The top five alternative existences of Charlie Adam.

Sunday, July 29, 2012 at 11:49AM
spooky in Charlie Adam, Gareth Bale

5 - Carcass for pig feeds

4 - Chained up yard dog

3 - Subsitute for rat poison in badly mixed batch of cocaine

2 - The pus in a zit on the arse of Joey Barton

1 - Footballer

Article originally appeared on Dear Mr Levy (http://dml23.squarespace.com/).