'Messi to Spurs' because I read it on the internet, innit
Wednesday, May 13, 2009 at 5:32PM Someone asked me what happens to football bloggers in the quiet summer months. I answered, 'Quiet? Are you f*cking kidding me?' Once the transfer window opens, it's a little like the finale to Buffy the Vampire Slayer when Sunnydale is obliterated by a hellmouth.
And ground zero for our particular summer transfer hellmouth is the internet.
Once the tabloids exhaust all their football agent information they look towards the various message boards and copy and paste any in the know stories they deem worthy of the back pages…i.e. all of them. You'll be surprised how many message board threads end up on the Sky Sports ticker as 'exclusives'.
We've already been linked to Muntari, Upson, Cisse, Tevez, Ballack and Drogba (I kid you not), Cruz along with rehashes of Jones and Downing. And that's just a quick overview. Add to them the various continental players that have cited Spurs as a possible destination and you're just getting started. And it's still May. But all of these are your bog standard examples.
The In the Knows have yet to awake from their winter slumber.
We all know (bullshit radar on full pelt) that most of the players mentioned above (about 97% of them) are not genuine targets. Agents and players are in the habit of using our name just to put themselves out there. Others are just desperate for any kind of media coverage to get their current club to offer them a better deal. Others are simply delusional (yes, that's you Cisse, you fruitcake). The 3% are probable targets in the way that logically we could see them in a Lilywhite shirt because they fit the profile - i.e. affordable, required, Spurs type signing.
Others are likely because they fit Harry Redknapp's transfer target profile. Which might or might not be a good thing. Though he did strike gold with Wilson.
I got a lot of stick several months back for 'having a go' at the In The Know culture that exists and the quite prominent grapevine of whispers that many of us our privy to by simply being a member of any given Spurs forum. ITK's are people who are, well, obviously in the know. Whether its because they know people at the club or know people who know people or have some other deep throat connection that results with information about a possible transfer being shared online.
Now and again, some strike gold with their information. It's rare, and equally interesting how other signings come out of the blue and are never picked up by the very same people who would have you believe Kuyt (we ended up with Berbatov) or Torres (like this was ever on the cards) is about to sign. You'll always spot a bit of ITK info as they usually sign off with 'take it or leave it' or 'believe it if you want to' and talk in percentages (i.e. He's on his way, deal is about 87% done, likely to happen but you never know, might be a last minute glitch, wants more money than we've offered, but looking good).
It's a 'don’t shoot the messenger' ethos they live and die by. Although some do take it far too seriously. Not that they are always solely responsible for the info as sometimes they are simply passing on something that has been given to them. The problem is that there is no way of knowing whether the info has been dressed up or has been given to the ITK as a joke/dis-information.
True ITK's, you'd think, would not want to share any information, for reasons as to avoid placing the deal at risk and being discovered by other possible would-be-interested clubs.
People who spot a player arriving or leaving the Spurs training ground is altogether a different kettle of fish. That's not really ITK, is it? If you see someone out and about. Then at that point it's not really something that the club are trying to keep under wraps.
Guess this where the necessity to know something before everyone else drives people to extreme measures to get hold of said information (climb trees overlooking the Lodge) that might suggest who is about to sign for us. Even though it wont change the fact that said player may well sign. Is there a difference between knowing something 24 hours before it happens and just waiting for it to happen?
I guess, what is far more interesting is transfer deals that fail and the reasons behind the failure (remember the epic 'Diego' tug of war with Santos?). The Duff saga is a perfect example of when ITK info is far more interesting, although there is nothing to suggest any of it is ITK. Anyone could have told you he signed for Newcastle for the money.
I offended one or two people several months back because I criticised the culture (some people who dare to be critical of ITK people are banned from forums). I'm not going to stir up trouble again. I do think the obsession with some ITK's who post cryptic messages that could be translated to mean absolutely anything is tragic. But do agree that the information is there…take it or leave it. Take it seriously or don't. It's probably on par with anything you read in the tabloids anyway. And like I said, sometimes, one in two hundred, get it right.
