Spurs questions that need to be answered

The Countdown to the 2009/2010 Season

Some questions on my mind at the minute...

Does David Bentley have a future at Spurs?

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Just how long does Ledley King have left?

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Has Adel Taarabt found his level in the Championship?

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Does no Comolli mean no continental scouting for options other than old has-beens and unobtainable targets?

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What does Jermaine Jenas do exactly?

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Does the club plan to spend the half-time intervals at the Lane giving away more copies of The Opus? Bring back the Thomson one-on-one shoot-outs.

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Why did we not pay Zenit the £22M for Arshavin?

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Was Pav’s form last season down to not ever being 100% fit or is he simply another overly expensive average player that we defaulted to because our first option never materialised and giving him the benefit of the doubt because he sort of looks like Teddy Sheringham?

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Why did Chirpy get plastic surgery? I know it’s been a few seasons since the change over, but he still riles me. I don’t like the blokes attitude walking from stand to stand like some meaningless clubber on ecstasy, hugging people. The insufferable show-off.

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Is Modric set to remain out on the left, drifting in and causing havoc for opposing teams? Of course he bloody will.

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Will the Tottenham faithful begin to show patience and support for Robbie Keane as he continues his rehabilitation after his Anfield nightmare?

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Is Luka Modric going to destroy the Premier League this up and coming season? Of course he bloody will.

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If Levy stands his ground and Sunderland do the same, then logically you’d expect Bent to remain at Spurs because Bruce will not have matched our transfer estimation of the player. If that’s the case, we are stuck with him. But we know that’s not going to happen. Which means in all likelyhood, we will drop his value a little bit and Sunderland will meet us half-way. So rather than drag this out up until the final day of the window, how about putting everyone out of their misery and just accept we won’t be getting £16M or whatever for him. Is there a question in there? No? To sum it up...why do we do this Custer’s Last Stand dance every time when the end result is the other club always get their man?

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If Gio can do it for Mexico why is he not good enough for a first team place at the Lane?

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Will young Defoe ever learn how to beat the offside trap?

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Will Lennon push on and build on the progress made last season?

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How many DVD’s will the club release this season, covering score-draws?

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Seriously. Chirpy, London Bridge, Sunday at 1pm? I will end you.

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Why exactly did we re-sign Pascal Chimbonda and does Harry intend to use him in any shape or form this season?

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Seriously, Patrick Vieira? Let him go back to the swamp so their fans can back-track over their laughter that he was going to sign for us because last week he was a crock and has-been but since Wenger spoke he's suddenly their answer. Do one you miserable hypocrites.

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Who will be our breakthrough player of the season?

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How long will it take Harry Redknapp to coin a new catchphrase after the season starts? I reckon nine games.

"Nine games, twenty points"

More questions next week. I'm off down to the local with Mrs Spooky to get smashed on rum and then probably fit in a cheeky curry. Have a stonking Saturday night people.