You've destroyed our club
Sunday, September 2, 2012 at 8:02PM Dear Mr Levy,
Thank you.
Thank you for completing me. I was a straitjacket short of a padded cell. But now I have it all. There’s even a little foam on the corner of my mouth. So thank you for my current state of mind, a consequence of you systematically dismantling the great club that Harry Redknapp built with his bare hands. Thank you for this empire of dirt, these ashes in a broken urn you have left for myself and my brethren to mourn over. Thank you for the cataclysm. Please send in the doctors. Order me a lobotomy, save me from witnessing further disgrace. Any minute now, Keith Burkinshaw will appear as a vision to remind me that there was once a football club here. You’ve managed to reanimate the dead after the wilderness of the 1990s only to bury it alive. You are accountable for this shambolic mess. But it’s okay, it’s of no major personal concern to you. It's all gone wrong so you can easily point the blame at the fall guy you’ve appointed in place of Harry then hire the next mug in or simply beg Redknapp to return to fix this crisis.
You didn't back Villas-Boas on purpose which means your failure is really a clever little escape clause. I know your game. Waiting until the final day to do business because you know how improbable it is to get the job done so late in the transfer window. You signed Dempsey because you knew Moutinho wouldn’t happen. Why would it when there are so many complexities involved in his transfer? So many that a day’s worth of hard graft was nigh impossible to iron them all out. He was Villas-Boas number one target and you purposely side-stepped it so that the money from the Luka Modric transfer can sit in that diamond encrusted shoe box under your bed. Hugo Lloris, another mastermind manoeuvre although you seem to have ballsed this one up. The player actually signed in the end, even with your attempts to stall and change the offer made to Lyon during negotiations. How dare you show such contempt for opposing clubs, a blatant reluctance to play into their hands and accept their demands over your own? Who the hell do you think you are? Shameful you are representative of THFC. How dare you cater for your own interests, nursing your agendas. You make my skin crawl.
Where was the £30M bid for Falcao? Llorente? Leandro? You were too busy pushing out club legend Rafa van der Vaart and failing to match valuations for our other alleged targets. You know the ones, refresh NewsNow or tune into Sky Sports News, they had a long list of them. Oh but wait, you signed Dembele. Whoop de doo. Let’s raid Fulham and it will be a-okay. In January we should look at pillaging Reading and if we’re feeling really really ambitious we can swagger on up to Anfield and pluck some of their gems.
We’re really aiming high aren’t we? If it was up to you Dawson, Defoe and Huddlestone would have been thrown onto the scrap-heap alongside Ledley King, cruelly casted out whilst you allow ex-gooners like Adebayor get richer at the cost of hiking up our season tickets. Oh wait, newsflash, you've improved the catering at White Hart Lane. Well that's okay then. At least we won't cry our eyes out at the disarray on the pitch on empty stomachs. To add further insult to injury we are now that little club in England that Jose can tap up if he wants something new for his big team in Madrid. Should I burn my Gareth Bale shirt now or wait until his transfer is confirmed next summer? I just can't get over this transfer window and your last minute attempts at signing players. Do you set your alarm to go off on the last day of August as a reminder to do some business? But it's all good isn't it? Because you can now swap Panini stickers with Florentino Pérez and share up-skirt pictures via instant messenger. He looks the type.
I’m furious.
You have once more screwed this club over. Selling off players along with that aforementioned refusal to meet the demands of other chairman, preferring instead to bully and play with them until they are tearful and broken. You need to consider other people’s feelings, our feelings, and stop being so self-absorbed on this ‘project’ you seem to be running into the North London ground. We’ve got money, I know we have. We sold Modric, so splash it around a bit. You saving it for a rainy day? We’re rich. That bloke who lives out in the Bahamas, he’s a billionaire God damn it.
We should be signing Champions League quality players and paying them a kings ransom to wear our shirt. But oh no, God forbid you speculate to accumulate. Let me guess, boo hoo, we need money for the stadium. Bore off. What stadium? You think a bit of scaffolding and cement mixers can fool me?
As for Villas-Boas, you've out done yourself there. The closest he ever got to playing football was reading a book about it and learning tactics and formation on a computer. He shouldn't be managing a Sunday league club let alone us. He's a researcher at best. Who's next in line? Anthony Costa? We never played this poorly under Redknapp. I refuse to give him a chance, I simply refuse. Anything below 4th is a disgrace and we're currently 14th. Unacceptable and believe me I'm being patient here. I was patient on Saturday against Norwich. I didn't start to abuse the manager until late on. I waited until the 15th minute. This isn't a transition, it's a crisis!
