Harry booze ban threat? Pull the other one, then just pull us a pint...

Booze ban at the Lane? Ledley King will be a popular lad at training. It's reminiscent to when Ramos banned ketchup and attempted to regulate the players diet with a strict regime. It all ended in tears.

I'm not sure how much of this 'banning booze' statement Harry has made is just PR fluff to soften the brutal blow received to the clubs public image or possibly even an indirect warning to the rest of the squad to behave themselves going forward. Let's face it, banning booze completely is unlikely. Moderate consumption will always be allowed. Can you really see players going out on a Saturday night and not drinking? Tom Huddlestone and Aaron Lennon are probably still recovering from the heart palpitations experienced when that very thought entered their minds.

If it is banned then we might reap the benefits on the pitch. Boozing every weekend can't help much, if that's all they ever do.

As for King, plenty of aftermath gossip about his arrest. Obvious exaggerations and bullshit interpretations of what happened on the night including some clichéd sound bites surrounding his stay in a police cell overnight (he cried, he stated he was rich, he slept…..shocking stuff). Once more, not defending King for acting the dick, but how many blatant kiss'n'tell money-grabbing attempts ('my face was bruised' - really? Do bruises vanish over night then?) do we have to listen to before this story disappears? Court case is in July, so I guess that answers my question.

"I play for Tottenham, you play for fat Gerard" - This has to be the quote of the whole incident, straight from the mouth of Ledders, that somehow equates to belittling Steven Gerrard (if you go with the tabloid assessment) when in fact it's a reference to Rafa resembling his predecessor (with an additional few pounds). I might have that completely wrong. Maybe he thought Gerard Houllier is still the gaffer at Anfield. That's some night out.

No wonder he doesn't train between games. He's probably refused admission into The Lodge.

Regardless, two points. Firstly, as drunk as Ledders was, well done that man for being able to clock a Liverpool supporter and attempt to shout him down with some football banter. Secondly, so drunk was King, he makes the assumption that someone with a Liverpool tattoo must therefore play for the club. Pure gold that.

Surely on £83,000 a week (allegedly) you could just stay in doors and bring the party to your home. I know I would.

Playstation 3. Dial-an-Escort-girl. Pizza.

Guaranteed fun. Guaranteed women. Food delivered to door.

The good life.

King: "Do you know who I am?"

Ledley King. If you had his knees you'd be drowning your sorrows every night. He has an unwanted habit of attracting this type of attention far too often, but I’m loving how the bouncer can't wait to get himself on tv to be interviewed about it.

We all know Ledley likes a drink. He’s been photographed four times since the Carling Cup final, falling out of nightclubs smashed out of his head, trousers down at his ankles. It’s a mess to look at. Whether it has something to do with the fact that he knows he probably doesn’t have that much time left in the game thanks to his dodgy knees is a distinct possibility and it makes for sad reading. More so because Ledley comes across as a shy quiet type of bloke, but I guess that’s rather irrelevant when you mix it up with alcohol.

Then again, he might just like a drink. Though a few years back, you never read about him getting into trouble outside night clubs.

It’s obviously not good news that he’s been arrested for ABH and any lesser player for the club would probably have the book thrown at him. In fact a lesser player, committing this type of offence on the back of other night club incidents would probably be in serious trouble.

As for the incident itself, even though King really has to sort himself out I’m inclined to believe it’s all been blown out of proportion just a little bit. ABH could simply constitute some pushing around. It’s not like blood was drawn. Not that I’m defending the act. But the doorman/bouncer doesn’t come across as a victim to me, sitting there with half a grin on his face being interviewed by Sky News. If King did make those racist remarks then it’s inexcusable. Was that not caught on someones mobile phone? And how does a bouncer allow a drunk to 'beat him up'?

Apparently he has a sore head.

Expect him to turn up in the tabloids being interviewed and paid plenty. Apparently he didn’t recognise King and had to be told who he was. I’m sure at that point he knew he had scored a blinder. I mean, for someone who has been ‘attacked’ he sure got himself in front of a tv camera quick enough.

As for King, if he did come out with the textbook classic ‘Do you know who I am?’ comment, then again shame on him.

Footballers, across the country, get smashed out of their heads every weekend. Much like most people who go out on the town. Doesn’t take much to get into a scuffle. Especially with a doorman. The trick is to retain some type of dignity and walk away or just not get yourself into that type of situation in the first place. But he is obviously in no fit state to know when to walk away when refused admission.

