Top bloke from the Park Lane Lower
Tuesday, September 25, 2012 at 10:00PM From the archives, January 2009.
We are Tottenham
“Alright mate? Tommy Tottenham ‘ere. Top bloke from the Park Lane lower. F*cking ‘ave it every week with the Spurs, home and away. You know what I’m sayin? Giving it large. Proper fan. Don’t miss a game or a cheeky pint before or after kick-off. Happy with the 3-1 Wigan result. About time that Russian did the business for us. He’s been pony. £14M for an International player who can’t even settle in a Prem League club? You what? Exactly. Reckon he just about saved his Spurs career with that brace, otherwise ‘arry would have had him back on a plan to Siberia. You know what I mean?
Too many pounces down our way at the minute. And I’ll tell you this, for £700 I reckon I’m well justified to make my opinion public, at the game, if I don’t like what I see. You know what I’m talking about, right? David bleeding Bentley. Utter pants. Can’t do a thing, not a single thing, right. I mean, he’s a footballer, no? Yeah? Then beat the first man. Play the simple ball. Trying way too hard, got not an iota of confidence that lad. Which is why he needs to know that he’s playing sh*te, cause ‘arry aint telling him. He’s picking him every bleeding game.
Oi, David, you are crap mate. And I’m gonna keep reminding you how crap you are every time you pick up the ball and try something fancy-dan. It’s the only way we’re gonna get it through to your thick highlighted skull, ya get me? Same goes for any Spurs player not doing it out on the pitch. You’re gonna get it in the neck, cause you’re on 30k+ a week, and I’ve spent a ton for my match-day experience. That’s travel, ticket, beers in, pie and chips and a match-day programme. So show me some loyalty, yeah? Give me a performance otherwise you’re gonna get a verbal smack. Hold on for second...
STAND UP IF YOU HATE ARSENAL, STAND UP IF YOU HATE ARSENAL, STAND UP IF YOU HATE ARSENAL, STAND UP IF YOU HATE ARSEEEEEEEEEENAL.....
So, yeah. Bentley. Waste of money right there for ya. And talking about waste of money, that Ghaly back on the bench again. What you playing at ‘arry? You mugging us off or what? Know your history. He showed some proper disrespect to the shirt when he discarded it the way he did. Proper home support that was. The way we got to change ‘arry’s decision to bring him on with the booing. Class. Don’t want him anywhere near the club I love. We need players who want to play for the shirt, and not throw it away. I aint having him on the pitch again. What if he strips off and chucks it in my face? Last thing I want to see is a player push forward and attempt to make things happen, but mis-place all his passes. One Bentley is enough thank you very much. Error of judgement is inexcusable and unforgivable. Like that Judas, Campbell. You know what I mean? Got no time for has-beens.
I’ll show my support right, I’ll show it, but I’ll show it where it matters. For the individuals who deserve a good song, a mouthy boisterous chant for the ages.
Like that Defoe. Proper Spurs is young Jermain. 64 goals in 110 starts for us. Well worth spunking £20M on to bring him back. That’s some half decent sell-on value for Pompey there. Levy, take notes son. White and blue blood running through those veins. Can’t wait to have the little menace back in the Lilywhite. He’s exactly what we need at the minute.
JERMAIN DEFOE HE’S A YIDDO, JERMAIN DEFOE HE’S A YIDDO...
‘ave it mate. That’s what I call support yeah. Singing for a player who doesn’t even play for us. We transcend the terrace. The Park Lane yoof go beyond the norm when it comes to a good song. We are existentially vocal. You know what I’m saying right? Proper illuminati sh*t. If you ain’t Spurs, then you got no chance of understanding us. You don’t need to understand it. Ask Gomes. Doesn’t drop the clangers that much anymore does he? Course not. Cause we gave him our backing. Touch. Makes your eyes bleed our home support. And that’s how it is. That’s how we do it.
You wait till we move into our 60,000 seater stadium. Us proper fans might be a minority at the minute, but hold onto ya hats. We’ll be ‘aving it louder than ever.
Supporter power innit. Ain’t no pantomime. It’s our right to support the club and the team, and if it means weeding out the mediocre elements with a bit of tidy pro-active sing-a-longs and boos, then job done. Cheque in the post right, ‘arry? Cause you got a couple of thousand coaches in the stands doing the job for you. Hahahaha, Come on you Spurs....”
