MatchDay Frolics: Inter v Spurs

Time for another bout of alternative minute-by-minute comment based musings of the game. Live.

It's Inter versus Spurs.

It all stems from myself requiring in-game therapy by sharing my observations because I need to vent and also strike up a bromance or two with my fellow Spurs fans. Because if you're at home and not in the pub and on your own, then it helps to have others suffering along with you, be it electronically.

This minute-by-minute commentary is not as consistent in terms of structure as the Beeb's version and definitely not as witty and pun-driven as the Guardians. But a f**k load better than ITV's in-game audio commentary. Which, let's face it, isn't exactly the greatest brag in the world. Chiles and company are akin to listening to diarrhetic elephants emptying their bowels, so this blog will easily suffice as a superior companion to the game than the giddy nonsense churned out by the incompetent guardians of the tactic truck.

Point being, unlike the rest, it's all-Spurs.

Rather than update this blog article with dated-by-time comments, I'm going to use the magic of  curated Tweets. So if you follow me on Twitter, you'll see my inane statements of insight as the game progresses. Otherwise, just stay tuned to the below where the curated tweets will appear. I'll also throw in other words of wisdom from fellow Twitter based Spurs fans for additional ample scoffs of hilarity.

To be honest, this is all experimental and it might turn out to be far easier to just update a standard article. Or even easier for you to just sign up to Twitter and follow the direct tweets and get involved yourself.

If the embedded code falls over at any point, then I'll go back to just updating this article. The applet below should auto-refresh, if it doesn't, refresh browser to see new entries.

Inter v The Tottenham

COYS

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Darren Bartholomew Bent

Loved it when he scored the opener against Man Utd and wheeled away in celebration tapping his badge, which was blatantly wired up to an iPhone allowing him to Morse code a Tweet about his sassy clinical finish. The man is on fire.

No first touch. Can't drop deep. Has to have a big lump foil as a partner up front. Always scores against the 'big teams'. And if he's the main striker - he won't stop scoring full stop. Textbook confidence player? One-dimensional? Yes. But the stats do not lie. Play him and play him to his strengths.

Average footballer, great goal scorer. All he needs is a team that breaks at speed, counters and plays the ball in front of him into space to run into. Substance over style. Be done with all this Harry Redknapp possession football!

We should have built our team around him.

Discuss.

Bent is soz for his tweets

Everybody has covered the Darren Bent statement that’s been published on the official Spurs website confirming it was his account...and his mistake. Now if you’ve been following Darren’s Tweets, the first thing that will be obvious is that it’s highly unlikely he wrote the apology all by himself, if at all. We all know it’s always a representative of the club or the agent that does the written work. Obviously, because it’s all a PR exercise in making sure the club come out of it as the victim and the player the naive impatient fool. Which is exactly what’s happened. And it was always going to happen. You can’t slate the chairman in the papers, so slating him online via a social networking tool is equally a no-no. Still, I can’t help but smile at the apology.

This is it:

I appreciate that transfers are seldom straightforward and are often complex. However, after a long period of waiting following my withdrawal from the plane to China, I had become incredibly frustrated by the time these things take and I posted inappropriate comments on my Twitter site.

I allowed my emotions to get in the way of my better judgement. I regret my actions and did not intend to offend Daniel Levy or anyone with the nature or the content of my posting.

If Darren’s Twitter account was still active he could have micro-blogged his regret using a string of 140 maximum character sentences. But then if it was completely up to him he wouldn’t be issuing an apology full stop.

Let’s put it into perspective. He’s (for the sake of argument) on 50K per week. I wouldn’t mind the waiting around a little bit longer knowing that my employer over-spent to sign me and don’t want to (as best as possible) be short-changed when selling me inorder to make up for the mistake in the first place. Telling the world that you're upset by posting in the public domain that is the internet is a no-go. Unless you wanted people outside of your private Twitter account (which anyone could access because you accepted anyone who requested access). Or you simply didn't think. Which is a common trait, let's be honest, with most professional footballers.

Hang tough. You're leaving. It’s a given. It’s Spurs, you should know it’s never quick and easy.

It's a massive massive shame that Daniel Levy doesn’t have his own Twitter account, as I’m certain this would have been handled and sorted without all the unnecessary press coverage.

Darren Bent

If you become the first footballer to be fined over your tweets, you'll go up in my estimation big time.

Good luck at Sunderland lad. Sorry we couldn't accommodate you at the Lane. Never meant for each other. Never meant to be.