It’s ridiculous to have to chaperone him, but he obviously needs someone there who can control their drinking to make sure he doesn’t get himself kicked out of clubs or refused entry. He obviously doesn’t do half measures.

If Ledley wants to continue playing surely boozing it after a game is the last thing he should be doing. Stick your feet up and rest man. The club need to take some type of responsibility here. King also needs to accept there’s a problem.

Someone should have a word with him a while back, but somehow it’s looking more and more like Ledley is drowning his sorrows and the club are allowing him to do so because before you know it, he’ll have hang up his boots. He still has football in his life. He should be doing his best to keep it that way.

I know who you are Ledders. A top top player. With a horrid taste in nightclubs.

Lost in translation: Upson wants to be King?

Ledley gets selected for England. Harry has a fit. Fabio explains he wanted to see King for himself within the England set-up. King arrives. King leaves. Harry has another twitch aimed towards Fabio, who cites the Hutton injury issues to call Harry a hypocrite. Words still exchanged via exaggerated tabloid articles, including the possiblity of King perhaps being selected for England in the future. In what type of capacity, who knows.

It then all went quiet for about 20 seconds, and Matthew Upson decided that his opinion on the subject was so important, he shared it with us. Not Rio. Or Terry. But Upson. Here's the quote:

“The Ledley King situation is difficult as he is a fantastic player and everybody sees his performances. It is amazing how he can perform at that level without training.

But when you come here with England, there is a big emphasis on the training. We turn up on Monday and the training is intense, full-on. You have to recover in the afternoons because we do that all week. It would be difficult to excuse a player from training and then play him in the team. That would not fit in with the culture of the squad"

Hilarious. What culture of the squad is Upson refering to exactly? The one that sees us losing penalty shoot-outs or the one that sees players who shine for their club but fail to do so for their country when it really matters? King can handle himself just fine, whether it's rolling out of Faces nightclub or sticking Drogba in his pocket for 90 minutes - he can out perform most even if his knee is held together by blue-tac. Whether he trains or not is neither here or there. Except that it probably does mean playing for England is a broken dream. Yet, Upson still felt the need to railroad our Ledley via the red tops. Such is the concern of the young lad that he'll fall even further behind in the pecking order.

Culture of the squad, it appears, is to look after ones own agenda.

Ledley crowned King of England.....long live the King?

Tuesday afternoon round-up of the past weeks highlights.

Spiffing weekend with the win against Chelsea. Feet firmly back on the ground, right? I say that because even I got a little giddy with our victory. It amuses me that the tables have turned a little in our advantage. The little club from West London, with history you can trace back a couple of years, don't much fancy playing us. Suddenly we are flirting with the possibility of Europe, which appears to be winking in our direction and playfully lifting her skirt up, teasing us with her continental cheek. This has got some Spurs fans trembling at the knees with excitement. And this is the exact reason why other fans hate us. Far too emotional for our own good. A month or so back, relegation was still a word people shared in worried conversations, scared to ask where the next three points might come from. A week in football is a long time blah blah blah.

It's great that the players have finally settled and we are playing with confidence. And it's equally great that such is the non-event in the way of difference between a team just above the bottom three and one just below 7th spot in the table, that we can go from relegation fodder to potential Europa glory in the space of two games. No point on dwelling on what could have been had we picked up more points in the opening eight games (refer to Harry Redknapp for further analysis on this). I'm happy with anything above 10th. And if we did qualify for the soon to be revised version of the UEFA Cup, I don't believe it would be a distraction to getting it right in the Prem (which should be the overwhelming priority next season). Sure, we can kiss goodbye again to Saturday 3pm kick-offs, but considering how weak the opposition teams appear to be in the early rounds of the competition, we could use it to blood some youth players and reserves. Never say no to Europe. Time they gave the competition an extra twist. Winners qualify for the Champions League. Considering there are more runners-up and 3rd, 4th placed teams than actual champions, I don't see what harm it would. Apart from making the rich richer.

Still unbeaten against the Sky Sports Top 4 this season in the Prem. Only defeats (overall) coming in both Cups against Man Utd. Villa (who spent some time in 4th place) also beat us at the Lane. Strange old season. All that's left is for Robbie Keane to score a last minute winner in front of the Kop on the final day of the season, handing Man Utd the title. Can he play in that game? Someone mentioned how the FA will not allow it due to 'conflicting interest' (being the fact that he can pick up a winners medal due to appearance made for Liverpool, if the Reds win the league). Cant believe he would be interested in doing so considering his experience up there.