Our guest blogger, Tommy Tottenham, is a loyal Spurs supporter who goes to every game.
Reader Comments (40)
Not only do you endorse the "Oh when the Spurs" podcast, you also let them use DML as their blog!
Except, T, it isn't actually from the archive, it is what we call 'satire' .......................
Is all this navel gazing healthy?
You've made it clear. You're a much better supporter than most. Well done.
Live and let live FFS!
I see Tommy is not attacking the Stewards/Police,breaking up the seats,throwing darts,marbles,coins etc,no rioting(like just outside the WEST LOWER)not attacking the opposing fans.TOMMY IS NOT A REAL FAN LIKE YOU,you are using your keyboard to SLATE TOMMY , he is some kind of lower life when he vents his displeasure at what is happening on the pitch by BOOING.I say gag you not TOMMY by taking away your keyboard and banning you from the net,how would you like those apples.
...well said TMWNN
Spooky is the model THFC fan and anyone who is different is pure scum. This is probably the 10th blog saying the same thing.
Look, that first half performance was appalling. Lennon and Walker were arguing on the pitch, Jan himself said he understood the fans disappointment and that the players were "angry". QPR were teaching us a lesson in our own patch.
Its taking a while, but Spooky and his legion of "truest" fans will eventually realize that people express their feelings in different ways. I'm not for booing at half time....but I do understand where it all comes from.
Keep on flogging the dead horse though Spooky,,,I enjoy reading this style of posts :-)
Piss out my a$$
Oh dear Errol, look, that small boy seems lost. ' Hello mate are you ok?'
-No mister, them bad boys won't play with us -
'Us? There are more of you?'
-Yes mister, 6 -
'Well, why don't you just stop crying - run along and play with, your friends then?'
- Cant! -
'Cant? Why can't you?'
- Coz...-
'Coz wot?'
-Just coz-
'Look son, if you want me and my mate to help, stop crying and start talking, so come on, why? And please... No coz'
-Cozzz-
'Errol; no mate - No Errol, NO! For fcuk sake Errol put him down...FUCKIN HELL ERROL YOU MAD CUNT, CAN'T YOU SEE HES UPSET? ! SHAKING HIM AINT GONNA HELP MATTERS...NOW IS IT! come on kid he didnt mean it, don't be afraid. Tell us for fuck sake. Why can't you just play with, your friends? Why?
- coz we're playing The totalitarian game -
'tootally what!!!!!! you snivelling little shit?!' Errol, chuck him in the lake, I'll get the beers in'
I have a solution to you dilemma, a dilemma which seems to be eating you like tape worm! Stop moaning and start singing....louder than the bad boys booing! Simple really......
If I never posted stuff like this, you wouldn't have a forum to come on here and disagree with me. Who said I was the model THFC fan? This isn't about being better than anyone, stop deflecting. You do get this post is actually from 2009? I shared it for laughs. I can't help it if some of you take life waaaaaay too seriously.
Fact is, you bang on about flogging dead horses, yet you always seem to skip and dance around the fact that there is no basis for the attitude of most of these people who boo when it doesn't go THEIR way. They think they've paid their money so how dare they don't witness entertainment and an easy 3-0 win. But yeah, have a go at the bloke that is stating the obvious and instead 'understand' the pussy in the stand that throws his dummy onto the pitch.
La la la la la la la
As for TMWNN. He's a strange one. Can never tell if he's for real or not. We all know most people that post on HH are aliases, so gotta be suspicious about that.
x
I'm joking by the way T. Please don't boo me.
I love Tommy Tottenham. Get him to write more stuff.
We signed the boy from Amsterdam you know you know
We might score goals from corners now yido yido
And if a gooner tries to pass he'll put the w****r on his arse
Jan vertonghen TOTTENHAMS number 5
Na na na na na na na na nana nana etc -
This is the song worthy for superjan not the dross being spouted in the park lane end " jan jan superjan". Coys use u imagination not the same old songs recycled year after year!! We are better than that. Come on u lilywhites!!!!
Just like you have the right to print your opinion on line a fan has the right to Boo.This is called freedom of speech and does not break the law. Their is lot of insulting under the banner SATIRE and well you know it.I have to say I was at Tottenham in the bad old days of fighting on the terraces and I would rather the simple Booing.I get a chill up my spine every time I see the pitch,love my club,enjoy the banter,get in an hour early just to soak it all up.Love the chanting and the booing all part of the day IMO.
