We. Made. A. Mistake.
Thursday, April 1, 2010 at 11:08AM It's time to come clean. All of us. We need to stand under the shower of truth and allow the cleansing water to wash away the filthy lies and delusions from our bodies. The stench has become unbearable. We have walked the streets alone far too long, pretending and fooling ourselves that the empire of dust we worship has the foundations to aid us in reaching the heavens. Our faith, corrupted. Our hopes evaporated. The dust, blown away by the wind.
All this time, we whispered words that had no meaning. And now, these words, no longer twisted, stare back at us, taunting, as clear as the sun in the sky on a summers day. And there is nowhere to run to escape the chants.
We. Were. Wrong.
We. Made. A. Mistake.
He's. Better. Than. Sandra.
We should never have sold him.
Saturday 3rd April. The Stadium of Light. 3pm Kick-off. Sunderland v Tottenham Hotspur.
A team of Spurs rejects, led by another reject. Darren Bent. 21 goals. Goal machine. Defoe? Take away the five he scored against Wigan and he's lagging embarrassingly behind. Bent a reject? I think not. A man on a mission. Focused. Able to adapt to his surroundings and make it work in his favour. Who else can cunningly use a beach-ball to trick an opposition keeper? Defoe is nothing more than a loyal friend of the offside flag.
We took £10M+ for Bent and gave him away to Sunderland. Just because he shared his soul via Twitter. That's like paying a hit man tuppence to shoot you in the face twice (he might miss the first time round). Twelve yards requires a sniper rifle. Point blank, and he'll find his target.
Another nail in the Champions League coffin. Hammered into place by the hands of Daniel Levy, guided by the screams of Harry Redknapp.
There used to be a football club here.
Reader Comments (73)
I concur.
you joke but you know it'll happen. We're all focused on the "Big3" games and the players will be too. This Saturday is the biggest game of our season so far, at least until next Saturday's game and then the Wednesday after etc. COYS
Bent suits their style of but their style of play will not take them up to the hights we aspire to. Simples!
Defoe might not have a beach ball. But he has Roman. And Roman is more bubbly than a bouncing ball. Although I think the ball speaks better English.
I'm bricking it. You just know they're going to make it difficult for us.
Do I detect a touch of nervousness in the joke? Well I do in myself. The team has got a job on their hands! But, anyway, isn't Sandra coming back from Brasil for next season??!!??
I would love to see that gormless expression he does again (reminds me of Grover from Sesame St) when he misses another sitter like God swooped down and swapped his right leg with a chicken drumstick.
I am however bricking it and thinking we're gonna lose.....BUT, even if we do it aint all over yet. All and none of the games are important....it's the points at the end that matter so I hope we're not too downhearted if we come away with nothing....we've had worst setbacks afterall!
See all those rued lost points at home against the 'lesser' sides.
Question though for anyone who knows.....
Now Bent has scored over 20 this year, would any add-ons come into play??????????
couldnt disagree more. We were right to sell him. Yes he scores goals, Im not quite sure how, but i cant deny he does. But the rest of his play isnt up to the mark. Sunderland are his level. the top 4 would never come in for him so why should we have him?? Same with England.
HE ISNT GOOD ENOUGH !!! Come on, be honest, you'd have defoe over bent every time. He just doesnt fit with any partner either. We made the right decision and its good he is scoring, it pushes his price up which was based on performance. So good for him, good for us. No doubt he'll score against us on saturday, but i would never take him back.
I agree with gorgeousGeorge... Bent is a good finisher, but he cant play football and therefore doesn't fit into a footballing side like us
April Fools?
Old skool Spooky
One the plus side - looks like the Goons have lost Fabregas and Arshavin for at least 3 weeks..... ruling them out of the NLD on 14th April.
Gorgeousgeorge is spot on. He didn't suit Spurs style of play and wasn't the perfect foil for Defoe, unlike Crouch and Pav. He's an excellent striker but he needs a lot of chances to score, something you don't get at the top end of the table.
Bent could never handle the pressure of playing for Spurs.
He's a big fish little pond player. He's great as the main man in a team. The big cheese and main striker of a team (as evidenced by his time at Charlton and now Sunderland)
At Spurs he was NEVER going to succeed due to who's footsteps he had to follow in and what we were trying to achieve. At Spurs he was just a fish in the ocean.
Good luck to him at Sunderland (not this weekend obviously)
We play against a team of rejects!! I hope Bent pulls a muscle tweeting over the weekend...must get three points!! COYS
Are you kidding me? Darren Bent didn't suit our style of play because he can't control the ball and can't bring other players into play. You're seriously saying that if we had Darren Bent we'd be doing a lot better this season? You are totally clueless!
I was happy to see the back of bent - never has a player marked an opposition centre back so well!
Steeeeeeed - why we got rid of him I'll never understand
Don't be so melodramatic. Yes, Bent can score goals. We all knew that when we bought him from Charlton. Trouble is, he scores goals in average teams and doesn't fit our style of play. As long as Sunderland play like they did against Liverpool, it shouldn't matter if Bent scores because we'll score far more...