Aaron Lennon has signed an extension. I touched on this briefly in the match review for the Chelsea game. The fact he has signed on for a further two years and has stated he is happy at the club means exactly that, and there is no conceivable way for him to leave the club this summer, regardless of any possible £20M bids from Rafa or anyone else. From a business sense, it's obvious that the extension means if the player is sold then we can get more money for him. From a football perspective, he has extended his contract which means he does not want to leave the club. Which means that the club must laugh in the direction of anyone who comes knocking. There is no Robbie Keane or Michael Carrick reasoning on Aaron being sold this summer or the next. Memo to Levy. The door isn't just closed. It's double locked.

Same applies with Modric.

Congrats also to Aaron on his England call-up. Well deserved. Sparkling form, the type that makes him undroppable for Spurs. The more he develops the more unplayable he'll be for the opposition. Good news for us. Good news for the 3 Lions.

Talking of business sense, we've announced record figures for the six months ending on the 31st December 2008 (so that doesn't include the outgoings in the Jan transfer window). Levy via the official site:

"In a period of global economic recession this is a considerable achievement and we acknowledge that both the strength of our business and the fantastic loyalty shown by our supporters have helped ensure that these results have not been materially affected. We have benefited from having a robust business that is well financed and has continued to be able to support investment in the first team."

Yes, all very good. Well done. But this doesn't exactly turn me on. It's grand that in these days of debt-ridden football clubs we are in very healthy nick. We'd be even richer if we didn't spunk our money on players with inflated transfer values. So arguably, as strong as we are off it, we haven't been equally strong on it. But that has more to do with the people employed by Levy than it has to do with him directly, although he is still responsible. I'm not attempting to dig for the sake of it, but considering how much the club charges for tickets, it's no bleeding surprise we're so strong financially. We have a loyal fan base and regardless of the recession the country is going through, we don't appear to be turning our backs on the club as fans. So as long as the new stadium plans push ahead and we double our capacity, we'll be even richer. Which means even more money to spend (waste) on players we don't need. I guess my point is, when you are running a club like Spurs there is no excuse for running it into the ground.

What Scholar did was criminal, and what happened at Leeds, laughable. My criticism of Levy has always been the way he appears to confuse business decisions with ones of a footballing nature. Decent figures for sure, that won't look as bright when you subtract the transfer deals and the money spent on other ventures that will benefit the club in the long run (i.e the training ground facility). Merchandising is also down (I guess the irony in buying a Spurs mug is too much for some in the current climate) leaving Sky TV revenue and season ticket sales the only constant any club can rely on.

Consistenty ON the pitch is now required, so all the smart accountancy can support the only real progression fans care about.

Nice to see Adel and Gio doing well at their respective clubs (on loan) in the Championship. Adel, notching a winning goal for QPR over the weekend, is getting rave reviews for his quick feet and clever play. Has to be part of our squad for next season. Gio is also a player that the club should hold onto. If anything because getting rid of him before he has had the chance to prove himself at Spurs in the Prem is harsh. But when you compare Adel's comments about wanting to return to Spurs to prove himself to Gio's who is far more ambiguous in where his future lies - you wonder if a decision has already been made on the latters future.

Hutton is on the way back. Looked good in his warm-up, which took place outside a pub with his dad.

King for England? Harry is furious. I can understand why. On paper you'd have to be concerned as a Spurs fan if King plays a part for England on the pitch. It would probably mean he can't play for Spurs the following week. Not sure what Capello wants out of this. If he took King to a major tournament, would he be there to cover? And if he did, it would still be a case of waiting for his knee to lose the swelling. Maybe I'm biased, but why Woodgate isn't in the squad as an alternative to Terry and Ferdinand is a complete mystery to me. As for King, if it wasn't for his dodgy knee he'd be number one choice. Brilliant player who deserves an international career, but will never have one of any real substance. Personally, I think having him part of the England squad is nice recognition to what he has achieved as a player who has 'retired' from full training. But if there is a chance he will play, Ledders will have to consider the risks. Spurs has to be his priority. Being his bread and butter. Which is probably the reason Harry is a little pissed off.

But alas, it's over before it's began and King is back at Spurs to continue his 'individual training programme'. So he won't be taking part in the friendly on Saturday. And will probably never be called up again. What England's medical staff and Fabio thought they could do with the lad is anyones guess considering how well known his problems with fitness are.

England can live without him. We can't.