Surely as this article is a re-post it says the same attitudes were around 3years ago??? I imagine they will still be around in another 30 years. The booing at halftime was minimal. If people want to boo let them boo, so what!? some shout and sing , some boo and some stay silent and watch the game. all are equal. all are spurs fans. I like this blog a lot, I have found recently on here in comments and other social media that the idea 'telling/suggesting to people how to support' their team is all too common. i imagine nobody wants to see something they hold dear belittled or boo-ed by anyone, you wont stop it. sing louder!.
20 games gone, we're sat in 17th place. You could probably make a better argument at that stage (although you'd still be in the wrong).
It is freedom of speech, sure, but the reason I've blogged this so many times is that the ones that are pro-booing keep refusing to face up to all the other points. Notice how it's all gone a little quiet now on the anti-AVB vibe that supported the booing initially. At least I'm consistent. My dear friends are the ones that keep dipping in and out.
But fair enough, the fact you get a chill up your spine gets me tingling (in purely manly way). Fact is, we are literally a handful of games into the season. It's ridiculous that people have this attitude so early on and bang on about 'I've paid £40 for this shit' - well, don't buy the sodding ticket then.
'telling/suggesting to people how to support'
I've said it a fair few times, I can't control or wish to tell people how to support Spurs but sure, although I think the attitude behind the booing is the main problem. Again, this won't be discussed in any great detail by the haters as their argument fails apart. I hope (which is what football tends to be built on) I truly do we have a great season, I'll then post around 50 articles referring back to all this at the end of the season. I'm sure the response will be something like 'well, it was my right to boo, I did, and the team started to play well, so I was justified in doing so blah blah blah'.
If we flop? I'll be re-posting lyrics to 'Can't smile without you'.
Also, as a footnote, I welcome people disagreeing with what I write. The whole point is sharing my thoughts and if anyone can be arsed to share theirs, then job done.
That includes you too Ronnie babe.
Just like you have the right to print your opinion on line a fan has the right to Boo.This is called freedom of speech and does not break the law. Their is lot of insulting under the banner SATIRE and well you know it.I have to say I was at Tottenham in the bad old days of fighting on the terraces and I would rather the simple Booing.I get a chill up my spine every time I see the pitch,love my club,enjoy the banter,get in an hour early just to soak it all up.Love the chanting and the booing all part of the day IMO.
@ Perryman
Absolutely, everybody have the right to express
their feelings by booing or by singing, however the
Question before us is, -which of the two above medthods
do you think cheer up our Boys The most ?
Spooky I actually agree that Booing is counter productive and the attitude behind it in some cases moronic, I would like to think for the majority it nothing other then sheer frustration as a collective, because shouting " Bale is no good as a left back, switch jan across and bring Caulker on" in unison over a protracted period is just not possible and last time i checked there wasnt an AVB suggestion box.
I do hope the AVB haters are proved wrong, not because i think hes The One but because if he does then my beloved spurs will!
Must say i do not boo,I support a fantastic CEO Daniel Levy,love the future with AVB,proud HH poster,wear a15 year old shirt,love been outside the ground with my fellow fans,enjoy reading this blog but will always support the right of my fellow SPURS to BOO if they so choose.MUCH MUCH better then the violence of the past.
You know that thing where people say 'what a cracking atmosphere, was amazing' ?
Well, that.
This must be getting frustrating for you Spook? Look, No one is suggesting that the Lane becomes a totalitarian state in enforceing a strict "how to support/act whilst in the Stadium" manuel, it's your right, we get that. The questions you should ask yourselves are. 1. What is your primary function as a fan/supporter? Is it to support the team/club? Or is it to act as another assistant coach to VB by offering advice? Secondly, do you think that booing the players helps? If the answer is yes that that implies that the players and coaches are incapable of noticing this for themselves. Ket VB and Freund etc do their jobs and lets continue to do ours. Support the team and love the shirt.
In the initial aftermath after the West Brom game, I was angry, sure. Even shouted some shit at individuals but this did not deter me from signing or cherring on the team. We all get frustrated, t's about chanelling that frustration into something positive. I initially thought Spooky was telling people how to think//support and realised how stupid that was, the idea is to try and get the fans that boo to understand why they are wrong, as sppoky says, once you drill down a bit on their arguments you can see that it has no basis in logic or reason. COYS
Thank you Allen for your reply.IMO a player on£40000-£70000 a week does not give a fig about what a fan does,this might seen cynical, as for the question does booing affect the players,as i said i do not boo,but the team pulled up their socks in the second half against QPR all be it with a different formation.
