More scary stats

Thanks to Mudshark over at GG for this. Click here to see the thread and a whole bundle of disapproving numbers that will give you night terrors on top of all the nightmares.

• We haven't won a home league game since beating Portsmouth 2-0 on 22 March 2008 (0 wins in 8 at the Lane).

• We've only won one other game since then, 1-0 at Reading on 3 May 2008 (1 win in 15 home and away).

• We currently have a scoring shortfall of 1.28 goals/game relative to last season overall under Ramos.

• Players who were at the club last season are contributing roughly the same number of goals per game as they were last season (though slightly down on the equivalent figure for last season post-LCF).

• New acquisitions have so far contributed nothing to making up this shortfall.

• Goals against per game are slightly up on last season overall, but better than last season post-LCF.

• The sharp decline in form seems to have begun with the 4-1 reverse at home to Newcastle on 30 March 2008.

• Since beating Portsmouth in March, we have gained 9 points from a possible 45 (0.6 per game).

• This would translate to a total of 23 points over a 38-game season (if rounded up).

• January is a long way off.

Pre-match nerves

More pre-match stats from the beeb.

Winless Spurs, on the joint worst ever start to a league season in their history, pay their first visit to the Britannia Stadium for Stoke's 2,000th top-flight match.

Between them Stoke (Football League founder members) and Spurs (Premier League ever-presents) have lost 10 matches and won just one this season, dropping a collective 36 points.

This is Tottenham's 35th Premier League match under Juande Ramos. They have only won 10 in his tenure.

Tony Pulis selects a side for his 600th league match as a manager, and 100th league game since his return to Stoke in June 2006.

Spurs recorded their joint biggest away win in top-flight football when defeating Stoke 1-6 at the Victoria Ground on 15 September 1951.

Shitting a brick yet?

King out. Hutton starts at right-back. Bent upfront on his own. Pav (shockingly) on the bench.

4-5-1.

/shakes head

Last season

....after 7 games we scored 10 goals and conceded 12. This season we've notched up 4 goals and conceded 10.

Stoke, you have been put on notice.

This time last season

We were third from bottom, with 5 points. Just three points better than the position we are in now.

Last season we had Berbatov and Keane. This season we have neither.

This blog post is depressing.

Look on the brightside

Back in 1912/13 season (that's 96 years ago, and the same year the Titanic sank - in case you've forgotten since the last time it was mentioned) Spurs recorded their worst start to a season ever (apart from the present 2009 season).......but did not get relegated. And we finished above the Woolwich.

I think this calls for an open bus parade.

I love the BBC

These stats make for grim reading. Yes, more grim than last week, and the week before, and the week before that. Enjoy (don't be choking on your coco-pops).

Hull visit North London in search of a remarkable double over successive weekends. Last Saturday, the Yorkshire club in their first top-flight season, became only the second side ever to leave Arsenal's Emirates Stadium with all three points; now they set about the task of adding to Tottenham's misery and gaining their first back-to-back victories at the highest level.

If Hull can go to the Emirates and survive the onslaught of constant passing movements from the home team, and win 2-1, then what can they achieve at Spurs, were the ball just gets played sideways and then hoofed up the pitch? A lot.

Juande Ramos' side are the only club yet to record a Premier League victory this season; Phil Brown's newcomers are yet to lose on the road.

Something's gotta give, right? Erm, no. Spurs are likely to stay on the side of recent history and lose, with Hull storming to 12 points clear of us. That's 12 points behind Hull, potentially. Will the players finally admit to being in a relegation scrap? Nah, cause 'we're too good to go down' innit...

Spurs have made their worst start to a league season in 53 years; since gaining just one point from the first six outings of the 1955-56 top-flight season. The point came from a 2-2 draw away to Manchester United, and their first win in the seventh game was 3-1, home to North London rivals Arsenal on 10 September 1955.

Honestly, if they can't be arsed to restore some pride, end this dismal miserable run, and prove their worth - cometh Sunday - then drastic measures will be taken. By the board, no doubt. But also by me. Stay tuned.