Ledley will always be our King

I'm a bit bored at the moment. There's a slight lull in stories worthy of commentary. Other than maybe the news that Ledley King could play in the remaining 10 fixtures for Spurs. According to our oracle of football, Harry Redknapp. This following on from the recent lack of contract talks that won't be taking place just yet between club and player.

King (with Spurs no longer having midweek games to concern themselves with) can now look forward to Ledders being available once per week with plenty of recovery time in-between. As long as the old knee doesn't give way. Is he prolonging the inevitable? Is he sustaining long term permanent damage to his knees every time he plays for us? How long will he persist with this? Equally important to ask whether Spurs will have to make a decision on King's future based on his availability. You can't build a defence around a part-time player. But when the player is this good, do you allow for a concession? Heart says yes. So does the head, but more so the heart.

As for the potential of a new contract, that really depends on whether this is it for the rest of his career. This being 'play when injected with magic' but only half the time and never twice in a week. It's sad. A fully fit Ledley King would be a fully fledged England international. And probably a Man Utd player. But theres no doubt he'd be a defender at the top of his game with countless clubs courting him - in a world with no knee trouble. He's still capable of exceptional performances for us - but still in a part-time capacity. Which is why we are probably not reading a Daniel Levy club announcement justifying a £25M transfer of King to Old Trafford.

What we have instead is a loyal committed servant who gets wrapped up in cotton wool more often than running out in Lilywhite. As long as he is not aggravating his knee problems with the injections and continuing to play professional football then I'm happy to have him at the club and the club should make sure he remains there till he hangs his boots up. I hope there is not a single ounce of truth that doctors advised him to quit or risk serious damage.

Also, I'm not suggesting Ledley is still with us only because of his injury plight. The bloke is no Sol Campbell. Ledley is honest and loves the club. He wants to be at White Hart Lane and in the past possibly could have flirted with a Champions League club if he wanted to. But if he was 110%, he'd be tested, along with the chairman. That's a sure thing. But he'd never walk the way Judas did. Personally hope he does start the big big away games we have at Villa, Everton, Man Utd and Liverpool. Dawson is a fine understudy to have on current form. I'm still staggered by the fact that King never trains.

Elsewhere, there was a perfect example of printed bullshit in the Sunday papers that had David Bentley linked with a move to Aston Villa. He would 'relish the move' apparently. No actual quote or suggestion that any part of the article was based on fact or actual player/club opinion. The usual standard of reporting from the weekend tabloids.

Bentley has been nothing short of disastrous since signing for us. No form at all. Not even 5% of what he showed at Blackburn. He has struggled monumentally to fit in and perform consistently. Yes, he is over-rated. He isn't the next David Beckham. He obviously believes he is far better than he is and therefore attempts to play like he's word class from distorted memories and what he thinks people expect to see of a superstar rather than just play a simple and productive game. Such is the power of confidence (and the decimation of it) that he can't even achieve the basics that came easy to him prior to his move.

As much maligned as he is and regardless of whether he is or isn't worth £15M or so, he does have ability and he can do a job for us. Personal problems aside, he has to stop feeling sorry for himself. The groans and frustrations from home fans will be replaced with cheers and applause the moment he gets stuck in and doesn't try so damn hard to be something he is not.

Bentley is a good player. Not a great one. It's not lost on us that he 'loves the club' (he does, he said so) and wants to be successful at Spurs. He seems genuine enough, but it's inconsequential to what's produced on the pitch if his head is in the clouds. If he wants to succeed he has to believe it.

One bright thing the arrival of Bentley has achieved is the resurgence of Lennon's form. Having both players on top form would mean competitiveness within the squad, inspiring players to excel. Something we've lacked in abundance so often in the past. Not that Aaron needs to look over his shoulders at the moment.

Bent can't Bale us out

Spurs 1 Pompey 1

It’s going to the wire.

We now sit in 16th, on 21 points – along with five other clubs. Zany. Three points from 12th and six points from 9th. Welcome to the Premier League where the bottom 12 clubs are basically rubbish. The 5 teams above the 12 are only there because of a decent run of form. The way this season is going, don’t be surprised if the table from 8th down to 20th looks completely different a month from now.

Part of me is happy that we created more chances today in 90 minutes than we have in the previous 270. Granted, half of them were Lennon scoffed shots, but there was some positivity in our play. It’s still all rather ominous though. We don’t look like a team with any belief or urgency from the offset. We sort of fall into a position of confidence after we snatch an equaliser. How about starting the game with the pretence we are already a goal down? Arguably, we are with Bale in the side.