I've been a supporter for decades but I will never set foot back into White Hart Lane again until you are removed and gone. Okay, granted, the restraining order doesn't allow me within a mile of the stadium, but my disdain will see me boycott EA Sports games and not purchase any Under Armour gear. Apart from one of the white training tops which looks spiffing. So have some of that corporate Tottenham.
The points lost at the start of the season because of your reluctance to do business early and get in the players to replace the departing ones have cost us any chance of finishing top four. Our season is OVER. Have you looked at the table? MIND THE GAPS. Plural, that's plural.
You have sold our soul to the devil, then nicked it back, then sold it back to us only to then take a reward from the devil when pointing him in the direction of his stolen property. This, this ugly abomination of a club is what you've birthed from your greed and self-absorption. I am Gregory Peck in The Omen when he digs up that coffin in the ruined cemetery to find a jackal's skeleton in Damien's mother's grave. I'm Gregory f**king Peck! You've turned us all into Gregory Peck!
I hope you like the number ten. It’s not a shirt number Daniel. It’s the position we'll be sitting in come May. And the number 666 is no doubt glistening with pride somewhere on your body.
Yours devastatingly,
Spooky
Reader Comments (220)
What a load of bollocks, shit article. Many a true word is said in Jest and the dick head of an author has hit the nail unintentionally, squarely on the head.
Pathlological hatred of HR is what drives you prats on. If we finish 17th, 18th and 17th you will still be droning on, writing smug satirical bollocks, insinuating intellectual superiority and ridiculing anyone that doesn't agree that we should give the clueless one time.
When AVB gets us playing what is universally aclaimed as the best football in the league and in a position where we have an option to throw away a 13 point lead over Arsenal, wake me up. I don't expect to be aroused from my nightmare any time soon.
finally i,ve found someone who finks like i do, utterly brilliant agree wiv every word up and and coming genius a proper spurs fan. those who disagree, get your head out of the sand and wake up cos being an ostrich is a total waiste of time. i could go and say SO much more... but this man has said it all. CONGRATULATIONS!.
The headline of this waste of space does far more damage to Spurs by appearing on the News Now page than Levy has ever done by raking in an extra few million quid by disregarding fans' feelings. His job is to make Joe Lewis and any other stakeholders happy, not the instant sport journo know-it-alls who've just discovered how to use the internet. And who is the idiot that published this trash on his website? Seriously, some fool actually sat down and wrote all of this nonsense, how pathetic must they be.
It does far more damage to Spurs by appearing on a news feed? Get a grip mate. The damage is done down at the Lane by moronic fools that start complaining after 20 minutes and booing at half time. The 'instant sport journo know-it-alls who've just discovered how to use the internet' is pretty funny on several levels so wondering if you're throwing satire back my way. I'm no different to any other Spurs fan and not as important either just because I share my thoughts on the club online. I just happen to do that and you along with others just happen to read those thoughts.But hey, you wanted to let me know how pathetic I was so thank you for taking the time to post.
Seriously, what's your point? Football fans are not really footballs fans if they blog? Boo hiss.
I was at Eurodisney over the weekend and some of the goofy posters on here should get jobs there. I spoke to a Liverpool fan who was at the game. They were abysmal to the point that they made Diaby look good, but no one booed their team. I see that HR piled more pressure on AVB by stating categorically that we would get top four; he did so without looking at Lineker and scratching the back of his head. I wonder if that's what they call a "tell".
lol sperz... Appointing Redknapp was a mistake in the first place. I'd be shocked if the club doesn't end up in administration or near bankruptcy like every other place he's been.
Yes, I'm a Gooner, and I find your current squad hilarious. Hopefully Villas-Boas will work his magic on your defense like he did with Chelsea's last term, and you'll finish below Liverpool.
Adebayor,
Adebayorrr,
We sold him for 25, and now he's worth 4!
A Cannoneur went out to gaze at the false dawn.........
Dear Bellends,
This is satire.
Yours sincerely,
Someone who isn't a walking embarrassment with fetal alcohol syndrome determined to turn his club into a laughing stock
So Harry piled more pressure on AVB by saying spurs would get top 4? Pathetic. And what would you have said if he said we were hopeless and be lucky to make top half? In fact what could he possibly have said that would appease the haters? Grow up ffs
I have read every comment, and enjoyed them all. As I live in OZ I haven't been to WHL in over 30 years. However I do have Satellite TV and have watched every Spurs game LIVE for the past 10 years. I know we have lost King, Modric, VDV and HR. They have been replaced by 6 + AVB. For the past few years we have been the easiest team to watch, with fast flowing attacking football. The old Spurs tradition of the silky touch, quick movement was there for all to see. We looked great and it made sitting up late at night to watch well worth the effort. However the last 3 games would have been unacceptable for a Championship side. The team looked lost, all at sea without a rudder. Woeful in fact. I would remind everyone that AVB and his tactics turned Chelsea into a very poor team very quickly. Makes you think doesn't it.
