Worms of disillusion
Thursday, May 31, 2012 at 10:40PM
Dear Mr Levy,
What has become of us? After years of restraining orders and home invasions, I find myself somewhat isolated. On this occasion I am not outside your mansion hiding in the shrubbery, neither am I following you on one of your jaunts to the local supermarket or using my night vision goggles to watch your wife shower. No. I'm sat at home in front of my pc monitor and I type this without threat of a legal violation that a judge might frown upon. I do this not because I am weak or have surrendered the fight. How many times can a man protest in the same way before he becomes a monument to himself?
Do not misunderstand me. If I so wish to claim back old traditions I will be more than comfortable to strip naked save for a bagel to hide my blushes, and proceed to handcuff myself to a turnstile in protest. I still have that in me. Why only yesterday I waterboarded Chirpy. Why? Simply because I could. But still, here I am. At peace. Microsoft Word and my thoughts. No rage against the machine here just gentle gesturing and an electronic cuddle. Hopefully these poignant paragraphs will entertain you or perhaps inspire confidence in some way.
I had grand plans to anger up the blood and lay waste to the catastrophic season that we have only just left behind. I could so easily rape and pillage my way through 20k words of ranting, spewing vengeance and disparaging rhetoric with my contempt and disdain subtly shining through the cracks of the wall you will attempt to build in defence as I come charging towards you. But what would that achieve exactly? So rather than just point the finger and once more highlight where you’ve gone wrong I’m going to attempt to add a more positive spin to it. I’m offering you a solution to the problem at hand. From one Tottenham fan to another Tottenham fan.
Harry Redknapp. We appear to be stuck with him for another season. No compensation is forthcoming as the England job has long since passed. So if he left now you’d have to fork out the less enticing ilk of compensation, the one that goes the opposite direction from your wallet. Next season’s success is dependent on what we do in the transfer window before it closes. Between now and then we’ll know if we’ll be able to sustain another challenge. Considering we need a number of players to come in and a few to go out, that’s a monumental amount of business that needs doing in the space of three months. No dithering or indecisiveness can be part of this process. Agreed?
The problem with Redknapp is that he’s short term. Even though he has been with us a number of seasons it feels like we are reacting to each new season as if it’s the first we’ve had under him. There is no longevity in our plans. This is best illustrated by the lack of money spent in the transfer market for arguably key positions. Theorise away what might have happened had we bolstered the squad with top drawer quality rather than older bit-part squad players. But then you might have been saving up the war chest for when Redknapp walked. Which he hasn’t done. So, are we left not speculating for another season or do you take the initiative and sign players that the next manager can easily work with? Or do we continue to pluck away using the prior template that involves the both of you not seeing eye to eye on potential signings?
The other issue with Redknapp is that he’s reactive to whatever is happening at any given time, adapting his soundbites to fit into whatever position we happen to be in. Contenders, title contenders, top three, top four, fifth etc. There are more contradictions and hypocrisy to be found with our manager than there is with any politician. It’s like having a captain of a ship pretending to guide his crew to a far gone land, except when he looks down all he sees is a broken compass.
“If we keep going that way, we’ll hit land soon enough”
Blag. Hope. No drilled hard thought strategy. We've got a ship, we've got a crew, that's all you need to sail right? If we sink, that's not the captains fault. It's because we're Tottenham and we always sink. The blame firmly detached from the captain because the vessel is jinxed and has struggled to brave the waters in the past. Blame the owner that supplied the ship and the people back home wishing them luck on their voyage. It's their fault for desiring new land to be discovered and conquered.
We want Francis Drake. We've got Captain Birdseye.
That’s not to say he hasn’t done good. Redknapp that is (Birdseye has done wonders for my dinners). It’s not to say he isn’t a good manager. Look at the clubs above us, the money they have and the amount of years of experience they all share being in the same competitive positions year after year. Do we honestly think this is an easy achievement to be had? But then if the captain took a little more time to plan things out, fix the compass and navigate around the storms...
...then again, is that a pirate flag I see hoisted?
Fact remains, Redknapp has to be backed and be told clearly the objectives the club has, that’s your responsibility Mr Chairman. If he stays, there's no point everyone saying he's not committed if we're equally not committed. If it means we have to work with the short term ethics of Redknapp then back him in the short term by landing long term players that will outlive his managerial appointment and throw in a cheap signing, the type he likes to make to keep him happy. He doesn’t have a choice in the matter, make that so, if he doesn’t like it he can walk.