Ok, cheap shot. I apologise. But how gutted and depressed must he feel to see us score moments after being subbed? Regardless of the voodoo, I think it’s unfair to be too harsh on the team today. They gave it a go. 15 shots on target, 11 off. James saved wonderfully from Defoe and Lennon (on one occasion when he actually put some direction and power behind the ball). Bent's miss will haunt me all the up to the next Prem game. Serves me right for laughing at Zaki’s embarrassment yesterday when he also missed an open goal when it was seemingly impossible to do so.

The fact we created so much but didn’t punish a Pompey side who weren’t too shy of goal either, highlights the desperate need for Redknapp to sign a player who will partner Defoe to (near enough) perfection.

Pav, as much as I want him to do well, isn’t the right player for the current predicament. He still looks a little lost, and although I prefer not to believe that his interpreter runs up and down the sidelines during training, translating phrases like ‘flick it on’ and ‘run into space’, I think he will benefit a team that’s balanced and winning. I suddenly see the appeal of Jones (Sunderland), although the asking price is ridiculous. Is he as accomplished a top flight goal scorer as let’s say, Darren Bent was, before we signed him? No. And look at how average that particular £15M turned out to be. The goals scored by Bent at Charlton, a team who worked hard on the counter, was never really suited for Spurs. You don't buy a particular style of player before you need him. We bought him when we already had 3 top class players. He was bought on the back of the goals scored and the hype surrounding him. No margin of error this time round. When I said near enough to perfection, I meant it. Defoe needs the perfect foil (or vice-versa).

If Villa bid £8M for bent, then we should add a bit of salt and pepper, a dollop of ketchup, and then bite their appetising hand off. Our Russian lad should play from the bench and spend the rest of the season working hard to settle in England and learn the language. As much as we cry out for a quality DM, we are just as desperate for a quality striker.

Add to that a centre-back. King went off injured. His replacement, Dawson, was very good in his place. But we need to start looking hard at bringing someone to partner Woodgate on a more permanent basis. King, we love him, but the team as a whole is more important than one individual player. The defence has to be strong and his cameos are not enough for us to be able to drive through some consistency at the back.

Back to Bale. Remember why we signed him? He’s a talent. Fantastic going forward, not brilliant defensively, but a wonderful young player. He has not lost those abilities. He is simply a wonderful player that is in rotten rotten form. When you miss Ekotto at left-back, then you know things are bad. Gareth's confidence is shot to pieces, and our much publicised lack of depth is apparent here when we have to select a player that is struggling. I hope Spurs keep the faith in the long run with Bale. We have a habit of buying young players with tons of potential for massive fees (we basically pay what the player would be worth if he turned out to be good four years from now) and then sell them if they don’t have a great start. Kaboul anyone? £8M for that gem.

So back to the game. We need to be winning these home matches. I know we missed out on the giddy heights of 12th spot, but it’s not relevant thanks to everyone practically being equal down at the bottom. The Prem won’t begin to shape up down there for another 5 or games. Might even take more. Not worth the risk in waiting and re-evaluating week to week. We need to start collating the points with that much needed urgency.

Winning today would also mean nothing if we don’t beat Stoke in our next match. It seems we are forced into re-evaluating the mathematics from week to week. That luxury will soon be gone as we move closer to game 38. Don't know about you, but going to Liverpool needing to win to stay-up on the final day of the season isn't something that I want to experience. Even if they had a dodgy lasagne, I still wouldn't fancy our chances.

By the end of Jan, we’ll hopefully have several new recruits. You would hope we'd be a far more stronger outfit come Feb, and we'd need to be to beat the top table sides (as we can't appear to beat anyone below mid-table). Points have to start rolling in.

Imagine having Berba and Keane upfront today. How many do you reckon we would have scored based on chances created? Add to it the creativity and space created by a winning partnership as our two departed players shared, and we’d be laughing. Throw in a DM and if you want to be cheeky, a left-winger and the doom and gloom will be non-existent.

What we got instead was a little bit of the old anti-luck (that Bent miss and an early Defoe chance which should have been on target). Good luck is something you get when you will yourself forwards, it smiles on you not when you are down in the dumps but when you strive to get to a higher place. Far too many of our players are feeling sorry for themselves.

