When does it kick off?

Has the football season started? I know it has but it obviously hasn't because I'm emotionally numb and I'm neither euphoric or disillusioned. Although the latter is a perfect fit for many who still strongly believe our summer transfer window activity has gone belly-up, with no saviour or messiah of the green fields to break the clouds apart with a rainbow.

I haven't even watched either edition of Match of the Day yet, although from the sounds of it I've only missed Alan Hansen salivating over a single passage of Liverpool play that is apparently ample evidence of their return to past glories. I did watch Real v Barca which was stupendous fun and also caught the second half of the City v Swansea game including the début of the completely unknown to these shores, Sergio Agüero, who scored a brace and assisted too. A star is born indeed, confirmed by Alan Smith because players don't exist until after they've appeared on a Super Sunday or MNF.

Talking of commentators, why is it they always sound so slutty for the football they're watching? It's like a porn actress who prefers not to wipe away the mess on her face, preferring instead to glisten for the camera all proud and gleeful when the reality is altogether far less attractive no matter how much she smiles and winks.

As for Kun. Blatantly blagging it against Championship opposition. Will fade by Christmas. Won't score as many as Adebayor either.

Talking of which, I'm still certain we'll sign a forward. I'm still banging the drum of delight whilst others bang the drum of despondency and dejection. I can not see this window closing without an arrival or two because such a scenario would be wholly unacceptable and yadda yadda yadda you've heard it all summer long. Faith is sitting next to me. Okay so he's a little sleepy and I keep having to nudge him because the snoring is repugnant but hey, at least his heart is beating. Sort of. Almost. Faintly.

Robbie Keane is gone. To the MLS. Tongue in cheek 'my dream' soundbite from Keano as he becomes a LA Galaxy player. I guess how much you rate (love) the player is all very much dependent on whether you believe his move to Liverpool tainted him so harshly that his first spell at Spurs is no longer one you can look back at with joy.

If that's you, then remind yourself of the following:

301 apps
122 goals

9th highest goal scorer in our history and one of only 16 players to have joined the THFC 100+ goal club.

I'm going to talk about Robbie on the next The Fighting Cock podcast, so I'll leave the particulars until then. But no argument that he very much did taint himself with the move to Liverpool. He left us for them, of course we're going to look on with disappointment. Perhaps that question in his head pushed him towards Anfield in a quest to see if he could step it up a further level away from his comfort zone only to find that it wasn't the answer he was hoping for. But to ignore his record prior to his move? Stupid. The only unforgivable is being subjected to that cartwheel celebration for so long before he retired it.

He might not have been the greatest but he consistently did a job for us and his stats prove that. His body has given up on him, possibly in addition, has also lost most of his swagger and confidence too. Good luck in the States. If you can't score any goals there Robbie, you could always return to Scotland.

Elsewhere. Arsenal finally allow Cesc to go home. £35M? Cheap, no matter how you look at it. Even if the player has retained a high level of performance, some claim he has somewhat stagnated. That's if you believe a player can be very good but not improve in leaps and bounds and still be awarded with the stagnated label. Warranted or otherwise, not sure it's time to RIP our North London neighbours but they seem to be losing players with each passing week. Hardly feel sorry for them but you have to laugh out loud when you see Fabregas kiss the badge on his new Barca shirt. Half expecting Luka to score an own goal at Old Trafford then rip his shirt off to reveal a Chelsea tattoo on his chest stating 'I'M A SLAVE, PLEASE LET ME JOIN MY DESTINY, I AM A CHELSEA BLUE, 4EVER'. It's a a big tattoo. Hey, maybe Arsenal will bid for Luka.

What? What did I say? Don't shoot the messenger, k?

So Hearts this week. Channel 5 ITV 4. I'm hoping for a strong spine and a comfortable win. Get through the qualifier then perhaps blood some kids. Don't care how weak Scottish football is, but would rather avoid a Young Boys type mishap in the first leg. If anything because it would mean us having to hold onto Crouch just to make sure we get through the second leg.

Man Utd away, our opening game of the season next Monday. I predict an open game. Score draw. No keeper gaffs from our boy please. Be rude to distract attention away from De Gea.

Limbo still has made prisoner. Feels like an eternity. Not long now before I escape.

COYS.

Love the shirt.

-

The Fighting Cock is a brand new THFC podcast. You can stream it or download it here on DML (make sure you have a Quicktime plug-in installed).

