Stunning super show sees sensational Spurs smiling
Tuesday, April 10, 2012 at 8:24AM Spurs 5 Norwich 0
No need for a full strength side so soon after the away trip to Sunderland. Tottenham's resolve and focus on securing a Champions League spot was solid in selection and application in a scintillating display at White Hart Lane that saw the home side dispatch the visitors with bullish determination and high end quality football.
Spurs reverted back to the successful 442 which has seen much acclaim this season with Saha and Defoe rekindling their telepathic partnership. King lined up at the back alongside Kaboul and the midfield saw Bale and Lennon on the flanks with Livermore and Modric in the middle. With the Chelsea game at Wembley practically being played tomorrow (technically it's on Sunday evening), Spurs benched the likes of Adebayor and van der Vaart. Both spectators. Both lucky enough to have the best seats in the house, munching on popcorn as they watched the dismantling of Lambert's men as the hosts displayed guile, spirit and tenacity for the victory.
The first goal was majestic in its majesty. Bale, on the left cut inside and beat four men down the middle before running back 40 yards to then beat another four men again this time down the left hand flank before finally slotting the ball home for the 1-0. Because he could. Defoe was next when Saha played a beautiful dummy allowing the ball to land at JD's feet who scored with a deft touch, so good the referee awarded two goals for it much to the dismay of Paul Lambert.
3-0 at half time and more of the same followed in the second. Spurs continued to push forward with drive and astuteness, bullying Norwich, first to every ball and quick to lay it off and run into space to continue to carve and create more chances.
Saha, still standing in the same position he was in when he played the dummy in the first half, hit the post without having to move, instead preferring to use telekinesis. Then Modric almost scored directly from a corner, the bar this time getting in the way. Spurs fans were busy doing the Pozican (a Mexican Wave hybrid incorporating the Poznan) to concern themselves too much with the woodwork action. They knew it would only be a matter of time before another goal arrived.
The opposition continued to struggle with Spurs dominance in midfield, dictating play and tempo with Harry Redknapp dictating the tempo on the bench defeating Joe Jordan in a cheeky game of Mario Kart. Kevin Bond refused to be involved citing Just Dance as more his kind of thing. The Spurs defence had no tempo to concern themselves with having nothing to do other than tidy up the left-overs from the picnic they enjoyed whilst watching their team-mates in the far reaches of the pitch. Although the only complaint to be had was with Ledley King who didn't much like the cucumber and jam combo sandwiches although they all laughed about his hissy fit and then debated football boot colours over some glasses of Pimms.
Then it was 4-0 Spurs and game over. This time with a move that was started by that man Bale and finished by that man Bale. Bale in the middle played the ball out to the left where Bale picked it up and played a five touch one-two with Bale before a disguised pass gave Bale the chance to fire into the top corner. Bale gave the heart sign celebration to Bale and they passionately snogged for a few moments whilst others watched on. And touched themselves. Football bloggers in their armchairs already penning sonnets to the manager.
By now the Paxton was alight with flares and relentless singing whilst the West Stand bourgeoisie gave a nod of acceptance at the football below with a thumbs up.
There was time for a fifth, a wonderful wonderful set-piece. Benny taking the plaudits and taking advantage of an anomaly in the space time continuum to guide the ball into the net from around fifty yards out which saw the whole stadium erupt and stand up to applaud Tottenham reclaiming 3rd spot and that's when I dropped my crack pipe and realised I wasn't wearing any clothes.
Reader Comments (60)
@docomospur Comparing Modric to Cesc? Really??? What are you smoking?
Nice spin on yesterdays drab result Spooky and I find hard to believe that we are imploding in such a way, then again, with a manager such as Redknapp at the helm I must admit that I half expected the faeces to hit the proverbial fan at some moment in time. However, at no point did I envisage that it would be this bad, not too much that I can say here that has not been said already. Oh well, there only one thing for it then, I'll just have to focus on Sundays game at Wembley maybe...just maybe. He'll do the right thing!! COYS TTID!!!