Lennon played well, and is arguably our best player this season. He’s even learnt to plant a cross on a forwards head. O’Hara was busy, but is always prone to one error, which can usually lead to disaster. He got away with it today. Modric, oh Modric. I really do hope Appiah is signed by us (as I doubt Palacios is going to bother with City throwing money his way) because Luka needs a strong centre-pairing to allow him the freedom to create. He played well second half, but his back-turning moment to a tackle which saw David Nugent almost (should have) scored is not the type of thing you want to see in a dogfight. Zokora was Zokora. His first touch is Sutcliffesque, and his another player who struggles with the simple things.

Bentley wasn’t too shabby when he came on. Apart from one or two set-pieces. He created that chance for Bent. Would have been a perfect assist that. He definitely has the look of a player feeling sorry for himself. But his performance was encouraging.

Defoe took his goal very well (glad to have him back), through the legs of Sol Campbell. Nice touch. And how refreshing was it not to spend the whole game singing silly songs about this ex-player? Although when the Park Lane hummed the controversial re-worked Lord of the Dance song, I even saw a copper smile.

Altogether now.....

Sol Sol
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la

Overall, decent game, decent performance – and on another day, we could have won it (but on the flip side, Pompey could have scored one or two more themselves....and Nugent scored, so that sums that up). David James played his part, as he usually does when he faces us.

Stoke at home MUST BE, HAS TO BE three points for us. Much like today was, but the Prem, as I said, allows for this re-evaluation. For now.

Redknapp did well today considering the players who got injured (Pav shouldn’t be out for too long, but King is ‘long term'). And Gomes, Corluka and Lennon all played on with slight knocks. Harry could only make the one tactical substitution today.

Bit more application required, urgency too and whoever we bring in should see to it. I hope. It’s a broken record, but formations and tactics will work better if the right players are in the right positions.

It’s crazy that around 9 months ago, White Hart Lane was the goal-scoring capital of the world. Blink, and you’d miss one. 4-4’s all the range, yet today, although defensively we have one of the best records at home, offensively it’s the worst in all of the leagues.

Obviously, we need to be running around a lot more and sticking it in the net.

With and without

Stat of the year right here for you.

When King plays for Spurs our chances of winning increase massively. In the past four seasons we've won at least 50% of all the Prem League games he has featured in. This season our average is 0.89 condeded compared to 1.86 when he's missing. We havent won in the league without him.

Break down of the figures over the past few seasons:

2008/09 - 56% with King / 0% without King
2007/08 - 50% with King / 26% withouth King
2006/07 - 52% with King / 35% without King
2005/06 - 50% with King / 42% withouth King

Damn that dodgy knee.

Challenge Spurs™ - Long live the King

Challenge Spurs™ Series

Game 08 v (A) West Ham United
2-0 win, 3 points
Total points: 18
Position: 15th

Julian Dicks, Tony Cottee, Billy Bonds, Frank Lampard Senior, Danny Dyer, Russell Brand, Ray Winstone, The Krays, Phil and Grant, Jellied Eels, Burberry, Lego castles, Knees up mother brown, Dick van Dyke, Nigel Winterburn, Scott Parker, Green Street, lasagne, Carlito Tevez, The Academy of Football, Frodo Baggins....can you hear me Frodo Baggins? Your boys took one hell of a beating! Your boys took one hell of a beating!

*Cough*

Not the greatest London Derby ever. Ranks somewhere between average and ordinary. But a win is a win is a win, right? New improved Spurs can lose a game, and then follow it up with an away win. Something all too difficult for so many transitional Lilywhite sides in the past 10 years. Not that this is the dawn of a new age or anything spectacular. Living simply in the present, survival (dramatic word right there) is still paramount. We know, and so does everyone else, that we will not get relegated because there are other teams with next to little hope of getting out of their current predicaments. Harry Redknapp is no longer available. But glad to see the likes of Woodgate still refer to a 'relegation battle'.

That type of self-awareness and respect for our current situation helps satisfy any questions about the mentality of the squad. They know its far from done and dusted and that type of attitude will see us fine. Christ knows what the attitude was when Ramos was in charge, although the blame could be split 50/50 with the players. Juande was today appointed the new Madrid boss (for anyone who has not been paying attention). Sideways step there for the Special Juan.

Nothing sideways about Spurs at Upton Park. At least by the end of the game there wasn't. Pretty non-descript first half. West Ham pretty in possession but fuck all else. Zola attempting to get his players to play Italian style. Someone needs a word in his ear that you need quality players to get away with that type of football.

