The biggest game in our history ever. Lose to Hull City at White Hart Lane and the smell and smoke from the burning season tickets will cover N17 into indefinite darkness, with the faint light of Championship football bearing ever closer.

A recent photo of Tottenham Hotspur

It will be our worst start to a season since 1912. 96 years since the Titanic hit an iceberg and sank to the depths of the sea.

You couldn't make this shit up.