Love the Shirt.

Flav, tehTrunk, Spooky, Ricky, Chicago Dan.

The FC Podcast group on Facebook.

Also listen to The Fighting Cock via:

iTunes
rss feed
soundcloud

e-mail: thefightingcock at gmail dot com - we want your feedback, suggestions and e-mails.

The NDP is not viable but we can afford to splash out £40M on a player?

Ooooookay then.

Plenty of chin scratching this late evening.

Guillem Balague, think of him as the La Liga King of the ITK's has tweeted that...well, you know by now because you'll have read it and seen it on SSN and all the newsfeeds etc. We've bid for Sergio Aguero - £38.5M supposedly, and seen it rejected by Atletico Madrid. This following the early rumour(s) that we also bid (rejected) for Negredo, Llorente and Rossi.

Busy day of faxing for Mr Chairman. Not quite cool, calm and collected. Somewhere, there's a scouting system waiting to be rediscovered and effectively used to target player outside of window and then bid for said player 20+ days before actual transfer deadline day.

Crazy talk.

           Ballague "Spurs are running around Spain with a large bag of cash" - lol

On so many levels this is completely loopy. A day to go - what type of negotiation are you going to get out of the Spanish clubs at this late late stage? Considering there's complexities relating to tax (read this for a better understanding) and the fact that this particular player was wanted by Real Madrid earlier in the week (although all that says is that his club don't want to sell him to their 'rivals'). But they've already knocked back Chelsea.

I know leaving it to the last minute is sometimes done on purpose and I spoke about the dynamics of the wheeling and dealing the other day, but this all seems like much ado about nothing in terms of viable targets.

One thing that isn't relevant is the get out clause, as stated by Sid Lowe who firmly believes there is no chance of Aguero signing for us because; 'Legally speaking, Aguero's buy-out clause is irrelevant when it comes to a bid from Spurs' - basically what he's saying is, the get out clause is only for Spanish clubs but what Sid probably meant is the player will have no interest in the move.

Also does nobody want to cite City and the fact they pay some of their players twice the cost of their wages to cover the 50% tax the poor little sods have to fork out for plying their trade in England? Would love to know what type of package we would offer him.

"Here ya go Kun, 70k per week and free membership to Faces"

A suggestion perhaps that these more flamboyant 'look at us, look at us' bids will lead to possible second tier signings (in terms of cost) like Fabiano or Forlan (who are hardly second tier players). It's all a bit OTT. In fact, telling everyone you've got almost £40M to spend is hardly going to help if we have to revisit the proposed 'old men' of Fab and Diego. I know the story with both is that it's a no-go, but we all know it's never a no-go in football when a club says 'we ain't selling'.

Also, very few words on the fact that Aguero plays off Forlan and we already have a player to play off a forward (vdV) - we just don't have a forward of deep quality to match the intelligence and movement and guile of the Dutchman.

Something is not right with any of it. Mostly the way Sky Sports are all over this, in what has been a less than frantic/exciting window. Keane to West Ham is not going to be responsible for Jim White's head exploding. One day before the deadline and we're bidding for the best forwards in La Liga offering ridiculous money when there is about a 2% chance of having any of the bids accepted.

I smell a Levyism. Good on him if he's completley serious about it all. Rock'n'roll. But this will probably die quicker than fat Elvis on the toilet.

As for the title of this thread...yeah yeah, speculate to accumulate, said that plenty of times. I'm only trying to point out the absurdity of it all. If we signed a player of world class quality for a staggering amount of money and we finished top4/3 - it's money we'll make back and the gamble will pay off. On the other hand...I don't know, we sell Bale in the summer to compensate.

j/k

And anyways, the crux here is the timing and the almost demented manner of bidding for anyone who can kick a football.

If...if...any of this is true of course. You know, because Harry said we're not signing anyone.

Cough.

In addition, in case you're wondering, here's my three-word Fulham match report: What a clusterf***.

It's been a poor week, what with Huddlestone breaking down and having his return delayed, Kaboul requiring an op (out for up to 6 weeks) and the Keystone Cops turning out in Lilywhite (edit: I meant that poxy cursed light blue). Only bright spot was the support at Craven Cottage.

Onwards, as ever.

Just another day before we can all just go back to the football and concentrate on the players we have. And if we're left with Defoe, Pav and Crouch - so be it. Can't do much else but support them.

COYS.