Any ITK info posted on this blog during the summer months will be credited to the originator and will only be posted if the original 'rumour' was posted in the public domain. Anything that’s privately shared will stay that way. Wouldn't want another fatwā issued my way.
So, hold onto your hats, and expect to drown in a flurry of sightings and medicals and morning press conferences.
Here's to signing the new Zidane. That's Zidane, not Zokora. Thank you very much.
Can you tell I'm far more mellow with all this now?
Reader Comments (10)
I got banned from COS for debating the validity of the ITKs
Never mind
I'm more chilled about it now too, although I happen to think almost all of it is made up, or incorrect
I think the club might even give our false leads. How many of the actual deals that happened were genuinely flagged? Bentley's about it
It's good fun though isn't it because usually you tend to hope and pray the info is real. Especially when the player linked is world class.
Modric came out of nowhere I think. Not sure I read any I.T.K. gossip prior to the club announcing it.
i agree with what you say about some ITK's. I've never really claimed to be 'an ITK' but i've posted the odd bit of info i've been told by reliable sources (to this date i've only been told 2 bits of info that didn't come into fruition), and i'll probably do that again this summer. I have no real reason to keep the knowledge to myself, providing the source remains confidential, and I'm not doing it to boast my cryptic skills or to look important, simply because i use forums/blogs and like to pass on info i have! i don't have a daily contact or anything, i just know a few people who will occasionally (normally when they've had a little to drink) let me in on something, and i'll pass that on.
ridiculous that people get banned for criticising blatently wrong info though (arshavin has 100% signed etc).
I think ITK’s fall into four categories:
1) People who know people i.e. when the information is posted its because it comes from a third or more hand source and like all Chinese whispers, moves on apace.
2) Wishful thinking posted as ITK i.e. You want Torres at Spurs, you hear he’s for sale. Ipso facto Spurs are going to buy him, this of course ignores the fact that he might want to play for someone in the champions league or will be challenging for the title, for sure. I think most of these are teenagers, but of course the lazy hacks who then perpetuate these stories don’t know that, come to that neither do we as we ramp it up.
3) People who believe that what they are being told by an uninformed source.
4) Malicious people who pose as Spurs fans, I think there are many of these trolls scattered on our boards. How many people do you find who said they hoped we would lose to Villa to help the scum??? We were in deep, deep do-do three points? I would have been grateful for one. Spurs fans hmm All those people who are hyper critical all the time and say they never go.
Last year I kept a list of all the players we were connected to from every source I could find I gave up at 48. I’ve got over 20 so far this year. I can but hope as can we all
Nice piece. I wrote a similar thing about the transfer window on my blog back in January... Gotta love/hate ITK! :D
http://eddiesfootballblog.wordpress.com/2009/01/17/rumourville-dont-believe-the-hype/
Like the Buffy analogy between Sunnydale armageddon and the summer months at Spurs. It seems like a constant battle between good and evil... The News Corps rumour-mill and the truth.
Spooky don't be stirring this old chestnut up again ;)
I find the most amusing ones are those that claim we are buying player x and y then feel the need to demonstrate the exact formation and positions 'Arry is going to play them in.
Straight from Championship manager '09
I am an ITK (In the Krap) and I can tell you for sure that we have already brought Iniesta, Messi and Bojan.
Let this be a warning to you Spooky, if you disagree with me I will ban you from your own site!!!!!!
Ha Ha the Keyboard Warrior strikes again
Spooky,
Most of these ITK stories fall into 4 categories;
1. Lazy hacks with vivid imaginations filling news space.
2. Agents pimping their clients around like King's Cross crack-whores.
3. Lame bloggers trying to gain advertising revenue.
4. Walter Mitty characters living in dreamworlds.
By the way, my man Joey is available for a packet of tabs and a large doner. Excellent man to watch Ledley's back in a tussle with bouncers.