Hmmmmm, I am assuming that is irony?
DB imho has scored goals at Sunderland because as far as they are concerned he is pretty much the only target. In a rounded team he was proved lacking. He has no versatility and lacks the ability to keep his cool when it is not going 100%. Plus his attitude sucks big hairy donkey balls. he got found out when he came to us.
Has defoe not been injured quite a bit this season so 27 goals is pretty good i would think
We'll beat Sunderland by 2 goals 1-3
It's pretty hard not to score goals when the other 10 guys on your team are committed to lobbing balls up front for you to run on to.
With 20 of Sunderland's 28 goals coming from Sandra's understudy, it's obvious that Sunderland's philosophy of play is "wait until Bent gets in front of the net and try to bounce the ball of his his shin or sommat"
its gone midday - come clean now please spooks
Very dark Spooky
Any good away team boozers in Sunderland?
April Fools joke or simply sarcastic. Either way, me laughing!
Bent is injured according to Sunderland's website:
http://www.safc.com/page/LatestNewsIndex/0,,10281,00.html
Ha!
I thought at first this was gonna be about Gio.
sounds like you are bricking it Spooky?
Come on you spurs, keep the run going right through till the end. Great news that Dawson is back and not injured.
COYS.
You're right. We never should have let him go. He was such an articulate spokesman for the team and a real leader on the pitch and in the changing room. Although it is his goal scoring grace and finesse that I will miss the most, such accurate shins.
And what if we do make it to the CL and draw Sevilla? We'll have to face Zokora.
No way a mistake. The mistake was buying him in the first place. His goalscoring has no relation to how well the team does. Look at Sunderland - they were in relegation trouble, yet he was still near the top of the goal scorers charts. Similarly at Charlton. He is one of the top English scorers, yet no where near the England team. This says a lot. I know I am saying this before we play them, but he DOES score, but I believe at the expense of his strike partner - Kenwynne Jones is having a disappointing season - and the rest of the team. Bent also demands to play every game - this is how he scores so many. Spurs do not need that sort of player - we already have Defoe - who is of a similar ilk - one is enough. Don't get me wrong, the guy can do a job, but not at the level that we are trying to achieve. Mind you, Man U said the same about Tevez and now look at him go.
I am now injured and must say that now that I will be out for a while, Spurs will finish 3rd this year because the rest of my teammates are crap. With the exception of Bendtner of course.
No Ashavin would mean Bale vs Walcott,
I think I just came.
i think it speaks volumes about bent that he scored a hatful of goals at charlton and sunderland without these teams ever really looking close to winning anything of note. Like I've always said, the guy can find the back of the net but his overall play and contribution to the team is woeful, and this makes the side suffer. It's all very well scoring 20 goals a season but when most of those are in 2-1 or 3-1 defeats then it really doesn't matter a jot. Stats aren't everything, even when it comes to goals.
Has Harry fucking Hotspur started guest writing for you Spooks?
Happy April 1st. It's pleasing to see that the average Yid doesn't chomp as hard as these mongs:
http://thegamesgonecrazy.blogspot.com/2010/04/west-ham-to-ground-share-new-tottenham.html
You'd think they keep track of what the date is, to see when their giros are due.
I read that April Fools gags officially end at Midday.... This one keeps going.... Perhaps Fabregas' injury was an extremely early April fools gag - he'll turn up next game.... Certainly back in time to face us....
Arsenal fans at work appear to be proud of their team.
Am I missing something?
Have to say Spooky, the prose of an Oxford English Professor but with the same level of common sense.
Of course Bent will score against us, but we will score more because we are a better team.
Everybody's happy!
PS: OK, so it was probably irony..
All out for a win, no ifs no buts..........we have to go for the win!!!! It make or break, boom or bust!!!
shut up dude! wot r u chatting about?
Darren Bent, being prised by Spurs fans !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY APRIL FOOLS.................
Sunderland have been fighting relegatrion all season. He scores but the team suffers.
The sheer number of people who didn't get the sarcasm is alarming.
Okay guys no need to get bent out of shape. It's april 1st
Up next: Stalteri and Gilberto we are powerless with out you, do stay in touch!
Steffan freund would score as many as bent if we'd stuck him up front and lumped balls at him all day.
Nice April Fool Spooky.
I'm going to the game Saturday and will be the one singing the loudest.
COYFS!!!
Bent may be scoring goals but that was never an issue when he was at Spurs. The problem was he was crap for the 89:56 that he wasn't scoring a goal.
His movement, touch, passing, vision, etc. were and are still shit.
Spurs are a better side without him in it and Sunderland are 13th. Who cares if he scores goals if the cost of those goals is the fluidity and cohesiveness of Spurs.
Fuck him.
For goodness sake. He didnt suit our setup. Pav is doing well. Statistically far better than Bent. And for all the goals, Sunderland let in a few. I was glad to see him go. £16M is a lot of cash bearing in mind the values on Keane, Pav, Defoe and Crouch. I far prefer the balance in our squad now.