If Spurs do not pick up maximum points, it will be the first time in 96 years that they have failed to win any of their first seven games of a league season. In the top-flight campaign of 1912-13, the Londoners took 13 games to register a first victory. They lost nine games and drew three of their opening 12, until they beat Newcastle 1-0 at home on 23 November 1912.

96 years. No-one can say we are not re-writing the record books, right? Can imagine the back pages of the tabloids already. Big white bold numerals, stating: 96. Scathing.

This is the first league meeting of Tottenham and Hull in 30 years; the Tigers have never won on Spurs' turf.

Until Sunday, of course.

Pompey v Spurs

I've pulled the following stats from the Beebs preview of today's away game at Pompey:

Negatives:

• This is Juande Ramos' 50th game in charge of Tottenham
• Spurs have made their worst start to a league season in 53 years; since gaining just one point from the first six outings of the 1955-56 top-flight season.
• Tottenham are the only club without a Premier League victory this season.
• Gained just two points out of 18 this season.
• On the longest current run in the Premier League of 12 matches without scoring more than a single goal in a game, since the 2-0 home win over Portsmouth on 22 March.
• Yet to take the lead in a Premier League game this season.
• Won 10 of 32 Premier League games under Juande Ramos.
• Won one of the last seven away league matches (at Reading).

Positives:

• Tottenham hold a seven-match unbeaten Premier League record against Portsmouth of six wins and one draw, including the double over them last season.

Grim. Defoe apparently wants a hattrick. The greedy git. With Pompey having been whipped in recent weeks, including that 6-0 lose at Eastlands, I'm sure 'all guns blazing' will be their mentality while we stand there with empty water pistols with no triggers.

Prediction? If Pompey play poorly then we might just snatch a point. Otherwise, home win. The odds on us actually putting in a solid performance? Don't bet on it. What's scary is Hull winning at Arsenal, and us facing them soon. Whatever happened to dead certs and no easy games?

We've become the dead cert.

Of course, Pompey do have about 6 ex-Spurs player in their squad, so they could well shut-down again. Which would be welcomed.

Start of the season curse

2006-7 p6 W1 D1 L4

2007-8 p6 W1 D1 L4

2008-9 p4 W0 D1 L3

If we defeat Wigan at the Lane on Sunday and then draw the next Prem game - it will be our best start in 3 seasons.

Crisis, what crisis? This is just normal sodding service.

Frazier Campbell

Has been given the number 23 shirt.

Genius PR there.

stat attack

• We have the joint highest stadium capacity at 99% (Manchester Utd and Arsenal being the other teams)

• We've hit the woodwork 15 times - more than any other team. Time for the Soccer AM crossbar challenge.

• 80 goals have been scored at White Hart Lane - more than any other club.

• And the one that sums up Ramos main problem that needs resolving.....33 points lost from a winning position. Thats more than any other club and equals the all time record shared Wimbledon and Chelsea. Shocking stuff.
  

Staggering

Spurs have won only two of 63 away league games against the "Big Four" during the Premier League era. In the past two seasons we've taken one point from a possible twenty-one available away to Utd, Arsenal, Liverpool and Chelsea.

Obviously all other clubs in the Prem probably have records as bad as ours at the grounds of the big four, considering Arsenal and Chelsea rarely lose at home. But other fans don't pretend they are level-pegging with the big four. Though to be fair, we only believed the gap was closing last season and the season before. Reality has a nasty sting to it.

An improvement on this 'record' is the way to gauge true progression.

Chelsea away up next. Am I asking too much?

Another point of view

• Since Levy took over at Spurs, the club has continually looked at the way successful European clubs are run.

• Jol has been linked to other jobs, including Holland.

• Many members of the media disagree with the DOF system and frankly do not understand it.

• Tottenham need to keep one step ahead and if that means tapping other managers - so be it.

• We had a bad start to the season. Two defeats.
  

• The media like there to be a 'club in crisis'.

• The board have told Jol to finish in the top four. And have given him £40m to assist him in his quest.

• Jol is our manager and if he does not hit the targets that the board has made then he will be replaced.
  

• In this he is not in a unique situation.

Rose-tinted glasses? Where can I get a pair?