Darren Bent Whorage

More 'ITK' gossip from a 'Spurs Insider'. This one from season ticket holder WestStandJolly. Claims to know someone who knows Bent. Much like the previous piece of whorage posted in this blog. Wonderful stuff.

Spoke to a contact who has had (lets say) contact, with Bent in recent weeks. Darren didn't say much about WHU other than they might not be the right club for him. That and all the Sheff Utd hearing and potential outcome, doesn't want to play for a club that might start the season with -10 points. Said they offered him a shedload.

A typical Spurs 'ITK'

Wants to play for Spurs who are more than likely one of a number of possible destinations for him. Charlton want their moneys worth but will probably get more desperate for an injection of cash + players closer to the summers end. Gardner being the make-weight, with one or two others as potential (Routledge). Told in confidence that he will be playing in the Prem next season, and I believe him. If the deal happens, should be announced in 2 or so weeks time.

Levy is also going all out to bring in a left-winger, a centre-back and another midfielder (Levy apparently quoted as stating he wants the club to sign a player of Gascoignes or Ginolas ilk - a definitive classic Spurs player. Apparently, Jol has said 'If only there was a Dave Mackay out there for us'. Holland, Spain, France and Brazil are the target countries that Comolli has been working on with our scouting network.

Hope to have more info soon.

Yep, it's like golddust. Without these people, what would we possibly do in the time between the club genuinely speaks to a player and signs him and then announces it to the fans.

Before any of you idiots throw the 'DONT FEED THE ITK'S' comment in my face, don't bother. That comment in a previous blog was ironic. How can I possibly not feed the little blighters when they are akin to a Lazarus Pit, forever giving life to all that should be dead.

Between their constant sewage of information and the need for me to break into the Big Brother house to head-butt Charley, I have my entertainment sewn up till my community service ends and I can resource more time to better spent activities.

Plucked from a Spurs forum

Posted on COYS by HH:

OK for all you doubters.

Darren Bent is Spurs

From the man himself, just got the phone 2 minutes ago.

Don't expect an announcement from the club until July 1st.

The fee will not be announced but it is nowhere near what we offered Charlton for him last January.

BTW there is a real chance of further sanctions against West Ham.

All this from one phone call. The comment about sanctions against WH must be a hint that Bent decided against them because of the possibility of relegation - though, doubtful anyone has the bollocks to dish out the punishment they should have got months back when the Prem League choked and bottled it.

In addition, HH has also stated that 2 players will leave Spurs to join Charlton - one on loan and one on a permanent contract. Routledge is surely one of them. He also had this to say:

There are more but I will not have anymore real information till at least next monday.

But it will be the details of the last of the 4 major signings we are after this season.

Bale, Kaboul, Bent, and ? (it was Nani). I will leave you all to speculate, but I will tell you now it ain't an out and out LW.

Not an out and out left winger. Because left wingers are as rare as rocking horse shit. So, I'm meant to believe that Darren Bent called up HH and told him he's joining Spurs but not officially until July 1st when we announce it....while the chief executive of Charlton states:

"We look forward to Darren starting with us in the Championship next season, which is a massive boost to our chance of returning to the Premier League."

We set a valuation for Darren and West Ham were the only club prepared to meet that valuation"

Yes. Charlton will not sell him unless a club matches their valuation. Something only the desperate 'ammers have done. So how is offering less money and a couple of players going to turn Charlton's head?

If anything Man Utd will bid for him, needing a striker now that Saha is injured. Again.

So, we are after a 4th player? No shit Sherlock, who would have guessed, considering we have needed a left-winger for years now.

Oh, and nice one on the 'July 1st' announcement. Thats a convenient 2 and a bit weeks that HH can enjoy ITK status before he gets found out for being a drunk deluded charlatan and IP banned. The worship of false Gods is frowned upon. Ask Moses and that mob that followed him around. It was their fault they got lost for a few decades, preferring to listen to the mis-guided few instead of Charlton Heston.

Well, listen to Spooky. There are very few very limited variables when it comes to predicting who will sign for who. Throw enough shit at the wall and some of it will stick. Try throwing diarrhea and it will stick all over you.

DONT FEED THE ITK'S.

more pish

I'm beginning to believe that maybe these ITK characters know as much as a blind and deaf fly thats high and intoxicated on dog shit. I wasn't out and about today due to the textbook Bank holiday weather. Preferred to remain indoors, working on one or two projects. And then this gem was posted on a forum:

"today/lates tom kalboul the auxere fella announced then

after that as most kno by now the target is to get nani,bent....

massive chance defoe going few in for him

also if we get a replacment they are happy with they would take the 10 mil on offer from chelsea which is true fact... (chimbonda)

will be a very busy few weeks

ghaly,mido priorties to get rid off

stalteri and tanio our on last years of contract and jol especially in teemus case is happy to let them see it out...."

So, just in case you are not understanding the above quote, this is whorage. In the know information that has been overheard/passed on/taken/eavesdropped/told in confidence/seen from a tree. Or perhaps, on this occassion, Ben (the author) simply read The News of the World over the weekend and then asked a random four-year old to dictate his findings.

Perhaps, this Ben character (if that really is his name) is nothing more than an Agent of Levy. Disinformation to go with his tree-theatrics. Placing his treeatrics aside for a moment, one has to question the logic of Chelsea chasing Chimbonda and wanting to spend £10M on him rather than the young and brilliant Daniel Alves. As for Mido and Ghaly, well I wonder what gives any ITK the idea that the probability of them remaining at Spurs is not so great.

Oh, and Robbie Keane signed a new 5 year contract today. But I'm guessing nobody at Spurs has bothered to talk about that openly, hence the reason you didn't hear the news on a forum 2 days ago.