Jim White's head fails to explode. It eats football instead.
Friday, September 2, 2011 at 12:58PM I guess I was asking for too much to see a Scanners type end to proceedings on Deadline Day. What we did witness instead was something far more horrific. Sky cameras covering Jim White's arrival to the Sky Sports News studios. Yes. Because from 8pm onwards we are blessed with a presenter that somehow manages to define the days chaotic scramble for signings purely based on the fact that there's a fluffer under the desk squeezing his balls tight for over three hours straight.
With each passing year it seems like the coverage of Deadline Day (in HD) takes on a Chris Morris/Alan Partridge vibe. It's not satirical, it's professionalism, yet it's practically a spoof when you have a grown man in a studio shouting during a link-up to another grown man standing outside a football club as they both scream about absolutely nothing.
When something does happen, we then have to endure buckets of ugly as we come to the realisation that only the facially disturbed frequent the Sky Cameras as they huddle around the lucky reporter waiting for the sighting of say, Peter Crouch. In Stoke, it was akin to their creator arriving from the heavens to bless them by virtue of autograph. Outside the Emirates some fans showed off their tattoos stating 'Prem winners 2012'. It's a minefield of mong wherever you dared to look.
One massively disappointing aspect of it all was the fact that the protracted saga of Modric to Chelsea lead by chief brokers (Sky Sports) failed to materialise No yellow-ticker after a summer where it constantly rained with Luka soundbites. It all ended with one from Harry Redknapp (who spent most of the day driving in and out of the Spurs Lodge to be interviewed via his car window with mic in face...or was it the same interview played over and over again? I get confused)...where was I? Oh yes, the soundbite that ended it all was from 'arry stating 'one million percent' in reply to Modric remaining at the club.
All in all, much ado about nothing. But we all know in this wonderful game of ours that nothing is always worth its weight in gold as something. As witnessed by Twitter for most of the evening. No matter the pointing and the shrugs of embarrassment, we all still somehow manage to get sucked in. Every single time.
So, I leave you with this. Ironically not via Sky but via The London Evening Standard. Remember, it's September 2nd today. The window has been closed for a day.
I know what you're thinking having clicked on that link. Jesus wept, right? And if Jesus was a football fan, he'd be left on the shelf.
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From the world famous secret studio of The Fighting Cock podcast team, it's episode six. Discussed in part one: Twitter re-tweet mission update. Man City debacle autopsy. Livermore > Modric. The truth behind Luka's performance against City. Formation headaches. Centre-back headaches. Positivity and negativity. Harry Redknapp is dissected (it gets ugly) along with our transfer dealings (pre-deadline day) and Neil the Cabbie is back with a brand new rant. In part two we laugh at the scum (lol) and whether we should in fact be laughing at them. We laugh at them anyway. We've got emails. Also Daniel Levy. Do we love him? Or do we not? Do you love him? A twist on the Tottenham Whisper. And we end with a super-quick game of Killer.
Love the shirt.
Reader Comments (36)
Like Harry talking to two-bob journos, It never really ends. Ever.
That's why we should have got shot of the cunt. This isn't going to stop until he is gone.
It took two of them to write 343 words. That says it all.
I couldnt have put into better words your description of the "fans" that wait outside these grounds/training centres on transfer deadline day shouting and cheering when the like of Peter Crouch are announced as signing...
"Minefield of Mong"
Classic.
not surprising ever since this: http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/sport/article-23410018-spurs-ban-standard.do
I have to question what value journalism has today with regards to sports journalism, and specifically football. I for one will never buy the standard again in protest of their behaviour ;)
Even for free, The Standard is a rip off.
Can't say I'm surprised by that article, especially when the rags are already saying we've opened negotiations to bring Cahill in in January.
One day the penny's going to finally drop that sports journalists inhabit a parallel universe to the rest of us. A universe in which Man U; Man C; Chelsea; Arsenal and Liverpool are in the market to buy every known footballer on the planet, while every known footballer also wants to join them. A world in which, if Modric isn't sold in January 12, he will unquestionably, nailed-on be sold in August 12. Or January 13. And so it goes.
And one day they'll probably be right.