Spurs with the better chances (Pav hitting the post being the closest we got). Second half, we were resolute and determined. And simply better in every way in comparison to the little team from Green Street. Aaron 'I really do have some end product' Lennon crossing for Ledley 'my knee is knackered but I'm still better than most' King who duly headed the ball downwards into the ground and over the despairing reach of Rob Green. The second goal came from a counter after Gomes brilliantly saved twice (first save was good, second was actually down to the ball being struck straight at him by DiMichele, but let's just reveal in the moment) and off down the other end of the pitch we went where O'Hara hit a sweet shot giving Green no chance for the second time in the game.

Average, ordinary game? Yes. Only one team ever likely to win it? Yes. Harry keeps up his 100% winning record when returning to West Ham. And we move up to 15th, above West Ham, who have spent the best part of this season laughing at our plight. That irony is a right bastard. Proper in-your-face c*nt.

Why so serious?

General observations from the game:

Pav. Played upfront on his own, didn't hold up the ball that well but you could argue that hoofing the ball to him isn't the cleverest of things tactically. He's a bit slow which became more than apparent when the pacey Bent came on. Much better suited in a 4-4-2 where he is more likely to cause a bit of havoc 'running around' alongside Darren.

Lennon and Corluka owning their side of the pitch. Some decent flank play from the pair of them. Lennon beginning to prove he ain't no one trick bling pony. And Corluka proving he was a very astute buy. Who bought him again? *blush*. Defence played very well and dealt with everything that Cole and Bellamy throw at them. Although I could deal with those two myself. Bellamy looks shot to pieces. Cole is all heart no skill.

When West Ham did manage to get a shot on target, reborn of confidence, Gomes, smiled and collected the ball. Comfortable. Talking of 'shot to pieces', Bentley is...shot to pieces. Here is a player who fancies himself a bit. There's nothing wrong in that. Beckham, in a very understated way, fancied himself. Ronaldo, in the most obvious way, fancies the fuck out of himself. But both have a right to because they are great players. Bentley is at best a very good player, but not the most consistent and definitely nowhere near being great. So what we have is a £16M player who is trying to play from memory of how a great player should be playing. Harry needs a blatant word in his ear. I'd personally slap him across the face and shave his head. He needs to start bringing it and starting with the basics (simple passing, set pieces that deliver) will do just fine for us.

West Ham's new academy players did little to impress

As for Jenas. The enigma is just that. Did he play well? Did he play ok? Did he play poorly? What does he do? What does he bring to the team? I don't know anymore. No matter what, if fit, he seems to play. Do we miss something the manager(s) sees? Much like Carrick, Jenas has qualities that some of us fail to appreciate from the stands. The donkey work and unsexy running around. And the qualities he does have (bursting from midfield, box-to-box energy) is not always on show. He goes missing. Sometimes he shows up. Sometimes he tackles. Sometimes he's invisible. Nobody has come close to taking this young man and instilling arrogant confidence and awareness in his abilities.

Redknapp has a lot of work to sort out both Jermaine and David. The luxury of another £16M Comolli signing to dull over the pain will not be forthcoming.Talking of Comolli signings...Zokora. Shocking, utterly shocking. He played reasonably well. Even gave us one of his trademark runs and shots, this time hitting the shot on target.Yeah, I know, it happened because I saw it and there were cameras there and it was on tv, so screw you if you think I'm making this up. I'll keep you posted on any random drug tests that may have been conducted after the game. Because seriously, bizarro world or what? His pace is staggering at times and if its somehow possible to improve his decisio making a little, his performances may even continue to improve. Smile on his face, heart on sleeve, Didier is enjoying his football and has a willingness that others have (and some still) lack. But before you get a tattoo of his face on your back, let's remember that his passing ability is poor and is one-footed.

Carlton...Cole....I can't look away.....help me...

And then we have Modric. I predicted we would win if he played. Minute or so in, and he should have scored. Bit rusty, didn't strike his shot with any venom or placement. Tame effort at the keeper. But no problem. He was different class to anyone out on the pitch (yes, we know that's probably not saying much). Luka is a quality player who has taken a while to adjust to life in the Prem, which was always going to be the case. He's poor form in the early part of the season was mainly due to the disaster of a start we had. Now the team is winning games (9 out of 12) and he has some protection and team-mates who work as a cohesive unit, he is free to roam and playmake. He has yet to score for us, but his vision, touch and movement is just as important. Without him, we can't keep hold of the ball. With him? Possessions nine tenths of the law. He is our new Berbatov. Smaller, no floppy hair and moody face. No goals, but enough creative spark to see us have a possible 'world class' player to fill the void left by the Bulgarian. Give him another 3-4 months and with Pav hopefully settled to London life - we'll have more than enough to smile about.

