club we all love.
Others have said the opening thread is satire, that maybe so, but I think it's about time we starting getting behind the team and the management. I suppose some peoples idea of supporting the team is to boo them off the pitch, yeah that'll really boost the team and show how much the fans support them.
One thing is for sure, Harry Redknapp is history and long may that be so, his race was run and I wouldn't mind betting the decision was made when the team capitulated so meekly against Norwich last season at The Lane.
I don't agree with some of the decisions the management has made but I will always support the club I have loved for over 50 years.
I just ask that we all get behind the club, the good times will return, we have far too many great players for them not to.
Rant over.
Levy is the best thing to happen to our club, we dont have to look further than arsepaste .liverpool. newky brown utd. man utd man titty or every other premier club to see the kind of scum who are buying up top english teams .,so we got three games without a win and we have to ,sack the manager, sack the chairman, sack the board . bla bla bla, get real fellow spurs supporters, the premireship league is a marathon ,not a nine second hundred metre sprint. AVB will turn us into the team that can challenge regularly for the top targets of premier championship and champions league.by the way ,who was in charge when we threw away the chance to win the premiership last season, then threw away second and third places??thats why he got himself sacked. also we got lucky when we beat young boys to qualify for the champions leaguse, harry had no idea on how to play at that level.
Never thought I'd say this but!!! Levy is a total idiot. Couldn't agree persnal terms with Moutinho. What a joke. Agreed the fee with Porto, personal terms should have been the easy bit. We made a profit without even touching Sky's money. Levy should hang his head and grovel to Harry to rescue our season. I was all for giving AVB every chance but it is obvious he hasn't a clue.
Lets get rid off all the players who got us to 4th, 5th and 4th again. and bring Mr Average. Looks like Tottenham of old. We wil be lucky to finish mid table with tweedle dub and tweedle dee.
Levy should resign and Harry brought back.
deluding yourself again Spooky and no amount of pointless satire will change the facts. You're missing the point. All the aims you highlight through your satire could have been achieved by giving Redknapp a bit of support. He got us to fourth last season despite being undermined by Levy and reduced to signing free transfers. Nobody is saying we always played well under Redknapp but the majority of the time we did and surely it would have been a lot easier to strengthen the the existing squad with a settled manager rather than rip it up and start again. You only have to listen to the comments of neutrals to get an idea of how crazy this decision is. Opposition that were frightened of us are now laughing at us. There was no logical reason, known to the general public,to sack Redknapp so you have to question the real motive behind it. As far as selling the family silver to pay for marquee signings again you're wide of the mark. Spurs fans that I talk to would have been happy with a playmaker to replace Modric , a striker to replace Pav and a central defender to replace Ledley . The money would have been raised by the sales we have made previously, Corluka, Pienaar, Krancjar and Pav plus Gio and Modric so don't insult genuine fans by suggesting we would like Levy to do a Leeds. You seem to be blinded by the spin of a man said to be the hardest of hard nosed businessmen. If you're going to make comment perhaps it should be more balanced and not full of satirical nonsense. Cheers
What a load of shit, if anyone reading the above agree's and thinks they are a "Spurs supporter" look again the clue is in the question "SUPPORTER" a supporter, supports the team, the manager and the chairman. Yes we've not had the best of starts but it's better than last year, a point at home to Norwich is a point gained on last season. Great idea support the club or fuck off !! COYS
Signed
A True Spurs fan,
Not a shit cunt gooner in disguise.
Jesus calm down it's been 3 games and we have only just got All our players in. Patience is needed. and if u really have been a spurs supporter for decades u wouldn't grumble at all as levy has brought us some of our best moments in decades. Remember when we had jose Dominguez.....rule fox.....acimovic.......Howells.....vega.......chris Armstrong......all of our signings in this window have been good ones. Granted it could of been better but u can only do business if the other club wants to