The stats don’t lie. During your tenure, has there been a more successful Spurs manager? In recent memory has there been one blessed with such a solid graceful squad of players? Have we played with such swashbuckle and assurance in the past decade as we do now? There will be no court case next season. No debate about England. Hopefully no heart palpitations other than the ones in the stands. So another season might prove to be the very best this manager can offer us, especially after so many harsh lessons learnt this past term. It might even give him the right amount of fire in his belly to once more prove people wrong. If it's better than 4th spot, then we're hardly going to complain. Unlike now. We're complaining now. It's strange, all these seasons in midtable, and we're...I can't wrap my head around what I'm meant to be feeling. Am I disappointed or not? Are we under-achieving? If so, compared to what? To the past or the immediate past we carved out from playing so well? Isn't this as good as we've ever had it? Isn't that enough..?
You need to...you need to...give him another chance. Yes...another...another...No...No...FFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
F*** this.
Who the f*** am I kidding here? I can’t do this.
GET RID OF THE CLOWN AND GET RID OF HIM NOW! We’re a shambles! Look it up in the dictionary. Shambles, picture of Tottenham being shambolic. It's what we are! We could have won the league man, the league! Yet we watched it disappear in a blink of an eye because our striker wasn’t born an inch taller! Who makes this s*** up? We gain a 10 point lead then we lose it, then we get ourselves back into a position where it’s in our hands and we choke up again. To add insult to injury an ex-player lets in three soft goals and Chelsea (the club Redknapp wanted to see beat Barcelona) win the Champions League final and we’re left looking into the abyss that is the summer wondering if Modric is going to be sold and whether we’re going to take the entirety of the three months to flirt with the idea of signing someone before giving Jenas a one year extension on his contract. I won't even go anywhere near the capitulation at the swamp.
I’m sick of this nightmare! Why can't I wake up man? Why can't I wake up? Am I awake or asleep? If I'm awake I want to sleep. If I'm dreaming I don't want to risk reality being worse than this so I'd prefer to have dreamless sleep. A coma. Do people dream in comas? How about if I'm knocked unconscious. Will I dream if I'm knocked out? Someone please knock me out!
I can’t take this pressure any more. Just sell Modric for £40M. Sell Bale for £40M. That’s £80M right there. Luka doesn’t score goals so what exactly is the point in using him as some form of statement of intent that we won’t be bullied into selling our ‘best players’. Defoe has been engaged more times that Luka has found the net, ffs. The bloke is over-rated. His image rights are hardly worth a thing. Take a look at him! Who cuts his hair? A DeLorean with keys to a 1970s barber shop?
“Oh look I’m Luka and when I get the ball I turn and pass it out to another player”
Amazing. We’re building our team around a player than can pass a ball that doesn't even want to be here. Astonishing stuff. What next? Loan a player that can kick a ball really hard and fast towards goal? Maybe in ten years time we'll buy us one of them. Or we just wait for Harry Kane to turn thirty.
£40M for someone who can recycle possession. Other clubs must be green with envy. I blame him for not qualifying for the Champions League.
As for Gareth. Well, he’s finished. His ego has consumed his talent. He had that one decent game in Milan and that was that. He thinks he’s Ronaldo, have you seen that? Have you seen him do his Ronaldo impression? You know, the copyrighted move where he sort of floats away from the left and roams into the middle and into space? No other player does that. That’s a blatant trademark infringement and to be frank this also cost us Champions League. Had he stayed on the left in every single game played we’d have finished 3rd or better, what with all the crosses he would have supplied for our forward line attacking the box with intent. Such wasted intent.
Who else? Adebayor. He can’t trap or control a ball, his first touch is awful. In a match he might control the ball say 25 times but the 3 times he doesn’t? Christ, he hasn’t got a clue! It’s in those 3 occasions where he fails that's where we lose the game. Who cares about the goals he does score and the assists he gets. He doesn't always quite control the ball! He’s as responsible as Bale and Luka is for our failure. And he’s your failure, a testament to not splashing out the money for a long term forward.
And he’s a gooner. So is Gallas. Two key players in key positions both accountable and yet we wonder why we fail when we have players that do not have Lilywhite blood. The ones we do have in Lilywhite are not good enough when the team is failing. When we're doing well it's because that's how we're meant to be doing and if we're blipping it's because neither of you know what you're doing. I know these things, I read Twitter, so many unified voices can't be wrong. You're meant to do the opposite of what you do when you get it wrong before you get it wrong so you don't get it it wrong but get it right. Why can't you embrace hindsight once in a while?
