Supernova Darren Bent

There are many unexplained things in the universe. Many of which are beyond the realms of human understanding. We simply do not have the capacity, for example, to understand the concept of what existed before time itself. Not that time exists anyway, as it’s simply a measurement we use to govern the passage of existence from our own perspective. If there was a big bang, what existed (using the concept of time) a second before it happened? Or an hour before? Does one universe expand infinitely forever or does it eventually collapse in on itself and implode, then explode…creating a big bang and the birth of a new universe? Are we the first universe of its kind or are we the result of the millionth big bang? Was there ever a definitive beginning? If there was, then how can the nothingness that existed beforehand be defined?

These unanswered questions do not stop us from completing our mundane schedule of sleep, work, eat, relax, sleep, eat, procreate, sleep, work.....and so on. And by the time human life exhausts itself from existence, the universe probably won’t even know we existed in the first place. We are pretty insignificant - one planet in a universe of billions upon billions of galaxies.

It’s quite probable that there are other planets out there that have allowed for life to evolve. And their version of life may be incomprehensible in comparison to ours in about 1000 different ways - like the mixture of chemicals on their own planet, their conception of time and their rate of evolutionary progression. Billions and billions of planets. Billions of societies. Billions of lives being lived.

And yet out of all the billions in the universe, Planet Earth is the one that manages to birth Darren Ashley Bent. The one and same Bent replacing the injured Carlton Cole in the England squad for this Wednesdays World Cup qualifier against the Ukraine. A cosmic event equivalent to a rock the size of a penny disintegrating in the earth’s atmosphere.

There are probably a billion Darren Bents plotted around the vast expanding space above us (I'm basing that on the assumption that alien planets play competitive sports). Some might even possess an abundance more all-round ability to their game that just having a knack of being in the right place at the right time to witness a ball bounce of a shin and into the net.

But more than likely, they are not too dis-similar to the version we have on this planet.

A lucky star.

Darren - fingers crossed for Wednesday. I hope you come off the bench and score with your bum.

Bent - a-ah - saviour of the universe
Bent - a-ah - he'll save everyone of us
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Bent - a-ah - he's a miracle
Bent - a-ah - king of the impossible

Lost in translation: Upson wants to be King?

Ledley gets selected for England. Harry has a fit. Fabio explains he wanted to see King for himself within the England set-up. King arrives. King leaves. Harry has another twitch aimed towards Fabio, who cites the Hutton injury issues to call Harry a hypocrite. Words still exchanged via exaggerated tabloid articles, including the possiblity of King perhaps being selected for England in the future. In what type of capacity, who knows.

It then all went quiet for about 20 seconds, and Matthew Upson decided that his opinion on the subject was so important, he shared it with us. Not Rio. Or Terry. But Upson. Here's the quote:

“The Ledley King situation is difficult as he is a fantastic player and everybody sees his performances. It is amazing how he can perform at that level without training.

But when you come here with England, there is a big emphasis on the training. We turn up on Monday and the training is intense, full-on. You have to recover in the afternoons because we do that all week. It would be difficult to excuse a player from training and then play him in the team. That would not fit in with the culture of the squad"

Hilarious. What culture of the squad is Upson refering to exactly? The one that sees us losing penalty shoot-outs or the one that sees players who shine for their club but fail to do so for their country when it really matters? King can handle himself just fine, whether it's rolling out of Faces nightclub or sticking Drogba in his pocket for 90 minutes - he can out perform most even if his knee is held together by blue-tac. Whether he trains or not is neither here or there. Except that it probably does mean playing for England is a broken dream. Yet, Upson still felt the need to railroad our Ledley via the red tops. Such is the concern of the young lad that he'll fall even further behind in the pecking order.

Culture of the squad, it appears, is to look after ones own agenda.

Ledley crowned King of England.....long live the King?

Tuesday afternoon round-up of the past weeks highlights.

Spiffing weekend with the win against Chelsea. Feet firmly back on the ground, right? I say that because even I got a little giddy with our victory. It amuses me that the tables have turned a little in our advantage. The little club from West London, with history you can trace back a couple of years, don't much fancy playing us. Suddenly we are flirting with the possibility of Europe, which appears to be winking in our direction and playfully lifting her skirt up, teasing us with her continental cheek. This has got some Spurs fans trembling at the knees with excitement. And this is the exact reason why other fans hate us. Far too emotional for our own good. A month or so back, relegation was still a word people shared in worried conversations, scared to ask where the next three points might come from. A week in football is a long time blah blah blah.