King was his majestic self. Cameo performances seem to be what we are limited to nowadays. Harry after the game spoke about how Ledders is a great lad and its shame about his knee. It was a little bit of a downer. Almost felt like Harry was telling us that Ledley will never recover from his knee problems so over time (another season or two?) he might play fewer and fewer games and retirement will be the only option. Where do you find another King from? Uncertain about his availability for Saturday. Fingers crossed.

As for our opponents. Toothless. Lacked any passion, much like the atmosphere in parts. For all their hype about how important this game is for their fans ("Everyone in the dressing room is now raring to go against Tottenham on Monday night. It is the biggest match of the season for our fans and we all know what it means for us to get a result over our London rivals. We will be going all out to try and achieve that" - Lucas Neill) they hardly showed any of that spirit in the 90 minutes that matter the most. Their midfield was poor. One win in ten? Oh well. Being below us is their rightful place, no? That way when they do go above us, they can pop the champers again and celebrate like its 1999.

West Ham's norty mob, in their manner

If any Spurs fan wants to mass-email the league table along with a quote or three from any number of messages received about 4 weeks back - including photos of road signs and jokes about triangles, please feel free to do so. It's a give and take world we live in. So make sure you fucking well give it.

Challenge Spurs™ - Stats Update

8 Played.
5 wins.
1 draw.
2 defeats.

16 points.

4 games left in the Challenge Spurs™ Dirty Dozen series. When I started this, the challenge was as follows:

• 30 points minimum by January 1st
• 12 games
• 6 at home
• 6 away
• 36 possible points

If we win the final four games, we'll have 28 points in total from these 12 games, plus the two points we started with, giving us 30 points. At the time, based on our position and what was happening around us, it was very much a do or die (where have I heard that before?) conundrum. 30 points from 36 is European-challenging form, so it was a huge ask. If we write off Saturdays game against Utd, and say we win the final 3 games, that will give us 25 points from the series, and a total of 27. And with the table the way it is, that should see us with plenty of breathing space (not mathematically impossible to get dragged back into it, but far more of a comfort zone for us).

For now, tilt the head ever so slight upwards to stop the nosebleed.

Ledley King

Doesn't play much, innit? If he plays on Thursday in the UEFA Cup and is rested on Sunday, then Ramos is still dizzy from counting the money we've given him, which explains his inept team selection and tactics.

For clarity:

Priority - Premiership survival
Everything else - Irrelevant

Rotation, rotation, rotation...

So Ramos is defending his rotation policy, which currently involved changing the team around practically every game. If you were not worried about the Hull game, then take this into account:

"I cannot understand why I am always being asked about this. We are playing in three competitions - the league, the Carling Cup and the Uefa Cup - and it is necessary to change some players.

"It is impossible to play the same team in every game.

"Now we have a game against Hull in just three days and I will have to make some changes again. Ledley King will need a rest and I may also have to leave out Jonathan Woodgate as well.

"The Premier League is different and we need to improve on where we are in the table, but I hope for the best against Hull at White Hart Lane. I want the best performance from the team.

"Little by little, match to match, we need to improve."

Riiiight. Woodgate and King 'rested' for Sunday? King, on form, should just be dropped. He looks Dawsonesque at the moment. Time to retire the Rolls Royce? We can't go on like this, and Ledley probably knows he can't either.

As for rotation, you can do so, but play the strongest line-up for the games that matter the most: The Premiership. The team has to stay settled, otherwise this 'little by little' improvement we seek will not happen. We haven't improved, at all in recent weeks. And none of this inspires confidence.

Can only hope this is just some pre-match propaganda - and both play.

King Op

It's not unexpected really, is it? King set to miss the start of the season (probably along with Lennon). No confirmed centre-back signing as yet to cover his absence. Rocha, is at best, cover - but we need the type of cover that might need to sit in defence for the best part of the season. Ledley, in recent years, has had far too many prolonged periods out injured. Its far too much of a big risk not to bring in a 'world class' defender. Needed, regardless for added depth. Maybe the Ginger Pele is available on a free?

The surgery on Ledders left knee takes place next week. Its routine (according to the club) so we are not meant to worry too much. Yeah, right. We are Spurs fans ffs. Worrying is what we do.