And God forbid you spend that potential £80M on any new young world class players. How about you stick it into the NDP fund and we can sit back for another ten years whilst you and Haringey tickle each other’s bums. We’ve got no strikers, did you notice that? You’re going to sign a Belgian centre-back that nobody has ever seen play aside from You Tube clips but everyone is desperate to see signed just because he’s got a fancy name and isn't bad looking. In the mean time, David Bentley and Gio dos Santos are still star-jumping their way around the club earning thousands for what exactly? Fringe players? I’m going to try that at work, being a fringe player.
“Hi boss. What? No, no. I’m not going to do much work today. Perhaps an hour or so, nothing spectacular. I’m sure you’ll be disappointed with my output. I’m now going outside for a smoke, I’ll be six hours”
Money you do spend is spent on the likes of Pienaar and Khumalo for the sake of selling a few shirts in South Africa to cover the cost of importing prime meat into the club for the executive box five course meals. Does Khumalo actually exist? I tried to scan an image of his face with that Autonomy software thing but got nothing back from it. I claim he is nothing but a PR marketing ploy created by an out-sourced graphic designer to give the illusion of profit being spent on players. One for the future, right? Sure, whatever, maybe this will also be the year Jenas finally comes of age.
You are ruining our chances by hiding behind this fallacy of being a great chairman just because we compete on accountancy when our revenue and capacity is so much lower than so many other clubs. Stop hiding behind circumstance of stature. Why haven’t you sacked Redknapp for showing fragmented loyalty and disrespect? Why do you continue to employee a mascot that has a crack problem and deals in the stands on match-days?
When Redknapp does get his way, he signs Parker. Then proceeds to play him in every single game. Do you know why he burnt out towards the end of the season? Redknapp had him doing odd jobs all over the place. Chauffeuring to and from Sandbanks. Painting and decorating. Landscape gardening. Doesn't stop working that Parker, great work ethic, but Christ...give the man a rest!
King? Deadwood.
And as for Harry Redknapp himself, again I ask, why has a man that persists in palming off responsibility onto you still receive monthly pay cheques for his services? You’re paying him to blame you for everything that goes wrong. I’m not even sure Redknapp actually works for Spurs. I think he just turns up at training, walks around a bit on the touchline and then drives in and out of the car park to make it look like he’s being kept busy. He’s got Sky Sports News fooled with a simple roll down of the car window. He’s kept the façade up for so long you’ve just let it naturally play out. I'm right, aren't I? Ha! I knew it! It’s mental, utterly utterly mental.
Perhaps almost as mental as Fulop being paid off by a betting syndicate to throw the match at WBA. But that is ridiculous. We all know that is not the case. Far more likely you paid him off so that we would miss out on Champions League. My evidence? The fact that you’ve not written a letter to UEFA to attempt to force a rejuvenated precedence of complaint for them only allowing four English clubs into the competition. You losing your touch? No, never. It’s part of your game plan. Keep long suffering Spurs long suffering because it means you can counter all the cries for money to be spent with reasoned calm that we have to be fiscally careful due to loss of revenue. All softly softly slowly slowly making sure the ENIC investment isn't spunked on the risk that comes with pushing for progression. I’ve got you sussed out.
Yeah.
I lied Mr Levy. I’m not at home.
You heard me, I lied. Like you lie. We've got more in common than just our bald heads. I’m in your study, I'm using your lap top to type this letter. Earlier I used your downstairs toilet. I didn't flush. I had a curry last night. You do the math. That's right, I've broken into your house again. Screw the British justice system. I’m also naked. I'm sweating too. You'll have to have the place fumigated. Send me the bill, see if I care. Why am I naked? Because I can be. I do what I want. And yes, that's one of Chirpy's in the open pack of Chocolate Fingers. You'll work it out when you dunk it into your tea. Chicken and Earl Grey don't mix well. There's no escaping me Mr Levy.
By the way, technically speaking, I'm not actually completely naked. I'm wearing your socks. Well, one of them. You get the picture. Literally. I've sent you a text.
My blood is angered Mr Levy. Do something, prove to us you're in control.
I have to go now. Before I leave I’m going to drag my backside along the carpet like a dog does when its got worms. Because I too have worms. Worms of disillusion, eating away at this ring of fire that burns me so deep. No cream to soothe the heinous pain. Pain you have caused. We're all left scratching our backsides whilst you don't even come close to scratching the surface.
Yours betrayed once more,
Spooky
Reader Comments (50)
Sadly, as great an illusionary and delusional piece of ill-perceived monologue and diatribe as has ever been written about our club; devoid any worth other than a homage to one fans puffed up ego.
It's time you spent your efforts on something less complex and easier for you to grasp.
First time readers shouldn't be allowed to post comments.