Very good very good, yes there needs to be long term thinking, but if we dont get top 4 this season, in the next 5 games, we're putting ourselves 10 years back. That's why we're reaching for the crack pipe. Its a bloody serious 5 games that determine our long term future. And we cant change the manager or playing staff for these games. Its do or die. I'm afraid its close your eyes and pray time now.
Don't know where all the optimissim is coming from in these replies. Harry Redknapp is a lying, cheating, dishonest, disloyal, ugly, illiterate, piece of pure shite and at this moment in time, doesn't deserve taking seriously.
What a fucking cunt of an asshole.
You know what; We deserve all Harry throws at us and says about us. Harry should be roundly booed at Wembley and at every other game from now until the end of the season. He's the biggest Judas has ever been in charge of the Lane and that includes George Graham and Terry Neill (in fact they did their best, Harry's conning us for his own gain). He deserves nothing but contempt and I hope he gets it because, if he does, his true colours will come through, like they did when he called us idiots. He's a fucking big time disloyal Judas.
Its funny how everybody has woken up to the "long game plan". I was going on about it when we were playing Real and everybody forgot or did not care about top 4, it was about glory - glory for 2 f####ing games.
It seems that its finally sunk in!!
We should have played our strongest team on Saturday and forgot about Chelski because thats where its at - top 4. Ive been going on about it for 3 years - NOTHING BUT NOTHING else matters, 100 cups will not equal a top 4 every year.
What will a cup final bring us - one day of glory in the sun - ye great!!! a top 4 = £30 - £40 million, attracts the best players, keeps our best players and so on, whereas a cup final may give us £0.5 million at a shot at the Europa Cup - great!!
I hope we lose on Sunday, I really do, I dont want the team and a bunch of glory hunters playing out the rest of the season waiting for a crap cup final - I want top 4 and I want Euro championship football because this is what will bring us long term success both on the pitch and off the pitch. Think f'''ing long term - not short term - we need to build and this is it - NOW!!
Finishing outside top 4 is a massive step back- we lose our best players, we do not attract any players and we lose a shed load of money, stadium redevelopment delayed and so on. It may take another 3 years to have a go!! Are you all prepared for 3 years of 6th, 7th, 8th............im not!!!
Help! My knees! What's wrong with them?
Harry- he came, he saw, he got sponsored. A man dragged from obscurity. A self titled , self obsessed , self made millionaire...a man who claims he can neither write nor read, yet , y should he care- harry rednap..
is ready to be an England football manager at what ever the costs, he's in between contracts so just feels no loss- harry rednapp..
without a grain of respect from the fanbase' that he's left behind, but yet hes a man of the people what a torturess swine , Harry rednap -
he aimed for the top but then driopped to the middle, had everyone jiving to the crooked-ist fiddle, h'es mates with the media so don't give a piddle - harry rednap
his son is a model and has lovely hair, his misses is thick but what lovely pairs - jamie rednapp
together they speak with such authoritive tones , back on the telly again dad, yeah son, just a quickeegot golf in the morning ...then off to their homes - its the rednapps
now things are tits up ..hes off once again, to leave the tottenham died faithful like cun&& in the rain ..its the rednappss
youll catch him in papers with fame of your lucky , he so good he has bank accounts in the name of his puppies- harry rednapp
he called us animals a while back and again idiots of late - but dont question his excellence or youll be barred from the gates - harry rednapp
he played us like his tactics and then attracted the flies, hes full of shit when he speaks ..left us a packet of lies = harry rednapp
we got to the edges and saw the real deal but froze, hell get his as a wanker , they're always exposed - fu** U rednapp
he grabs anything he can to take the shots he deserves , from managers to players, my god its absurd - useless rednapp
he puts his arms around shoulders to bring players together, but this is the man whp says that his wife could do better - fu** u rednapp
he thinks hes a gpd the way he strutts and he talks, but not a shadow of the real managers in the line that he walks - phone-y rednapp
his bubble is sketchy and ready to burst, we did this withoutu with martin jol and held our own and we did it with worst - phyuccccccc******* uuuuuuuuuu redddnaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap
gityfs
@SPURSINCE82: Excellent piece of work there, our very own poet laureate no doubt. Good stuff mate!!
and it was a derby match as Spurs are the closest PL team to Norwich, as the canary flies!