The rest of us meanwhile should learn how to make origami sunflowers from the back pages. To turn them into fire-lighters. Or basically do anything other than read them.
I thought deadline day was pretty boring this year. I also like the balance in the Spurs squad for this coming season. But if Adebayor doesn't work out and Defoe still doesn't score like he used to, we're screwed. I'm actually a little worried. As it has become oh so typical at Spurs either we could fly this season. Really fly. Or collapse. There'll be no middle ground.
I'm more worried about the defence and the all round general team spirit this year. There are a lot of unhappy players in the squad, add them to an unhappy manager, who actually threw a game to prove a point to Levy, and there could be trouble.
I'm going to have say 'collapse'. Sorry, but there's always next year.
Still, if canthitabarndor and JD fail us, there's always Dos Santos who can play as a false number 'TBC' . ;)
TMWNN, I have to disagree on one issue. I don't think that Harry in any way deliberately set up the team in order to throw the game on sunday, just to make a point.
I just don't think he's that clever.
Spooky I like your musings but delete my post again and you will have lost another viewer. Only gonna warn everyone here once, spurs are capable of a top 3 finish if Ade/Defoe and King/Gallas play well. otherwise it's top 10 at best.
I've seen less Knee-Jerking at performances of the Can-Can.
Kev, I haven't deleted a thing.
If anyone is having problems posting comments, then use contact form top right hand corner to let me know.
Someone on twitter has already been in touch to say he can't post at all (which sounds like the old spam filter problem).
Clear cache, re-start browser.
Would appreciate people don't jump to conclusions. Ta.
:)
4 keepers in the 25 man squad?!?! Seriously?!??
We need to get stuck in now and see where we go. I only hope 'Harry's head is right', as we can do without any more of his bullshit.
PLN, you ain't seen nothing yet. Wait till Wolves beat us, then Liverpool.
Serious point, how much longer can we or should we keep Ledley???
We will keep Ledley until we have another "homegrown" player that we bring in i.e Cahill.
That's the reason we have 4 'keepers - Alnwick will never play, but he's the all important 8th Homegrown player.
is it true that transfers to turkey can happen till next week (possibly more dough in the kitty for gio) or is this more paper drivel...??....also what would we get for him - him being a non league game playing intl star ??
Someone sent me this Spooky (don't know the true source)- what do you think?
The Redknapp Myth
A notable feature of the reaction of many Spurs fans in the wake of what transpired to be a fairly low key window is one of disappointment and frustration.
Tottenham didn't spend big money this summer. A selection of shrewd and obscure loan signings and freebies and a relatively fiscal £5-6m spent on Parker. This prudence seems to have provoked the ire of a large section of Tottenham supporters - it seems they have been left unsatisfied by the lack of a £30m Rossi, a £25m Llorente, or even a £15m Cahill to propel them towards CL qualification. Opinion varies on how and on whom the money should have been spent but most are in agreement that it should have been spent...somehow on someone. City, United and Liverpool all spent £50m plus. Even Arsenal spent in excess of £40m. These, we are told, are Tottenham's immediate rivals.
The finger of blame seems to point not at Harry but at Levy for the failure to compete in the transfer market. Spurs pocketed some £30m from their CL run last season and that sum again this summer from the sale of fringe players. The search for a new stadium is never too far away from ones thoughts when assessing Tottenham's financial position but it is fair to say that the money probably is there - somewhere between £15-30m should be available to acquire the marquee signing Tottenham fans crave.
The reason this did not happen is simple - Harry Redknapp, wheeler dealer extraordinaire, is a poor judge of a player. A manager who has built his reputation not on tactics, not on footballing philosophies but on player trading has a shockingly poor track record in his adopted speciality.
A quick look at Harry's signings in the four windows he has guided Tottenham through show the following acquisitions - Palacios, Keane, Defoe, Chimbonda, Bassong, Crouch, Gallas, VDV, Pienaar.