Excellent Spooky. You've been on fire since the season came to an end.
I think my favourite article to date. Unlike the Bayern v Chelshite match, I like the second half the most. The bit about the Delorean and 70's barbershop, greaaat.
And I have been considering that same point you touched on, holding on to fringe players who are just wasting money getting paid to do nothing. I'm no mathematician and far too lazy to do the research myself but I feel as though we would lose less money if we were to just sell them off instead of just doling out the cash like crazy.
Some manic laughter after informing Lev's about the toilet would have been rather apt. Actually, manic laughter anywhere would have been great. Still the lack of it doesn't take away from.
We're stuck with Twitchy Twitcherson for another season eh? Would love him to make me eat all my words this next season as he did last season with his Parker purchase.
Dear Number 1. You're a cunt.
Spook - quality work, epic amounts of giggles here. And many moments of shared joy and rage!
brilliant
Football Agent - or FA for short - says it all really
Unfortunately Spooky theres one problem with not giving Redknapp an extension to his contract and getting him to work out his final year. He would'nt try and win anything. His interviews would be unbearable, he would toy with relegation to spite the chairman. No, if he's not being offered a new contract, then he has got to be shown the door. I'd show him the door anyway. Hes disloyal and he amply demonstrated that last season when capello took a powder. I couldn't ever trust him again after last season.
This is the "Stan" of football blogging. Great stuff.
Spooks you are a fucking genius who cares what football agent says..like most agents just money grabbing bastards!
I hope our dear chairman reads this and stops putting us through this year in year out,hats off to you Spooky .COYS
For me it was simple. Sack him STRAIGHT AWAY or offer him a new deal. As cookie says, I fear that HR will not try at all next season, we all saw what happened to his focus during the England saga, I dread to think what he will be like if he is thinking to himself that he is out of a job at the end of the season. What do we do now? personally I would offer him a new deal (1-2 years) as we have well and truely missed the boat that is Brendan Rogers, who else is about??? More bad decisions come from indecision and you have been very indecisive since our CL exit. Why is Vertonghen not wrapped up yet? sort out Leandro, these should be players that any manager would want whether HR stays or leaves, I WANT SOME FUCKING ACTION, one way or another, show that you care. After the CL final I felt like my wife just told me she has been fucking the milkman for the last 20 years, angry, dirty, cheated, gutted. If your wife told you that Daniel would you react, would you show passion,of course you would, love makes us do mental shit. I love THFC, I'm sure you do to, in your own way. SHOW IT
Not to worry guys,compared top England,the club are looking good.How can any England manager in his right mind.Pick the likes of Carroll(On only 2 decent games).Dowling and Jordon Henderson.And no,this is not a go at Liverpool.But just look at the quality of those players,they are really mediocre.So Tottenham are really quite well off,in comparison.I think Hodgson needs to visit an eye specialist.Johnson at Man City,and and the likes of Surridge,are far better technical players.England do not need luck.There only hope is for the opposition not to turn up at all.So do not despair Spurs fans,Just look at our National squad,if you really want to get depressed.
Football Agent - that bit about the sock? That was spooky spending his efforts on something less complex with something he finds easy to grasp!
Surely we`ve all gone through the rainbow of emotions outlined above in recent weeks. Not everyone is as capable of painting the picture with words.
But, just because you may not agree doesn`t mean it`s an over inflated ego talking.
Pure Genius Mr Spock, Utterly phenom artickle. The last paragraph is paraffin to my secret network of Tottenham Chav Pyromaniacs - lolGold!!
Also, -FYI MrLevy is also balling out of control here 99% neyked.... just wearing one sock.... but its not around either of my feet. You get the picture?
I know you do,
- Just like when I posed for your many portraits, before, in my LevyBatCave.. paint me another picture Spooky!! Oh shat... you already did that in my toilet pan... I appreciate the love homie.. Keep writing strongshine, moreso over this summer; will be our hardest yet. Stay strong brotherman... i heart you too.
I read every artickle - especially when I'm riding in the back of Bently. He has his uses.
Alas... Fear Not My Spock,
- I'll bring you tidings wrapped in Blue and White soon and Deadwood in a black bag. I have a masterplun and it'll be spun dammnit, i assure one, soon ma' Boy.... sooon.... each peice will fall into place (and those pieces will push Bale back over to left, to the left) and you can stalk me from a shorter distance as we'll share our mutual flirtation and toy with those who currently try to toy with us, I'll have the last laugh, I always do.... Audere est facere... this summer is ours, the fall before the leap.