Yes Spooky in a nutshell.
Your attempts at trying to blog people into supporting the club as well as you and the contrived 'rent-a-mob' 1882 movement, are about as futile as booing players into playing well.
I don't agree with the booing, but I also don't agree with nanny supporters getting all clever, hen pecking people into how to behave, hiding under the all encompassing banner of 'satire'.
Whatever happened to just slagging off other clubs? All this introspection is way over the top. It's an effing football match!
x
Yeah, if its only football lets just leave it all alone then, I wont voice my opinion then you wont have an opinion to voice either, at least not one I'd be aware of. I don't preach like some people that ram down the throats of their readers and then seek to patronise and belittle them. Hey, if we all stopped writing at less it will make it less complex for people - not needing to pick and choose when to front up and have something to say in response - usually a dig. Mostly digs actually. Which is fine, but it's still selective but hey, not like I can control anyone or influence for that matter.
I'm always here, the readers have the luxury of picking and choosing your moments. I guess I could take all of your collective wisdoms and tag you as an utter misery. But I won't. I enjoy the banter. Even if I suspect an underlying agenda in there somewhere.
You all seem to be transfixed on this particular article written back on 2009, but not everything I write is satire.
Last time I slagged off another team I had 200 gooners calling me a cunt. Hey, I guess that works just as well as this. Could give that another go? Or I could copy and paste shit.
PS - the fact you call 1882 a rent a mob tells me everything I need to know. Hardly contrived when all it amounts to is letting other supporters know that want to stand and sing that they can. How else are we meant to do it, via carrier pigeon? The fact we even have to suggest this goes back to the whole fucking argument we're having in the first place.
1. What is your primary function as a fan/supporter? Is it to support the team/club? Or is it to act as another assistant coach to VB by offering advice?
> Again, the point is we've got fans turning up and turning on players and the team after minutes. People disgruntled before the 10 minute mark. Okay, how about this, do you think the people, the 'supporter's that behave in this manner (whether they boo or not) - do you think they'll still pay to watch Spurs if we plummeted to mid-table for the next 5 years? Or am I going to be accused now of once more telling people they HAVE to go to Spurs no matter what to be classed as a proper fan? Not everyone gets to go to games for a variety of reasons. It's not about that, but those that are there, well some that go have a disproportionate sense of entitlement that is skewered.
It's a bit like Rimmer (Red Dwarf) in the Back to Reality episode being told..."Are you telling me that you were playing the pratt Rimmer for all that time. For 4 years. Wow, that's a classic that is"
You're doing it wrong. They are doing it wrong.
Ramos season or maybe it was further back to Jol, I think, Wigan at home? Sorry, memory not that great. Losing. Do remember 20 minutes of singing blue and white army. Non-stop. That's fucking glory and if that classes me as some emotive knee-jerk rent-a-gob, so be it.
You do get the ones that boo, the disgruntled ones, they are equally as vocal about all this? They don't blog granted, but they think the ones that disagree with them are wrong. Not because of freedom of expression but because we're deluded.
Crazy times. Sack the board, we drew at home to WBA and Norwich.
Hands up, contrived 'rent-a-mob' was a bit below the belt. I was there that night, albeit in the Park Lane, you lot were brilliant. But, I was also in the Bricklayer's before the game (It's okay, I wasn't stalking you) - you have the gall to call me strange? It was like stepping into the set of the Star War's bar. ;-)
You were in the Bricklayers before the game? Why the fuck did you not work your way past security and come over to the VIP section to say hello? I left my light saber at home. Although to be honest, I'm more Chewbacca than Jedi.
I've been out the country for three years, so my fan credentials wouldn't have got me that far. Besides, there was some fella with a tripod taking photos out the back; made me nervous. I saw Flav floating around though. Proper fan that boy.
Spooky - was that question aimed at me of just a general thought you are throwing out there?
Sevilla in the cup always sticks out for me.
2-0 down after no time. Score 4-1 on aggregate? Half time players cheered off.