An assortment ranging from the average at best (Chimbonda) to the occasionally genius (VDV) but the illustrative aspect of this list is not the quality of the players purchased but rather the amount of them who have since been sold. Palacios, Keane, Chimbonda, Crouch have all been deemed to be of insufficient quality to represent THFC - these were Harry's own signings being deemed not good enough for Harry's 25-man squad! Bassong further illustrates the point as it is an open secret he would have been booted out had Harry succeeded in acquiring his replacement. Gallas, VDV and Pienaar have all been at the club 12 months or less so can hardly be used to disprove the theory - in fact I'd wager that come next summer two of the three will be out the door.
Further proof of Redknapp's inability to spot a player can be found internally. Bale was touted to Nottingham Forest (on loan) a mere matter of weeks before the Welsh wizard began the ascent which culminated in him becoming Europe's hottest property post San Siro hat-trick. Giovanni Dos Santos (remember him?) continues to shine as the talisman of one of the world's most exciting national teams only to return to Spurs Lodge to be farmed out on loan before he has time to hang up his coat.
Many will argue Levy withheld funds this summer in anticipation of Harry's impending instalment as England manager, thus enabling the new manager to spend the money on his own recruits. I disagree. Class players bought this window will still be class next summer, irrespective of a change in management, and would benefit the long-term future of the football club. Rather, I think Levy withheld funds as he has no faith in Harry's ability to identify true quality.
How can you trust a man with a transfer war chest when 50% of his signings are deemed surplus to requirements within a couple of seasons? Then again maybe I'm being too harsh on Harry, its not as if his transfer activities have left previous clubs with any prob...oh.
Hooray, hooray... VdV's torn hamstring's been fixed - wow, amazing, wonderful, put out the flags, fags and bins - Seriously - what do they think this is - Penn & Teller Fool Us auditions?
I reiterate - what a fcuking disgrace
Scalytomato. Unless I'm mistaken I think that's a letter sent in by a Spurs fan to the Football365 Mailbox.
WFRF,
There you go. Like I said, someone sent me the piece & I didn't know the origin. Thanks for the info.
Rafa's been ommitted from our Europa League squad, as has Friedel.
I saw this on the website. Can't be right, surely? Or has Rafa stamped his feet and asked not to partake in the non-CL comp? If so, would be a tad ridiculous.
Unless Harry has no desires to take it seriously.
Where has this squad list for the euro's come from? I have looked through the official site and there is no mention of it there so maybe just someone playing? But if not why name virtually the whole squad but not VdV? seems an odd thing to do.
Not according to our squad on the UEFA website...
Wouldn't trust UEFA website either though - Crouch, Keane, Palacios, Hutton & Jenas are listed.
Presumably that was the squad for the play-offs, rather than the squad for the proper games.
With him never being at 100% fitness, I can understand why VdV would be left out.
I would also still wager that the U21 players will get as many games as the first team squad. After all, they count separately and don't get added to the 25 man squad.
Apparently Coubillay and Ceballos don't qualify via the U21 ruling as they haven't been at the club long enough.
I presume this also explains Lukaku being left out of Chelsea's CL squad - he won't be able to register as U21 as he's only just signed.
Actually, the official squad is on the UEFA website: http://www.uefa.com/uefaeuropaleague/season=2012/clubs/club=1652/index.html
Need to scroll down to see it.
With Rafa’s fitness issues I don’t have a problem keeping him out of a chilly trip to one of those SSR’s. As I understand it, you get to re-register a squad for the knock outs and I’d imagine he’ll be on the squad for those if we get that far.
Interesting to see that, just days after spouting to the papers that he's interested in playing in Italy, Sandro has signed a new 5 year contract.
Seems like Levy is ensuring the best players sign long term deals in order to extract maximum transfer fee.
what am i missing sandro only joined last year - only played 26 games for us and he gets a new five year contract.....what did he sign when he joined..and presume he wasnt on peanuts......dont get it.
Thinking who should partner Adebayor tomorrow. My vote is for fresh air with 5 in the middle instead.
Freddy
Charly Dawsy Kingy Benny
Lenny Scotty Huddy Luky Baley
Ady
With that line up I am sure Ade will get the goals and we wont get rolled over in the middle, 2-0 to Spurs.
If Ade is not settled enough to start then we are up the creek as any combination of Pinky, Perky, or Dosy up front will likely be eaten alive by Wolves in the first ten minutes.