Yours,
I are Daniel
Tottenham are in s very bad position as they are completey stuck. We have never been so stuck since Sticko the Stick Insect got stuck to a sticky bun. At the root of it all is Mr Daniel Levy and his fixation with balancing the books and fuck everything else. He even makes out he is bidding for players but never really is. He always always underbids but al least it looks like he is doing something and it appeases the fans, well used to. He always bids too late and there is not time to complete a transfer but it looks like he is doing something.
Tottenham right now have so many problems it's not funny anymore. We are the rest of the premier leagus laughing stock. We always promise so much yet always fall at the last hurdle. When we first made Champions League that was the time to buy some quality. What did Levy do...abosolutely fucking nothing. That wss in 2010 and we are still waiting for someone to put the ball in the net because quite frankly we have nobody to do that. Yes Adebayor is a good player and is good at what he does besides knowing how to receive the ball without losing conrol. He is just not a prolific scorer of goals. Someone in his position getting the service he gets should be able to score thirty goals a season. Mind you it would help if he came off the wing and stayed in the centre.
We have purchase too many short term fix players and I am not sure how Redknapp was allowed to get away with the likes of Friedel, Gallas, Nelson and Saha. Who the hell allowed him to do that? It has to be you Levy. For fuck sake what is wrong with you getting these players.
Now we have a state of the art training academy we have to bring in some scouts who know what they are doing because Ian Broomfield, or whatever his name is, is clueless. Who has he uncovered for us? Redknapp apparently got rid of our talent scout and he went to Newcastle. That was a good move wasn't it.
Anyway Levy it is time to stand up and be counted. Put your hand in your pocket and wipe away the cobwebbs from your chequebook and show us Spurs fans you mean business. if you can't do it then employ someone who can because you are in danger of losing the fans. You can't keep hiding behind your wallet and going through the motions but not doing anything of any significance. We thank you for pushing ahead with the new stadium but you will need a team to attract the crowds otherwise it is pointless. Redknapp needs to know what is expected and I want to feel like he actually works for us and not someone who blames everyone else except himself. We all need to pull in the same direction including you Mr Levy. Stop being Mr Levy my wallet at home and spend some of the money you have been hoarding for some time now.
Ummmmm Gallas, that ex-gooner who apparently has 'no lilywhite blood whatsoever' captained us to our first away win against Arsenal in [insert-EMBARRASSING-number-here] years...Are you going to tell me that both Adebayor and Gallas signed for us only to destroy this team from the inside? Last time I checked, Adebayor 'LOVED' it at Tottenham and Gallas has kept his head down the whole time. Ok, he kept his head down in the middle of an FA Cup semi while Drogba walked it into the net, but overall I've been quite happy with most of his performances in our pure white shirt. Bassong would've had a mental breakdown at that semi-final...
But whatever, I've been out of the article-writing game a bit with my studies, so my opinion may be of no use...
Wow reading this way past bed time and now I can't sleep. Spooks you remind me why I love and hate being a spurs fan. It's a bit like The Johnny Cash song about the boy called sue. It's character building. We're all better people for it. After all the years of pain we've had some (short term) sustained success recently however and some idiot fans think the headless horsemen have arrived because we've finished 4th. Redknapp had us playing scintillating football and in the mix for the title with a squad he and Mr Levy put together. HR did this while enduring the toughest year if his life off the field. No distractions next year, no excuses. 2 year contract and a clean slate please and lets have a proper go. Shift some dead wood and bring in some 1st team competition and anything is possible.
Arrys critics will fall silent once the season gets under way and we swashbuckle our way to a few wins. This squad needs just a tweak or two to reach greatness. Keep the faith you lillywhites!!!!
COYS
Spooky great article !
Extend Harrys contract immediately!
Sell non of our top players !
Move out the deadwood urgently.
Make sure that Harry is given sufficient funds to bring in 3-4 top players in and that they are in place well in advance for pre-season.
Doing the above, - Glory will be just around the corner for our beloved Club.
Positive thinking, - Keep the faith !
I want to think positive but I believe that Levy wants to continue running the club on the cheap until probably he'll sell it. The new stadium issue got bogged down because of insufficient transport infrastructure. This issue needs a political decision and a lot of money to be solved. It may take some time before that.
That's also a reason that Levy keeps Harry.
HR knows his shortcomings and therefore he doesn't complain about not strengthening the squad with proper players. He accepts working with players who were bought “on the cheap” and “for free” no matter what the impact would be on the team. Then he tries to justify to the press and to the supporters those cheap choices as well his inability to coach properly the team!
That makes him the ideal manager for Levy at this moment.
They just fit perfectly with each other.