It's great that the players have finally settled and we are playing with confidence. And it's equally great that such is the non-event in the way of difference between a team just above the bottom three and one just below 7th spot in the table, that we can go from relegation fodder to potential Europa glory in the space of two games. No point on dwelling on what could have been had we picked up more points in the opening eight games (refer to Harry Redknapp for further analysis on this). I'm happy with anything above 10th. And if we did qualify for the soon to be revised version of the UEFA Cup, I don't believe it would be a distraction to getting it right in the Prem (which should be the overwhelming priority next season). Sure, we can kiss goodbye again to Saturday 3pm kick-offs, but considering how weak the opposition teams appear to be in the early rounds of the competition, we could use it to blood some youth players and reserves. Never say no to Europe. Time they gave the competition an extra twist. Winners qualify for the Champions League. Considering there are more runners-up and 3rd, 4th placed teams than actual champions, I don't see what harm it would. Apart from making the rich richer.

Still unbeaten against the Sky Sports Top 4 this season in the Prem. Only defeats (overall) coming in both Cups against Man Utd. Villa (who spent some time in 4th place) also beat us at the Lane. Strange old season. All that's left is for Robbie Keane to score a last minute winner in front of the Kop on the final day of the season, handing Man Utd the title. Can he play in that game? Someone mentioned how the FA will not allow it due to 'conflicting interest' (being the fact that he can pick up a winners medal due to appearance made for Liverpool, if the Reds win the league). Cant believe he would be interested in doing so considering his experience up there.

Aaron Lennon has signed an extension. I touched on this briefly in the match review for the Chelsea game. The fact he has signed on for a further two years and has stated he is happy at the club means exactly that, and there is no conceivable way for him to leave the club this summer, regardless of any possible £20M bids from Rafa or anyone else. From a business sense, it's obvious that the extension means if the player is sold then we can get more money for him. From a football perspective, he has extended his contract which means he does not want to leave the club. Which means that the club must laugh in the direction of anyone who comes knocking. There is no Robbie Keane or Michael Carrick reasoning on Aaron being sold this summer or the next. Memo to Levy. The door isn't just closed. It's double locked.

Same applies with Modric.

Congrats also to Aaron on his England call-up. Well deserved. Sparkling form, the type that makes him undroppable for Spurs. The more he develops the more unplayable he'll be for the opposition. Good news for us. Good news for the 3 Lions.

Talking of business sense, we've announced record figures for the six months ending on the 31st December 2008 (so that doesn't include the outgoings in the Jan transfer window). Levy via the official site:

"In a period of global economic recession this is a considerable achievement and we acknowledge that both the strength of our business and the fantastic loyalty shown by our supporters have helped ensure that these results have not been materially affected. We have benefited from having a robust business that is well financed and has continued to be able to support investment in the first team."

Yes, all very good. Well done. But this doesn't exactly turn me on. It's grand that in these days of debt-ridden football clubs we are in very healthy nick. We'd be even richer if we didn't spunk our money on players with inflated transfer values. So arguably, as strong as we are off it, we haven't been equally strong on it. But that has more to do with the people employed by Levy than it has to do with him directly, although he is still responsible. I'm not attempting to dig for the sake of it, but considering how much the club charges for tickets, it's no bleeding surprise we're so strong financially. We have a loyal fan base and regardless of the recession the country is going through, we don't appear to be turning our backs on the club as fans. So as long as the new stadium plans push ahead and we double our capacity, we'll be even richer. Which means even more money to spend (waste) on players we don't need. I guess my point is, when you are running a club like Spurs there is no excuse for running it into the ground.

What Scholar did was criminal, and what happened at Leeds, laughable. My criticism of Levy has always been the way he appears to confuse business decisions with ones of a footballing nature. Decent figures for sure, that won't look as bright when you subtract the transfer deals and the money spent on other ventures that will benefit the club in the long run (i.e the training ground facility). Merchandising is also down (I guess the irony in buying a Spurs mug is too much for some in the current climate) leaving Sky TV revenue and season ticket sales the only constant any club can rely on.

Consistenty ON the pitch is now required, so all the smart accountancy can support the only real progression fans care about.

Nice to see Adel and Gio doing well at their respective clubs (on loan) in the Championship. Adel, notching a winning goal for QPR over the weekend, is getting rave reviews for his quick feet and clever play. Has to be part of our squad for next season. Gio is also a player that the club should hold onto. If anything because getting rid of him before he has had the chance to prove himself at Spurs in the Prem is harsh. But when you compare Adel's comments about wanting to return to Spurs to prove himself to Gio's who is far more ambiguous in where his future lies - you wonder if a decision has already been made on the latters future.

Hutton is on the way back. Looked good in his warm-up, which took place outside a pub with his dad.