Spooky - looks like Talksport have missed/chosen to ignore the point of this and used it as a stick to beat the club with on their website... They've got a nice big image of your web page as part of how the fans are annoyed with the club... which i know to be the opposite of the effect you wanted.
Dan Mac that is because Spookys article is NOT satire. His article is a well written piece with a humorous vein detailing the legitimate concerns of an ever increasing number of genuine Spurs supporters. Labelling the piece Satire does not make it anymore so than my beans on toast is codron bleu cooking. It lacks the essential ingredients of caustic wit and irony plus the garnish of many other nuances. Unfortunately for Spooky the only Irony is on him that he has produced a piece that is understandably being taken at face value by any one who truyly cares for the club and has the back bone to stand up and be counted rather than waiting 6 months for the inevitable implosion!
Let`s all suffer a major attack of nostalgia and tunnel vision shall we?
Those pining for Harry are referring to pre- Febraury Harry. Long gone. Plus if you allow yourselves to look forward for a moment - if his ticker were to give out again - yeah let`s please have Bond in charge for some more toe curling performances like Liverpool away.
Those moaning about Modric not being replaced - you are missing the Modric in a Spurs shirt of two seasons ago. Long gone.
VDV? Loved him, but Sandro in London or Mrs VDV in Hamburg. Whch Brazilian would YOU rather play with?
Those who say our dealings have weakened our squad, let me point to De Jong, Johnson, Adebayor out, Maicon, Wright and Sinclair in. Yes, that`s the illustrious champions who are apparently disappearing over the horizon.
Spilt milk, water under the bridge, whatever you want to call it, it`s history so PLEASE start looking forward and support the team.
Imagine being Lloris or Dempsey. Both play in `confidence` positions. If you were either of them how much would you be looking fiorward to your debut in the current atmosphere?
If you see my point, then please stop creating the negative atmosphere. This is what is meant by patience. Not blind patience til the end of time, measured patience - just give the new manager and players a chance.
Forward not backwards! COYS.
Your a f.......g ass for even writing s..t like this.
Its fools like you who make us the laughing stock.
If this is how u feel go support the arse.
Its only been 3 games!
You know we were close on Mouthino(he will sign in january) and Dembele is a star in the making.
If AVB was English you would think he is great.
Harry is a self centered conman who was only looking out for his best interests.
If Harry was there we would have signed Joey Barton,Michael Owen and any other old english has been.
Harry only signed players who's agents he knew personally.....see my drift?
Who the hell do u think it was who signed VanDe Vaart? Levy!
The dutchman who thought he should start every game even if he was injured or had 6 stinkers in a row.
I am worried about Ade being our main striker though. The c..t is afraid of the penalty area and does not shoot.
NOW F... OFF AND GO SUPPORT SOME OTHER TEAM!
It's like satire and comedy had a try hard unfunny child with learning disabilities and it learned to write.
It's like you've never visited this blog before and assume it's satire.
It's not necessarily clever or difficult to write thanks to the source material (you) but it's the impact it makes where it should be judged. From where I'm sitting it's done it's job perfectly well.
heh alright mate. If it's not satire, it's just embarrassing. Your pick.
Smug sense of superiority there for someone who basically said nothing.
I'm just as smug as you.
The article is self-deprecating, something I thought most Spurs fans were good at considering the history we've had in recent years. Satire? Exaggerations? Knee-jerks? Punctured with some truths and some actual direct quotes. That last one is important. Some of the most stupid things stated in that article were stated by Spurs fans. Embarrassing? Yeah, sure. I agree.
I get four types of reactions from these letters:
1) LOL
2) You're a gooner cunt fuck off and support someone else
3) I agree with everything you say
4) I don't agree with you
So say, 3 out of 4 people actually read it and take it at face value. If you don't think the article is funny that's cool, I'll survive, but I think it's fascinating how some people will read something and through their own perseverance to push their own agenda completely miss the ridiculousness of it. If that's me mugging people off to prove a point that people knee-jerk or whatever then so be it. It's just some words on website. The reader gives it credence. Or not.
haha, I do sound like a smug git don't I?
...This is the article that caused a "change in approach"?
I've been reading this blog for years and this style is evident in many previous pieces. And its brilliant writing.
I think someone has an agenda against Spooky.