Levy intents only to spend “limited” money to buy new players when the situation becomes intolerable and therefore there is a danger the price of the club to go down.
That's why also he didn't risk last January to buy one or two proper players to consolidate third place and eventually to win the FA cup.
Spooky- that article is the best yet and has made my day. Fits of laughter.
Bringing that level of humour to the underlying pain and anxiety is absolutely exceptional.
Here's hoping Mr Levy and Arry prove us all wrong and pull a few rabbits out of the hat in the upcoming season.
I DON'T BELIEVE IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Someone has given us a summary of what has been happening at WHL for the past 30 years. You only have to change a couple of names. We bought Chris Armstrong when we could have had Bergkamp. We got Rebrov, Postiga, Tremazzani, Bujencovic (or whatever) Ricketts, Ascimovic et al who all looked like they were not quite sure what they were doing there. Wenger said some years ago that he couldn't quite understand why Spurs had not done better. The two clubs were the same size, same following , same location etc. WHAT HAS GONE WRONG FOR SO LONG? If we have another year like the last one the Trades Description Office will insist we change our name to TOTTERING HOTSPUR.
It would be a boring place if everyone held hands and gleefully skipped across beautiful green meadows.
My over inflated ego can take a hit, every so often.
"We want Francis Drake. We've got Captain Birdseye." Ha ha!
I'm guessing that the bit about Adebayor is a backhanded dig at those who don't think he's all that.
As others have said, playing as a lone striker in a team that creates as many chances as we do, he should be scoring a lot more.
As far as I can see, there are only two options regarding rent-a-gob: either give him a long term contract, or sack him now. Anything in-between is neither here nor there; just postponing the inevitable. I can't stand the bloke, and the very thought of Levy giving him a 4 year contract makes me feel sick to the pit of my stomach. Surely Levy won't want this wanker stinking the club out for another 4 seasons, and he sure as hell won't want to pay out for terminating a long contract if things don't work out.
Kick the scumbag out now Levy, please!
Mr. Levy, Please extend Harrys contract immediately, - the fact remains as I am sure you already know, Harry is the best Manager Spurs have had, ever since Bshaw was in charge at The Lane ! Last 3 seasons 4th,5th,4th positions, - this he recieved despite you did not back him up with the players he really wanted to bring in and instead had to put up with your last minute transfer day dealings ! I trust that you have learned your lesson and this time around will give him an extended cantract as a matter of urgency, open up the purse and do all the dealings to bring in the new players well in advance of pre-season, - if you do this, - Glory will be just around the corner for our beloved club !
Keep The Faith Keep Harry !
Why is Parker driving Harry to Portsmouth?
Masterful stuff, Spooky.
You've managed to vent the collective spleen and have a dig at our keyboard warriors in one sitting.
Spooky, surely your best 'piece' to date. It was literally a game of two halves. Triffic.First half you come over all good cop, with eloquence and gentle but probing reasoning, second half, wow, you hit us right between the eyes. Talk about a roller coaster, it had almost the same effect. I thought everyone had exhausted all there was to say about last season and I was not looking forward to what I thought would be your sabbatical Spooky. But you are nothing if not prolific and this explains why we have so many trolls on this 'our' site. Had I read this before turning out the lights, I too would have had broken sleep. All the things you say are that which we feel, but are unable to articulate as you do, but the inert frustration is something that we all share. All the problems at our club are glaringly obvious and yet nowone acts on them in a decisive way-is it just Mr Levy pulling the strings financially? Is there not a board of Directors who meet to take collective decisions, such as whether the Manager stays or goes? You know, round a table, show of hands etc.those for, those against the sandbanks part timer? And it must be part time
as it is a 3 hour commute to North London-I know as I live on the south coast-so that is 6 hours travelling daily (ish) Got to take
it's toll physically on a pensioner. I had a job once where despite assurances a new contract was not forthcoming and guess what- I gave up trying, could not care less. No excuses, but it is human nature. And so if H is not given a new contract, same thing and Spurs will once again fail to build on 4th spot. Both of the 2 new promising Premiership managers we were/were not
(delete as appropriate) linked with, have been seduced by bigger clubs, so both would have been tempted to awake the (once)
mighty Spurs. Despite that throwaway comment, I am positive.Thanks Spooky.
LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT..... The only contract extension i wana see is yours spooky as far as i'm concerned your contract writing Dear Mr Levy is for life... You truly are a star and master of words. Another absolute classic !!! they keep on coming. Oh yea sweet FA with the first comment has had a personality by pass operation... please ignore.
genius. 'nuff said.