King for England? Harry is furious. I can understand why. On paper you'd have to be concerned as a Spurs fan if King plays a part for England on the pitch. It would probably mean he can't play for Spurs the following week. Not sure what Capello wants out of this. If he took King to a major tournament, would he be there to cover? And if he did, it would still be a case of waiting for his knee to lose the swelling. Maybe I'm biased, but why Woodgate isn't in the squad as an alternative to Terry and Ferdinand is a complete mystery to me. As for King, if it wasn't for his dodgy knee he'd be number one choice. Brilliant player who deserves an international career, but will never have one of any real substance. Personally, I think having him part of the England squad is nice recognition to what he has achieved as a player who has 'retired' from full training. But if there is a chance he will play, Ledders will have to consider the risks. Spurs has to be his priority. Being his bread and butter. Which is probably the reason Harry is a little pissed off.

But alas, it's over before it's began and King is back at Spurs to continue his 'individual training programme'. So he won't be taking part in the friendly on Saturday. And will probably never be called up again. What England's medical staff and Fabio thought they could do with the lad is anyones guess considering how well known his problems with fitness are.

England can live without him. We can't.

Two Lions

Great to see England finding a decent stride in their qualifying group. 4 wins on the trot. Rooney on fire. Even our U-21's are doing the business, with Huddlestone and O'Hara instrumental, helping to get us past Wales. All-action Hudd managing to score from a free-kick and get sent off. Whether either ever make the grade to the first team (England) proper is altogether another thing (which you can file under 'hardly bloody likely').

As for our reserves, with Taarabt, frustratingly good one second, inexperienced imp the next and Bostock smacking the goals in for the academy - I'd like to think we'll make some use of the 7 subs on the bench rule to blood some of forgotten Spurs kids.

All this on the assumption that if they're good enough then they should play a part. But are they anywhere near good enough and is selecting them for a team thats struggling the wrong time to do so?

Bostock is three years younger than Hoddle was when he made his debut for Spurs (in another desperate season from our past). Taarabt is possibly the wrong type of player required at the moment. In fact, talking about the youth players as options is as desperate as hoping Ghaly might make a return to the squad. We need our experienced costly players to finally show their class.

Huddlestone and O'Hara on will probably be involved this weekend - unless Ramos prefers Zokora in the middle. O'Hara, would give us some much needed bite compared to Zokora who will just run around without any end product. Hudd is likely to be an impact sub if he plays any part.

If we ever start winning games again then maybe the likes of Bostock and Taarabt will be given an opportunity but the general form of the first team regulars and their attempts to reclaim some confidence and class is a tad more important.

Boo who?

Ashley Cole, last Saturday, was booed by England fans due a howler that presented Kazakhstan with their single goal in their 5-1 defeat. Some people (the deluded cretins on Sky’s Football Supplement) would have you believe that the reason was due to most of Wembley’s crowd being made up of Spurs and Arsenal fans. Yes, the journalists of England are truly champions of the truth gently stabbing you in the back of the head with their truthness fork.

Cole is, at a basic fundamentally level, a personification of the modern game. Arrogant, greedy and a cheat. The very epitome. Any other England player would not have got that level of abuse for a single mistake (especially in a game we won so comfortably), but Ashley is a special case.

You might argue that a minority booed, and the majority actually tried to drown out the booing with cheers. And that the people who did boo are not ‘proper fans’ but day trippers who see football as a pantomime rather than what it should be (in its purest traditional form). Anyone else would not have been on the receiving end of the booing and its harsh. But the media shouldn’t be making it back page news. They should save it for when we lose a game due to a howler and then crucify the player who is considered at fault (as long as that player is not a Big Four© player).

The dream is over

Can’t say I’m shocked. One point from two games would have been enough, and yet somehow we manage to lose the lot. At least McClaren is gone. And hopefully inept tactics and selections are gone with him. Though with the FA’s track record, I wouldn’t be that shocked to see Harry Redknapp at the helm. It’s grim. No European Championships next summer. May as well enter the Big Brother house.

Robinson must have had a chuckle to himself, watching the Carson Calamity show. Sol Campbell showed just how brave he is, moving out of the way for the Croat to blast the third (and winning goal) in. And the world sat back and laughed at the fact that if we lose Owen and Rooney, we have Bent and Defoe as backup. Portugal haven’t got any strikers either, yet they managed to limp their way to the finals.

McClaren told everyone yesterday ‘blame me’. King of the blatant that Steve is. Big Sam doesn’t want the job, thank God. Jose has said forget about it. Martin O’Neil is being mentioned by some, whereas others suggest England will wait until after Euro 2008 to make their appointment (Hiddink?).

Whoever comes in better buck the trend and stop selecting players based on reputation only. But when have the FA ever got it right?

And onto the weekend. West Ham away on Sunday. They have injury problems. We are generally shit, but not as shit as we were a month or so back. No idea how to call this one. Losing to them will no doubt add another page to their history books. Winning for us will just be three points on the table.

Lennon

Twisted knee has ruled Lennon out of the England squad and wont take part against Brazil and Estonia. Blessing in disguise. The young lad is burnt out and needs a full summers rest so that he can be fit again to go out on the pull with Huddlestone and the rest of his Bling Squad.