And after half time non stop Blue and White army. Pure unadulterated support. We drew 2-2 and went out but I walked out that night so pleased to be Tottenham.
(Also remember for a European QF the ground wasn't full which always make me question our claimed legions of support. Anyway tangent.)
Point being, right now if the same thing happened I don't think the crowd would react the same way. But maybe I'm wrong.
Spot on again spooky ,now I'm not one to judge if another chooses
to boo,not that I'm for it but ffs I let's just get our
renowned atmosphere back and lets get rockin again!!!
There's no doubt that those ten minute bursts of blue & white
army are not only a sign of the yids togetherness but fucking intimidating
at the same time COYS
Spooky you know what you are talking about and you are right but rightous too, and the rightous bit is getting on my tits. I am against the booing but I am against there being one version of the truth for the perfect fan that you are and anyone who thinks otherwise is a harry loving trog.
I actually think Spooky has been remarkably conciliatory towards the boo-boys in recent posts. I just don't understand the booing mentality.
The players/manager need to know that the performance is unacceptable - you think they don't know this? This is a squad who either played with us in the Champs League a couple of years ago or out of the new signings have come from established Champions League teams or are young players who have made the move to Spurs to try and get there. They know it's not acceptable drawing at home to Norwich. Furthermore by booing at half time, when we're drawing, surely this is reducing the booing of its currency. Booing should be reserved for when you're sitting in the relegation zone having been spanked by all your local rivals, your chairman has sacked the manager, appointed his son and sold the star striker to fund the mortgage on his mansion. It's not for when you've not clicked into gear for 45 minutes. If you must boo, boo when it's bad - which it's certainly not at the moment.
I find it completely counter-productive - silence followed by booing is an invitation to the opposition. Atmosphere equals points - not every game but over the course of a season a fierce home atmosphere will turn a few losses into draws and draws into wins. Booing costs points. I also find it a bit unseemly booing at home - it's like a couple having a row in public. Atmosphere has gone downhill so much in recent years.
I think the issue is that football fan expectations are on a ratchet - they go up very easily and won't come down (not that I feel we have a need to downgrade our expectations currently - a change of management/system is likely to take a bit of time and a few dodgy performances to bed in). No one was booing a home draw at half time in the early 2000s. The team has changed since then but I guess what has not changed for me is that I've always got as much (if not more) out of the football from meeting up with my mates and having a few beers as I have from the actual result on the pitch. Obviously it's better when we win but it's not the be all and end all for me.
The other thing that seems to have changed over time (although it might just be me getting older) is that everyone seems to be a c**t these days. Opposition players are c**ts, stewards are c**ts, Flanders is a c**t, even I was at one game for wearing a half and half Spurs FC Twente scarf that someone mistook for an Arsenal scarf.
Rambling now - overall I think the boo-boys just need to man up and support the club. I've no time for the "paid my money" argument - proves you're new breed - atmosphere was plenty good five years ago and we were paying our money then.
Mentioning great atmospheres of the past few years in the comments above I remember the home leg against Seville when it was all but over after ten minutes. The chorus in the second half was epic.
Atmospheres are created by spontaneous emotionl reactions to pre concieved expectations, and not by chief whips. Emotions can't be contrived, manipulated,or designed, unless you're North Korean, or work in Chessington world of adventures.
If someone's depressed - feeling low; angry; let down; confused, you can't just click your fingers repeatedly - an inch from their nose - shouting 'smile you bastard, smile'
You can leave a flag on a seat though and a lot of people will pick it up and wave it around a lot with a smile on their face.
At least we are not a Library .
QPR thought we were last weekend.
LOL yesterday, on way back from podcast recording. Myself, Ricky, Dan and Ty. All Yids (obviously). Loads of gooners at Finsbury Park station. No noise, but this one bloke screeches, in fact no, it wasn't even a screech and was no way a shout: "What do we think of Tottenham?"
Response?
Nothing.
Not sure if I should be offended or not.
'QPR thought we were last weekend'
It weren't that bad Spook, you could clearly hear Villas Boas's ring going throughout the whole of the first half - hardly conducive to a library mate. If lady luck hadn't have swooped in a jammed Defoe's head into his neck allowing Faurlin a free header - Boas would've been chased down Tottenham high rd into the underground system, were he would've spent the rest of his days training rats to move in formation.. The words Skin and Teeth spring to mind!
spurs. uk's finest.