Is that you above me, dear Beryl?
Some people don't do sarcasm/satire/general literary brilliance obviously...perhaps dig into the back catalogue for some context before making a high and mighty comment that completely misses the point?
The Ade bit is brilliant. Basically a summary of most the comments I've had the misfortune to read/hear through the season. Who cares if he actually makes the team tick and scored 15 goals (plus 10 assists) in the league - he mis controls the ball every now and then and is a Gooner (despite the fact he hates them and they hate him). Burn him. Would help if he banged in a tiny percentage more of the chances he misses though...could have had 30!
It's put up or shut up time now for Levy and Redknapp. Either a new deal for Redknapp and significant investment or bomb him out and "start again" (again) with a war chest for a new man if HR doesn't fit or isn't trusted by ENIC for the long-term - my fear, however, is that we'll do neither and muddle through another season without decisive action before Levy's hand is well and truly forced next summer.
(I'm also aware that "muddling through" to finish 4th is a damn site better than the rest of the last 20 years)
"No compensation is forthcoming as the England job has long since past."
Spell-check failure........ ;-)
had me in stitches.
such a great article
Excellent work Spooky!
Another master class in fence sitting.
Come on lad. You've been knocking around these parts long enough to know what the 'letters' are meant to portray.
Don't point the finger at me, point it at the rest of us.
I know what they are, I've already read most of the comments on most of the sites. I'd like you to stick your head above the letter and give it to me straight, but you're such a tease x
"Everyone should be grateful for that stability, he proved many wrong. But we need someone younger and modern and committed. Someone for the long term. Someone that wants to be part of the club beyond a cheap soundbite. The players appear mystified and confused. Redknapp has exhausted his chest of ideas, flat out. There's nothing to grab hold of"
From the Regression series of articles just before the end of the season.
I want him gone. I know I'm polite about it and if he remains I'll have to latch onto the positives for another season, but he fucked us over last season (regardless of all the bad fortune and whatever other conspiracies).
Just don't go asking me who to replace him with.
Why didn't we just get Rogers?
knockers, big shiny nockers
Spooky, - you finally came out of the bush, - I fail to see how you can feel that Old Harry fucked us over last season ? I am new to this site, but have for years enjoyed your well written aticles, - I have been a Spurs fan since B.shaw went over to BA after the worldcup in 78 and bought Ossie & Villa back to The Lane and I gotta tell you watching Spurs all those years, I do think that Harry is the best Manager since Bshaw was in charge at The Lane ( with due credit to Venables and Pleaty )... 3 last seasons 2 4th and 1 5th position, and this on a very limited budget. Now of course we all want more, win every game and competition/cup, but I do not think any other/new manager could come in at this point and do a better job than Harry, - so lets give Harry an extension, say 2 years in addition to the one year left of his contract and then maybe groom Sherwood to take over from him then, - Let not forget that it was Harrys brilliant idea to have Sherwood & Ferdie come in and run the develoment squad,- just an idea, - over to you Spooky ? All the best Allan
Fucked us over are strong words, but I've echoed the sentiments for a while now that he lost focus. I don't buy into the players and the press about the England job not affecting the side. Sure, Redknapp had a heart op and a court case, and perhaps if he wasn't so detached from the club (he's like a consultant rather than our manager) then we might sympathise with him far more.
He lacks the cutting edge. That doesn't mean he wont lead us to 4th or better next season. And sure, in relative terms when you take perspective into account based on the clubs around us, we are doing very well. It's just that with what he's got and the position we were in, he lost it. No balls, no real decisiveness.
We don't know what happens behind closed doors but I also think his relationship with Levy is a strange one. It's almost like he communicates with him from afar via the media.
Redknapp seems to be incapable of committing even if its just a façade of commitment to get the fans behind him. He just can't help putting himself first. The fact that he could so quite easily except the Chelsea job (just throwing it out there as an example) proves how tunnelled he is with his own agenda. Other managers use clubs to further their careers but they do so with guile and desire. I think Harry likes and enjoys the ride but wants to get off when it goes to shit.
It's worth noting, I do get the fact we missed out on 3rd by a point/two points and the CL thanks to Chelsea. Any other season, probably would not have mattered, but the change in expectations is something a manager should be capable of handling. He isn't. I guess, in his defence, he's never managed at this level before. West Ham United is like taking kids down to the park for a kick about.
Spooky, I think at this point stability is the name of the game, - therefore lets get Harry an extension ! I also gonna have to put you on the spot, who else if not an extension for Harry? Alot of what is written in the press about Harry is nonsense, - The Chelsea job ? never heard anything from Harry about that, just press speculation. I pray that Levy will make up his mind about Harry soon, because the longer Levy takes in deciding to back Harry or not, the worse for our beloved club, we need this matter solved a.s.a.p
The next man in? Don't know. Which is probably why I don't scream it from the roof tops to get him out as I'd be pushed to give my name for the replacement.
Stability? That's the reason Harry came in. Even if Levy denies this. And it's worked. I guess if it has to work for another season, then we're stuck with it.
Spooky, thats excactly my point, - Harry did bring the stabillty we all graved and Yes Levy knows it !
I will now proudly scream from the roof top " Levy give Harry that extension now !!! "
Furthermore maybe after Old Harry have got us 2nd and 3rd position, - then bring in young Sherwood to complete the job and finally bring the so very elusive Glory back to to The lane !
Love The Shirt Love The Spurs
Excellent piece, Spooky.
If Redknapp is given another season then at least he should be fully focused on his job, unlike last year. I knew as soon as Capello quit that we were in trouble, and left a comment on your site at the time comparing the situation to Fergie announcing his departure at United and the subsequent adverse affect it had on his team. I didn't expect things to go quite as spectacularly wrong as they did though.
Levy should have got a handle on the situation at the first sign of trouble, maybe he did try and it had no effect. I feel he should have come out with a statement similar to the Modric stance and publicly informed the FA that Redknapp would not be available at any price until the summer.
Instead, we had a media feeding frenzy with rival clubs' players and managers using it as an opportunity to destabilise the team and derail the season.
It can be argued that this type of thing has no real effect, but history suggests that it does.
Redknapp was keen to tell the media that football players don't care about the future, they just 'get on with it'. Complete rubbish. Then, after Roy is given the job, Redknapp admitted that his coaching staff had seen first hand the problems it had caused in and around the club.
I feel that Levy and Redknapp have a lot of explaining to do, and they both failed to do their jobs properly.
However, Redknapp does deserve another season, paradoxically due to our 4th place finish.
PS. Sir Francis Drake was also a pirate.
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Allan-not sure where this Sherwood for future manager has come from and what exactly have sir les and all the other members of the ginormous coaching team done for Spurs - we've had a problem scoring from corners and set pieces for years and in free play the last quarter of the season-real basics. Am guessing that if H goes, all the backroom boys would have to go too, as a new man would want his own team on board, so H and the half dozen lieutenants would amount to a lot of compensation payable. I have
mooted Chris Hughton previously, as a worthy replacement for H, he has the experience and would give the club something the
sandbanks one never could-loyalty.
Brilliantly entertaining Spooks but get some perspective.
We have made good progress with greater stability in the last several years.
With a little more investment and commitment we might even have done better.
We should have got third this year but circumstances robbed us.
Cruel fate decreed that we will not even play in CL.
That particular disaster was not directly Harry's fault.
Harry has a year to go unless he buggers off to Bahrain or somewhere.
Levy won't sack him or extend his contract.
We got used to the idea that he was leaving and began planning an exciting new era.
But the irritating self obsessed media whore is still with us
and we will have to wait another year.
No need for hysteria man.
Super piece. Funny, sad and tragic...
...because it is true in so many respects.
Serious top level clubs are run like serious top level businesses but they remain clubs at heart - see Barca, Real, Inter, Bayern and so forth, perhaps even Man Utd. The best clubs can marry fan considerations/hopes alongside titles and commercial success.
In our case at WHL - year after year our mob at WHL pursue only the latter. ENOUGH.
WE OBJECT TO HAVING BECOME AN OBJECT OF INVESTMENT RETURNS FOR ENIC AND THE REST. IT IS CLEAR THIS IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS TO YOU LEVY.
IF YOU GAVE HALF A SHIT YOU WOULD MARRY OUR OBJECTIVES AND DEVELOP MORE THAN A SINGULAR PATH TO SUCCESS. WE NEED A COHERENT SHARED STRATEGY FOR FAN AND PLAYERS TO ROLL BEHIND.
AS YOU CARE NOT FOR THE FANS AND PERHAPS EVEN THE PLAYERS WE HAVE NEVER HAD A COHERENT APPROACH TOWARDS SUCCESS.
Proof is in the eating - or stuff is rancid. No backbone to the team, no manager worth a damn, no stadium.
YOU HAVE TRIED TO STEAL OUR CLUB.
So, time to go Levy - get out.
I would rather we were a club again.
For what it's worth, I owe you an apology spooky; I now remember you saying that (so much gets lost amongst the bollocks, mostly yours ;-)).
You can't be all things to all of the people.